I recall Letterman showing a real hairdresser ad that said "free blowjob" meaning hair dryed with blower included
His commment was "Don't forget to adjust the chair"
Time for some laughter? Please share yours...
- Thread starter Kusa
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His commment was "Don't forget to adjust the chair"
Actually, that is a good question. Takes a comedic genius to even think of it, however
there is a novel called "The Speed of Dark" so he may have stole the concept
Four answers I can think of
1 Speed of dark travels congruent with the speed of light so they travel at the same speed
2 If dark is the absence of light then darkness has a speed of zero
3 It is a non question as darkness is nothingness
4 Actually, we can only be sure that darkness is the absence of the
visible light electromagnetic spectrum. Think of dark energy and dark matter.
Darkness could be full of stuff whose existence we are unaware of
Studies have found that comedians have well above average IQs. In a study of 55 male comedians, IQs ranged from 115 to 160, with an average of 138. In a subsequent study of 14 female comedians, IQ scores were also high, ranging from 112 to 144, with an average of 126. Researchers in Austria have also found that funny people, particularly those who enjoy dark humor, have higher IQs than their less funny peers. They argue that it takes both cognitive and emotional ability to process and produce humor.
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I have composed many jokes in my life, but I haven't performed in front of an audience of strangers in more than 40 years.
Many of my jokes are not understood immediately, (or at all), by many people. Part of the joke, when told in front of a group, is the timing of the laughter.
Example with a frequent reaction delay: It was a moving experience, in deed, when the cannibal's brother came out.
Many people get angry when they hear a joke that they don't understand, perhaps assuming that the other people are laughing at them. To an extent, we are - but indirectly. Rather than ridiculing the ones who don't get it, I like to think that I'm complimenting the intelligence of those who do.
Back in the mid 1990's, the receptionist at the office where I worked once said: "Do you know that joke you told me last week? I just got it."
A lot of my jokes are like that. Dry, dark and can take a while to thinnk through. But I've had people from parties, events, meetings etc call or text me a few days later that they JUST got the joke and are still laughing. It's usually a joke that is spontaneous and based on the circumstances in that moment in time.
Lots of people have told me I should be a stand up comic but tbh, I can't be funny on cue, like you need to be if you are a professional. I need a certiain type of person or group aand circumstances that give me feedback for my sense of humour to thrive. And I also can''t remember a joke if I thought of it ten minutes before!
Nothing better than making people laugh! I even laugh when I see Chucklehead mitch adding his
to everything.
Click here to watch The Andy Kaufman Show, aired on PBS Soundstage in 1983.
Kaufman interviewing his former girlfriend Elayne Boosler.
Click here to download a higher quality divX .avi DVD rip.
Kaufman interviewing his former girlfriend Elayne Boosler.
Click here to download a higher quality divX .avi DVD rip.
Kaufman's comical mission: to explore strange new worlds; to seek out new life and new civilizations; to boldly go where no comical mind has gone before!
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Similar: A pair of women's panties with the phrase Gnaw then Enter.
Click here to listen to a joke told by Brian Doyle-Murray, and episode 15 of Flash Bazbo: Space Explorer.
Nearly complete collection of The National Lampoon Radio Hour , (1973-74):
Welcome Back the Death Penalty Show
The Canadian Show
I think these are the same ones that I got on demonoid about fifteen years ago. My favorite sketch, "King Faisal", was removed from the episode with stand-up comedy auditions, but it is included in one of the compilation episodes.
I used to listen to this on Sunday nights when I was in grade 8. Most of the humour hasn't aged well, but there are some great moments. Many of the original cast of Saturday Night Live were part of this.
The National Lampoon Radio Hour : National Lampoon : Free Download, Borrow, and Streaming : Internet Archive
The National Lampoon Radio Hour was a comedy radio show which was created, produced and written by staff from National Lampoon magazine.The show ran weekly,...
archive.org
Welcome Back the Death Penalty Show
The Canadian Show
I think these are the same ones that I got on demonoid about fifteen years ago. My favorite sketch, "King Faisal", was removed from the episode with stand-up comedy auditions, but it is included in one of the compilation episodes.
I used to listen to this on Sunday nights when I was in grade 8. Most of the humour hasn't aged well, but there are some great moments. Many of the original cast of Saturday Night Live were part of this.
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A man walks into a nightclub with a beautiful girl on his arm. The show begins and the comedian comes out for his first show of the evening. The comedian says "A man walks into a nightclub with a beautiful girl on his arm. The show begins and the comedian comes out for his second show of the evening. The show begins and the comedian says "A man walks into a nightclub with a beautiful girl on his arm". Just then a man in the front row stands up and says "I think I've heard this before". The comedian says "Maybe you caught my first show of the evening". The man says "No, I just walked in here". The comedian says "Well it was a guy looked just like you - walked in with a beautiful girl on his arm, could have been your twin brother". The man says "My twin brother's dead". The comedian says "What is this, a wake?". The man says "I don't have to stand for this". And he stands up and he walks outside. And the comedian says "Are you out there? I can hear you breathing.". The man says "I'm holding my breath". The comedian says "Well I'm holding you wife". Just then the man says "That's not my wife". And he walks back into the nightclub with another beautiful girl on his arm. "Who's that lady I'm seeing you with" the comedian says. The man says "This is my wife. That other lady is my dead twin brother's wife. You can take her if you want her". And the comedian says "Not unless you say please". Just then, a man walks into a nightclub with a tattoo of a beautiful girl on his arm eating elbow macaroni. The comedian says "Is that girl from Italy?". The man says "No just hungry". Just then a man walks into the nightclub, he comes riding into the nightclub, on a pony, with a feather stuck in his hat. "What do you call that?" the comedian asks. "An entrance" the man says "But forget that". "Just give me a beer and give my pony a jockey". The bartender says "I think that pony's had enough already". "Well make it a short jockey" the man says. "And while you're at it give that lady's lawyer some briefs". The lady stands up and says "I can defend myself, your Honor". And the lawyer says "But I'll defend her honor, your Honor". The judge says "Well on her or off her, make up your mind". The comic says "Definitely on her, that's the best offer I've had all day". "Well take it or leave it" says the judge. "Couldn't we just drop it?" says the comedian. He says "Well you better drop leaflets before you bomb". And the comedian says "I'm already bombing". He says "Maybe it's your material". He says "You don't think it fits?". He says "Well it could be let out a little". The comedian says "How much do you think it will cost me?". He says "It'll cost you an arm and a leg". The comic says "Well listen, could you put it on the cuff?". The tailor says "I'll tell you what I'll do. We'll forget the leg and I'll just charge you an arm". And a beautiful arm it is. "OK" says the comedian and the tailor cuts off the comedian's arm and gives him the suit. The tailor calls his girlfriend and asks her to go out on the town with him in order to celebrate. He calls on his girlfriend and gives her the beautiful arm as a gift. She wears it around her neck just like a stole and they go out on the town. The man walks into a nightclub with a beautiful arm on his girl. The show begins and the one-armed comedian comes out for his last show of the evening. He does his act, and the audience stands up and gives him a hand.
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