Well said .. Hit in on the nail ..
One quick story .. Recently stoped @ a Pizza Joint .. Noticed a 'homeless' person sitting by the window .. Offered to buy him a slice of Pizza and he went off @ me .. Apologized if I misread the situation cuz he was getting a bit too vocal for my liking .. Either way .. Didn't put too much thought into the matter .. Tried to help and he refused so I just left it @ that.
So weird. If someone mistook me for needing assistance, my first reaction would be embarrassment, not anger.
The one and only time I gave money to a homeless person (I grew up in an area that simply didn't have any) was in my early 20s when visiting Toronto. Guy asked if I could spare $5. I had $5 and change in my pocket, so the timing was unique, and I decided why not. So I gave him the $5. He then said "actually, do you think you could spare some more?" When I said that's all I have, he said "Really, come on man, you've got more, I know you do. You know what, prove you don't have more." Which really pissed me off. I told him I don't have to prove anything to him, he's the one asking for help. I could have $200 in my pocket and he's not entitled to a cent of it. At which point he called me a greedy motherfucker. That was my only experience ever giving money to a homeless person, and I resolved never to do so again. I don't mind donating to organizations that help the homeless, but directly giving them money is off the docket.
Most of the time when I get asked in passing I merely respond with a "sorry, no" and it's left at that. Sometimes there is grumbling, but usually that's as far as it goes.
But I do recall walking down a sidestreet downtown Toronto and hearing a girl get accosted by a guy in a wheelchair begging for money, wheeling along after her closely and going on about his story of crippled legs and not being able to find work or eat. She politely declined, and the guy went off on a rant about how he's treated like shit because he's disabled and that she's part of the problem, yada yada. The guy even poked at her with the cane he had; I mean it legit looked like he was trying to hit her with it, but she stayed out of reach. Girl ran off all red-faced. Disabled guy sniggered and called her "what a cunt", before moving on to his next victim, which was a lady parked in her van. He rapped on her passenger side window and she rolled it down. He started the same spiel, and wouldn't she please be an angel and help him out. I could see the sympathy in her eyes, so I spoke up and said this guy doesn't deserve any of your pity, or hard-earned money. Boy, did that piss him off! The string of curses and threats he leveled at me were quite something. I carried on my way without breaking stride, van lady drove off, and the guy was left there in both our wakes.