Falsely accused by ugly female colleague of inappropriate staring

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Jenesis

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Hating women is something I have a hard time getting my head around but definitely exists. I can see being angry with an individual woman as you can be with a man but to just be angry with all women is so counterproductive if you are a heterosexual and want some action.
It is just like women who hate men.

Think of it more like a resentment. Both feel the need for the other in some way and hate the fact that the other side has the control.

So for him, it could be he needs women for sex and resents all women for the pussy power he believes that have. That then morphs to co-worker being an ugly bitch with no real experience in his eyes. We don’t know her side of the story and it could be vastly different from his because he is not quite living in reality but in the resentments he has made against women.

This is speculation. I have no idea if it is true. It is just and example.
 

squeezer

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The comment you made that I was replying too wasn't about negative though, it was about angry. Angry is far more dangerous, how many of the mass shooters have been incels? Something like 75% of women murdered in Canada is labeled a femicide (decided as such because of an intimate or familiar relationship, or the woman being a sex worker, and the perp was a man) whereas men were mostly killed by friends or acquaintance. Anger and similar emotions was considered a driving factor in femicide 3x more often than non-gender related murders etc.

So I'm personally not into comparing negative women to angry men..
I get it but constant negativity leads to anger. Men in general can be more violent when angry as opposed to nagging and complaining so I get why you would fear an angry man more. Although I don't think it's many, I think it is the few making the rest look bad.
 
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Vera.Reis

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I get it but constant negativity leads to anger. Men in general can be more violent when angry as opposed to nagging and complaining so I get why you would fear an angry man more. Although I don't think it's many, I think it is the few making the rest look bad.
Absolutely, give that it's more or less 180 femicides a year, it's an extremely small pool of men. My fear is of the ideology that breeds this type of hatred towards women that they are murdered simply for being women.

I'm not afraid of a man trying to hit me, I'm an ex rugby player, as well as a few years of wrestling, and I work out 4-6x/week. At the very least I can get a man on the ground and that will hopefully give me time to get away. Even if it doesn't, I'll survive a beating, but an ideology that not only increases the chances that a man will try to beat me or rape me, but one that increases the chances he won't stop at just a beating or rape, that is even scarier and what is brewing with the incels.
 

gollumtroll

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gollumtroll

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This person is LGBTQIA2S+ IMO, she has 6-color rainbow sticker on her cellphone, and her emails include gender pronouns.
I have had my dealings with "they" and them. Very difficult to win those battles. The "deck is loaded".
 

gollumtroll

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She got really upset and as she was passing by me to get to the door, I instinctively put my hands gently on each of her shoulders.
 

Vera.Reis

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It's so funny seeing this because it's like OMG YOU WERE SO CLOSE!!!

Unwanted attention and repeated attempts at forcing that unwanted attention on someone is harassment :)

Just like you do not have to find someone attractive, neither do we, and the problem is men are the ones most often forcing their attention on someone who doesn't want it. Boo hoo, not every woman has to entertain your nonsense my guy.
 

Jenesis

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It's so funny seeing this because it's like OMG YOU WERE SO CLOSE!!!

Unwanted attention and repeated attempts at forcing that unwanted attention on someone is harassment :)

Just like you do not have to find someone attractive, neither do we, and the problem is men are the ones most often forcing their attention on someone who doesn't want it. Boo hoo, not every woman has to entertain your nonsense my guy.
Can you imagine the uproar, if gay men hit on heterosexual men the way that heterosexual men hit on heterosexual women? I see law being changed, I see protest happening, I see a huge uproar, if gay men treated heterosexual men the same way that they treat us women
 

dvous11

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Can you imagine the uproar, if gay men hit on heterosexual men the way that heterosexual men hit on heterosexual women? I see law being changed, I see protest happening, I see a huge uproar, if gay men treated heterosexual men the same way that they treat us women
I used to get hit on by gay dudes at work a lot when I was younger.
I had a very simple response that always worked:
“If you wanna be my friend cool let’s be friends…if you wanna be gay, go be gay somewhere else.”
No one ever had to call HR and we all got along just fine.
 

dvous11

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It's so funny seeing this because it's like OMG YOU WERE SO CLOSE!!!

Unwanted attention and repeated attempts at forcing that unwanted attention on someone is harassment :)

Just like you do not have to find someone attractive, neither do we, and the problem is men are the ones most often forcing their attention on someone who doesn't want it. Boo hoo, not every woman has to entertain your nonsense my guy.
I think most hetero men would agree this photo depiction is accurate AF :)
 

massman

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Can you imagine the uproar, if gay men hit on heterosexual men the way that heterosexual men hit on heterosexual women? I see law being changed, I see protest happening, I see a huge uproar, if gay men treated heterosexual men the same way that they treat us women
I see your point, and I some sense you are right, but the dynamic of unwanted attention to a man from a gay man is different than that from a man to a woman (as I’m sure you are aware). I’ve been hit on more than once by gay dudes, and it never crossed my mind that unwanted attention could lead to threats to my safety. I just simply ignored it, or politely said “sorry, no offence but I’m not interested” then went about my day, forgetting about it.
 

Vera.Reis

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I used to get hit on by gay dudes at work a lot when I was younger.
I had a very simple response that always worked:
“If you wanna be my friend cool let’s be friends…if you wanna be gay, go be gay somewhere else.”
No one ever had to call HR and we all got along just fine.
Imagine thinking someone cannot be your friend and gay at the same time, but also given how many gay men use to be closeted in Canada and this is a "back in my day" story, I call bullshit.
 

Vera.Reis

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I think most hetero men would agree this photo depiction is accurate AF :)
It is accurate, the way it is interpreted is what I am drawing attention to. Some men interpret it as women only want attention from men they are attracted to and this is bad and unfair to the men they are not attracted to. I interpret it as women only want attention from men they are attracted to, and this is human nature, but the men they are not attracted to feel like they are entitled to still harass her anyway.
 

dvous11

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Imagine thinking someone cannot be your friend and gay at the same time, but also given how many gay men use to be closeted in Canada and this is a "back in my day" story, I call bullshit.
You can call whatever you like doesn’t mean you’re accurate. You have a social justice warrior perspective on this…it just meant I’m not gay stop hitting on me and we are cool.
 

Vera.Reis

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Can you imagine the uproar, if gay men hit on heterosexual men the way that heterosexual men hit on heterosexual women? I see law being changed, I see protest happening, I see a huge uproar, if gay men treated heterosexual men the same way that they treat us women
I say this all the time, homophobic men are in part worried that gay men will treat them the way that straight men treat women. Why are straight men allowed to tell gay men to kick rocks, AGGRESSIVELY, but the second we tell these men we are not interested even in the kindest way, we are a bitch, a cunt, fat, a whore etc etc etc if we say it in the way that they say it to gay men, we are literally putting ourselves in danger. So because women are scared of turning down men, as we have all experienced aggression when doing this, we take their repeated attempts at hitting on us at work, even though we've maneuvered around it or durned it down, as a sign that things might escalate and it makes us uncomfortable, but how dare we feel like that, it doesn't matter that we have these lived experiences, because now the unwanted men can't harass us lamo
 
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Vera.Reis

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You can call whatever you like doesn’t mean you’re accurate. You have a social justice warrior perspective on this…it just meant I’m not gay stop hitting on me and we are cool.
I can't take anyone serious who thinks social justice is a bad thing, imagine telling everyone you do not think people should be treat in a just way lol ok boomer
 

Valcazar

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Hating women is something I have a hard time getting my head around but definitely exists. I can see being angry with an individual woman as you can be with a man but to just be angry with all women is so counterproductive if you are a heterosexual and want some action.
It's really fucking common, though.
I like to think less so than when I was a kid, but it feels like it is a lot more common than when I was in my 20s/30s.

There are men who just channel that frustration into the whole category.
 
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