She posted the quote 2 years ago.
She posted this the other day. Peeps don't read. She doesn't hold grudges, just tired of dealing with a fresh batch of lazy peeps.
Accept & Respect
- Thread starter Sophia Sinclair
- Start date
With all due respect to the OP, this is what being in business as a professional means. You have to deal with bullshit. Strange hours? Demanding clients? Haggling? - it's all part of life as a professional. The OP stated that she used to work at Shoppers Drug Mart. Retail is a lot more rigid in terms of hours, closing times, prices, etc. etc. Retail pays minimum wage, maybe minimum plus a couple of bucks an hour at best.
Here is my world as a so called professional.
1. Low price gets the job. Every time. The client puts out a scope of work, they solicit bids from qualified similar companies and he who bids the lowest gets the job. Now imagine if sex workers worked like this. Clients put out a shopping list, (BBBJ, DFK, COF, etc. etc. )and the only way you picked up work was by being the lowest price on the block. Second prize? Well unlike Glengary Glenross, there is no set of steak knives as second prize in my world. There's fucking nothing. It's winner take all. We can spend months preparing a bid for work. It can cost tens of thousands of dollars. And at the end of the day - second lowest price = zilch.
2. Even when you're low, the client will try to chisel you down before awarding a contract. How come your item for this is so much more than your competition? Your price for that seems high. What about if we pay you in 10 days instead of 30 (which really means 90), can you cut 2 points off your price?
3. Work hours? It's 24-7. Cell phone is always on and you have to be prepared to get on a plane at a moments' notice.
4. You planned a vacation? Too bad, this came up. Cancel your vacation. No, we won't reimburse you for your tickets. Talk to your boss about that.
5. Risk - huge
6. Liability - more huge.
7. And speaking of getting paid, it's supposed to be 30 days. Some clients, it's more like 6 months. Imagine providing your service and not getting paid for 6 months my dear. In the mean time, you've got payroll and overhead to cover. Does my client give a fuck? Nope. You should consider yourself lucky, there were 4 other companies vying for this contract and you got it. Consider yourself fortunate you're working for the likes of us.
8. Subcontractors. They make a mistake and it's my problem. Imagine getting a quote for a certain scope of work and then when it comes time to do the work, they charge you more because they fucked up. Too bad for me. Sure, I could go to the next guy, but his price is even higher. Problem is, I've carried the lower price in my estimate. Then the fuckers start demanding extra money for one thing or another from me. The client won't pay. So what do you do?
9. Vacation. If I get half of my allotted vacation per year, I'm fortunate.
10. Overtime pay? Does not exist in my world. You need to work to get the job done on time and on budget. (Preferably on budget.) If you need to work 12 hours a day 6 days a week, so be it. But you'll get the same pay every 2 weeks.
11. Ball buster clients? Yes sir. Lots of them.
So, to the original poster, I don't feel too sorry for you.
The only thing (as far as I'm concerned) crosses the line is abuse. No-one should have to put up with abuse. But everything else is par for the course.
Here is my world as a so called professional.
1. Low price gets the job. Every time. The client puts out a scope of work, they solicit bids from qualified similar companies and he who bids the lowest gets the job. Now imagine if sex workers worked like this. Clients put out a shopping list, (BBBJ, DFK, COF, etc. etc. )and the only way you picked up work was by being the lowest price on the block. Second prize? Well unlike Glengary Glenross, there is no set of steak knives as second prize in my world. There's fucking nothing. It's winner take all. We can spend months preparing a bid for work. It can cost tens of thousands of dollars. And at the end of the day - second lowest price = zilch.
2. Even when you're low, the client will try to chisel you down before awarding a contract. How come your item for this is so much more than your competition? Your price for that seems high. What about if we pay you in 10 days instead of 30 (which really means 90), can you cut 2 points off your price?
3. Work hours? It's 24-7. Cell phone is always on and you have to be prepared to get on a plane at a moments' notice.
4. You planned a vacation? Too bad, this came up. Cancel your vacation. No, we won't reimburse you for your tickets. Talk to your boss about that.
5. Risk - huge
6. Liability - more huge.
7. And speaking of getting paid, it's supposed to be 30 days. Some clients, it's more like 6 months. Imagine providing your service and not getting paid for 6 months my dear. In the mean time, you've got payroll and overhead to cover. Does my client give a fuck? Nope. You should consider yourself lucky, there were 4 other companies vying for this contract and you got it. Consider yourself fortunate you're working for the likes of us.
8. Subcontractors. They make a mistake and it's my problem. Imagine getting a quote for a certain scope of work and then when it comes time to do the work, they charge you more because they fucked up. Too bad for me. Sure, I could go to the next guy, but his price is even higher. Problem is, I've carried the lower price in my estimate. Then the fuckers start demanding extra money for one thing or another from me. The client won't pay. So what do you do?
9. Vacation. If I get half of my allotted vacation per year, I'm fortunate.
10. Overtime pay? Does not exist in my world. You need to work to get the job done on time and on budget. (Preferably on budget.) If you need to work 12 hours a day 6 days a week, so be it. But you'll get the same pay every 2 weeks.
11. Ball buster clients? Yes sir. Lots of them.
So, to the original poster, I don't feel too sorry for you.
The only thing (as far as I'm concerned) crosses the line is abuse. No-one should have to put up with abuse. But everything else is par for the course.
JTK,
We all deal with issues in our lives, whether it be our personal rel'ps (e.g. https://terb.cc/vbulletin/showthread.php?476235-All-vanilla-sex-all-the-time-is-boring-me-to-tears) our work, etc. in different ways. I have sympathized with what you were going through in the past with your SO and can sympathize with you in what you go through at your current job, yet you can't sympathize with me trying to educate some of the new members here as to how to better deal with us female providers and the work we do.
I had to go on here to ask for references for window replacement partly because I simply don't want to be taken advantage of and because I was having such a hard time finding a decent contractor to take on a small job like mine. Why waste their time with a little wartime house only needing 5 basement windows upgraded when they could make so much more money doing that huge house out in the country needing all its windows replaced? My guess is that you work for a large company and when dealing in such large amounts of money there is a lot more pressure as well as room for negotiating a price. I don't know what industry you're in or level you're at so can't really say for certain, but am basing it on your tens of thousands of dollars comment. I personally offer hh appointments right up to weekend getaways. You'll have to trust me when I say that overnights and weekend getaways, the truly big bucks for me, are rare and that I try my best to treat all clients, no matter what duration they book me for with the same respect and service level. Admittedly, there's only so much I can shave off my hh price, so to speak, by allowing a session to run into overtime but I certainly can be more generous time wise with a larger booking, so I get it.
Here's the thing. I never bump a hh client for a multiple hour client. I honour my dealings with one and all and try my best to give the same service level no matter what duration they've booked me for. My reputation is all I have really and I'm in this for the long haul. Interestingly in my business dealings it would seem that the majority of negotiating goes on at the lower level and not at the higher level, probably because for them it is a lot of money and sometimes because it is a cultural practice. Rarely does the gent booking a dinner date or overnight start haggling price with me.
Back to contractors. Personally, I'd rather pay slightly more for a quality product and by this I don't just mean the product itself (e.g. window) but the business owner or employee that takes the time, care and attention to explain things to me and treat me with respect. However, I'm not an employee who has to explain to my boss why I went with the more expensive company or answer to the bean counters (no offence to my accountant clients, friends and my actual accountant should he be an unknown to me member on here) whose job revolves around the bottom line and saving the company money. Big companies have more buying power and can force smaller companies into a bidding war (e.g. major car manufacturers). In my little sole proprietorship I'm the hostess, bartendress, chef (who am I kidding, I don't cook), dish washer, etc. and get to make all the executive decisions. I also deal fully with the fallout from any bad decision I make, monetary or otherwise.
I too never really get a lot of time off as I often spend my weekends dealing with my rental properties, my other business. I try to be a good landlady as well and fair as I can be with my tenants in tending to their needs. My dad taught me that you accommodate good tenants as much as possible because you don't want to deal with bad ones. Again, I have all the worry that goes with that and no one to blame but myself if I make a poor decision, which I have in the past. It not only meant lost revenue on my rental property but lost time at this job as well, which can't be recouped.
I haven't taken a vacation period since 2010, to hopefully be rectified this Feb. I was raised by a German father and have his work ethic. By the way, I don't get vacation pay, being self employed I have to work that into the budget. Also, when I first started out I worked Mon. to Sat., from 10 am until 10 pm, charged less and saw more clients in a day than I do now. Like any fledgling business I had to put in my dues to get where I am today and still strive to keep my prices reasonable, especially given my reputation and current business practices (e.g. limiting the number of gents I see in a day) and business improvements (e.g. better incall amenities, etc.).
I remember my saving grace growing up, the one positive adult influence in my life, explaining to me in my teens that not everyone is like me and don't necessarily have my conscientiousness. This is still my biggest problem in life. I keep expecting others to have the same sense of fair play that I do, which unfortunately isn't always the case. I would hazard that it often isn't, as evidenced by what we both go through in our respective jobs. Slow learning curve on that one for me.
I wish you nothing but the best in your chosen field/career and hope that you can find some sympathy for me in mine and for the other providers on here as well as I'm certain they too get frustrated from time to time by the same things I do. If you cannot, that is a reflection on you and not on me. We all have our crosses to bear and sometimes we need a gentle reminder of that.
We all deal with issues in our lives, whether it be our personal rel'ps (e.g. https://terb.cc/vbulletin/showthread.php?476235-All-vanilla-sex-all-the-time-is-boring-me-to-tears) our work, etc. in different ways. I have sympathized with what you were going through in the past with your SO and can sympathize with you in what you go through at your current job, yet you can't sympathize with me trying to educate some of the new members here as to how to better deal with us female providers and the work we do.
I had to go on here to ask for references for window replacement partly because I simply don't want to be taken advantage of and because I was having such a hard time finding a decent contractor to take on a small job like mine. Why waste their time with a little wartime house only needing 5 basement windows upgraded when they could make so much more money doing that huge house out in the country needing all its windows replaced? My guess is that you work for a large company and when dealing in such large amounts of money there is a lot more pressure as well as room for negotiating a price. I don't know what industry you're in or level you're at so can't really say for certain, but am basing it on your tens of thousands of dollars comment. I personally offer hh appointments right up to weekend getaways. You'll have to trust me when I say that overnights and weekend getaways, the truly big bucks for me, are rare and that I try my best to treat all clients, no matter what duration they book me for with the same respect and service level. Admittedly, there's only so much I can shave off my hh price, so to speak, by allowing a session to run into overtime but I certainly can be more generous time wise with a larger booking, so I get it.
Here's the thing. I never bump a hh client for a multiple hour client. I honour my dealings with one and all and try my best to give the same service level no matter what duration they've booked me for. My reputation is all I have really and I'm in this for the long haul. Interestingly in my business dealings it would seem that the majority of negotiating goes on at the lower level and not at the higher level, probably because for them it is a lot of money and sometimes because it is a cultural practice. Rarely does the gent booking a dinner date or overnight start haggling price with me.
Back to contractors. Personally, I'd rather pay slightly more for a quality product and by this I don't just mean the product itself (e.g. window) but the business owner or employee that takes the time, care and attention to explain things to me and treat me with respect. However, I'm not an employee who has to explain to my boss why I went with the more expensive company or answer to the bean counters (no offence to my accountant clients, friends and my actual accountant should he be an unknown to me member on here) whose job revolves around the bottom line and saving the company money. Big companies have more buying power and can force smaller companies into a bidding war (e.g. major car manufacturers). In my little sole proprietorship I'm the hostess, bartendress, chef (who am I kidding, I don't cook), dish washer, etc. and get to make all the executive decisions. I also deal fully with the fallout from any bad decision I make, monetary or otherwise.
I too never really get a lot of time off as I often spend my weekends dealing with my rental properties, my other business. I try to be a good landlady as well and fair as I can be with my tenants in tending to their needs. My dad taught me that you accommodate good tenants as much as possible because you don't want to deal with bad ones. Again, I have all the worry that goes with that and no one to blame but myself if I make a poor decision, which I have in the past. It not only meant lost revenue on my rental property but lost time at this job as well, which can't be recouped.
I haven't taken a vacation period since 2010, to hopefully be rectified this Feb. I was raised by a German father and have his work ethic. By the way, I don't get vacation pay, being self employed I have to work that into the budget. Also, when I first started out I worked Mon. to Sat., from 10 am until 10 pm, charged less and saw more clients in a day than I do now. Like any fledgling business I had to put in my dues to get where I am today and still strive to keep my prices reasonable, especially given my reputation and current business practices (e.g. limiting the number of gents I see in a day) and business improvements (e.g. better incall amenities, etc.).
I remember my saving grace growing up, the one positive adult influence in my life, explaining to me in my teens that not everyone is like me and don't necessarily have my conscientiousness. This is still my biggest problem in life. I keep expecting others to have the same sense of fair play that I do, which unfortunately isn't always the case. I would hazard that it often isn't, as evidenced by what we both go through in our respective jobs. Slow learning curve on that one for me.
I wish you nothing but the best in your chosen field/career and hope that you can find some sympathy for me in mine and for the other providers on here as well as I'm certain they too get frustrated from time to time by the same things I do. If you cannot, that is a reflection on you and not on me. We all have our crosses to bear and sometimes we need a gentle reminder of that.
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I don't feel sorry for you either. Your job sounds like it is your life. That's unfortunate. Life's too short as it is. Actually, I do feel sorry for you.
The thing is JTK, I wasn't looking for sympathy either, just attempting to educate/inform new hobbyists, among others, on how to be courteous of others and their boundaries. A point that seems lost on many in today's society as well as on here.
Peace Out as I have work to do and joy to spread!
Peace Out as I have work to do and joy to spread!
I am overwhelmed at the defensiveness shown by most of the men on this site. Could they be the culprits you talk about Sophia? Your comparisons to other businesses made it easy enough to understand for someone at the age of a kindergardener. So why all of the defensiveness. Why can't a woman make a few VERY SIMPLE requests, without you men shaking her tree. Why do I have to tell a stranger my name or whether i own or rent, how much i pay in rent or mortgage fees. Why is that anyone's business. That isn't small talk. That is plain nosiness and rudeness. Do I ask you whether or not you own or rent? Why is it any different? Do i ask you for your real name? No, I value and respect your privacy. This thread has really shocked me in terms of men nor owning up... or not being able to see the perspective from the other side. It is like a fraternity on here excluding the courteous, open minded "gentlemen."
