Was I wrong to stop an appointment for no solid reason?

[The Lurker]

Sorry tboy your a dink. The tough love thing is so old. If you were such a great authority you would not be here. Be supportive or be gone. It's one thing to instruct, but quite another to do so while trying to seem superior.

While she maybe not ready for the biz, you're pejorative tone is annoying.

Oh an yes you will go on ignore too.

 

[a 1 player]

Angel,

Don't be sorry for asking questions and wanting advice. Yes, we can be harsh, but we can also be a great help by allowing SP's to see the types of service and personalities we desire. I agree with Tboy, $350 is no small change, more in fact than many lawyers and doctors make. For that type of money you will have to be the best of the best. Not saying that you aren't only you can answer that question, and well maybe some of us. Point being, well, reread Tboy's post. He has it bang on.

 

[tboy]

Sorry tboy your a dink. The tough love thing is so old. If you were such a great authority you would not be here. Be supportive or be gone. It's one thing to instruct, but quite another to do so while trying to seem superior.

While she maybe not ready for the biz, you're pejorative tone is annoying.

Oh an yes you will go on ignore too.

LOL oh yet another one, hey, why not stick to the topic at hand instead of commenting on someone else's comments?

As for being an authority or not be here, wtf do you think we're DOING here? I'm not advising on microbiology, I'm advising and opining on the ESCORT BIZ.....

See, like I said: when you ask for opinions/comments, you don't always get what you wish for (kind of like that rolling stones song....)

 

[The Lurker]

Well at least you not at a loss for words. I see no need for hydro to keep the house warm.

The woman did ask, yes. She may not get the answers she was looking for, true. But you do go on. Opinions are like assholes and your's stinks. Hahaha no homo.

Let the escorts advize her. You've said your peace often enough.

 

[S.C. Joe]

I think the poster saying you should work for a InCall company is right. You might get hurt-even rape-on this job. I would think most guys are cool but it only takes 1 jerk to hurt you.

Then again, if all you want is 1 or 2 dates a month or maybe even 3 or 4 a year! Be picky! Heck its your life and body, don't let anybody tell you that you need to see every guy and get many dates every week. Its your call how I see it. But be ready for some pissed off guys if you keep turning guys down.

As for your fee, well, I think its over price but so was that lady out in NY-and look now, she has it made! But then again, thats like hitting the lotto. Chances are you are going to have a guy afterwards thinking hes been ripped off.

Good luck, hope things work out for you. There is all types of men, maybe you like an older guy whos not too strong or just a smaller guy.

BTW...there might be something about meeting in public. You better be careful a nice looking little guy who seems great is not an undercover cop and busts you!

 

[Mongrel4u]

I cant beleive it but...

I'll have to agree with Tboy wholeheartedly on this one...all solid points


I should call the prince of darkness to see if his abode hath frozen over

Sorry tboy your a dink. The tough love thing is so old. If you were such a great authority you would not be here. Be supportive or be gone. It's one thing to instruct, but quite another to do so while trying to seem superior.

While she maybe not ready for the biz, you're pejorative tone is annoying.

Oh an yes you will go on ignore too.

Hes not trying to come off as superior.. just stating it as it is. Truth be told AE should count herself lucky that she has been given some straight to the point opinions/advice; this isnt the type of business to screw around in (no pun intended) and it sounds like she needs the reality of it spelled out to her before she goes and gets herself in a real undesirable situation.

 

[The Lurker]

Well we just think different then. I never thought showing people right from wrong in such a blatant fashion was cool. Lol being in senior tech. supp. I always sided with the customer and as such got in Dutch with the boss. I know I never reacted well to having reality thrown in my face. So why would someone else?

 

[Mongrel4u]

Well we just think different then. I never thought showing people right from wrong in such a blatant fashion was cool. Lol being in senior tech. supp. I always sided with the customer and as such got in Dutch with the boss. I know I never reacted well to having reality thrown in my face. So why would someone else?

Because reality is what will possibly save your ass (in this line of work) and its hard to argue with. Not to knock you but AE isnt a person with a frozen PC...bad judgment or the wrong mindset wont leave you butt naked face to face with a very irate customer who is bigger and stronger than you... not to mention that someone like you will have a lot more comfort in the law backing them up than if you were an SP (this is not to say that they wouldnt protect an SP but the sense of comfort with the law isnt quite the same).

AE's "profession" (that she attempted) is very different from yours....while the fundamentals of business remain somewhat unchanged it is still apples and oranges my friend

 

[The Lurker]

True. Tech. Supp. is not like meeting horny guys that may or may not be drunk or on some thing with in my prevue. Knowing when people may or may not react badly is something that these women need to know. She is in my opinion correct in pulling the plug in the meet. For what ever reasons. There are too many dangers to risk anything.

New or old to this biz it is not worth the risk. My only comment is that only other escorts will be able to advise her.

 

[Mongrel4u]

Her case seem to be simply that of cold feet... which indicates that she may well be not cut out for this business.

You are right the best people to advise are other colleagues.. and two have given the same comment... just delivered differently

 

[The Lurker]

Tis true, that is why I butted in with tboy. Let the ladies speak.

Oh well, hope AE has it easy in the future.

Peace out.

 

[Mongrel4u]

But this is not to say that the clients cant be a useful source of info as well.. After all these are the people who she hopes to be doing business with. If you can understand your client you are golden

 

[The Lurker]

While I can understand that view, being a client for more than 25 years. I have to say no. Knowing your client base and knowing what can happen are not the same things. Ultimately the women share the same scene and not let us guys confuse this.

 

[tboy]

I was going to back out of this, even with the support, but Lurker, as a businessperson, if you don't know what your actions/reactions do to your clients, you're doomed to failure.

Sorry, that is basic business sense to know your clients.......the good ones AND the bad ones....

 

[Angel_Eyes]

Well, the thing about asking for advice is: you don't always get what you want to hear. That is one aspect of asking for advice online, be it good and bad.

2) Your comments about meeting someone for the first time. You're referring to guys you've met in a non-business sense. Remember: you're not dating these guys, you're sleeping with them for money. A life rewarding connection isn't necessary or even desired.

3) As I suspected, his actions seemed to be more of a desire to keep the date going as hoped as opposed to threatening you in any way. Specially since you were in a coffeeshop!!!

4) At $350.00 per hour you had better shape up and quickly. That is at the upper end of the scale in Toronto and you can have truly gorgeous and amazing women for a lot less money.

5) As for getting a few customers at random and avoiding terb. If you stop dates because you're uncomfortable for an unexplained reason, you won't get many customers. It really sounds to me like you're a typical woman selecting your men with the same criteria as you would someone you want to date. I tell you, don't advertise yourself as an sp, because you're not.

6) Your "uncomfortable" feeling. Sorry, Hero is going to jump all over me again for this. But hell, I wasn't there and don't know you from sam, but sleeping with a guy for money IS an uncomfortable situation until you get a few dates under your belt. I really don't think it is fair to the CUSTOMER to have such high expectations of them. We're guys that pay for sex. Get over it. You're NOT going to meet Hugh Grant, Brad Pitt, Mr Right, or some GQ Model...that only happens in Hollywood......

Sorry, this is going to sound harsh but: I really think this is a case of a (as yet unknown to me) attractive woman who thinks she is worth more than the other extremely attractive ladies out there and thinks, hey, I'm a COURTESAN....sorry, you're not. A courtesan who demands a higher than average rate is a woman who will blow a customer's mind and have no hangups about connecting with the customer. Sure, getting along with someone makes the encounter so much better, but you're not going to marry him, date him, take him home to mom. You're going to fuck him for money and at $350.00 per hour, IMO, you'd better be prepared to fuck him like he's never been done before. (sorry, that's harsh, but read the reviews: one can have an amazing time, with some truly wonderful women for about 2/3 of her rate).

Sorry angel, as others have indicated, this business obviously isn't for you.

tboy, I do appreciate your straightforwardness, even if it is harsh.

2) I don't believe I've said that I need a great connection in order to sleep with someone for money. But what I'd like to have at least is not to be uneasy with a person. I don't think that's too much to ask to simply not have a bad/uneasy vibe/feeling with someone in order to be ok with being with them.

4) I guess I should move to New York where that would be cheap! Seriously though, I guess I'm thinking if I'm comfortable with it, then this might be a part-time occupation for me and a few customers is what I'd be looking for. Maybe in the future things will change, but a few is enough for now.

5) I may be a 'typical woman' when it comes to selecting a man to date/have as a boyfriend, but I don't ever recall saying i required a man to be like George Clooney in order to sleep with them as an escort.

6) Again I'm not sure where you get that I'm looking for only tall, dark and handsome men to sleep with? I do understand that if one is an escort that she will likely see guys that are usually average and just regular guys. Sometimes they may be abit better and sometimes a little less than average. I don't have a problem with that. What I guess I'm looking for is a minimum level of comfort, or no hint of red flags. Did the guy I meet seem personable? Yes. Was there something about him that for one reason or another made me feel uneasy? Yes. I think if that little bit wasn't there, then we wouldn't be talking about this. I guess if the next few guys I see goes the same way, then its really just me and if not, then I guess maybe I might have been right about the first guy after all.

I don't think its unreasonable if a guy said he needed an escort to have a certain level of attractiveness in order to be interested in her, so I'm wondering why its unreasonable to want to feel 'ok' with someone? To think to yourself, 'He seems alright, don't feel anything negative or bad about him. Let's go'?

Also you keep making all these assumptions about me. I'm kind of confused as to why you paint me as just another woman who thinks she's all that when you don't even know me? Even if you met a thousand other women who you think are similar to me and so I must be the same, how do you really know? Unless you're a classmate or a friend of mine (in which case I'm obviously screwed) you're judging and making assumptions about me based on 14 posts?

That's not to say that you and others might not be right to say this job isn't for me, but to say I'm this type of woman or that type of woman? Well I guess you have ESP for that.

 

[Brotherman]

Just because a guy TOUCHES a woman doesn't make it a threat.

You obviously have no idea how women work. They work on instinct and a general vibe. She does not need any reason to give as it is pre-screening interview.

And for your analogy comparing sex as a service with restaurants giving you a service and demanding a reason when the restaurant refuses to service you...man, you really are clueless about women! You may think that ordering food is just like ordering sex, but it's not! Either they are programmed that even if they are not comfortable with the person to just suck it up and do the job, or if they do meet a gentleman, they feel more at ease and relax their guard. This lady is clearly looking for a gentleman.

Man you are getting so defensive that "if a guy touches a women its not a threat" ... dude, by her standards it is a threat to her as she had told him numerous times that it was over. That's all the evidence to prove that any actions by him after she had said no would make it threatening.

 

[jazzpig]

You obviously have no idea how women work. They work on instinct and a general vibe. She does not need any reason to give as it is pre-screening interview.

And for your analogy comparing sex as a service with restaurants giving you a service and demanding a reason when the restaurant refuses to service you...man, you really are clueless about women! You may think that ordering food is just like ordering sex, but it's not! Either they are programmed that even if they are not comfortable with the person to just suck it up and do the job, or if they do meet a gentleman, they feel more at ease and relax their guard. This lady is clearly looking for a gentleman.

Man you are getting so defensive that "if a guy touches a women its not a threat" ... dude, by her standards it is a threat to her as she had told him numerous times that it was over. That's all the evidence to prove that any actions by him after she had said no would make it threatening.

Stop making shit up. He did not say "if a guy touches a woman its not a threat". He said "Just because a guy TOUCHES a woman doesn't make it a threat". There's a world of difference in those two statements. And I agree.
Why don't you read all of A.E.'s post again. You are the ones that are making a bigger deal out of it. You're all going on about how threatening he was and how threatened she felt. READ her posts.

And I don't get this nonsense that she does not need to give any reasons why she doesn't want to proceed. What kind of world do you live in?
Of course she should give him her reasons. It's the least she could do for pulling out. It's just courtesy and human decency. After all he also took time out of his day went out of his way. Granted, it's not the most comfortable thing to do, telling someone why you don't want to be with them. But hey, that's what being a decent adult is about, and that's what being a respectable SP in this business is all about.

You are so focused on her, and her feelings, and her fragility, and HER version of the story, that this other guy has become a monster to some of you. And you're doing the same to tboy.

READ THE POSTS!

 

[lolathelovely]

Have you tried one of the websites for Sugar Daddies? There are 3 or 4 of them. If you don't want to sleep with lots of men and have a relationship with the man, that might suit you better. I tried it, but it wasn't working for me. It's mostly rich married men who want a young attractive woman who will be exclusive to them for a price. It's sort of in between being a mistress and being an escort. Feel free to PM me about anything you have questions about. Remember, everyone is nervous at first.

 

[tboy]

Thanks Jazz, you said it better than I ever could!

Angel: Why did I say the things I did? Because from the sounds of it, that is what it seems to be to me, as well as others.

As for your reason for uneasiness, you yourself said there was nothing wrong with him and he was personable, pleasant etc then go on to say even you yourself didn't know what it was. The point I'm trying to make is: the customer doesn't have to be perfect, YOU do. That is what it is all about in this industry.

As for NYC rates: Those higher rates are for COURTESANS and the cream of the crop. You can also get escorts for a lot less than $350.00. Again, from the sounds of your posts I get the feeling that you think you're above and beyond the rest of the beautiful, talented women working this industry and YOU HAVEN'T EVEN SEEN ONE CLIENT YET.

Hey word of advice for you: when you plan on only having one or two clients a month, that's about right because you certainly won't get much more than that.

As for "regular or average" guys, dear, you're going to get BELOW average guys and some that you'd use the word FUGLY to describe. Hence the reason many SEE escorts. Have you been to a terb party? No offence guys but we are NOT going to be featured on Canada's Next Top Model anytime soon lol.

Tell me this: have you even looked at the various escort websites out there? Do you know who your competition is? The reason I said what I did because there are a bevy of amazing women out there but you obviously feel you're better (by far) than they are. Tell me this: why would a guy, sight unseen mind you, choose you at 1.5 times the rates of the others?

Sorry, I'm still getting the "i've got a golden pussy" vibe from you.

Here's a free lesson in business management: When you enter into a sector and are an unknown. Pricing and placing yourself at the top tier of that sector is not always the best thing to do. The typical thing to do is to offer your product or service at or below the going rate to garner business then once established and word gets out that you provide a superior product or service, then you can begin raising your rates. Hell, even Bentley and Rolls Royce sold their products at the market rate until they were established.

Sorry, but I think I can speak for others here when I say this, when we decide to see an sp, we think that there is a 99.9% chance that we will actually end up having sex with her. If I felt that upon meeting, SHE may decide for some unknown/undisclosed reason not to see me, I won't waste my time. If I wanted THAT headache I'd be surfing the dating sites......

 

[fuji]

You did nothting wrong. Plainly, you have an absolute and unquestionable right to decide whether to stop a session at any point. I agree in these cases where you stop it for "no good reason" you ought not to keep the money, but you have every right to walk away. So does the client!

If you want to run these get to know you things in the future, if it's important to you, I think possibly you should be doing it in a public place. Although it isn't right, it's pretty well known that some guys get a little weird when they are close to having sex and then denied it. People SHOULD restrain themselves and be polite and respectful, but not everyone will, and even though that is their fault you would rather not have the problem.

So maybe meet up in a coffee shop first or some other place where it's much easier to walk away if you are uncomfortable.

It does sound like this might not be for you. Perhaps you should be looking for a "sugar daddy" type relationship of some sort instead if it's important for you to develop some sort of connection with the client.

With the outcall/incall scene you get just enough time to assess whether the guy is a creep but no time to assess whether or not you are going to "click" or "get along".