You bring up an excellent point, and I totally see where you’re coming from. It really does highlight a double standard. If we’re being honest, there’s not much difference between excluding clients based on race and excluding them for other physical attributes like weight, age, or height. It’s all about making judgments based on superficial characteristics, and yet society seems to treat some of these exclusions as more "acceptable" than others.Wow!
Yes! IMO you put it so perfectly.
Agree, agree, agree.
It's fascinating, and honestly a bit ironic, how even providers of the same race sometimes refuse to see clients who share their background. That makes it clear that it's not necessarily about cultural or safety concerns, as some claim, but more about internalized biases or catering to certain stereotypes they might have come to believe over time. It’s almost like a form of self-directed prejudice, and it can be quite disheartening to see.
Preferences are, of course, everyone's right. But when they’re applied selectively, it starts to look less like a preference and more like discrimination. We often see these kinds of exclusions rationalized with reasons like "comfort" or "compatibility," but if the same criteria aren’t being applied consistently, it does beg the question of what’s truly driving these decisions.
At the end of the day, whether someone screens clients based on race, body type, or age, it all comes down to personal biases. But the cost of these biases is that providers might be missing out on genuine connections with clients who could be respectful, kind, and enjoyable to be around, regardless of their physical characteristics. It’s unfortunate that these kinds of preferences can prevent meaningful interactions and connections that could go far beyond the surface level.
Thanks for bringing this up—it’s an uncomfortable but necessary conversation to have. There’s a lot to unpack about how we think about preferences versus prejudice, and it’s refreshing to see someone willing to call it out.