That which can’t be discussed

[wildestdream]

Yeah, I’m going there. No biggie if I get ejected from this forum…

Why can’t we have a proper, civilized discussion about BBFS on TERB?

What differentiates BBFS from any other sex act - I’m looking at you, PSE lovers, BDSM aficionados, etc. As long as it’s between two consenting adults… why be so hush hush about it?

Especially now that there are agencies/SPs that explicitly offer the service as an extra on this very forum (IYKYK, or just simply punch in the acronym in the search tool).

The reason I’m bringing this up is simple. I believe keeping BBFS off the table for discussion actually hurts the community more than it helps. It also puts more SPs at greater risk of having their boundaries pushed against their will.

Just yesterday, a fellow member insinuated that SPs who were fully booked were more likely than not offering BBFS. I know that there are SPs who do provide BBFS and likely have more traffic. But I also know that providing BBFS is not a prerequisite to being fully booked and that many, if not most, popular SPs categorically do not provide the service.

If we could speak openly about BBFS in the same way that we do BBBJs, Greek, FFs and throatpies, slapping and choking, and domination, I believe it would prevent some SP gems who are just good at what they do without having to resort to BBFS from being unnecessarily targeted from mileage hunters (i.e., the “does she do a PS?” crowd, f&#k those guys).

Anyhow, I’ve spoken my bit.

 

[shack]

As much as BBFS is a huge turn on for me, I can appreciate how no discussion of that with IG girls is appropriate. The volume that they deal with, significantly increases their risk if they have to succumb to pressure.

Keep discussion of BBFS off the board..

 

[GeeBee]

Yeah, I’m going there. No biggie if I get ejected from this forum…

Why can’t we have a proper, civilized discussion about BBFS on TERB?

What differentiates BBFS from any other sex act - I’m looking at you, PSE lovers, BDSM aficionados, etc. As long as it’s between two consenting adults… why be so hush hush about it?

Especially now that there are agencies/SPs that explicitly offer the service as an extra on this very forum (IYKYK, or just simply punch in the acronym in the search tool).

The reason I’m bringing this up is simple. I believe keeping BBFS off the table for discussion actually hurts the community more than it helps. It also puts more SPs at greater risk of having their boundaries pushed against their will.

Just yesterday, a fellow member insinuated that SPs who were fully booked were more likely than not offering BBFS. I know that there are SPs who do provide BBFS and likely have more traffic. But I also know that providing BBFS is not a prerequisite to being fully booked and that many, if not most, popular SPs categorically do not provide the service.

If we could speak openly about BBFS in the same way that we do BBBJs, Greek, FFs and throatpies, slapping and choking, and domination, I believe it would prevent some SP gems who are just good at what they do without having to resort to BBFS from being unnecessarily targeted from service hunters (i.e., the “does she do a PS?” crowd, f&#k those guys).

I knew a popular SP who was “outed” on that degenerate other board for providing BBFS even though she didn’t. She admitted that she was petrified to work in the subsequent weeks, not knowing what any non-regular client would be asking for.

Anyhow, I’ve spoken my bit. If I pull an involuntary Keyzer Soze and disappear from this forum, that’s ok, as I said up top… no biggie.

Thats the reason it isn’t discussed here. It puts the girls in danger of what you’ve just described above. Any mention gets shut down so no outing, or false accusations get through.

I agree, keep it off the board.

 

[Patron]

Because of math.

I have no idea what BDSM has to do with any of this?

The most statistically significant risk of STD transmission, and also of course pregnancy, is the deposit of sperm into a vagina or anus. It can seep into the bloodstream, and there are minor vaginal and anal tears during sex.

The most significant risk of an STD for a straight man is the long-term thrusting of an uncondomed penis into the vagina. Not at all like a little bit of vaginal fluid that you might get on the penis after fingering a girl then touching your penis, because quantity matters. In fairness, the risk to the man is always less than to the woman. But keep in mind that for sex workers, they might do 100 acts for every act performed by the John.

Now society did fuck up by acting like certain sex acts such as unprotected oral is dangerous. So someone can somehow mention them in the same sentence. A million to one risk shouldn’t be mentioned in conjunction with a 100 - 1,000 to one risk.

It is not surprising that the group most commonly offering BBFS are Asian immigrants working in spas. The group valued the least by western society and the people with the least control over their lives. The other groups of women do not want this “normalized”.

At the end of the day, if a guy can‘t cum in the condom, it feels just as good to cum in her mouth or in her hand. We owe something to others, since they are at a greater risk than we are.

 

[jimidean2011]

Sigh, I thought this was a thread about fight club....

 

[wildestdream]

Thanks for the thoughtful reply, @Patron.

The reason I mentioned BDSM is that to me, this still comes down to consent (which is actually very different from the nebulous and frankly problematic concept of YMMV).

There have been, are, and will be SPs who, whether through lack of judgment or via a conscious decision (or both), offer BBFS for an extra fee (or even for “free”). They are of clear mind and consent to the act. For some SPs, it’s an open secret, but for others it’s wrapped in layers of innuendo and obfuscation.

Does it not make sense for a) the SPs to have more agency over what they choose to offer (instead of the forum arbitrarily regulating rules of conduct such as no BBFS, “in the name of the SPs’ safety”, when the reality is that the rules are being regularly broken)? and b) hobbyists to have as much transparency as possible in terms of the risks they are taking with any particular SP?

Take for example the agencies that are explicitly listing BBFS as an extra. If you believe that should be straight up banned given it’s an unsafe practice, well, I believe that’s just sticking your head in the sand and such heavy-handed regulation is bound to be ineffective. BBFS will occur no matter what. I think it’s better for everyone, both SPs and hobbyists, when all the cards are clearly laid out on the table.

As another example, I believe Allegra’s approach, whereby their SPs often have a clear menu of services listed on their individual profiles, is forward thinking. If I see an SP does not have CIM listed, then I’d not bother expecting that service.

Imagine for a moment if that extended to BBFS… right now, no one lists BBFS as a service at any reputable non-Asian agencies. The sad irony is that this absence actually makes every SP susceptible to being targeted as potentially offering BBFS.

I’m a proponent for clearly listed menus of all services an SP could provide - with an emphasis on “could”. At the end of the day, it still has to be fully at the SP’s discretion. Such a menu would act as a negative filter - in other words, any items that are not listed would be strictly off limits (even to YMMV).

Such a transparent menu approach would also detract sabotageurs from spreading false rumours, to address the point brought forth by @GeeBee.

As for the potential “normalization” of BBFS if it were made more transparent, I’ll acknowledge that could be a valid point. I’m not a sociologist by training so won’t rebut you there.

I can imagine for some/many on TERB, BBFS is an open-shut issue. But I’m putting my thoughts out here because I don’t believe the current approach of treating the topic like some worst kept secret is actually optimal.

 

[shack]

The most statistically significant risk of STD transmission, and also of course pregnancy, is the deposit of sperm into a vagina or anus. It can seep into the bloodstream, and there are minor vaginal and anal tears during sex.

What if the cum is promptly sucked out of the orifice? It can be shared but not discussed.

 

[onomatopoeia]

What if the cum is promptly sucked out of the orifice? It can be shared but not discussed.

That's a good way to catch monkeypox. IMHO, it's a stomach-turning fetish. Most people would decline if you offered to share.

 

[kherg007]

I understand the topic is: "should we be allowed to discuss? It is not "should it be allowed in the industry?"
However, I believe any discussion must come to terms with:
You will accelerate the development of antibiotic resistant sti's.
You will accelerate marriage failures as more married blokes bring back sti's to their partners.
You will then cause the feds to intervene. And then this gets shut down and/or driven underground where organized crime or other nefarious actors take over.

Yair, realize I drifted over to the latter.

 

[snakebrisket]

Honestly, why would you want to have bbfs with a provider who has fucked a lot of dudes ?

 

[Jenesis]

So you created this account strictly to discuss something you know is not allowed on this forum……..

What’s the motive? It is not just “open discussion”. Because if it was that innocent, you wouldn’t need a new handle.

Edited: for the new people reading. He did explain further in the thread why he has a new handle and it was my bad for insinuating an ulterior motive

 

[thumper18474]

A healthy..poignant discussion about this topic should always be welcomed..some posts already have yielded informative information to the less learned on this board..
Burying your head in the sand won't eliminate it..
If that's where we are at..then to be prudent we should also eliminate
BBBJCIM(SW)
DATY
DATO
PS
all have potential risks when transferring fluids or Skin on Skin contact

 

[onomatopoeia]

To the best of my knowledge, no TERB advertiser lists BBFS as an option in their menu.

TERB is a business, funded almost exclusively through advertising. It is detrimental to that business model to allow the promotion of any sex worker who is not also a paid advertiser, nor any sexual act(s) not provided by TERB advertisers. For this reason, there is a separate area for discussion of providers who only advertise on sites of dubious reputation. Street action also cannot be discussed for this same reason: those sex workers don't pay their site taxes.

As far as I know, discussion of BBFS between a TERB member and a civilian partner is acceptable, and nostalgic discussion of the subject is fair dinkum. Members who choose to engage in such behavior do so at their own risk, and TERB will offer them no assistance in finding, promoting or endorsing such services.

 

[RZG]

Honestly, why would you want to have bbfs with a provider who has fucked a lot of dudes ?

If you play hopscotch(look it up kids), in a minefield, sooner or later...Kaboom!

 

[Mod99]

To the best of my knowledge, no TERB advertiser lists BBFS as an option in their menu.

TERB is a business, funded almost exclusively through advertising. It is detrimental to that business model to allow the promotion of any sex worker who is not also a paid advertiser, nor any sexual act(s) not provided by TERB advertisers. For this reason, there is a separate area for discussion of providers who only advertise on sites of dubious reputation. Street action also cannot be discussed for this same reason: those sex workers don't pay their site taxes.

This is incorrect.

 

[shack]

View attachment 353379

That's a good way to catch monkeypox. IMHO, it's a stomach-turning fetish. Most people would decline if you offered to share.

The butt was not a consideration for me. Patron mentioned pregnancy. I should have been more specific.

 

[Patron]

The butt was not a consideration for me. Patron mentioned pregnancy. I should have been more specific.

There is so much propaganda about immigration in the U.S. that you never know what to believe, but some people argue that some Asian ladies on visas, and even visa overstayers, who work at massage parlors try to get pregnant to get the baby U.S. anchor status if she can manage to stay in the U.S. long enough to give birth. In theory, it doesn‘t help her get citizenship, but who knows. If she can argue that she would be discriminated against as a single mom in her native country, it might sway someone. And the baby can return to the U.S. as a citizen someday, and in theory even sponsor his/her mom for her to return once the baby is twenty-one, and realistically she wouldn’t really be that old by then.

Which obviously brings up a troubling issue. It is one thing if you are rich and you get a barebacking sugar baby pregnant. But what if you get the random Asian massage girl pregnant who comes from a country where everyone in her neighborhood lives on $10 a day and she thinks it is great that your unknown baby will someday return to the U.S. and live on $80 a day. That is still your kid who will live in poverty. You don’t know it, unless you find out someday through an ancestry dot com match. Not how most of us want to live our lives.

 

[Knuckle Ball]

There is so much propaganda about immigration in the U.S. that you never know what to believe, but some people argue that some Asian ladies on visas, and even visa overstayers, who work at massage parlors try to get pregnant to get the baby U.S. anchor status if she can manage to stay in the U.S. long enough to give birth. In theory, it doesn‘t help her get citizenship, but who knows. If she can argue that she would be discriminated against as a single mom in her native country, it might sway someone. And the baby can return to the U.S. as a citizen someday, and in theory even sponsor his/her mom for her to return once the baby is twenty-one, and realistically she wouldn’t really be that old by then.

Which obviously brings up a troubling issue. It is one thing if you are rich and you get a barebacking sugar baby pregnant. But what if you get the random Asian massage girl pregnant who comes from a country where everyone in her neighborhood lives on $10 a day and she thinks it is great that your unknown baby will someday return to the U.S. and live on $80 a day. That is still your kid who will live in poverty. You don’t know it, unless you find out someday through an ancestry dot com match. Not how most of us want to live our lives.

If an Asian immigrant wants to get pregnant she does not need to be a sex worker to do so. In fact, most women who get pregnant are not sex workers…even Asian immigrants!

 

[Patron]

If an Asian immigrant wants to get pregnant she does not need to be a sex worker to do so. In fact, most women who get pregnant are not sex workers…even Asian immigrants!

I think you are underestimating the percentage of men, particularly in the U.S., that will avoid a woman who clearly wants to get pregnant for reasons other than love.

Child support payments are no joking matter.

On the other hand, if she offers BBFS full service for $200 extra every day to four customers, and two accept, the pregnancy odds are pretty good. And many days those two who accepted the offer would have declined free sex from her in civilian life if she knew his real name and cell phone number.

And the civilian guy might, or might not, marry her. Especially if her English is iffy. If she can imply rape or sexual assault at the massage parlor, that might get more sympathy from Immigration. She won’t happen to mention the $200 extra.

 

[jsanchez]

I think you are underestimating the percentage of men, particularly in the U.S., that will avoid a woman who clearly wants to get pregnant for reasons other than love.

Child support payments are no joking matter.

On the other hand, if she offers BBFS full service for $200 extra every day to four customers, and two accept, the pregnancy odds are pretty good. And many days those two who accepted the offer would have declined free sex from her in civilian life if she knew his real name and cell phone number.

And the civilian guy might, or might not, marry her. Especially if her English is iffy. If she can imply rape or sexual assault at the massage parlor, that might get more sympathy from Immigration. She won’t happen to mention the $200 extra.

If an Asian immigrant wants to get pregnant she does not need to be a sex worker to do so. In fact, most women who get pregnant are not sex workers…even Asian immigrants!

There is a lot of stereotyping of Asian/immigrant ladies and bbfs, let me bust a couple stereotypes.

The idea that some poor sp's want to get pregnant from johns who may never be seen again is just paranoia.

I recall 5 caucasian Canadian girls who offered it in the past and not so distant past
(one was Russian therefore not old-stock Canadian)
the price ranging from zero to prohibitive, pussyslide was available when I started hobbying decades ago
and long before the Asian influx, and don't mention cum or ps to many Latinas and other nationalites
unless you fancy getting insulted, spit on or bitch slapped (our friend rocco_s would pay for that lol)