Yeahh. Part of a provider's job is to sell you the fantasy from the moment they greet you to the moment they're out of your line of sight and out the door. It's up to you as a client to self regulate boundaries knowing that it is a service you hired and paid for. It's incredibly unfair to put that kind of expectation on a provider given that this is their job.Hmmm. Yup, very true. I guess I just assumed the escort would think of me as a friend the exact same way as I do. I mean in a sense that she pretends we only ever met in the civi world. I definitely see the issue with my logic. Im
Slow, damn
Is it possible for a provider to develop feelings for a client?
- Thread starter massage_toronto
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So true. And check out my signature below...says it all. Hence my surprise at that one time interaction by a lady to escalate. (Although I had a regular who we'd go have lunch after and she never charged any time but of course the meal was my shout). But as I indicate below - don't ask if it's real, only ask if you were entertained. And leave it at that.
Itās all about money, mate. If youāve got it, you can have any girl you want.
āSuccessful men are rare, beautiful girls are everywhere.ā
Because it ruins the fantasy. And you're risking losing a client.
As a client, you are used to providers showing up as the best versions of themselves. It's the girlfriend experience minus any of the unpleasantries. It becomes mental gymnastics when you have to juggle that with the "friend" version of a client and instead of compartmentalizing, you're constantly analyzing how you should show up. Many clients can't handle that dichotomous reality. Such as yourself if I'm being honest, reading how you reply in most of your messages.
Ex: Are you actually being a true "friend"? What does being a friend mean to you? Because if a provider can't be their true selves around their "friend", why would they want to sustain that? Why would they want to perform or give the best versions of themselves that is performance, and takes a lot of work, for a "friend"? You should ask yourself if you're even capable of that.
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That's simply untrue. Some women actually care about a man's character and how that will impact their relationship.
Sure, you can attract a beautiful woman if you're a rich man, but if you're unpleasant, who would want to stick around you? Unless they're just in it for the money or for other self destructive reasons. And that's more of a reflection on you if you're okay with that.
However, OP was specifically inquiring about if a provider would actually fall in love for a man for HIM. Not his money.
Yes I am specifically telling him it all about money!! And Mate, those girls who care about character wonāt ride you like this or have you seeing stars with how they treat your junior.
Letās be real the more you act like you donāt care, the more they chase. Keep playing the nice guy and youāll stay stuck. āUnpleasantā? Not sure why you used that word. Trust me, no one here is unpleasant ā 90% of the guys are chill, funny, and good vibes.
Many reasons. Not everyone is trustworthy, and sometimes guys don't understand how something could compromise our safety and anonymity. I've become friends with a client who was still actively seeing providers and I didn't know that. He told other providers certain things about me, that I didn't want them to know.. he didn't have bad intentions but it still made me question things.
I don't want to become someone's friend only to find out later that he's mentioning things I told him on review boards. I already think it's weird and unpleasant when clients mention me without naming me on threads, on forums like Merb. They may not realize it but a lot of people will end up asking them who they're talking about, or they will figure it out.
Also if I had an argument with a client I became friends with, certain things could really go wrong.. sometimes it's really hard to forget that somebody was your client..
None of this is true.. also no nice guy would say something like "girls who care about character won't ride you like this" or "the more you act like you don't care the more they chase" lol this is so disrespectful, honestly.
Nice - actively spreading misogyny and toxic unhealthy relationship dynamics.
How does it feel to be encouraging people to take on incel mentalities?
That isn't why friendship is risky in my opinion. I have plenty of clients.. I can afford turning one person I get along with really well into a ''real friend'' (someone who knows my real identity and who I can fully be myself around), and if I decide I like someone enough to be his friend outside of this, I will not charge him to hang out, because it would be weird..
But you're on to something.. If I have seen a client many times, does he know the real me? He knows a certain version of me. That's part of why changing the client-provider dynamic into a romantic relationship or a friendship is dangerous.. I've only become friends with clients a handful of times. One person is still a really close friend, we had only seen each other once. Another client, I've seen twice.. And he told me he wanted to stop seeing sex workers. I naively believed him.. Since he's not from Montreal, I didn't think being his friend would be an issue.. He's a really good person and I don't regret being his friend, but there has been a couple times when I was worried he would reveal things about me to other providers, or on boards.
There is a client I saw a couple of times. I told him I felt like I got along with him very well and wanted to be his friend, I gave him my real identity. He ghosted me and I was really wondering why.. I found out he felt ''friend zoned'' by me. I was really weirded out by this, because so many clients would die to get close to the ''real me'', and I gave him this real opportunity, but it turns out he would have preferred to keep seeing Luna.. He wanted to be able to keep having sex with me as well, which is strange because there are so many other girls to choose from. This made me really sad, and made me understand a lot of things about this industry, tbh. That's why I don't want to do this anymore. A lot of men on the internet laugh when I say this, but what I'm offering as a provider is connection, a lot more than sex. Sometimes it's really hard to prevent blurred lines.. I want to keep my professional life and my personal life completely separate at this point
I just want to give everyone this advice: if you want to get to know a provider better or get closer to her, book her for longer periods of time, book social dates, book her more often. Don't expect anything outside of this.
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Iāve been seeing a regular for the past 19 yearsā¦ I realize thatās a bit out of the norm because providers come and go. Sheās a great girl and we always have a good time together. Iāve found that over the years the barriers have come down, so we talk about more personal things simply because weāve known one another for so long.
Sheās been officially out of the industry for a long time, married with kids etc, but she continues to see me regardless. Iād say weāve formed a very nice business friendship over the years. We obviously like one another as people and itās usually just a text like hey, do you want to hang out for a bit? When we make arrangements to meet. At the heart of it, itās a symbiotic relationship which has outlasted all of my civilization ones! lol I get what I want, and she gets what she wants. Itās just some harmless fun all the way around.
However, Iāve never once thought of it being anymore than what it is. In my 25 years plus as a hobbyist, Iāve only heard of real relationships forming between a client and provider a handful of times. Weāre all human of course, but just remain cognizant of the environment in which the interaction started before you get too carried away. Put it to you like this, you might really enjoy talking to your plumberā¦ Hell, you might even invite him over for a beer and a bbq while you watch the game if youāve gotten chummy. Just remember thoughā¦ heāll still charge you to fix your toilet!
Sheās been officially out of the industry for a long time, married with kids etc, but she continues to see me regardless. Iād say weāve formed a very nice business friendship over the years. We obviously like one another as people and itās usually just a text like hey, do you want to hang out for a bit? When we make arrangements to meet. At the heart of it, itās a symbiotic relationship which has outlasted all of my civilization ones! lol I get what I want, and she gets what she wants. Itās just some harmless fun all the way around.
However, Iāve never once thought of it being anymore than what it is. In my 25 years plus as a hobbyist, Iāve only heard of real relationships forming between a client and provider a handful of times. Weāre all human of course, but just remain cognizant of the environment in which the interaction started before you get too carried away. Put it to you like this, you might really enjoy talking to your plumberā¦ Hell, you might even invite him over for a beer and a bbq while you watch the game if youāve gotten chummy. Just remember thoughā¦ heāll still charge you to fix your toilet!
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I think I know the answers, but:
Do you pay for her time?
If so, has she raised her rates for you in recent years, and does she watch the clock?
Just asking for a friend lol...
I believe ābusiness friendshipā says it all, but thatās just my guess.
Btw, I think thatās a pretty good term to encapsulate one subset of good outcomes to this hobby.
I commend the poster for such a lasting relationship.
Yes, we keep things professional in that regard. She has not changed her pricing since I started seeing her. Rather, I gave her a raise on my own accord. Itās not really a money thing for her, as she said. After all, she has a stable civilian career and her husband works as well. Sheās not a clock watcher, though.
YOU NEED TO CALM DOWN SIR
