Good Pun Fun
- Thread starter great bear
- Start date
Sergei said:
Yes, but only if you don't say it in one of Canada's official languages ( either punjabi or mandarin)
Are you trying to end up in jail or what??!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!LancsLad said:Yes, but only if you don't say it in one of Canada's official languages ( either punjabi or mandarin)
Sergei said:
Just wondering where all the do gooder PC panty waste crowd are hiding. Trying to draw them out.
Two muffins are baking in the oven.
The first muffin turns, looks at the other one, and says "Geeze, getting hot in here..."
The second muffin looks back and says "Holy Sh_t! A talking muffin!"
The first muffin turns, looks at the other one, and says "Geeze, getting hot in here..."
The second muffin looks back and says "Holy Sh_t! A talking muffin!"
Sherlock Holmes and Watson are swallowed by a whale. Watson cries, eh Gad sir where are we.
Holmes replies ; " Alimentary, my dear Watson"
.
Holmes replies ; " Alimentary, my dear Watson"
.
Can you believe this - I was once called a "reverse racist" by a (former) friend from Caledon for saying that I liked the Chinese. Maybe I should send you the guy's number - you can go have a beer with him and watch his face turn more red with every word you say......... It's kind of fun! He's stopped talking to me though........ I didn't like everybody equally, you see........LancsLad said:Just wondering where all the do gooder PC panty waste crowd are hiding. Trying to draw them out.
A guy works in a blood donor clinic. After work he goes to a massage parlour. He recognizes the attendant as someone who had given blood earlier that day, so he says to her "Wow, this sure is ironic. Earlier today, I was pricking your finger.".
A Greek goes to a tailor with a torn coat. The tailor asked, "Euripedis"? and he replied "Eumenides"?
Ok, I know not a pun but funny anyway....
A man and a woman who had never met before, and were both married to other people, found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a Trans-continental train. Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly..... He in the upper bunk and she in the lower.
At 1:00 AM, the man leaned down and gently woke the woman saying, "Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold."
"I have a better idea," she replied . "Just for tonight, let 's pretend that we're married."
"Wow! That's a great idea!" he exclaimed.
"Good," she replied. "Get your own fuckin blanket."
After a moment of silence, he farted.
A man and a woman who had never met before, and were both married to other people, found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a Trans-continental train. Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly..... He in the upper bunk and she in the lower.
At 1:00 AM, the man leaned down and gently woke the woman saying, "Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold."
"I have a better idea," she replied . "Just for tonight, let 's pretend that we're married."
"Wow! That's a great idea!" he exclaimed.
"Good," she replied. "Get your own fuckin blanket."
After a moment of silence, he farted.
ok
That one was good.
I laughed.
Two lesbian polar bears walk into a klondike bar.
Cashanova said:
That one was good.
I laughed.
Two lesbian polar bears walk into a klondike bar.
From Emo Phillips:
I was sitting in a movie theatre, and a man came over to me and said "Excuse me, is this seat saved?". So I told him, "If Aquinas ascertained that an animal has no soul, what less chance would an inanimate object, such as a chair, have of attaining salvation?".
I was sitting in a movie theatre, and a man came over to me and said "Excuse me, is this seat saved?". So I told him, "If Aquinas ascertained that an animal has no soul, what less chance would an inanimate object, such as a chair, have of attaining salvation?".
