Why do we do what we do?
- Thread starter Ross Eyerie
- Start date
Instinct and reason
So the sex urge says "go for it" and the rationale brain is left trying to make sense out of it all. Or, more likely, rationalize it to the point of acceptance. Which makes rationality subservient to desire and thereby meaningless.
Hm. Nope. Can't buy that. Autonomic reactions, e.g. pupil dilation and sudden erections, may not be controllable, but the decision to proceed is the essence of freedom. Choice is not an impulse.
On a side note, experiments in brain functioning and consciousness suggest that decisions are made mechanically. Consciousness plays no part. This is such an odd result that one scientist (Libet) proposed that the role of consciousness is to inhibit unwise decisions. But that would require a conscious decision to inhibit an unconscious decision. You can't have it both ways.
Maybe we ARE automatons. But it seems odd that anyone would spend a lifetime proving that E=M*c*c if the essence of humanity is mindless impulses.
I think, therefore I am.
I think I think too much!
I think I need a beer ... and ...
So the sex urge says "go for it" and the rationale brain is left trying to make sense out of it all. Or, more likely, rationalize it to the point of acceptance. Which makes rationality subservient to desire and thereby meaningless.
Hm. Nope. Can't buy that. Autonomic reactions, e.g. pupil dilation and sudden erections, may not be controllable, but the decision to proceed is the essence of freedom. Choice is not an impulse.
On a side note, experiments in brain functioning and consciousness suggest that decisions are made mechanically. Consciousness plays no part. This is such an odd result that one scientist (Libet) proposed that the role of consciousness is to inhibit unwise decisions. But that would require a conscious decision to inhibit an unconscious decision. You can't have it both ways.
Maybe we ARE automatons. But it seems odd that anyone would spend a lifetime proving that E=M*c*c if the essence of humanity is mindless impulses.
I think, therefore I am.
I think I think too much!
I think I need a beer ... and ...
I hate playing the game. Was never good at it. even though I am good looking enough to excell, I wasnt born with the gift of the gab - therefore- I suck!
Game involves too much time and even more frustration (I get stood up by civilian chicks more often than I get dates.)
SP's became much much easier.
And I love sampling different, large, natural titties!
Game involves too much time and even more frustration (I get stood up by civilian chicks more often than I get dates.)
SP's became much much easier.
And I love sampling different, large, natural titties!
Scoring
I, also, have been, well, quite the dweeb when it comes do dating.
I came across a book in the library on how to score with women. I flipped through it quickly. The author took a course in New York city by a guy who teaches men how to pick up women for sex. It sounds like a crock of s***, but it actually works to some degree. The "students" practiced the tips and tricks in the real world and were successful at it. But I can't help but wonder if the woman who were successfully "picked up" were waiting for someone, anyone, to approach them. Good technique or not, you were going to score. The flip side of the coin is that the trainer, and many of the men who took followed his advice, found the whole experience became shallow.
There is an interesting part in the book where the author meets Paris Hilton. The exchange is short, but interesting.
The book is on sale at fine book stores everywhere.
I, also, have been, well, quite the dweeb when it comes do dating.
I came across a book in the library on how to score with women. I flipped through it quickly. The author took a course in New York city by a guy who teaches men how to pick up women for sex. It sounds like a crock of s***, but it actually works to some degree. The "students" practiced the tips and tricks in the real world and were successful at it. But I can't help but wonder if the woman who were successfully "picked up" were waiting for someone, anyone, to approach them. Good technique or not, you were going to score. The flip side of the coin is that the trainer, and many of the men who took followed his advice, found the whole experience became shallow.
There is an interesting part in the book where the author meets Paris Hilton. The exchange is short, but interesting.
The book is on sale at fine book stores everywhere.
mildandlazy said:
Uh, dude. You failed to mention the name of the book.
It didn't perchance be called, "Neurolinguistic Programming" did it?
I don't remember the title, but it wasn't related to NLP. Although I think one technique described using tin cans hooked up to wires followed by a lecture on how casual sex reveals latent engrams.
Why do I bother answering "Why?"
There seems to be a lack of interest to answering this question. Hm.
Is this the same thing as explaining a joke. If we explain why, will it stop being fun?
Here's my ad hoc list of possible reasons, just for the hell of it.
1) Rejuvenation
2) One possible response to the never ending stream of youthful feminine images in the media.
3) Incongruity of the significant other in comparison to point 2.
4) Lack of response on the home front.
5) Lack of a home front.
5) Cuz you can.
6) An inexplicable enchantment with the female form at its best.
7) The incomparable sensation of a woman's skin ...
8) ... especially when experienced by the entirety of one's own skin.
9) Cuz you're not supposed to.
10) Cuz you might go insane if you don't
11) Cuz the smile on your face needs maintenance.
12) Cuz the liklihood of addressing any of the above outside of a paid arrangement has a probability value near zero.
13) Cuz the liklihood of addressing any of the above outside of a paid arrangement, without incurring divorce court costs, has a probability value near zero.
14) Cuz the liklihood of addressing any of the above outside of a paid arrangement, without incurring relationship baggage, has a probability value near zero.
15) Cuz there is some measure of control.
16) Cuz we don't know that if we stopped paying, they'd give it away for free! (OK. that one's dubious).
17) Cuz evolution demands countless attempts at procreation no matter how fruitless
18) Cuz nothing really matters anyway so why the f*** not.
Why men philander is a question worth pondering seriously. Hits at the heart of one's humanity. And womanhood for that matter.
Point 2 I find irksome. What the heck is it about the image of a young woman that is so innately captivating? And why only those of a particular form, e.g. slender or whatever turns you on?
Why is a sunset beautiful? Why do we enjoy music? What IS music?
Maybe the living of it is better than the pondering of it, with apologies to Socrates. "The unexamined life is not worth living." Or better yet, "The unlived life is not worth examining."
Regards
There seems to be a lack of interest to answering this question. Hm.
Is this the same thing as explaining a joke. If we explain why, will it stop being fun?
Here's my ad hoc list of possible reasons, just for the hell of it.
1) Rejuvenation
2) One possible response to the never ending stream of youthful feminine images in the media.
3) Incongruity of the significant other in comparison to point 2.
4) Lack of response on the home front.
5) Lack of a home front.
5) Cuz you can.
6) An inexplicable enchantment with the female form at its best.
7) The incomparable sensation of a woman's skin ...
8) ... especially when experienced by the entirety of one's own skin.
9) Cuz you're not supposed to.
10) Cuz you might go insane if you don't
11) Cuz the smile on your face needs maintenance.
12) Cuz the liklihood of addressing any of the above outside of a paid arrangement has a probability value near zero.
13) Cuz the liklihood of addressing any of the above outside of a paid arrangement, without incurring divorce court costs, has a probability value near zero.
14) Cuz the liklihood of addressing any of the above outside of a paid arrangement, without incurring relationship baggage, has a probability value near zero.
15) Cuz there is some measure of control.
16) Cuz we don't know that if we stopped paying, they'd give it away for free! (OK. that one's dubious).
17) Cuz evolution demands countless attempts at procreation no matter how fruitless
18) Cuz nothing really matters anyway so why the f*** not.
Why men philander is a question worth pondering seriously. Hits at the heart of one's humanity. And womanhood for that matter.
Point 2 I find irksome. What the heck is it about the image of a young woman that is so innately captivating? And why only those of a particular form, e.g. slender or whatever turns you on?
Why is a sunset beautiful? Why do we enjoy music? What IS music?
Maybe the living of it is better than the pondering of it, with apologies to Socrates. "The unexamined life is not worth living." Or better yet, "The unlived life is not worth examining."
Regards
mildandlazy said:There seems to be a lack of interest to answering this question. Hm.
Is this the same thing as explaining a joke. If we explain why, will it stop being fun?
Here's my ad hoc list of possible reasons, just for the hell of it.
1) Rejuvenation
2) One possible response to the never ending stream of youthful feminine images in the media.
3) Incongruity of the significant other in comparison to point 2.
4) Lack of response on the home front.
5) Lack of a home front.
5) Cuz you can.
6) An inexplicable enchantment with the female form at its best.
7) The incomparable sensation of a woman's skin ...
8) ... especially when experienced by the entirety of one's own skin.
9) Cuz you're not supposed to.
10) Cuz you might go insane if you don't
11) Cuz the smile on your face needs maintenance.
12) Cuz the liklihood of addressing any of the above outside of a paid arrangement has a probability value near zero.
13) Cuz the liklihood of addressing any of the above outside of a paid arrangement, without incurring divorce court costs, has a probability value near zero.
14) Cuz the liklihood of addressing any of the above outside of a paid arrangement, without incurring relationship baggage, has a probability value near zero.
15) Cuz there is some measure of control.
16) Cuz we don't know that if we stopped paying, they'd give it away for free! (OK. that one's dubious).
17) Cuz evolution demands countless attempts at procreation no matter how fruitless
18) Cuz nothing really matters anyway so why the f*** not.
Why men philander is a question worth pondering seriously. Hits at the heart of one's humanity. And womanhood for that matter.
Point 2 I find irksome. What the heck is it about the image of a young woman that is so innately captivating? And why only those of a particular form, e.g. slender or whatever turns you on?
Why is a sunset beautiful? Why do we enjoy music? What IS music?
Maybe the living of it is better than the pondering of it, with apologies to Socrates. "The unexamined life is not worth living." Or better yet, "The unlived life is not worth examining."
Regards
Mild, you're list kicks ass, I found myself nodding with so many of your points. To go to your last paragraph, I think that sometimes a full and honest examination of why we do certain things may bring up answers that we do not want to know or cannot handle. Sometimes that has been the case for me.
However, you left off one important point: The Chemical Rush. The rush you get from seeing an Sp. There is nothing quite like being at Jane/Sheppard on a hot summer Tuesday night, outside a building that looks like its falling apart, knowing that in 15 minutes, you will having the time of your life with a complete stranger. The rush for me is addictive.
Self Knowledge
Self knowledge comes with a price. You decide how much to learn, and you decide the price.
How much about ourselves do we really know? Logic says everything. How could we be a mystery to ourselves? And yet we are. Sartre called this "bad faith". You know all the answers to the questions that you might ask, but you don't ask the question because the answer will not fit into how you see yourself. And how you see yourself is a lie. Where honesty lies is anyone's guess.
Keep asking yourself uncomfortable questions. The more answers you can live with, the stronger you become. Not to mention wiser.
Frankly, very few of the experiences I have had with SPs were all that wonderful. But I was limited to the street trade when I was "hobbying". (I hate that term, by the way.) A true professional might be a nice treat. So I cannot relate to the rush of waiting outside a building for that moment of ecstasy. The best I came to a "rush" was when I was driving around trying to get the courage to pull up to a street walker. More like jittery nerves than a rush. These days, the nerves and the rush are almost gone. It's still a pleasure to have my fun, but I'm past caring.
Self knowledge comes with a price. You decide how much to learn, and you decide the price.
How much about ourselves do we really know? Logic says everything. How could we be a mystery to ourselves? And yet we are. Sartre called this "bad faith". You know all the answers to the questions that you might ask, but you don't ask the question because the answer will not fit into how you see yourself. And how you see yourself is a lie. Where honesty lies is anyone's guess.
Keep asking yourself uncomfortable questions. The more answers you can live with, the stronger you become. Not to mention wiser.
Frankly, very few of the experiences I have had with SPs were all that wonderful. But I was limited to the street trade when I was "hobbying". (I hate that term, by the way.) A true professional might be a nice treat. So I cannot relate to the rush of waiting outside a building for that moment of ecstasy. The best I came to a "rush" was when I was driving around trying to get the courage to pull up to a street walker. More like jittery nerves than a rush. These days, the nerves and the rush are almost gone. It's still a pleasure to have my fun, but I'm past caring.
maybe it's simply not natural for men to maintain monogamous relationships, a societal norm supported by religious tradition. there are other options the world has not accepted yet. perhaps allong the same lines of how sexually supressed priests abuse young children. it is in our nature to reproduce, and so far we are the only species who have been monogamous.
but i'm not saying to go out there and cheat and fuck every girl you see, because you made a commitment to someone (in the case of a married person) and....diseases?
mischa
but i'm not saying to go out there and cheat and fuck every girl you see, because you made a commitment to someone (in the case of a married person) and....diseases?
mischa
A few more for the list
OK. Here's a few more. I guess I felt ponderous tonight. Point one strikes to buttman's point.
1) Long standing fantasies are made real rather than left to fester like wounds.
2) The varied responses and personal styles of countless women provide a glimpse into a feminine world usually kept hidden by social graces and distorted by the media.
3) Playboy, Hustler, Penthouse etc. One can view images of exquisite meals only so long before a visit to one of the finer restaurants in the area becomes mandatory.
4) Because the difference between paying for a fine meal or the fine services of a professional erotic entertainer is moot.
5) Because to act like like a fool is the sole privilege of men.
6) Because the addiction to forgiveness requires a corresponding sin.
7) Because young egos demand the illusion of sexual prowess.
8) Because wiser souls still enjoy the entertainment of the illusion.
And the beat goes ooonnn, ... and the beat goes onnnn. ....
OK. Here's a few more. I guess I felt ponderous tonight. Point one strikes to buttman's point.
1) Long standing fantasies are made real rather than left to fester like wounds.
2) The varied responses and personal styles of countless women provide a glimpse into a feminine world usually kept hidden by social graces and distorted by the media.
3) Playboy, Hustler, Penthouse etc. One can view images of exquisite meals only so long before a visit to one of the finer restaurants in the area becomes mandatory.
4) Because the difference between paying for a fine meal or the fine services of a professional erotic entertainer is moot.
5) Because to act like like a fool is the sole privilege of men.
6) Because the addiction to forgiveness requires a corresponding sin.
7) Because young egos demand the illusion of sexual prowess.
8) Because wiser souls still enjoy the entertainment of the illusion.
And the beat goes ooonnn, ... and the beat goes onnnn. ....
nah... its just Nature...we are simply programmed to spread the seed and we give in to the "thirst"
I could try to explain it with a myriad of reasons...but women could use those same reasons yet they dont quite have the same urge we do (well not to the same magnitude)...and they dont give in as much as we do.
So theres the difference between guys like us and other guys who dont fuck around....we give in to the thirst and they dont... but that doesnt mean they dont get the thirst as well...it all starts with the "thirst" instilled in us by Nature
I could try to explain it with a myriad of reasons...but women could use those same reasons yet they dont quite have the same urge we do (well not to the same magnitude)...and they dont give in as much as we do.
So theres the difference between guys like us and other guys who dont fuck around....we give in to the thirst and they dont... but that doesnt mean they dont get the thirst as well...it all starts with the "thirst" instilled in us by Nature
Kinsey
I saw the movie about the life of Kinsey, the psychologist who studied sexuality. Amazing what lies beneath the covers, so to speak. People do a LOT more than you might think.
I saw the movie about the life of Kinsey, the psychologist who studied sexuality. Amazing what lies beneath the covers, so to speak.
People do a LOT more than you might think.Evolution?
I don't quite buy the "nature made me do it" rationale. It fails to explain teh huge diversity of behavior. Gay sex makes no sense. Pedophilia is absurd. And if these are just bad wiring; deviations based on brain malformations; then perhaps so is everything else except procreative monogamous sex.
I think there is much we manufacture ourselves out of all of this.
Maybe we're just trying to stay alive! Sex sure makes ME feel alive. The absence of it and, far worse, the absence of the need for it, feels a little too much like an early death.
I don't quite buy the "nature made me do it" rationale. It fails to explain teh huge diversity of behavior. Gay sex makes no sense. Pedophilia is absurd. And if these are just bad wiring; deviations based on brain malformations; then perhaps so is everything else except procreative monogamous sex.
I think there is much we manufacture ourselves out of all of this.
Maybe we're just trying to stay alive! Sex sure makes ME feel alive. The absence of it and, far worse, the absence of the need for it, feels a little too much like an early death.
Because it is cheaper then going out for diner a couple times just to get in some snotty Toronto girls pants ( and then there is no guarantee of that ) & easier then playing the games… You know what you are going to get.
I would rather have some wine at home go to a SP. Over & done with no BS and and you go home happy.
I would rather have some wine at home go to a SP. Over & done with no BS and and you go home happy.
Not for nothing...
...but if the only reason you go out with "snotty Toronto girls" is to get in their pants, they more than likely can see and smell you coming from a mile away, hence why you get what you are going to get....
Personally, I can't fathom how dating and seeing an SP are substitutes for each other (each would seem to have a specific purpose almost wholly separate from the other), but I am certainly clear that many others do.
cliff1 said:
...but if the only reason you go out with "snotty Toronto girls" is to get in their pants, they more than likely can see and smell you coming from a mile away, hence why you get what you are going to get....
Personally, I can't fathom how dating and seeing an SP are substitutes for each other (each would seem to have a specific purpose almost wholly separate from the other), but I am certainly clear that many others do.
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