All you single guys getting up there in age, whats your future marriage plans?
- Thread starter BloweyJoey
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In my late 50s now. My friends & family have standing instructions to hit me with a blunt object if I start talking about marrying anyone. There's actually no danger of that at all, I have zero interest in dating, or complicating my life to the point I have to check in with anyone about anything. I simply don't understand people who are afraid to be alone.
I would say that people with strengths and competence take on the responsibilities that they are best suited for versus the partner who has no experience. Im not saying that one person rules all. even a first mate will give his captain his advice, opinion and experience about the ship; however, the overall operation of the ship and its safety falls on the captain. if shit happens hes going to be held to a different level of responsibility then a first mate.
if one person is way more qualified then wouldnt it make sense for that person to make the decisions. why would I ask my partner about investing when she has no interest or understanding of it. she may speak her 2 cents but at the same time her suggestions could financially doom our lifestyle if its a shared decision. there would have to be compromise, would there not. ifs it a bad move financially why would I agree to something so foolish.
that being said Ive been way more qualified when it comes to many matter in a relationship then my partners. they have their skill sets and I utilize their skills. I listen to them and make a decision and they follow through with what needs to be done. if they are not interested in my leadership they can walk out the door.
Different interests, ideas and approaches are a good thing. But if values are not aligned, then it is hard to make it work.
Recently wifey broke the rear tail light on the car. After watching a vid on Youtube I replaced the tail light in 3 minutes.
Also someone needs to open jars or kill a spider or do the taxes or ...
Yup, replacing taps, light switches, moving furniture, hauling shit for the garden centre, digging, shovelling.......
She gets it. And asks politely and says thank you.
2 things from William Cobbett's book Advice to young men and incidentally young women which I read quite a few years old.
1: Looks matter. they don't stay but as your wife gets old, your memories of how she looked younger remain and are important. I guess that is why with old happy couples the dude says his wife looks just as good as when they were married. I always figured that was bullshit, maybe not. Also those looks will motivate you to get past the rough times.
2: One time he had to go away IIRC this was before he was married. He left chicky a sizeable amount of money [he was an enlisted man at the time] with the expectation that she could keep herself in reasonable comfort and not work while he was away. He came back, turns out she worked [washerwoman?] and saved and either didn't touch the money or added to it. Also from memory, he was disapointed that she had to suffer instead of spend the money, OTOH you know you have a keeper if you get a chicky who would do that.
I don't think there are many of those either today or 200 years ago.
1: Looks matter. they don't stay but as your wife gets old, your memories of how she looked younger remain and are important. I guess that is why with old happy couples the dude says his wife looks just as good as when they were married. I always figured that was bullshit, maybe not. Also those looks will motivate you to get past the rough times.
2: One time he had to go away IIRC this was before he was married. He left chicky a sizeable amount of money [he was an enlisted man at the time] with the expectation that she could keep herself in reasonable comfort and not work while he was away. He came back, turns out she worked [washerwoman?] and saved and either didn't touch the money or added to it. Also from memory, he was disapointed that she had to suffer instead of spend the money, OTOH you know you have a keeper if you get a chicky who would do that.
I don't think there are many of those either today or 200 years ago.
I actually enjoy hauling dirt from the garden centre then putting it on the ground. I find it therapeutic.
Yup...it`s critical for men to accept and understand your last sentence. The fundamental female imperative is survival.. for her and her children. Putting it bluntly, in nature, she is the breeding machine. A man`s imperative is winning, don`t ever forget it. Men will at best be tolerated and more likely viewed as a disposable utility. Be honest with yourself, that`s probably what has happened in any man`s married with kids or g/f with kids experience. No need to hate women or slag `em, just understand them and act in your best interest. That`s that.
that's exactly what one of my friends found therapeutic! He has hauled a lot of dirt into his backyard. It was right after his mother in law mysteriously disappeared so I guess he needed some therapeutic activity
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gentlemen, we are resources providers. they are sex objects. this is at the primal level and will always unconsciously be what is sought out.
my issue with relationships is why do I have to equitably split half of the empire I built to someone who never earned or built it.
my issue with relationships is why do I have to equitably split half of the empire I built to someone who never earned or built it.
"if you can find a woman that isn`t a fucking disaster, you`ve located a unicorn that farts glitter. "
Pure gold, thank you!
You're not marriage material until your divorce material.
Just state things up front
I want sex (unlimited)
No nagging, arguing
I make financial decisions (if that's what you want)
No excessive spending, drinking (if that's what you want)
No gambling fund
No debt
Only 3 girls night out per year (if that's what you want)
For me, No pets
Only 3 vacations per year
No luxury spending
If she's down,then it's all cool, you can date her.
Bonus, brings you hot girls as well to share.
I want sex (unlimited)
No nagging, arguing
I make financial decisions (if that's what you want)
No excessive spending, drinking (if that's what you want)
No gambling fund
No debt
Only 3 girls night out per year (if that's what you want)
For me, No pets
Only 3 vacations per year
No luxury spending
If she's down,then it's all cool, you can date her.
Bonus, brings you hot girls as well to share.
The Gov't doesn't want poor people on the street or working the streets. This causes broken home/ child and down the road Adult child commits crime. Gov't wants to prevent this.
taking half a mans shit will not change the outcome. its just a reallocation of wealth which is essentially almost a tax. kids are going to be fucked up regardless. the majority of men would have no problem providing for their child however once the divorce passes why should they pay alimony when they are no longer together. plus a system that sets unrealistic child support payment which most would consider an unreasonable amount to support a child, which I would say most of the time is used for other things beside children.
the breakdown of the family unit(legal divorce) is responsible for the problems. eliminate divorce and more than likely it would produce a less damaged child.
men having sexual reproductive rights and the option to financially abort or opt out from fatherhood would more than likely impact and lower the number of fatherless children because it is no longer a financial incentive. currently the legal system incentivizes women to get divorced, since 90% get custody of the kids and alimony.
