By whatever metric you want to improve your life by. For the guys posting here, I'd say success with women and getting laid without paying for it.
How many of you GAVE UP on dating figuring your just too undesirable to women?
- Thread starter Partyman1970
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Fair enough.
I talked to buddie the other day who was on a roll dating 3 great women and having an amazing time for last few months, after a dry patch, and then got his Visa bill, realized he had to do some overtime at the mill to pay for the good times and decided to cut back some. He did get some good culture and networking done along the way as well as some tail, so it wasn't all wasted. I kind of reminded him of his first term away at university, good times followed the reality check one week before Xmas exams. he laughed big time.
But some of these guys don't get that far (no offense)...the "best looking" guy at least gets a date.After reading this entire thread everything is instantly solved with one word... Confidence. If you don't feel good about yourself then no one else will either. All that stuff too fat, too shy, too short all goes away with confidence. Ask any girl they will tell you the best looking guy is no catch unless he has a nice personality to go along with it for any type of long term relationship to work.
So whether that confidence comes in the form of formalized cognitive therapy or a prescription bottle of anti depressants seriously consider it, life is too short to wait around self loathing and being bitter and sarcastic.
To the one poster that said his ex wanted you to make 100k unless there was no long term future, you were best to leave as that clearly was not the right girl for you. Don't get me wrong a lot of girls out there are holding out for what they perceive as mr right and will over look you but they will soon come crashing back to reality as their biological locks start ticking. By then they'll realize they made a mistake by passing you up years before. Why do you think there is such a huge increase in a new Marie segment of single older women out there....
And if all else fails remember that as a guy you are still not at the bottoms of the societal structure of cute girl then cute guy followed by ugly guy and eventually ugly girl. So you do have options !
That's the rub. I can't count the times I've heard comments from women like 'he thinks because he 's good looking that he'll get my attention' or some such things and had a few fashion model friends who say they hate dating other models as they think their gods. They want regular guys that can carry on a conversation about things other than themselves, but most don't ask because they think they're not the right type.
There's also attraction to the bad boy and the artist and a twisted one is the wounded bird that they think they can fix or daddy issues or someone who addresses their insecurities or just someone with similar goals and interests/
But the woman you just mentioned right now just got her attention from that good looking guy....she noticed him in the room and is already thinking about him. At that point it's up to him to carry on an intelligent conversation, with manners and not be cocky.
Just like an attractive woman walks into a room and all the guys notice her and try to get her attention. A fugly woman most guys will glance and continue doing what they were doing.
It's like those losers at clubs who try to "surround" that attractive woman while they ignore her friend...
you and fatone are defeating yourselves. Instead of listening to advice you are shooting it down.
I suggested many things that are free or cheap..... like eating better (at the verl least you are improving your longevity and health), dressing better (a dress shirt can cost $15 or $1000 but the $15 is probably infinitely better than a rock t shirt or sweat shirt), and working out (doesn't have to be intense and again at the very least you will be healthier).
So look at it this way those care cheap ways to look better and feel better about yourself..... and if you don't get dates at least you are healthier (which is important if you are alone and there is no one to help take care of you.
jokes)Cheap ways to hedge your bets and at the very least you are healthier or keep doing what you are doing feel miserable about yourself and spend 10 fold later on health care. Once of prevention is worth a pound of cure as they say.
Seelf improvement is really for you. The secondary effect is hopefully making you more attractive.
Also, there's a big difference between setting the goal of the NHL or other examples. They are binary.... either yes or no.
Dating is more attainable because we are talking about dating women in general..... not say dating super models with phds.
We could safely say that if you wantedd to with time you could play in a mens rec league hockey much like you could date GNDs.
From a woman's perspective we have to play hard to get. If you're not willing to give it your all then by all means stick to meaningless sex. There's nothing wrong with that! However, if you really love a woman you pursue her at all costs. Treat it just like venturing to get ahead in your career. You give it your all despite knowing full well that you may not succeed. In other words, don't give up on true love if it burns deeply!
Never said I was fat , didn't dress well or carry on convo with women. The thread was just a survey of what traits make you so universally unattractive to women you give up on dating. I know mine. It is unchangeable & I am a guy that care not to go around trying to beat the odds with massive rejection from 99% of women who will find me not the slightest bit sexually appealing. Thus the hobby.
Try speed dating and practice your conversation skills...even better is something like meetup.com where you share a common interest. Having a common interest is a great ice breaker.
I know 3 guys who have approached thousands of women (literally, after they exhausted their social circle, they did cold approaches etc). They changed their hairstyle/clothes/location/etc but all of them got no where at all.
Granted, its quite possible for some like me who have got interest from women and is yet short that confidence and social skills is all thats theoretically needed.
But a good percentage of the population of males is well and truly f**ked, and not in a good way. I figure its about 20-30%.
Men display and women choose. If a woman doesn't choose you, its game over. If you do everything to improve yourself and you are yet unchosen - well, no amount of pop positivity will change that.
Granted, its quite possible for some like me who have got interest from women and is yet short that confidence and social skills is all thats theoretically needed.
But a good percentage of the population of males is well and truly f**ked, and not in a good way. I figure its about 20-30%.
Men display and women choose. If a woman doesn't choose you, its game over. If you do everything to improve yourself and you are yet unchosen - well, no amount of pop positivity will change that.
Well, I haven't given up on dating... I am physically attractive, still young, etc. but I come to realized it is not that easy. Looks, good job, nice personality, etc. is not necessarily enough for a lot of women. Women have to pick you, I've come to realize. It's the way gender roles have reversed. I'm also at an age where many women are dying to have kids and get married right away... I'm not. I'd like a serious relationship, but it is like winning the lottery to find a woman who is attractive, intelligent, has strong morals and values, isn't obsessed with becoming a baby-factory, AND is into me for me. I'm also not a drinker anymore, so the bar scene is out, not that it ever yielded much success. If you make enough $ to see SP's regularly, no question it's easier if you just want sex with an attractive woman... no contest. So I don't blame anyone who'd rather focus on their career etc. than putting up with the BS of dating and trying to find a woman, if you have made it to this point and are unmarried I don't think it will magically get easier.
If you are not fat, dress well and can carry a convo you are much further ahead in the game than you think. If you are short and ethnic trust me there are openminded women.
There are a fair number of working ladies who come here and add their two cents on topics.
My guess is that since confidence and self improvement have been mentioned there's not much more to say.
Evilbaga: please clarify the " ...and is yet short that confidence ...." My point exactly. If you are socially aware , & I am, you can notice the subtle idicators of interest from women. I am part of that 20-30 % that does not meet the minimum standard of attractiveness. I see more men like me around than women. Women are by far more selective/picky. Fat ugly women even manage to get half decent looking mates if they live life a little & don't hide in the house. Sure, they got it hard. YUP there is 20-30% of us guys who are totally out of the pickings.
