Seems logical, but a gross oversimplification. Keep in mind that at least half of the guys here are married/ attached.
Married Hobbying
- Thread starter FunInToronto2023
- Start date
My ex (wife at the time) was fine with my getting RMT massages at a health club to which we both belonged. She knew they were totally legit.
She was not happy when a friend of hers saw me going into "Just Relax", a semi-legit spa, and "ratted" on me, as my wife (at the time) assumed I was at getting at least a bj there (which wasn't the case).
That despite our not having had sex for years...
What would you possibly have to gain by telling your wife about your extra-curricular adventures?
It is not just your wife who will know. It’s your parents, kids. co-workers, friends. She won’t keep the secret. She will use it to paint you in the worst light.
Thank you I can’t stop I’m addicted. MPs are nothing compared to the small army of SPs and SB’s I’ve seen. I’m legit crazy or some level of addicted narcissist (but a very nice caring person). I was thinking maybe with permission it wouldn’t be as big of a deal.
That sucks you got ratted. I’m still surprised I wasn’t when I started all this behaviour with dating on Tinder.
I only behave like I do after years of almost no sex. It’s not a good defence but is my reason and has progressively peaked to multiple girls over successive days in my car, at spas, their apartments and homes, hotels and some pretty high risk places.
Thinking that maybe permission to see MPs would keep everything in check.
Tell her straight up, but record it and post it on Tik Tok. Then walk out the door and say you're going for a massage. Make sure to keep recording though. kthxbye 
Pretty much this XD I know someone who went off on their ex because of something online and she basically went around telling people and showing pics. And they are pretty much back together again...and the people who know like me we generally don't care. This was online stuff solely.
He might be able find a way to monetize off that video, to then pay off some of the fees he will incur afterwards.Tell her straight up, but record it and post it on Tik Tok. Then walk out the door and say you're going for a massage. Make sure to keep recording though. kthxbye
After years of almost no sex with your SO I believe you're entitled to seek sexual satisfaction and physical intimacy elsewhere.
Believe me I felt no guilt at all.
But getting "permission" from your SO will likely blow up in your face, and if you're used to SP's and SB's, etc., etc., seeing only MP's will probably not be sufficient to satisfy your needs.
You've gotten away with it so far, and it seems on a grand scale. Just keep doing what you're doing, like 99% of the rest of us here do, and keep it on the "down low"...
Or instead of just telling her I'd say surprise her and take her to the MP with you. When you guys walk in say you're here for the happy ending, but with a twist of course. Call it a "M. Night special"
Your sexual appetite has nothing to do with you as a person. Remind yourself of that. You’re looking to tame the sexual beast inside of you. I think most of us are here because of that issue. It’s a difficult situation mentally, because you don’t want to hurt anyone. You genuinely care, but your decisions are selfish. The gratification one gets from the ladies makes it difficult to let go . It’s the reoccurring battle of good and evil. Remember it’s just sex, take some time away. Distract yourself and find other things that make you feel good about yourself. Like anything else, the more you feed it the bigger it grows. Hope you can find your peace, feel free to PM, anytime.
As someone who was married with her for a few years I still don't understand why some ladies slow down or stop putting out. I know near the end of my marriage I was hardly getting much or only when she was in the mood. We ended it for other reasons, but it was pretty much getting to the point it was going to end.
Your sexual appetite is what you want to control and both men and women can have that issue. No different than people being addicted to drugs, booze and whatever else. Self control doesn't come easy for everyone. I'm pretty good at it and I know a few people who struggle. Overall if I'm hardly getting any action each month from a partner it eventually becomes an issue. Going to a MP and keeping it down low because you still enjoy your SO company has been happening for years. For some it's a moral issue since they are hiding it. Meh...
Thank you you’re probably right that it’s the best way to go. I’ve never had FS at an MP place but am already interested in finding an MP that will do that (but can’t talk about those details on here due to community rules)
That would actually be pretty funOr instead of just telling her I'd say surprise her and take her to the MP with you. When you guys walk in say you're here for the happy ending, but with a twist of course. Call it a "M. Night special"
That is really excellent feedback and I’ll message you later. You’re right on all counts and the addiction leads to terrible decision making and I would never want to hurt my SO or anyone else. And to your point, I’ve really hurt myself with this addiction and taking time off would definitely help. Thank you!
If you feel you are addicted, 1) permission to continue your addiction is not at all helpful, it is only enabling. 2) you are kidding yourself if you think you will be able to just stick to MPs. Guarantee you will escalate right back up to FS activities.
Either way, telling your SO/ asking for permission is not helpful and actually is a selfish to assuage your guilt, not to benefit or show more respect to her.
Telling your wife that you want to see MP's is probably the worst decision you can make unless your a swinging couple and your wife is ok with you being with another women. Most wives are not ok with their husband going to see an MP and having a naked women rub herself against you and jerk you off. If the guilt sets in then take a break and try your best to be loyal to your wife.
