Think I'm going to watch that movie. Looking at the trailer looks like that is becoming like me. Fuck I even jog allot!
Hobbying is more efficient than Dating.
- Thread starter waynward
- Start date
I think the discovery of hobbying has made me less "desperate" for sex because I can get it at any time as long as I can pay for it.
I'm more able to be true about myself rather than to sacrifice my own needs and feelings so I can get a girl's pussy.
If one is looking for pure sex, I think hobby is definitely the cheapest way to do it if you are making alright money.
Hobbying actually made me want to find a girl that is more compatible with me overall than just physical attribute. If I want a hot babe for sex, I just need to pick up the phone. On the other hand, finding someone who is a good partner is harder and should be valued more than looks.
I used to be in the PUA movement but now I find the entire concept ridiculous. Some people would recommend getting a job like bartender so they can get more laid. To me, this is a waste of your core purpose in life because you could be doing something great with your life.
If you want to find a life partner, then yes, you should date. However, if you just want to get laid, then dating a girl with the pretence of love just to fuck them is wrong unless both parties understand this is a NOA encounter.
Simple Equations:
Hobby ~= ONS
Hobby != Relationship
I'm more able to be true about myself rather than to sacrifice my own needs and feelings so I can get a girl's pussy.
If one is looking for pure sex, I think hobby is definitely the cheapest way to do it if you are making alright money.
Hobbying actually made me want to find a girl that is more compatible with me overall than just physical attribute. If I want a hot babe for sex, I just need to pick up the phone. On the other hand, finding someone who is a good partner is harder and should be valued more than looks.
I used to be in the PUA movement but now I find the entire concept ridiculous. Some people would recommend getting a job like bartender so they can get more laid. To me, this is a waste of your core purpose in life because you could be doing something great with your life.
If you want to find a life partner, then yes, you should date. However, if you just want to get laid, then dating a girl with the pretence of love just to fuck them is wrong unless both parties understand this is a NOA encounter.
Simple Equations:
Hobby ~= ONS
Hobby != Relationship
This is one of the best threads I've ever read. It actually is curing me over my relationship blues. I dated someone and it was a pretty serious relationship . I had the sex drive of a tiger and my ex was complaining she couldn't keep up with me. In the beginning she was dressing it up and looking so hot for me, and doing all that kinky shit for me. Than as the relationship progressed she started just wearing whatever. The kink started disappearing. Then there were times we went from having sex twice a day, to once a day, to twice a week. What sucks is in order for me to keep her happy, I started buying her gifts, I spent a shit load of money on her and the daily sex would resume again for about a month, than it slowly went back to the same routines. The sex really started getting stale. We used to have sex for a good strong two hours, then it just went to us doing mish, she'd come once, I'd come once, then we went to sleep. The only thing I really enjoyed was the companionship - which was having dinner and watching movies on Netflix and curling up over the couch. But now I can do that with a couple of buddies who come over and we just hang out over a couple of beers , bbq, and play video games. With the guys were all straight shooters. When I was with my girl, there was a lot of mind fucking games. So much so that my eyes started to wander and I was yearning for the next fuck without the baggage on a hot girl I'd see on the street. My ex caught me looking and gave me shit for it. Then I resorted to watching porn secretly, got caught and punished for it. No sex! Finally out of that relationship and have resumed hobbying. But I made the mistake of looking for a relationship, but what this thread helped me realize is all I really want is sex. The pursuit of a relationship comes with too much baggage . I have a thriving career I need to continue growing and it also can help me afford this hobby . I got good friends both male and female. None of them know I do this. So now that I think about it, fuck relationships . All it got me was trouble. I just want to get laid, so what this is enabling me now is for me to concentrate on my career. Yesterday , I had propositioned my ex to have a no relationship but have sex arrangement, and she said she'd think about it. Fuck, after reading this thread , what was I thinking!!! Thank you guys, you just helped me solve a major issue in my life! Fuck, awesome therapy session!!!!
Damn you guys are persuasive!!
Here I am, relatively high income and going up, thinking i have so much to offer in every way and that the right woman could bring the best out in me when the answer is to just to hit up Mirage or an indy!
Sometimes, like my female financial planner said, we men need some perspective!
Here I am, relatively high income and going up, thinking i have so much to offer in every way and that the right woman could bring the best out in me when the answer is to just to hit up Mirage or an indy!
Sometimes, like my female financial planner said, we men need some perspective!
Can relate to your story on many levels friend. Thanks for sharing.
Stale sex has been my number one reason for leaving relationships. Unfortunately most women dangle the power of sex in front of man. Making it a scarce commodity in the real world. So a man gets "lucky" and is uncertain when he will have sex again. Or he has to sleep on the couche for being a bad little boy. And she continues to berate and nag him until he is sexually starved and has no more will as a man. A common dynamic I see which is just wrong. Particularly if you are a nice, caring guy you can get eaten alive in this regard. (Speaking from my own experience) This hobby takes away that power where you can have it on a whim. And it helps even more that the women can be very attractive, down to earth and perform better than non-pros. In my mind if I ever choose to enter a relationship with a woman now, it's more than what she offers than "just sex". Such as her drive and ambition in life, her level of compassion and ability to nurture, her intelligence. So in my mind this hobby actually improves my filtering system and increases my standards.
Stale sex has been my number one reason for leaving relationships. Unfortunately most women dangle the power of sex in front of man. Making it a scarce commodity in the real world. So a man gets "lucky" and is uncertain when he will have sex again. Or he has to sleep on the couche for being a bad little boy. And she continues to berate and nag him until he is sexually starved and has no more will as a man. A common dynamic I see which is just wrong. Particularly if you are a nice, caring guy you can get eaten alive in this regard. (Speaking from my own experience) This hobby takes away that power where you can have it on a whim. And it helps even more that the women can be very attractive, down to earth and perform better than non-pros. In my mind if I ever choose to enter a relationship with a woman now, it's more than what she offers than "just sex". Such as her drive and ambition in life, her level of compassion and ability to nurture, her intelligence. So in my mind this hobby actually improves my filtering system and increases my standards.
What strikes me about this thread is that many of you guys can be honest about what you/we want. If it's sex, just call it!
The great thing about the hobby is that it teaches you to separate sex from relationships. You can always buy sex. You can always buy the illusion of love. I suppose it can make you appreciate a real relationship and what can't be bought.
The great thing about the hobby is that it teaches you to separate sex from relationships. You can always buy sex. You can always buy the illusion of love. I suppose it can make you appreciate a real relationship and what can't be bought.
Is efficient better? Is efficiency the only criteria. If you're sick, or on your deathbed do you think your fav sp is gonna be there. The love of a good woman makes a man better, I'm about the least sentimental person you're ever likely to meet, but in my experience, the cliche is actually true.
How many are fortunate to find the "love of a good woman"? I know exactly what you mean - I saw it with my parents but now......I don't know. Which is why guys like the OP might have a point: why look for something so rare when great sex is so easily available?
Agreed, don't really see it that often these days. Or its hard to tell what is authentic. If it is, more power to you and run with it! The fact is allot of "love of a good woman" is paid for in some way or the other as well. Where the pretense of love is hidden for some sort of indirect monetary exchange.
Instead of $240 for the hour, it's the the cost of the house, a fancy new car, trips to exotic places, paying off her credit card spending for all her shoe shopping. So it's really hard to tell what is actually for "love". Which all of that love can painfully make itself clear it was an illusion when those divorce papers pop up and everything is ripped from your soul.
So maybe if I buy an SP a house, we could seek a contractual arrangement (Which marriage is also contractual - so fair trade) she shows up on my death bed when I'm sick? Figure with average million dollar cost of a Toronto home in good neighbhourhood should be covered in that $240 an hour somewhere. I will even throw in a car to help get to the hospital.
For the record my parents are still happily married in what seems to be a monogomous relationship. So I'm not saying this is not possible. However my parents told me they had put in a shitload of work in their marriage. And have warned me in itself be careful what you call "love".
Instead of $240 for the hour, it's the the cost of the house, a fancy new car, trips to exotic places, paying off her credit card spending for all her shoe shopping. So it's really hard to tell what is actually for "love". Which all of that love can painfully make itself clear it was an illusion when those divorce papers pop up and everything is ripped from your soul.
So maybe if I buy an SP a house, we could seek a contractual arrangement (Which marriage is also contractual - so fair trade) she shows up on my death bed when I'm sick? Figure with average million dollar cost of a Toronto home in good neighbhourhood should be covered in that $240 an hour somewhere. I will even throw in a car to help get to the hospital.
For the record my parents are still happily married in what seems to be a monogomous relationship. So I'm not saying this is not possible. However my parents told me they had put in a shitload of work in their marriage. And have warned me in itself be careful what you call "love".
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I get the point, but you can apply that to anything in my life: why try so hard to reach one's potential when it's easier to be comfortable and just lower your expectations. People who excel, (in anything) don't think that way. Relationships are hard work. Doing the work doesn't guarantee success, but not trying guarantees failure (like everything else in life).
If you want to reduce all relationships to a cost/benefit analysis, (which is perfectly valid), then escorts are the way to go.
That's only one perspective, there are others....
I've had sex with the same girl day after day, year after year and it's been in a word, awesome. Likely why we've been together for so many years. I could never see myself being happy paying for sex by the hour.
This ^^^^^
I am hopeful that one day we can live in a world without so many sexual hang ups and that paying for sex will be as respectful a lifestyle as any other. I may not live long enough to see it but I think there has been real progress.
Yes there are recent legal moves to curtail it but I see that as the last gasp of the losing side much like the defence of marriage laws were the last defence against gay marriage.
That's unfortunate for you.
My ideal is to have a solid relationship with good sex at home, and regular pay-for-play sex on the side.
Do you mind if I use that as an introduction for my online dating profile?
Being in a relationship where everything is complete is the ultimate, but relatively rare:
companionship, love, great sex, friendship.
The 50% divorce rate in Ontario is testament to that.
That's why I take the modular approach: you can try to fulfill all of the above but, realistically, it's extremely rare that it's going to happen with the same person.
I accept that I'm not going to have a 'friends with benefits' relationship. So I can find friendship and companionship with one (physical traits are not so important with the latter) and paid sex with another. So There: my emotional and physical needs fulfilled.
companionship, love, great sex, friendship.
The 50% divorce rate in Ontario is testament to that.
That's why I take the modular approach: you can try to fulfill all of the above but, realistically, it's extremely rare that it's going to happen with the same person.
I accept that I'm not going to have a 'friends with benefits' relationship. So I can find friendship and companionship with one (physical traits are not so important with the latter) and paid sex with another. So There: my emotional and physical needs fulfilled.
No, not unfortunate at all... I have a solid relationship and good sex with my wife who enjoys going swing clubs and inviting her female friends into our bedroom. I could easily afford pay-for-play sex on the side (and there's a couple who advertise here I'd definitely put on my TDL if I had one) but I choose not to. I might go for the odd lap dance or visit a MP but that's maybe once or twice a year.
I have no problem with what you or anyone anyone else chooses to do. I also don't think it's unfortunate that your wife isn't into MFF threesomes. Some are just luckier than others I guess.
Well said.
But if someone likes the very reasonably-priced fantasy, of picking up a gorgeous gal at a club and having sex afterwards (on the same night), go to Havana, Cuba.
That being said, and whatever else mentioned above, if you meet the right gal who is also fun, a true relationship can be completely fulfilling than a hobbyist existence.
Perhaps, you can have both by being friends with non-pros (or pros!) and hobbying.
I find dating in Toronto to be emotionally taxing. Trying to talk to girl, getting her number, text games and mind games. I was at a singles event and was talking to this girl who was average looking. But she thought she was an angel and she was going on and on about herself and as I listened to her I was thinking to myself, " I just slept with gorgeous 20 yr old SP yesterday why am I even talking to you." I excused myself to go the washroom.
