My brush with a civilian

[Robert Mugabe]

Last time I tried was several years ago. Stepped right up to one and asked her out. Her response was "well good for you for putting yourself out there, but I think I will pass".
So years later, today, I was going to the mall close by work and saw the most gorgeous Canadian Chinese woman about 35 years old in yoga pants and a skinny top muscle shirt, carrying her yoga mat in a sleeve coming from the yoga place in the mall, obviously. I averted my gaze away from her camel toe and side tracked away from where I was going. Beer store to get one can, and followed her into the grocery store. She caught me checking her out and glanced back at me. I played it fairly cool. She was talking to somebody on her phone as she was in the meat section and I was just kind of stalking her in a polite manner. We kept crossing paths in the store and found ourselves side by side at the self check out. Two of the machines were down and she approached me in a friendly way, saying the machines were broken. In my most polite and non threatening manner, I agreed and left it at that. We were both checking out our stuff at close registers and I let her go. She was exactly what I was looking for.
Now I get flooded with negative self talk. Undeserving loser. Too old. Boyish man. and on and on. These days you think you are being offensive by trying to make a cold contact, but in all fairness. Animals on the hunt have to take their chances. What is so wrong with respectfully approaching a woman and asking her out. unimpressive resume aside.
End result was one beer. A computer and no date, or failed try.
Fuck.!

 

[NotADcotor]

she was in the meat section

 

[shack]

Last time I tried was several years ago. Stepped right up to one and asked her out. Her response was "well good for you for putting yourself out there, but I think I will pass".
So years later, today, I was going to the mall close by work and saw the most gorgeous Canadian Chinese woman about 35 years old in yoga pants and a skinny top muscle shirt, carrying her yoga mat in a sleeve coming from the yoga place in the mall, obviously. I averted my gaze away from her camel toe and side tracked away from where I was going. Beer store to get one can, and followed her into the grocery store. She caught me checking her out and glanced back at me. I played it fairly cool. She was talking to somebody on her phone as she was in the meat section and I was just kind of stalking her in a polite manner. We kept crossing paths in the store and found ourselves side by side at the self check out. Two of the machines were down and she approached me in a friendly way, saying the machines were broken. In my most polite and non threatening manner, I agreed and left it at that. We were both checking out our stuff at close registers and I let her go. She was exactly what I was looking for.
Now I get flooded with negative self talk. Undeserving loser. Too old. Boyish man. and on and on. These days you think you are being offensive by trying to make a cold contact, but in all fairness. Animals on the hunt have to take their chances. What is so wrong with respectfully approaching a woman and asking her out. unimpressive resume aside.
End result was one beer. A computer and no date, or failed try.
Fuck.!

A hobbyist approaching a civvie? Man, you were playing with fire. What got into you? LOL.

 

[Robert Mugabe]

A hobbyist approaching a civvie? Man, you were playing with fire. What got into you? LOL.

Yea, well, in another thread about losing interest in the hobby, I have to admit my libido took a hit in the last couple of years. And although I have no regrets and total gratitude to the women I have met, and will in reality still continue to meet, I have this childish longing for an actual relationship. The blue balls to the wall ache that was my life, most of my life has been kind of taken care of by old man time. But seeing this woman today made me feel fascination and curiosity about her. Who she is. What she does. That being said, probably way out of my reality. I remember a thread years ago on here where somebody summed it up quite nicely. He asked "what do you have to bring to the table? Good looks? Great personality? Physical prowess? Great career? Financial wealth? Good education? Interesting friends. Interesting life?"
Fuck!
Time for a beer and another think.

 

[Spunky1]

What beer did you get?

 

[Sonic Temple]

...one chip...one seat mate. You have nothing to lose. Take it shot. Next time this happens make sure you go all in.

 

[Oistins]

First lesson in sales. If you don’t ask for the business, you definitely won’t get it .

 

[angrymime666]

Yea, well, in another thread about losing interest in the hobby, I have to admit my libido took a hit in the last couple of years. And although I have no regrets and total gratitude to the women I have met, and will in reality still continue to meet, I have this childish longing for an actual relationship. The blue balls to the wall ache that was my life, most of my life has been kind of taken care of by old man time. But seeing this woman today made me feel fascination and curiosity about her. Who she is. What she does. That being said, probably way out of my reality. I remember a thread years ago on here where somebody summed it up quite nicely. He asked "what do you have to bring to the table? Good looks? Great personality? Physical prowess? Great career? Financial wealth? Good education? Interesting friends. Interesting life?"
Fuck!
Time for a beer and another think.

It's not childish and I think it's a natural desire but we over romanticize the what it could be like with her. Then reality of what she is really like after knowing her destroys that dream and initial attraction and post nut clarity kicks in. I give you credit for shooting your shot. Hell the fact that you had interest in her is an exciting thing. For me that doesn't happen often since they are either attractive and not that interesting or interesting and not that attractive.

Moral of the story who gives a shit about being shot down, shoot your shot whenever you get that interest in someone because how often does that happen?

It has become less often as I have grown older

 

[Robert Mugabe]

It's not childish and I think it's a natural desire but we over romanticize the what it could be like with her. Then reality of what she is really like after knowing her destroys that dream and initial attraction and post nut clarity kicks in. I give you credit for shooting your shot. Hell the fact that you had interest in her is an exciting thing. For me that doesn't happen often since they are either attractive and not that interesting or interesting and not that attractive.

Moral of the story who gives a shit about being shot down, shoot your shot whenever you get that interest in someone because how often does that happen?

It has become less often as I have grown older

Usually that's the case. However she got my interest spiked. And I thought "are you still alive or just dead?" It's real life. Something I do very little of. Something inside of me just yearned to fucking live for a change. Coward that I am.

 

[xmontrealer]

At my old age, and after two failed marriages (only one of which was my fault lol), I have zero interest in civilian relationships.

Too complicated, too expensive for the value received, and I don't have to say "I'm sorry, it's not you, it's me" when the inevitable break-up comes.

Also there is nobody who would date me who is anywhere close to as young and physically attractive as the girls I meet in the sex industry.

I now see sex workers without guilt, which would not be the case if I was in a civilian sexual relationship.

I do know some guys who absolutely have to have a civilian woman as a girlfriend in their lives. I'm not similarly afflicted.

 

[Robert Mugabe]

At my old age, and after two failed marriages (only one of which was my fault lol), I have zero interest in civilian relationships.

Too complicated, too expensive for the value received, and I don't have to say "I'm sorry, it's not you, it's me" when the inevitable break-up comes.

Also there is nobody who would date me who is anywhere close to as young and physically attractive as the girls I meet in the sex industry.

I now see sex workers without guilt, which would not be the case if I was in a civilian sexual relationship.

I do know some guys who absolutely have to have a civilian woman as a girlfriend in their lives. I'm not similarly afflicted.

I have been similarly resigned for years. Just today, I had a moment where I railed against conformity or something. I guess it was the fomo which has long since ceased being relevant. Like that old Jimi Hendrix song. " I won't do you no harm. I just want to talk to you" .

 

[NotADcotor]

You miss 100% of the shots you don't take!

And the shots that miss can lead to a turnover. Sometimes it is better to pass.

 

[jalimon]

So it wasn’t really a brush.. more like a comb

 

[NotADcotor]

...one chip...one seat mate. You have nothing to lose. Take it shot. Next time this happens make sure you go all in.

End of a Comp Sci course, last day in lab. I am an outgoing Shoggoth and was helping this attractive girl throughout. She was going on and on about how she was going to miss be. Blah Blah. I told her we could still hang out and she laughed in my face. I moved away to another spot. It's so messed up, I have to wonder, did I imagine that or something.

I've been accused at the gym by two different girls of doing something I know not to do and something I wouldn't have the nerve to do and something I know I didn't do. I am assuming it was another fat bald guy acting the creep and the girl at the desk somehow assumed it was me.

Knew a guy trying to get out of his comfort zone. Apparently people who knew him and others of his friends were saying he was seriously creeping people out, like severely so. He was a bit of an oddball but he also had this very wooden way of talking. As weirdos dudes ourselves, we hardly noticed it and don't care, D&D nerds tend to be chill, but when brought up that he was creeping people out it was like, oh yeah, I see it.
Think
Kinda like this

20 seconds in. Actually looks a bit like this. Similar manners, weird verbose word choice.

without the age restriction.

 

[PeterStar]

Try again.

 

[princekwekua]

Last time I tried was several years ago. Stepped right up to one and asked her out. Her response was "well good for you for putting yourself out there, but I think I will pass".
So years later, today, I was going to the mall close by work and saw the most gorgeous Canadian Chinese woman about 35 years old in yoga pants and a skinny top muscle shirt, carrying her yoga mat in a sleeve coming from the yoga place in the mall, obviously. I averted my gaze away from her camel toe and side tracked away from where I was going. Beer store to get one can, and followed her into the grocery store. She caught me checking her out and glanced back at me. I played it fairly cool. She was talking to somebody on her phone as she was in the meat section and I was just kind of stalking her in a polite manner. We kept crossing paths in the store and found ourselves side by side at the self check out. Two of the machines were down and she approached me in a friendly way, saying the machines were broken. In my most polite and non threatening manner, I agreed and left it at that. We were both checking out our stuff at close registers and I let her go. She was exactly what I was looking for.
Now I get flooded with negative self talk. Undeserving loser. Too old. Boyish man. and on and on. These days you think you are being offensive by trying to make a cold contact, but in all fairness. Animals on the hunt have to take their chances. What is so wrong with respectfully approaching a woman and asking her out. unimpressive resume aside.
End result was one beer. A computer and no date, or failed try.
Fuck.!

You could have been accused of unwanted sexual advance, which constitues sexual harassment. You are lucky you didnt follow through.

 

[Patron]

I don’t think outside of movies and in the minds of some old guys who frequent boards like this whose favorite song should be “Glory Days”, that casual one-time pickups were ever really possible.

Hell, in the old days of singles ads, you would occasionally see someone say if you were the lady I chatted with about fish last Thursday at the grocery store, please write back.

If she was genuinely interested perhaps the best approach is to go back to that same store at the same time on that same day of the week to see if she is doing the same thing. Chicks like romantic “fate” and shit like that. We can fuck someone based on seeing one photo. That is how it often how it works with escorts.

I wish women would be more aggressive like one lady on the internet (I know it could be fake) who told how she met her husband. She was behind him in line at the grocery store and they were chatting and she saw his name on a credit card or license or something due to an issue with the cash register. She looked him up on Facebook, but instead of sending him a private message (like most of us would have done and been put on Block and Report), she looked at his friends, which included his mom who loved a certain Book Club. She joined that Book Club and became friends with the mom and got her to talk about her son. She asked the mom if her son might be interested in meeting her. It was set up, and ended happily ever after. Although if the guy ever wants to see an escort now, he better scrub that computer and text history given her abilities.

 

[Jenesis]

How do you stalk someone in a polite manner???? Just curious.

 

[Robert Mugabe]

How do you stalk someone in a polite manner???? Just curious.

Just kind of tag along in the general area they are in the store with the hope of bumping into them. Maybe at the cash register. A momentary, one time strategy to try to create a chance to meet them. If it doesn't work out, you let them go on their way. Kind of like what happened.

 

[Jenesis]

Just kind of tag along in the general area they are in the store with the hope of bumping into them. Maybe at the cash register. A momentary, one time strategy to try to create a chance to meet them. If it doesn't work out, you let them go on their way. Kind of like what happened.

I would choose a different word then. LOL.