FYI to SP's

[vtech763]

Not sure if this the right section, but wanted to share thoughts.

I had two SP's message. Me yesterday and Friday.

Friday- I had messaged one Indy sp in the morning and got no response. Then, I got home, and received a response about 6 hours after my original message. Definitely not the smart thing to do.

Yesterday - I received a message from one Indy who I ad messaged inquiring about her services a couple of weeks ago. I then receive a message yesterday while I was at a family function. I have an SO and if she would have seen that, game over for me and my real life.

To all SP's, don't ver message someone out of the blue. You don't know who will be around him or who will grab that phone. I would say that a large number of customers have an SO and families which they don't want to be shattered by the "hobby". So unless you plan to respond within a few minutes, don't bother (unless told it would be ok to message later). And definitely don't message out of the blue when I would not be expecting.

Am I wrong? Please share your thoughts.

 

[peter4025]

I think you should get a hobby phone. Txt messages are not reliable all the time. Some times it takes a couple of days to be received. Next time make a phone call, use a hobby phone or an anonimous email

 

[sasemohan123]

Of course the SPs are dead wrong to send message to you.

Having said that, it is easy to overlook the time-stamp of the message, so she could have thought you JUST send her a message then answer you. If everybody had the same time-on/time-off it would be so easy to set an acceptable time period for communication for the "hobby" purpose for all, keep in mind that some of us hobby at night, weekend...rather than "office hour".

The best way to communicate through phone is getting a hobby phone, leave it off at the office, then you are probably 90% safe from privy eyes. It also give you an added layer of privacy: you can hide your real iidentity from the SPs too.

 

[MissCroft]

Having said that, it is easy to overlook the time-stamp of the message, so she could have thought you JUST send her a message then answer you.

That's a possibility. Someone sent me a text at approx. 10 pm a few weeks ago. I read it the next morning and mistakenly thought it had been sent at 10 am so I replied with what I thought was a very prompt response. I never heard back so don't know what he thought but it was an accident on my part.


I've also received texts late as well. A friend sent me a text recently and I didn't get it until several hours later.


But a text two weeks later is very inappropriate.

 

[Imperius]

Agree with the OP... should NEVER get messages (text or heaven forbid a phone call) out of the blue. Also they shouldn't leave a voice message unless you have given them the OK to do so.

Most experienced SPs seem to have pretty good practices around this issue, and state their contact policy on their ad or website.

Having a hobby phone could be a good idea, but if the second phone is found by family/SO, that could also cause big problems. (Anyone watch Breaking Bad? )

 

[sasemohan123]

Having a hobby phone could be a good idea, but if the second phone is found by family/SO, that could also cause big problems. (Anyone watch Breaking Bad? )

This is why it's wise to turn the H-phone off when not "in-need", leaving it at a most unlikely someone will find, maybe in the office, in the safe LOL.

 

[Garden of Eden Ladies]

Not sure if this the right section, but wanted to share thoughts.

I had two SP's message. Me yesterday and Friday.

Friday- I had messaged one Indy sp in the morning and got no response. Then, I got home, and received a response about 6 hours after my original message. Definitely not the smart thing to do.

Yesterday - I received a message from one Indy who I ad messaged inquiring about her services a couple of weeks ago. I then receive a message yesterday while I was at a family function. I have an SO and if she would have seen that, game over for me and my real life.

To all SP's, don't ver message someone out of the blue. You don't know who will be around him or who will grab that phone. I would say that a large number of customers have an SO and families which they don't want to be shattered by the "hobby". So unless you plan to respond within a few minutes, don't bother (unless told it would be ok to message later). And definitely don't message out of the blue when I would not be expecting.

Am I wrong? Please share your thoughts.

I think your wrong. You started by texting her first, which to me gives permission for her to respond back. If you needed her to respond in a certain amount of time then you should have made that clear in your first message. How is she supposed to know when its save to respond. Whenever I text someone I see it like sending a private message, sorta like leaving a voicemail message. I assume you will respond whenever you get the message which can be who knows how long. If I needed a response within a certain time frame, I would make it clear in my message.

As far as I am concerned these ladies didn't just message you out of the blue, they were responding to your message. Just because you weren't prepared for it shouldnt be their fault. Next time phone them direct and not leave a message or just send them another message if they take to long letting them its been too long and ask them not to respond.

If your playing with fire then you need to protect yourself. You can't expect people to do it for you.



Thanks


Nicole

 

[dirkd101]

As far as I'm concerned anything after 1 hour, don't message me back.

 

[vtech763]

I think your wrong. You started by texting her first, which to me gives permission for her to respond back. If you needed her to respond in a certain amount of time then you should have made that clear in your first message. How is she supposed to know when its save to respond. Whenever I text someone I see it like sending a private message, sorta like leaving a voicemail message. I assume you will respond whenever you get the message which can be who knows how long. If I needed a response within a certain time frame, I would make it clear in my message.

As far as I am concerned these ladies didn't just message you out of the blue, they were responding to your message. Just because you weren't prepared for it shouldnt be their fault. Next time phone them direct and not leave a message or just send them another message if they take to long letting them its been too long and ask them not to respond.

If your playing with fire then you need to protect yourself. You can't expect people to do it for you.



Thanks


Nicole

I appreciate your point of view and understand that to be completely safe from this, it is best to provide details of when a response is appropriate. But, let's be realistic....a large number of those who hobby have SO's and are most likely around their SO's at night (especially on the weekend). The same day text, I could almost understand and should be clearer of when to and not to respond. But a text two weeks later?!? Come on...and that text was not a response...it was to let me know her availability for this week. Not cool...I nearly shit my pants when I saw that message as I was at a family function.

Yes, there are many more steps I can take to be more safe, but I would assume that the ladies would have a little more sense than that. And if that's not the case, then I will stay away from the indy ladies as I have NEVER had an issue with unsolicited messages and calls from the agencies (TGF, Mirage, Dream Maker, yes...even GOE! Thanks for that Nicole).

 

[Imperius]

As far as I'm concerned anything after 1 hour, don't message me back.

+1

If I contact an SP/agency, she/they can assume that right now is a good time to have a discreet conversation. I don't think it's reasonable for them to assume that I should be prepared (or inclined) to continue the conversation 24/7/365, at any time in the future, just because I started communicating first.

Also, a text message is not nearly as discreet as a PM, email, or even a voicemail message due to the (often loud) audible alert.

 

[Ms.FemmeFatale]

I would assume that the ladies would have a little more sense than that......

There is your mistake. You are assuming to many things.

You assume that the ladies would know better
You assume they would even care
You assume that they should know you are with family
You assume they should know that you are even married
You assume they got your reply right away
You assume they didn't reply back right away



You can get mad all you want but to be honest, I would not let some assumptions be in control of whether I get busted for cheating. Meaning, get a damn hobby phone and stop assuming everyone else is going to keep your ass covered from your wife finding out what you don't want her to know.

Don't get me wrong, I get what you are saying, but when it is your ass on the line - don't assume and protect yourself.

We get SPAMed everyday by businesses in email, regular mail, phone. Why would you not accept that some in this business are going to do the same?

 

[explorerzip]

If you're concerned about getting a message at the wrong time or having your SO 'accidentally' look at it, get a hobby phone and e-mail address. If you're really paranoid, then don't text an SP because it leaves a trail. If you must text an SP, never discuss details.

 

[pavements]

I agree...hobby phone.

 

[The Mechanic]

Just another way to drum up work when time is slow,I give a 3 hour window to reply after that it's old news time to move on

 

[kerrixoxo]

This is exactly why I prefer emails and rarely do same day appointments (except when I am touring). Text messages are so unreliable.

I love it when potential clients and clients let me know when a good time is to see them as well instead of just a text message with "Are you available?" it's just courtesy thing to include a specific time/time frame

 

[worthit66]

seconding the hobby phone option. just turn it off while you're out with family.

 

[GPIDEAL]

I think your wrong. You started by texting her first, which to me gives permission for her to respond back. If you needed her to respond in a certain amount of time then you should have made that clear in your first message. How is she supposed to know when its save to respond. Whenever I text someone I see it like sending a private message, sorta like leaving a voicemail message. I assume you will respond whenever you get the message which can be who knows how long. If I needed a response within a certain time frame, I would make it clear in my message.

As far as I am concerned these ladies didn't just message you out of the blue, they were responding to your message. Just because you weren't prepared for it shouldnt be their fault. Next time phone them direct and not leave a message or just send them another message if they take to long letting them its been too long and ask them not to respond.

If your playing with fire then you need to protect yourself. You can't expect people to do it for you.



Thanks


Nicole

I don't think he's wrong but there may be two schools of thought here Nicole.

Some Indies actually state on their websites (I've seen this b4) that they won't reply back if there's been a time lag, so best to re-send the message.

For those ladies who know their clients as single, they may text back after the fact without a problem, but one could leave their phone unattended or could be with friends/family, so generally, it's wise not to text back after some time.

 

[GPIDEAL]

It would be helpful if a window of safe response time was provided. I get messages regularly that say ..".... text back before 4pm only" or something like that. Be clear with your expectations and we will gladly oblige.

When I turn off my phone, all the text messages pour in with the same timestamp saying that I JUST got them. I take precautions to keep my secret job private from my family and it isn't that hard or expensive. Prepaid plans can be purchased on a separate sim card, which usually can be hidden in the battery storage of your current phone. I would rather text people back versus have people pissed off at me for not responding. Some of the very cautious guys have txtd me and ended their messages with "you have until 9pm to respond" so that I don't message them while they are unavailable for whatever reason they may have.

Yes, phones that are off don't show time stamp for texts or instant messages. Emails may retain their original sent time stamps though. Good suggestion to indicate last time to reply.

 

[Ember.GFE]

If your playing with fire then you need to protect yourself. You can't expect people to do it for you.

Agreed, not everyone is psychic.


I got a text message from a client, who's been texting me often. The last time he texted me, I replied 2 hours later, because I was in an extended booking. He texted, "I think you got the wrong number." I assumed he was with family, so I didn't reply to that. But the next day, he text me again, and said, "You shouldn't text me when I'm busy."

Um... sorry, how am I supposed to know when you are busy? Especially, when we've been texting back and forth for awhile.


I don't mean to sound rude, but I'm not a psychic, sorry... :faint:

 

[paleofreak187]

Story sounds like bullshit. Sounds like you are being a drama bitch