Same could be said for most SW’s. Those ladies that post their actual pictures are in the minority. So how would you ever know a lady you just met at the church social had previously been a SP for the past 10 years?
What makes a man want a sex worker as their significant other?
- Thread starter Tashki
- Start date
Agreed. There are so many gals in the industry that I wish I had met under different circumstances. Once you see them as a client it ruins everything even though the chemistry may be amazing.
The successful women in this industry are extremely desirable beyond just sex. These ladies are self-disciplined, driven and independent. They have goals far beyond this job and sacrifice a lot to meet those goals.
At the end of the day to me being an escort is nothing but a job. I wouldn't seek out a woman specifically because she was in the industry but I can thing of more than a handful I would cherish the opportunity to be in a relationship with.
I have met lots of wonderful women in the industry. They are sweet and lovely and I have enjoyed spending time with (almost) every one of them.
Then just a little over three years ago I met my ATF. From the first visit the chemistry and the sex were off the charts. I have never met anyone in my entire life that I enjoy being around as much as this lady. If I wasn't already married, twenty-six years older than she is, if she wasn't already in a relationship, etc. I would marry her in an instant--what she does for a living wouldn't make a bit of difference. It's not going to happen in this lifetime, unfortunately, but I can always dream, and keep seeing her as often as I can.
Then just a little over three years ago I met my ATF. From the first visit the chemistry and the sex were off the charts. I have never met anyone in my entire life that I enjoy being around as much as this lady. If I wasn't already married, twenty-six years older than she is, if she wasn't already in a relationship, etc. I would marry her in an instant--what she does for a living wouldn't make a bit of difference. It's not going to happen in this lifetime, unfortunately, but I can always dream, and keep seeing her as often as I can.
Pardon the expletive but what a fucking great post! I love it!! You might as well be speaking on my behalf. I'm 28 years older that the individual I'm spending time with and she humbles me like no other ever has. What can I say except that Life is good!
Rigel
There's two completely different worlds here:
1) You attempt to develop a relationship together while she is actively a sex worker
2) You attempt to develop a relationship together after her career as a sex worker is completed
1) You attempt to develop a relationship together while she is actively a sex worker
2) You attempt to develop a relationship together after her career as a sex worker is completed
I've never really understood this.
I have SPs I like spending time with and whom I like to think enjoy my company but at the end of the day, I'm realistic about what's happening between us.
Case in point, a lady I had been seeing regularly for a couple years decided she didn't want to see me anymore and while I did feel disappointed, again, I realized the nature of our "relationship" and just moved on.
I have SPs I like spending time with and whom I like to think enjoy my company but at the end of the day, I'm realistic about what's happening between us.
Case in point, a lady I had been seeing regularly for a couple years decided she didn't want to see me anymore and while I did feel disappointed, again, I realized the nature of our "relationship" and just moved on.
I think I've joined this club too. Would I marry my all time favourite SP? In a heartbeat, if I wasn't already married... She knows it too
I think the better question is if she'd marry me... that's still up for debate!
I’m not interested in marriage, I don’t even want a girlfriend. The baggage that comes with a committed relationship would severely limit my ability to pay to see whoever I can afford.
I have favourite SP’s I see regularly, and it not my business if they have a boyfriend or are married.
I suspect some have SO’s that they don’t admit to. Whether they hide it from their SO or not is their choice.
The part that bothers me is the SOs who live off the SPs income. And I’ve heard of the horror stories of how that happens without he SP even knowing her fiancée is stealing all her assets and foricing her to work. Sometimes she thinks she’s happy ‘helping him out’, then he gets abusive and leaves her with nothing, or she leaves him and feels stupid for being taken advantage of.
This can also happen when an SP lets her bbf help her out. I’ve seen girls taken advantage of by other girls in this industry.
Money over rides friendships. Be careful who you trust.
I have favourite SP’s I see regularly, and it not my business if they have a boyfriend or are married.
I suspect some have SO’s that they don’t admit to. Whether they hide it from their SO or not is their choice.
The part that bothers me is the SOs who live off the SPs income. And I’ve heard of the horror stories of how that happens without he SP even knowing her fiancée is stealing all her assets and foricing her to work. Sometimes she thinks she’s happy ‘helping him out’, then he gets abusive and leaves her with nothing, or she leaves him and feels stupid for being taken advantage of.
This can also happen when an SP lets her bbf help her out. I’ve seen girls taken advantage of by other girls in this industry.
Money over rides friendships. Be careful who you trust.
Every relationship is different, but the truth is that the vast majority of relationships are unequal ones. One person is usually stronger or more autonomous than the other, more dependent one. It's quite rare to find a couple who are equally in love and devoted to one another.
With sexworkers that dynamic plays out in in different ways: the husband or boyfriend can be a glorified pimp who really loves the cash more than the girl, or he can be essentially a cuckold who's so in love that he accepts her job and probably doubts that he could get a hotter girl anyway. These are extreme examples, I'm sure there's many increments in between.
Most relationships are kind of fucked up. Sexworkers relationships are probably at-least as screwed up as anyone else's.
With sexworkers that dynamic plays out in in different ways: the husband or boyfriend can be a glorified pimp who really loves the cash more than the girl, or he can be essentially a cuckold who's so in love that he accepts her job and probably doubts that he could get a hotter girl anyway. These are extreme examples, I'm sure there's many increments in between.
Most relationships are kind of fucked up. Sexworkers relationships are probably at-least as screwed up as anyone else's.
Interesting topic
1) I know at least 4 couples in Phoenix in decades old great relationships were she is a sexworker and he is totally supportive, no jealousy issues, just wants her to be safe. In each case the man is a professional making good income so its not about the sexwork income. I don't believe any are married - which to me is an outdated unneeded "institution". You should be together because you want to me not because you have a "certificate."
2) I've had "real" relationships with sexworkers over the decades sometimes first as a client and sometimes just them contacting me since I am well known with the Private List in Phoenix for decades. Some however I wasn't that attracted to since I am so picky and spoiled by so many young attractive dancers/escorts etc. Sadly the Phoenix relationships ended either because she moved out of state (huge legal issues in Phoenix) or she had drug issues I just do not choose to deal with. I am known for my diet coke or Pepsi at strip clubs, never smoked and the only drug I take is caffeine in coffee! I am also not into long-distance relationships which brings me to Canada
3) Have had "real friends" with a few Canadian gals but the fact I am only there a few times a year doesn't make for a lasting real relationship. One was decades ago in Victoria B.C. before I got hooked on Toronto!
4) Every time I have gotten involved as real friend (vs client) of a sexworker it was always her wanting to get together. I never suggest it or try and assume anything more than a commercial exchange unless she wants more.
5) Since my interest is more the intimacy side vs the usual just sex stuff, some women are attracted to that aspect. However, what is hard is I am spoiled by women under say 35 (vs me about twice the age) with smoother skin, smaller breasts and not overweight! That limits my real world options. I also find my type far easier in Canada than in the U.S. (ah especially those sensual Eastern Europeans!). I also value personality and a "real" connection even if just for an hour which I have had in both Phoenix and seems even easier in Canada.
Having given up on the U.S. escort world (with prices I have no interest in paying) I plan to try some of the younger women/older men sites after dong a lot of research. Would only date in Phoenix, not in need of a real relationship but would be nice like I had in my much younger days!
Making my "distance" issue even worse, I am considering my June 2018 trip going to FKK clubs in Germany vs Toronto. I like the more casual get to know you with all the naked women before doing sex and the reports I am reading about the top clubs. Although I may wind up going through Toronto depending on airline on the way. And I have a Canadian long-term friend that may perhaps join my so we may meet up in Toronto first! Of course all is perfectly legal in Germany.
Toronto vs Germany may depend on finances. Long expensive flight Pheonix to Franfurt but FKK costs probably spend less or the same vs Toronto escorts and hotel costs comparable or a bit less in Germany - although Euro is at about 17% premium to $US vs still big discount from $US to $CDN.
1) I know at least 4 couples in Phoenix in decades old great relationships were she is a sexworker and he is totally supportive, no jealousy issues, just wants her to be safe. In each case the man is a professional making good income so its not about the sexwork income. I don't believe any are married - which to me is an outdated unneeded "institution". You should be together because you want to me not because you have a "certificate."
2) I've had "real" relationships with sexworkers over the decades sometimes first as a client and sometimes just them contacting me since I am well known with the Private List in Phoenix for decades. Some however I wasn't that attracted to since I am so picky and spoiled by so many young attractive dancers/escorts etc. Sadly the Phoenix relationships ended either because she moved out of state (huge legal issues in Phoenix) or she had drug issues I just do not choose to deal with. I am known for my diet coke or Pepsi at strip clubs, never smoked and the only drug I take is caffeine in coffee! I am also not into long-distance relationships which brings me to Canada
3) Have had "real friends" with a few Canadian gals but the fact I am only there a few times a year doesn't make for a lasting real relationship. One was decades ago in Victoria B.C. before I got hooked on Toronto!
4) Every time I have gotten involved as real friend (vs client) of a sexworker it was always her wanting to get together. I never suggest it or try and assume anything more than a commercial exchange unless she wants more.
5) Since my interest is more the intimacy side vs the usual just sex stuff, some women are attracted to that aspect. However, what is hard is I am spoiled by women under say 35 (vs me about twice the age) with smoother skin, smaller breasts and not overweight! That limits my real world options. I also find my type far easier in Canada than in the U.S. (ah especially those sensual Eastern Europeans!). I also value personality and a "real" connection even if just for an hour which I have had in both Phoenix and seems even easier in Canada.
Having given up on the U.S. escort world (with prices I have no interest in paying) I plan to try some of the younger women/older men sites after dong a lot of research. Would only date in Phoenix, not in need of a real relationship but would be nice like I had in my much younger days!
Making my "distance" issue even worse, I am considering my June 2018 trip going to FKK clubs in Germany vs Toronto. I like the more casual get to know you with all the naked women before doing sex and the reports I am reading about the top clubs. Although I may wind up going through Toronto depending on airline on the way. And I have a Canadian long-term friend that may perhaps join my so we may meet up in Toronto first! Of course all is perfectly legal in Germany.
Toronto vs Germany may depend on finances. Long expensive flight Pheonix to Franfurt but FKK costs probably spend less or the same vs Toronto escorts and hotel costs comparable or a bit less in Germany - although Euro is at about 17% premium to $US vs still big discount from $US to $CDN.
Got you by a year. 29 year difference with an ATF who retired/disappeared until one day at lunchtime 3-4 years later in a coffee shop women behind me called me by first name. Reconnected and the chemistry was still there. From two different worlds, but if circumstances were to change, we'd probably give a chance. I know she'd be on top of it.
Well the only way you'll find that out is by asking her!I think I've joined this club too. Would I marry my all time favourite SP? In a heartbeat, if I wasn't already married... She knows it too
I think the better question is if she'd marry me... that's still up for debate!
. It's a great club to be in! Every second that I spend with my favorite SP is time well spent. I'm sure that if you're like me then you're so excited that you can't sleep the night before! You know I wish I would have happened on this thread in the spring. Reading through some posts particularly the one by RubbeRagdoll where she shares some really good insight that all would do well to know especially the point about not being advised to pursuing more. You have to really consider the consequences of going down that road. Sadly there are some things that just can't be undone.
Rigel
How do you know if she is ever truly retired? Come Xmas time each year she's suddenly flush with cash to buy gifts but you have no idea where she got it from. But you can take a good guess...
I think the whole point is you know she's an active SW and you are ok with it. Clearly it makes no difference to the guy who's gal is doing it without his knowledge.
It’s been alluded to, but not stated outright, maybe the guy loves her?
Women who do sex work are just that, women. We’ve all met amazing women who are smart, funny, caring, and sexy! Of course a guy who would engage in such a relationship would have to have minimal jealousy, be self confident and be able to separate sex work from relationship sex. That would be a tough one, but in real life, all significant relationships require some accommodation of each other in terms of work, strengths, weaknesses, hopes and fears. It would be challenging, but given the right circumstances and right people, I’ve no doubt that successful and rewarding relationships can thrive between a couple, one of whom does sex work.
I am afraid I have joined this club too except that I am pretty sure she'd not marry me for all the differences between us. For one thing, being an intelligent and kind-hearted person, she'll not want to break up my marriage - that I am quite sure. But for now, we are enjoying each other's company as much as we could.I think I've joined this club too. Would I marry my all time favourite SP? In a heartbeat, if I wasn't already married... She knows it too
I think the better question is if she'd marry me... that's still up for debate!
One my long time regular SP told me once (and she was very successful provider):
"Top level escort business is not about sex. It is about client dream, client fantasy. It may be dream to be in love again, to have close friend, to have young attractive lover who admires him... Satisfy this client fantasy and you will have loyal regular who always returns to you"
Many posts in this thread look like confirmation of this idea.
"Top level escort business is not about sex. It is about client dream, client fantasy. It may be dream to be in love again, to have close friend, to have young attractive lover who admires him... Satisfy this client fantasy and you will have loyal regular who always returns to you"
Many posts in this thread look like confirmation of this idea.
I'd assume not that different than when one finds out the other is having an affair
