Lend your advice please.

[Nathan Drake]

I do value my opinion.

Now tell me something, you tell people in this thread how you have gone to "a bridge jumpers rescue", wished you had helped a friend who just committed suicide and you are asking for advice, so why so insulting?

I find it very strange how some one so "kind and caring" about others would even contemplate what you were thinking of doing, and why insult people here when you asked for their opinion, advice.

You didn't like the "village idiot" crack, do you have any idea what the people you think you are helping might do, if you told them what was going on?

Outing some one is destroying their life, have you ever seen a person who has hanged themselves with a coat hanger, or some one who has bled out in a bathtub, over some thing we would consider trivial.
But it isn't trivial to them.

Make fun of me if it makes you feel better, it just shows what kind of man you really are.

Classic takeover maneuver to now focus on my reaction to your weak attempt at wit.

I don't constantly hold my own opinion to be the best opinion, unlike yourself. It's why I'm on the board, and it's saved me more than a couple of times.

Do you have a problem with my post? The beauty is, you've the free will and the choice to skip it. You don't need to understand why I'd make the post, you either be a sport and hopefully make a meaningful contribution. or you don't. you choose.

Is there anything else you want to detract with?

One more thing.

I never understood why some one who was supposedly intelligent would come on a public forum and say ex:

Hi Gang
I feel like punching my buddy in the gut today, what do you think?

DUH!

Thanks again for that great opinion!

 

[LickRus]

Listen ya'll...I've been outted. by my best friends, by people in this business, by owners, etc. It fucking sucks. Who the hell is anyone to out ANYONE!! It is not ok!

Wow If everyone is ratting on you like you said above, I would take a look in the mirror and reflect. An occasional rat could happen, but its different when it happens all the time and with everyone.

 

[CapitalGuy]

Well you see, when I'm fartin' around the club playing $2 nassaus, I'm golfing. But, if I were to join the PGA, I wouldn't be golfing. I'd be working.

If I'm whipping up dinner for a few friends at home, I'm cooking. But if I ran the kitchen at auberge....

Husband: "You slut - how could you sleep around on me?!? Where did we go wrong? Why would you cheat on me; how could you do it? I'm devastated that you cheated on me! This marriage is OVER!!!"

Wife: " No babe, it's not like that AT ALL! I've been escorting, the men I've slept with have all paid me for my time and services, I swear!"

Husband: "oh, we'll then. No worries babe. And here I thought you were sleeping around on me! Lol. Come on, lets go see your mom for a bit."

 

[TeasePlease]

I just have a problem with the men that partake of the SP's company, pay them, tip them, and then rip them apart on a forum.

Why does the poster assume his friend is in trouble because she is an SP, as I stated here before if he was dating a Lawyer, Health Care Worker, Model etc. she may have
more notches on her belt than an SP, and I checked SP's for STD's before I became one, I would rather date the SP than the girl next door.

Im not sure that anyone is ripping apart SPs here, or assuming that his friend is in trouble.

I think you would agree that being a SP is not the same as being a lawyer, social worker, etc. We know it's not...precisely because SPs are so worked up about being "outed".

But isn't it the very same reason that dating or being in a serious relationship with a SP is not just any other relationship? Indeed, isn't that the very reason that a guy is entitled to know?

Never mind the stds. What about the social stigma? Y'know, the exact same one that the girl is so conscious of? (Pardon my dangling participle)

 

[Sophia Sinclair]

Allison, please also don't be so sure that all working girls share your opinion, because it is clearly not the case. Getting some pm's from well known board girls, giving me great advice on how to approach the 'reveal' if you will.

Nathan Drake,

You can tell a child a million times to not talk to strangers in an attempt to protect them from possible predators, but they most likely will anyway. If you have them interact with others while in your presence, so that they can witness what normal interactions with harmless adults is like, they can better determine when a stranger is acting odd or potentially dangerous.

Having said that, maybe these ladies do feel the way AllisonElm, others and myself do, but simply aren't telling you so. Maybe they're attempting to protect a fellow worker/lady by minimizing any damage you will cause this woman, your friend (of whom we have no idea as to whether he is faithful or not to her, as you most likely don't either, for I'm certain he doesn't tell you about all of his activities as you surely don't tell him all of yours) and yourself with your apparent incessant need to be the bearer of this so-called knowledge. If this were a court of law (which of course it isn't and thankfully so) you'd want to make certain you had all your facts straight before going forth with a law suit, so that you don't make any false accusations, etc., thereby losing your case, and having to deal with the negative consequences of your actions, both monetary and otherwise. I say this because we never really know another person's true thoughts on a matter or motivations, unless of course we ask them and they tell us and are being truthful with their responses. Anything else is mere speculation on our part.

You sir are a self proclaimed kind, caring, thoughtful, etc. guy. Well then, my advice to you, since you ask, is that you don't need us TERBites (myself included), you simply need to let your conscience be your guide!

Sincerely,
Miss Sinful Sophia

 

[Nathan Drake]

Thanks Sophia,

I was referring to the fact that I have some well known girls msg me too say that yes, indeed they would tell their partner, and that it isn't right.

So I understand your point, but it's not exactly what's happening here.

Do you really believe that there is no increased risk of anything by dating an SP? Certainly the risk is increased/decreased depending in the SP herself IMO....but let's not wear that hat redvelvet loves mentioning so much. We are all taking a risk being in this lifestyle, that isn't a secret.

A risk to our health, how other perceive us..etc

 

[Nathan Drake]

Redvelvet. Please give me an example of me ripping apart the SP, talking shit about the profession...or creating a puritanical deity out of my friend.

Your posts consistently lose scope, and instead you choose to attack me.

Fine by me.

'If the hat fits, wear it'

I understand your view on this maybe skewed from your previous experiences of being outed many times, as you mentioned.

 

[Occasionally]

Since he's a good buddy since childhood, I'd tell him and let him make a decision what to do next.

Whatever you do, don't be a horn dog and get some action first, use your knowledge as blackmail or anything. And if your buddy decides to stay with her (regardless if he already knows this or not), then respect the decision and keep your mouth shut. It will be hard to do as you'll surely end up meeting her one day, but if so you got to play dumb and assume she doesn't know that you know. Even if she knows that you know now, then just keep it on the down low.

He's your buddy after all. Give advice, but don't nag.

Don't be a gossiper because something might end up happening to you one day and you wouldn't want your buddy taking advantage of your situation either.

 

[Sophia Sinclair]

TeasePlease

Im not sure that anyone is ripping apart SPs here, or assuming that his friend is in trouble.

I think you would agree that being a SP is not the same as being a lawyer, social worker, etc.
No, but maybe some of them were SPs to pay for their education to become these things and maybe some of them are more promiscuous than SP's are when not actually working (i.e. seeing a client). When I'm not dating anyone on a personal level I'm not sleeping with anyone other than clients. I get enough sex at work and don't need to look for it elsewhere, but the so-called normal/average women you reference may be hitting the bar scene every weekend, getting caned and screwing the bouncer condomless in the coatroom. Assumptions about SP's are being made here!

We know it's not...precisely because SPs are so worked up about being "outed".
As are many hobbyists, hence their concern over providing a simple cell number.

But isn't it the very same reason that dating or being in a serious relationship with a SP is not just any other relationship?
I believe that Julia Robert's character in Notting Hill said it best, "Don't forget, I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her". It truly isn't that different!

Indeed, isn't that the very reason that a guy is entitled to know?
It is her responsibility/decision to tell him just as it is every hobbyist's/cheater's responsibility/decision to tell their SO, not some possible attention seeking individual who is very much removed from the overall situation.

Never mind the stds. What about the social stigma? Y'know, the exact same one that the girl is so conscious of? (Pardon my dangling participle) I highly doubt that the social stigma attached to dating an SP is equal to that of actually being one.

 

[Nathan Drake]

Occasionally...

To get back on the topic, I really feel as if my friend is having some type of mental issues...because I think her account is fake.

To me there is no way. Today a photo was posted. Again only of her, but she didn't post this. My friend did. Apparently taken on his phone, of this lady in a provocative pose.

His like button was on fire with some words of encouragement...

Thanks to the board and image searching I gathered that indeed that photo was taken from another add of hers, from a long while back.

Unfortunate but I think that's what's going on, and if it is the case..conversation done

i don't need any more suicide in my life.

"Hey bro? Your fake gf is a SP...ah yeah. I guess you knew that...."

I still don't get why the F he'd be doing this...unless it's to get an old girl jealous.

Or maybe he took that photo from the add, and just kept it until now.

Jedi mind fucked right now.

 

[Occasionally]

Well, if there's some weird stuff going on that's different. But if it truly is your buddy's GF is an SP, I'd tell him. But of course, be nice about it. His reaction could be.... "Yeah, I know". Or, "Really? Oh shit". Regardless of the response, just respond cool and ensure you're telling him as a friend and being supportive and not a reply like.... "Hahaha. Dude, you're screwed". Also, regardless of what he says and does, ensure to tell him you won't say anything to anyone else. And you shouldn't anyway.

Or play it cool, but funny. He might even joke back to you.... "Why are you checking BP?" Then you both could have a laugh.

Regardless, it could go either way. But whatever happens just ensure you put the best intentions forward so if something bad happens don't blame yourself. It's not like you are trying to take advantage of the situation.

 

[jm06fw]

leave it for sure. you'll out her in her own mind and you'll lose your buddy forever.

 

[Occasionally]

To me it really comes down to weighing the possible meltdown vs. the relationship with your buddy. It seems he's a good enough buddy (and family) you've known for a while. On the other hand, if you think the trouble that may happen is not worth bringing up, then forget it. If I was in your shoes, I'd probably tell. I know some people in that same kind of FB/childhood relationship. Good friends, know the family, but since everyone is older and getting on with their lives it not like anybody hangs out after school playing everyday. I might be lucky to see some friends like that once a year now. But in my heart, they are pretty much family. Just because they aren't blood, or that I don't hang out with them every week doesn't mean I don't treat them like family.

One thing you also have to think about is the possibility of something like trouble happening down the road, and you say you knew. He might say.... "Really? Why didn't you tell me?"

 

[Sophia Sinclair]

Nathan Drake

Thanks Sophia,

I was referring to the fact that I have some well known girls msg me too say that yes, indeed they would tell their partner, and that it isn't right.
Forgive me for saying so, but until any of them come forward in a public fashion (i.e. stating their beliefs/thoughts anywhere in this thread, which they are perfectly capable of doing/entitled to do so) or privately message me, I'm simply not willing to take your word for it. I know absolutely nothing about you, much as you know absolutely nothing about me or the woman in question, and for all I know you could be a pathological liar, have mental issues or ulterior motives. Maybe their motivation is to simply eliminate some of the competition (it is January and you did say you want to **** her) and gain favour with you in the hope that you'll use their services. Don't believe everything you hear or are told and remember that things are often much easier said than actually followed through on or acted upon in real life and not just TERBland.

So I understand your point, but it's not exactly what's happening here.

Do you really believe that there is no increased risk of anything by dating an SP? Certainly the risk is increased/decreased depending in the SP herself IMO....but let's not wear that hat redvelvet loves mentioning so much. We are all taking a risk being in this lifestyle, that isn't a secret.

A risk to our health, how other perceive us..etc
Please see my response to TeasePlease for the answer to these questions.

Bottom Line, we never know who were getting involved with when we meet someone and unless you are beyond judgement/reproach yourself you shouldn't be pointing fingers. I really can't stand self righteous or hypocritical people!

 

[Nathan Drake]

Nathan Drake Thanks Sophia, I was referring to the fact that I have some well known girls msg me too say that yes, indeed they would tell their partner, and that it isn't right. Forgive me for saying so, but until any of them come forward in a public fashion (i.e. stating their beliefs/thoughts anywhere in this thread, which they are perfectly capable of doing/entitled to do so) or privately message me, I'm simply not willing to take your word for it. I know absolutely nothing about you, much as you know absolutely nothing about me or the woman in question, and for all I know you could be a pathological liar, have mental issues or ulterior motives. Maybe their motivation is to simply eliminate some of the competition (it is January) or gain favour with you in the hope that you'll use their services. Don't believe everything you hear or are told and remember that things are often much easier said than actually followed through on or acted upon. So I understand your point, but it's not exactly what's happening here. Do you really believe that there is no increased risk of anything by dating an SP? Certainly the risk is increased/decreased depending in the SP herself IMO....but let's not wear that hat redvelvet loves mentioning so much. We are all taking a risk being in this lifestyle, that isn't a secret. A risk to our health, how other perceive us..etc Please see my response to TeasePlease for the answer to these questions. Bottom Line, we never know who were getting involved with when we meet someone and unless you are beyond judgement/reproach yourself you shouldn't be pointing fingers. I really can't stand self righteous or hypocritical people.

I've asked for opinions here, that's about it. You can call me whatever you like...we know the old adages

You are entitled to your opinion, way off about me as it is. I think that's the SP goggles blurring it up a bit.

Can I ask, as an SP...has your view on men changed since you got into the profession?

 

[Sophia Sinclair]

I've asked for opinions here, that's about it. You can call me whatever you like...we know the old adages

You are entitled to your opinion, way off about me as it is. I think that's the SP goggles blurring it up a bit.

Can I ask, as an SP...has your view on men changed since you got into the profession?

Actually Nathan Drake, I've met men in this industry who have treated me better than any boyfriend, pretty much every one of which has cheated on me and lied to me about it, both prior to doing this and since, whilst I never cheated on them, other than workwise in the last few years of my life and only with those who didn't know, as I didn't feel it was any of their business at the time. Clearly I was correct as they cheated on me, not even knowing what I do, proving them to be unfaithful period. I can assure you that this is not SP Goggles as you put it, but the insight of an experienced woman who has seen more than her fair share of BS being perpetuated by men. I don't date many women so have little experience to speak of that way and am not saying that only men cheat as obviously women do as well. The truth of the matter is that most men deem their SO sleeping with another man as cheating no matter what the involvement, whereas women are more threatened if there is an emotional attachment, than necessarily by the act in and of itself. The male counterpart of a truly swinging couple said it to me best, "A lot of men are insecure.", and I would add, hypocritical.

Do I feel bad for some of the wives that are being cheated on? Yes, but what they don't know won't hurt them and I don't see any reason to upset the apple cart. Some guys are being honest when they say they're in a loveless/non intimate rel'p and others are simply being selfish and hypocritical to boot as they would not accept the same behaviour on the part of their SO. Despite my thoughts, do I rat them out when their SO's call me (it has occasionally happened)? No, as what goes on in their rel'p is their business, not mine, and this would apply to any client, friend or not. I have both street and book smarts and believe in street logic more so! Note that a lot of the older gents like bigshot, etc. are using the same street logic I am and advising you to stay out of what is really none of your business.

Sorry, but I'm just not buying your (cough - feigned) concern over your friend's state of affairs, who by your own admission now might be having some sort of mental issues or playing some sort of trick on an ex, proving that you don't really know him all that well at all, like I've been saying, and thereby have wasted all of our time by creating quite a stir on TERB for attention, not caring who you upset or hurt!

Here's my final opinion/advise and I'll not say anymore about the matter. If it looks like a rat, walks like a rat and sounds like a rat, it usually is a rat.

 

[Art Mann]

. . . "A lot of men are insecure.", and I would add, hypocritical. . . .

And many of them prove it with their posts on this board.

. . . . If it looks like a rat, walks like a rat and sounds like a rat, it usually is a rat.

A great deal of wisdom here.

 

[TeasePlease]

TeasePlease

Im not sure that anyone is ripping apart SPs here, or assuming that his friend is in trouble.

I think you would agree that being a SP is not the same as being a lawyer, social worker, etc.
No, but maybe some of them were SPs to pay for their education to become these things and maybe some of them are more promiscuous than SP's are when not actually working (i.e. seeing a client). When I'm not dating anyone on a personal level I'm not sleeping with anyone other than clients. I get enough sex at work and don't need to look for it elsewhere, but the so-called normal/average women you reference may be hitting the bar scene every weekend, getting caned and screwing the bouncer condomless in the coatroom. Assumptions about SP's are being made here!

Incredible assumptions, indeed! What does how someone paid for their education have anything to do with how they might behave outside of the office? Are you suggesting that girls who chose to pay for school by escorting and then quit to work straight jobs will likely become dirty sluts who have random unprotected sex for free?!? Hot damn!

So, it's ok for you to have sex with other guys because you're a professional seeing clients. Not a promiscuous girl on the club scene? Aren't you making some pretty darn big assumptions about non-working girls? Are all normal average women, and especially lawyers and social workers, promiscuous nymphomaniacs??? Sweet beesus!


We know it's not...precisely because SPs are so worked up about being "outed".
As are many hobbyists, hence their concern over providing a simple cell number.

Nice deflection. Do you agree with the point or not?


But isn't it the very same reason that dating or being in a serious relationship with a SP is not just any other relationship?
I believe that Julia Robert's character in Notting Hill said it best, "Don't forget, I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her". It truly isn't that different!

A wonderful image. I can respect your opinion. I hope you can see why someone may disagree. Being in a relationship with a working girl adds many complexities. In some ways, it's amazing. In others, it's difficult. For example, going to the mall with a well known SP or MPA can be fun. With all the furtive glances from guys.... If you think that kind of attention is fun.

To be fair, falling for an SP is as simple as your reference. In order to make it work, we have to choose to accept the person, and love them. The rest is just details. My point is that it is not fair to ask someone to make that decision without full knowledge of who they are.


Indeed, isn't that the very reason that a guy is entitled to know?
It is her responsibility/decision to tell him just as it is every hobbyist's/cheater's responsibility/decision to tell their SO, not some possible attention seeking individual who is very much removed from the overall situation.

That's your opinion on whether a friend has a moral obligation to act, or stfu. Mine differs. Not sure where you got attention seeking individual from. Not sure what positive attention would be gotten.

Never mind the stds. What about the social stigma? Y'know, the exact same one that the girl is so conscious of? (Pardon my dangling participle) I highly doubt that the social stigma attached to dating an SP is equal to that of actually being one.

Wow. Quite a statement. I suppose that's the justification for discounting the feelings of the guy in this situation. It's the girl's job, the girl's social risk, the girl's prerogative to withhold the information from the guy. Heckuva recipe for a mutually trusting and respectful relationship.

This is way too early for a facepalm.

 

[Nathan Drake]

Actually Nathan Drake, I've met men in this industry who have treated me better than any boyfriend, pretty much every one of which has cheated on me and lied to me about it, both prior to doing this and since, whilst I never cheated on them, other than workwise in the last few years of my life and only with those who didn't know, as I didn't feel it was any of their business at the time. Clearly I was correct as they cheated on me, not even knowing what I do, proving them to be unfaithful period. I can assure you that this is not SP Goggles as you put it, but the insight of an experienced woman who has seen more than her fair share of BS being perpetuated by men. I don't date many women so have little experience to speak of that way and am not saying that only men cheat as obviously women do as well. The truth of the matter is that most men deem their SO sleeping with another man as cheating no matter what the involvement, whereas women are more threatened if there is an emotional attachment, than necessarily by the act in and of itself. The male counterpart of a truly swinging couple said it to me best, "A lot of men are insecure.", and I would add, hypocritical. Do I feel bad for some of the wives that are being cheated on? Yes, but what they don't know won't hurt them and I don't see any reason to upset the apple cart. Some guys are being honest when they say they're in a loveless/non intimate rel'p and others are simply being selfish and hypocritical to boot as they would not accept the same behaviour on the part of their SO. Despite my thoughts, do I rat them out when their SO's call me (it has occasionally happened)? No, as what goes on in their rel'p is their business, not mine, and this would apply to any client, friend or not. I have both street and book smarts and believe in street logic more so! Note that a lot of the older gents like bigshot, etc. are using the same street logic I am and advising you to stay out of what is really none of your business. Sorry, but I'm just not buying your (cough - feigned) concern over your friend's state of affairs, who by your own admission now might be having some sort of mental issues or playing some sort of trick on an ex, proving that you don't really know him all that well at all, like I've been saying, and thereby have wasted all of our time by creating quite a stir on TERB for attention, not caring who you upset or hurt! Here's my final opinion/advise and I'll not say anymore about the matter. If it looks like a rat, walks like a rat and sounds like a rat, it usually is a rat.

Self righteous. Hypocritical, with some long pointy fingers.

 

[Flapjack]

Self righteous. Hypocritical, with some long pointy fingers.

This^^^