I disagree. The bulk of the Terb members have $$$ to burn. So in that way we have much in common. Nobody wants to be "robbed."
The word con as in con man comes from the word confidence. A con man/woman will get you to trust him/her. Remember the movie The Sting?
Love is love, and business is business.
Separately, The Sting was modelled on a con man. I cannot remember his name right now. However, after a lifetime of scamming people, he was tired of the lies, and he wanted to make an honest living. But his reputation preceded him, and nobody would do business with him. I believe he eked out a living at the end of his life.
The argument that being alone is sad if flawed. There are many marriages where people are alone. Read many posts on this forum and you will read that men see SP's because of sexless and empty marriages. But there are with someone. This is sad, living a lie. Do you have human connections? A community? If you answer yes, then you are not alone.
Yes we all want what we do not have. As a fellow who has seen street walker, escorts, providers or any other name you want to us. I have not had a real relationship in 40+ years. So i am not one to talk. I have had a number of ladies who I paid to be with me. I had a sugar baby before sugar babies were a thing. It cost me endless number of dollars. I am not tied to anyone and no one is tied to me. Do I wish I had a relationship with someone? I would be lying if I said I did not want it. But when I feel I need it I hire a ladies to play the role I need.
The point is you need to decide what you want and know there are good and bad with any decision. You can find a way to make things work when it is you. Adding another person is not easy but it works for others. Learn to be happy with what you have and not what you do not have. Either way it is costly. As you get older the sex is less important but the interaction is a blast.
oddly enough when not with a women/partner I have furthered my life, goals and successes then with one in my life. while they offer distraction and a flood of emotions I find that I cannot focus my drive to improve my life in the direction I wish.
oddly enough when not with a women/partner I have furthered my life, goals and successes then with one in my life. while they offer distraction and a flood of emotions I find that I cannot focus my drive to improve my life in the direction I wish.
That's an interesting observation - my ex-wife was an total anchor on my happiness and career - my income and health increased dramatically on my own.
Had two serious GF relationships since then in opposite camps. First "rebound" relationship was okay sex but she was material. The second GF motivated me to want to be better in all aspects of my life and she was absolutely off the charts incredible sexually. Obviously she was a much better GF.
For now I am choosing not to have a relationship which is why I am here having great fun with some much younger ladies.
Poorboy...before you advance any more with her, Google Michael Latner. See how bad things can get. You mentioned you have a lot to lose and it appears you`re going to do just that.
I thought the Third World existed for people in your situation. Go to Colombia, hitch up with a sweet 25 year old who will call you papi and treat you like a man. She won't love you, but she'll pretend to more than your typical North American woman. Every day will be an Oscar award winning performance on her part that you'll begin to believe it. Enjoy her company... she will also keep you young at heart. Die happy in a warm climate with her by your side.
Look up oneitice on the internet. Y anyone who's been around a few years would marrie is beyond me. Having a girlfriend is one thing. Could be quite nice. And you can always broom her if she gets out of hand. But to give up your financial independence is absolutely ludicrous. Don't be a needy little girl.
"Better Bachelor" on Youtube has a lot to say about this sort of thing in terms of societal trends. It does not look that promising.
Problem is, finding a unicorn to marry is not so easy, which is why many of us are part of the TERB community.
Ask yourself, could you really give up the hobby for her? Give it a year or two, don't hobby, be exlcusive with her, keep your separate residence, and see how it goes.
Some anecdotes and insights...the most obvious one being "things change after 50".
I have women friends who worry about the dichotomy of wanting companionship as they age, while worrying about becoming a "nurse with a purse" (that's what they call it). In other words there are a lot of baby boomer men who are heading into their declining years with poor physical and financial health, and they're looking for someone to help take care of them in the broadest sense of the words.
From a men's side, my buddies warn me to be able to distinguish sex from love (boy this is tough) and not fall in love with someone who is not at an equivalent financial level of security as you are....because love means you will always end up paying their bills.
So once you're past 50 and you're into the "financial protection" years rather than high growth or long earning potential, the money consideration becomes a top criteria for a potential long term relationship...and I truly believe this applies to both sexes.
There was a NY Times story in the paper on the weekend about the role of matchmakers and why they still exist in today's on-line society. Money considerations, not surprisingly, was one of the reasons.
Some anecdotes and insights...the most obvious one being "things change after 50".
I have women friends who worry about the dichotomy of wanting companionship as they age, while worrying about becoming a "nurse with a purse" (that's what they call it). In other words there are a lot of baby boomer men who are heading into their declining years with poor physical and financial health, and they're looking for someone to help take care of them in the broadest sense of the words.
From a men's side, my buddies warn me to be able to distinguish sex from love (boy this is tough) and not fall in love with someone who is not at an equivalent financial level of security as you are....because love means you will always end up paying their bills.
So once you're past 50 and you're into the "financial protection" years rather than high growth or long earning potential, the money consideration becomes a top criteria for a potential long term relationship...and I truly believe this applies to both sexes.
There was a NY Times story in the paper on the weekend about the role of matchmakers and why they still exist in today's on-line society. Money considerations, not surprisingly, was one of the reasons.
I thought the Third World existed for people in your situation. Go to Colombia, hitch up with a sweet 25 year old who will call you papi and treat you like a man. She won't love you, but she'll pretend to more than your typical North American woman. Every day will be an Oscar award winning performance on her part that you'll begin to believe it. Enjoy her company... she will also keep you young at heart. Die happy in a warm climate with her by your side.
I'll take a Latina hottie who pretends to care about me and love me and stays with me through thick and thin over a typical North American woman who acts that way for 14 years and then turns on me unexpectedly almost overnight and bends me over a table. Dying happy in a warm climate with her by my side sounds better than dying angry in a cold climate with no one by my side, which I seem destined for, unless I book a trip to Colombia or Costa Rica or Cuba or wherever.
Before I do, I'll transfer a large chunk of my money to my children, kind of an advanced inheritance, in case my marriage to this Colombian hottie goes the way of my first marriage to the typical North American.
...There was a NY Times story in the paper on the weekend about the role of matchmakers and why they still exist in today's on-line society. Money considerations, not surprisingly, was one of the reasons.
The only modern matchmakers I am aware of are fairly obvious scammers.
“we are very special and we charge a lot but we have a database of special women but it’s secret and we will produce a woman from time to time that we feel is a good match for you”
“Well so I have to pay thousands of dollars for this, fine...but how do I know that you have more than like three women in your database?”
- No answer
+1. What's wrong with being a 50-year old bachelor, ESPECIALLY earning 100k+, mortgage free, and RRSP's maxed out?
Sounds to me that you're on the right track.
I personally think that there's nothing wrong with being a bachelor.
Being a bachelor is partly by choice, partly by circumstance. You may be in a minority, but lots of married guys will probably say that you're doing great.
This reminds me of the adage that nobody looks back on their life on their death bed and wishes they worked more or had more money.
Legacy will bring you true happiness. And legacy means different things to different people. Spend your money on making memories, because at the end of the day, its a short trip. Humans are meant to experience everything they can while they are here. If your thing is carnal, go sleep with as many people as you can. If its charitable work, give your money away. What ever makes you happy go do it- GUILT free.
One series of books that helped me rationalize my existence was Conversations With God by Neal David Walsh. I am not religious by any stretch, but from a philosophical point of view this helped me see the big picture of life and relationships.
We have all struggled, rich or poor at some point in our lives. Having relationships and like minded people to talk to is the key to a happy existence. Even despots have friends!
It's so strange to read such a message. There is nothing about feelings here. You only talk about money money money ... it's awful. Let her be an immigrant or whatever. It doesn't make her worse or better than you. It does not matter at all who her parents are and how her children live, the main thing is only your feelings. It may sound very naive, but I really believe in it. I also wanted to say that if you are in doubt, tell it honestly to this woman and try to find the one you love here https://bride-forever.com/senior-dating
feelings are the worse way to pick a woman since they are your feelings and not how she feels about you. one problem with people is that they assume the other person is feeling the way they are which is far from the truth. feelings flutter and change quickly. this is typically the honeymoon period.
money equals security and opportunity. its a resource that should be guarded at all cost considering the legal issues that arise in relationship that is splitting.
This reminds me of the adage that nobody looks back on their life on their death bed and wishes they worked more or had more money.
Legacy will bring you true happiness. And legacy means different things to different people. Spend your money on making memories, because at the end of the day, its a short trip. Humans are meant to experience everything they can while they are here. If your thing is carnal, go sleep with as many people as you can. If its charitable work, give your money away. What ever makes you happy go do it- GUILT free.
One series of books that helped me rationalize my existence was Conversations With God by Neal David Walsh. I am not religious by any stretch, but from a philosophical point of view this helped me see the big picture of life and relationships.
We have all struggled, rich or poor at some point in our lives. Having relationships and like minded people to talk to is the key to a happy existence. Even despots have friends!
