Do all Sp's feel this way?

[moviefan]

Hinz is right.

Moviefan - let me be a contrarian for the moment. You say your OK with it. You don't feel like a big loser with a capital "L" on your forehead for having to pay for it knowing the girl wouldn't be with you in a 1000 years if money were not involved?

petitelover, I understand where you're coming from, but it doesn't really reflect my thinking.

I look at it this way -- spending quality time with an attractive woman who otherwise might not be with me in a thousand years is something I feel good about. I'm getting the opportunity to indulge in a fantasy situation and I know the payoff will be a sure thing.

The fact I had to pay for that time doesn't bother me, as every other customer who sees that same SP also has to pay for it. I'm not being treated any different than anyone else, so why should I feel like a loser?

(As an aside, there are legitimate reasons I could feel like a loser, but that's not one of them).

 

[buttman*]

I look at it this way -- spending quality time with an attractive woman who otherwise might not be with me in a thousand years is something I feel good about. I'm getting the opportunity to indulge in a fantasy situation and I know the payoff will be a sure thing.

(As an aside, there are legitimate reasons I could feel like a loser, but that's not one of them).

well put

 

[nottyboi]

There's actually a lot of money to be made in the gay-for-pay business. Just sayin'

I suppose one could fake receiving, but I dunno how to fake pitching...

 

[genintoronto]

I suppose one could fake receiving, but I dunno how to fake pitching...

The market is mostly into receivers.

 

[bogo]

I try to be a positive aspect of an SP's day. I know I don't satisfy them all the time, but if i detect one is faking it I will not go back. Life is too short not to make some kind of real connection with every one I meet. The physical aspect of the act is a small part of it for me, I used to be very involved in the lifestyle, got laid a lot. Today I find work is a killer , can barely keep old friends in the schedule let alone a girl friend so I pay for the ever so brief passion that is intimacy.

 

[Mongrel4u]

I always find it interesting that guys bring up the money aspect of the job all the time.

Because there are many guys out there who fool themselves into beleiving that the girls just "love" to be with them and the money is just a perk

 

[james t kirk]

I dunno....

I've only seen one SP in the last 2 years and I truly believe that she and I have a rapour together. I feel I'm a pretty good judge of character and I don't get the feeling that she despises me, or is simply acting the part when we get together. Yeah, there's money involved, that's part of the understanding, however, our relationship is more than just business.

In her case, she knows a gread deal about me, and I know a great deal about her and I truly do respect her.

When we do get together, we usually just talk about life, friends, family, work, etc. After the main event, I certainly don't want her to leave. She's more than welcome to spend the night and the morning if she wanted to. I would be quite willing to date her, introduce her to my friends, or even just hang out as buds. (The topic of the nature of our initial meeting need never be discussed with anyone as it's between her and I.)

I know there will come a time when she retires from the industry and I understand that it's not something a woman can do forever. (The SP I am thinking of has a lot going for her, so she has many options.) She once quoted a show about a call girl on Showcase that she felt reflected her attitude about her side job, "I don't do drugs, I'm not an alcoholic, I love sex, and I love money"

I can handle that.

I'd be very disappointed if I found out that she viewed me like the Original Poster's SP viewed her clients.

I know I actually hold her in pretty high regard.

 

[tired old perv]

The only time you really know they like you, is when its off the clock time.

If your paying for the time, your just a means too an end. But if you pay for an hour and get 5 free hours, its because they enjoy being with you irreagardless of the money.

 

[C Dick]

Does my dental hygienest like cleaning my teeth ?

A friend of our family is a dental hygienest (?), and she loves it. You just have to ask about it, and she starts going on about how she loves seeing the plaque flying off, how shiny the teeth get, etc. I really believe that there are some SPs that love it. Certainly I know some SPs who were fucking every guy they could get their hands on well before they were getting paid for it.

 

[mildandlazy]

Different strokes for different folks

Interesting thread.
I would say that Sex workers in general have about the same attitude as most people. 80% of employees don't like their jobs.

Some love their jobs and were born to do it. A movie was made in England in the or 90s about a real life English Madam (I wish I could remember the title). When she was 14, she was as mature as any woman past 20. She wanted to have sex, but the boys her age and older were of little interest, mostly due to immaturity. One older fella, about 40 I would say, took a shine to her and she to him. He was just a means to an end for her. She wanted adult sex and he was willing to take the obvious risk. Her relaxed sexual attitude was natural to her. She couldn't understand why everyone got so hung up about a simple need. She carried it forward into her adult life and became a madam of an S&M parlour.

 

[LordLoki]

The only time you really know they like you, is when its off the clock time.

If your paying for the time, your just a means too an end. But if you pay for an hour and get 5 free hours, its because they enjoy being with you irreagardless of the money.

Agreed.

And when she stop charging you at all you know it has gone beyond "enjoy being with you" to somthing a lot more emotional.

And if you get a life long refund, you have entered the born again non-client catagory.

 

[serviceman]

Go see some SPs and write some reviuews!

ok there Mr i have over 1000 posts, i'll get a review in eventually. I need more research to make a worthwhile review

 

[Jade4u]

Being retired why the hell am I still posting on terb? That should say something. There obviously is men that I hated to see and would NOT see them again. If you do not wish to see them in my opinion then "don't" see them.

There is also the men that you could care less to see them back or not and it really did not matter, those are the ones I guess you could say you accepted yes for the money. A tad annoying but not over bearing that you could not handle them and keep thier sneekiness in control, but other wise harmless. Thank goodness for the mirrors I had surrounding me front and back on my bed. :-D Busted buster. ha ha Yes, some men do try to sneek the condoms off and play dumb about it and say it slid while they were adjusting it, but it happens with the same men and..... Once done though you have to have a sense of humour about things and laugh at different experiences and if you don't then I guess you can say it would get to you. Men do often try to go beyond your rules and you have to know how to deal with things yes in a sneeky way. ie.. no kissing and how they forget because they do not go back to your web page all the time and forget what girls have what rules. I guess this could be true for some men.

Then there is your average man that you totally respect, but no sense of humour and you are always happy to see them but they are obviously there to be down for business and nothing more or similar. Maybe they do like to chat and have a drink first to socialize or whatever but nothing too much appealing about them but none the less are always pleasant and considerate. On many different scales but none the less never a problem in dealing with and kind or simply straight forward in personality.

Then there is those men that have really made my career very exciting. This too could be for a number of reasons. They are overy happy and always smiling and give hugs before and after or they sit and talk and really get to know you without being nosy or overbearing. They could become really good friends and really show they care. I still chat till now with men that are like this from being in this business. They truly care about you and all the girls in this business and have many ways of showing it.

I say if you hate this career then stop operating in a way that you do not like and simply stop seeing the real undesirables if you cannot handle it and/or change other things that you think are bringing you the undesirable things that you do not like. Your menu should truly represent what you like and your rules to go along with it.

Men do not nag a woman about what is on her menu and say you should include this or that. If she has said for example no daty or kissing it is possible that she has reasons why she does not do it.

OK want truth guys I never have enjoyed daty and still don't. sooooo haaaaa I am serious I don't know I just don't see much in it. OK so now you CAN I guess call me strange as you guys assumed because it was not on my menu. Kissing ok that I do reserve for a man I am with. Anyhow I had fun. I was always happy to meet different people. I enjoyed joking with those that appeared they liked to joke and enjoyed having men stay longer just to sit and chat if they had the time after.

I prefer to remember the good times. I would say most guys do fit into the last two descriptions.

 

[nottyboi]

They truly care about you and all the girls in this business and have many ways of showing it.

You know Jade, before I started in seeing SP's I never thought I could actually "care" about someone who I paid to have sex with. But there have been a couple of SP's that I am really fond of and whose company I genuinely enjoy. I think I could actually spend time with some girls with NO SEX and still have a good time. (of course with sex is better lol). Some women are just , well, wonderful women. Some men look at SP's as whores who are to be disrepected. But I see SPs and clients at the exact same level of morality (whatever one thinks that is). I think being a good SP brings positive karma as one is giving a fellow human being a great deal of pleasure.

 

[mildandlazy]

OK want truth guys I never have enjoyed daty and still don't. sooooo haaaaa

Jade4u,

Thanks you for your thoughts on this.

I once hired a lady who happened to live a few doors down from me. I paid her for an hour. I watched as the clock ticked over to an hour and 45 minutes. I quit because I just got too tired.

If she hated her job, I think she would have been a tad more punctual.

 

[james t kirk]

But I see SPs and clients at the exact same level of morality (whatever one thinks that is).

EXACTLY.

I find it kind of rich if either party gets all judgemental and feels superior to the other. (Pot meet kettle.)

 

[futurelegend]

I think that if you develop a strong enough bond with one or two particular girls, (as JTK mentioned) it becomes more believable that they might be actually enjoying themselves and then you feel better for parting ways with your cash. If you had just a gf, you would likely spend money on her anyway, with only a hope of the same result. The problem is that they also come with added pressures and expectations, which just aren't realistic for some men.

I don't believe that there are any women out there in the industry that HATE or even dislike sex, or they just wouldn't be doing it....regardless of how much money they were making. I think that it would be specific situations and clients that the ladies wouldn't enjoy. I love my job and most of my clients, but the a-holes that I do run into occasionally really piss me off and make my job difficult. I totally agree with Jade's comment that if you don't like a guy, just don't see him...if you don't like doing a certain thing, just don't offer it.

I would, however, like to pose a question to any ladies that are reading this thread that are SPs or have been in the past...

If you had one of those clients that was respectful, genuine, fun to be with and you considered a friend, would you go with them for lunch or dinner before (or after) your appointment, "off the clock"? There would be no expectations of it being a date or any kind of relationship, but merely an opportunity to talk and get to know each other better, on a personal level, without feeling like you were being rushed to "get down to business". Or to keep the relationship 'professional' is this something that has to be paid for and generally frowned upon?

 

[petitelover]

I posted this in the incall section to another thread started by someone else but thought it applicable here.

Wow, I guess my 1000th post is going to be memorable.

Thanks to all who posted - a lot of good insight.

With some, I agree - others, I disagree.

Some have posted that they are paid to be there and should perform. That may be true but I think a lot of SP's get jaded and despise the biz because of the way guys treat them. Most people remember the bad things and not the good so if an SP sees 10 guys and 9 are nice but the 10th is an ass hole, that is the one she is going to remember.

I ask you this. Those that have had the opportunity to meet and pick up a girl at a bar or restaurant or wherever, how does it make you feel in comparison to simply calling a SP? For me, the real thrill is knowing the girl wants to be with you for you and not for money. That is the ultimate turn on.

My buddy saw a couple of SP's recently and he tried to tell me how much he turned them on. I let it go and didn't want to burst his bubble but how does he really know? It's an illusion, plain and simple. I have become friends with many SP's and each one has told me they do it for money and not only do they hate the guys they see with a passion, they have contempt for men. I am sure many SP's think otherwise but that has been my experience.

Again, just a discussion point.

 

[petitelover]

Doc is right - time is money for these girls. That's the problem.

 

[buttman*]

If you are seeing her during time that she is scheduled to work, you are potentially costing her money.

OPPORTUNITY COST - basic economics