Random Photo/Video Thread

So, I took an early morning walk in the parking lot and saw this woman in her car.

Me: Ma'am, do you need any help?
She: I'm just looking for my car keys. Could you pull my skirt down so it covers my bum?
Me: No problem. Have a nice day.

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Ok, I'm back from the hospital. Before I left I asked the NP (nurse practitioner) "how was it"? She said you have nice testicles. No sex for 2 weeks. Next appointment we want a sample of your sperms. She then said:

a) We can have a pretty young female nursing student help you produce the sample, or
b) we can stick a long needle into one of your testicles and withdraw a sample.
 
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I did a quick walk around the parking lot earlier this morning.
This woman looks like she spent the night in her car.
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Ma'am, wake up. No sleeping in the parking lot. Plus, your privates are exposed.
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Darn! Just got a text from the mall manager. Wants to see me about some issue.

Me: Did you want to see me?
Manager: Yes, please come in.

Me: But, you're not fully dressed yet.
Manager: Don't be so shy. Come right in.

Manager: You did a great job getting rid of the naked women on the escalators.
Me: Thank you.

Manager: Now I want you to get rid of the people engaging in sex in their car and the naked women hanging around the parking lot.
Me: I'll do my best.
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