Limits of Dirty Talk? Did I over react?

[shoefreak]

So yesterday I saw an SP from a reputable agency and was really thrown aback when I thought she suggested Bareback.

After discussing it with the booking agent, she hoped we could chalk it up to a misunderstanding, but I'm wondering if I'm out of line with my take on things...



The session with this SP started really great and overall she was great. As things got hot and heavy she got really into it, or at least acted like it (can't tell for sure, right?).

So during the session I told her to talk dirty and that's how things progressed. Now, when it came to put on the cover she opened one and threw it me and said she didn't know how to put one on (an act maybe?)

So after things progress, she seemed like she was really into it and mid way through she asks, "are you clean?" and I respond "yea.. (then I thought wait).. why?". I couldn't make out what she said next, but I heard the words "bareback" sort of muffled. I kept asking "what? what?" and she said "nevermind" and then a couple minutes later she said "I said I would never do it, but you're one of the few people I would do without a cover" in a way that sounded a bit like an excuse.

My little head was taking over and I tried to finish ASAP, but in my mind I felt she suggested us to go bare and I was really really concerned.

after i finished, I left and voiced my concerns with the agent, she talked to her and she said SP said that I brought up not using a condom (really?!, this really annoyed me because it was the SP that asked if I was clean), and that she was just going through with the dirty talk. I understand that there are conflicting stories here, and that an agent can't rely on he said/she said, but the lack of resolution still bothered me. In this profession, I don't think bare should ever be talked about outside of a "no bare allowed" context.

out of respect for the agency/sp, I've left them unnamed, but I'm looking for some feedback. Is this really reasonable to be chalked up to a misunderstanding, or should I still be super concerned and be warning fellow TERB members?

 

[bazokajoe]

Being concerned is a good thing.There is the good chance you heard correctly and she backtracked when you said "what...what"?If she has done this before and the guy went through with it then your the next guy going down on her....YIKES!

 

[shoefreak]

Being concerned is a good thing.There is the good chance you heard correctly and she backtracked when you said "what...what"?If she has done this before and the guy went through with it then your the next guy going down on her....YIKES!

Well, I'm sure she said the words bareback. an issue complicating things is I didn't hear correctly the first time and there was no explicit request to go bare. But really, suggestive questions or any suggestions is easily how these encounters start - not an explicit ask. The agent cited "no explicit ask" as one (of a couple) reasons why she can't really decide in either way. Almost all of the reasons were fair, but this made no sense to me. Any person with some logic wouldn't outright ask

If she didnt, she has to defend herself to her employer who may now look differently at her. Just my opinion

That's fair. I was certain in my mind she did suggest it though. The way she phrased it leaves room for doubt though and I'm trying to make it clear that others might have thought differently

 

[acutus]

So yesterday I saw an SP from a reputable agency and was really thrown aback when I thought she suggested Bareback.

After discussing it with the booking agent, she hoped we could chalk it up to a misunderstanding, but I'm wondering if I'm out of line with my take on things...



The session with this SP started really great and overall she was great. As things got hot and heavy she got really into it, or at least acted like it (can't tell for sure, right?).

So during the session I told her to talk dirty and that's how things progressed. Now, when it came to put on the cover she opened one and threw it me and said she didn't know how to put one on (an act maybe?)

So after things progress, she seemed like she was really into it and mid way through she asks, "are you clean?" and I respond "yea.. (then I thought wait).. why?". I couldn't make out what she said next, but I heard the words "bareback" sort of muffled. I kept asking "what? what?" and she said "nevermind" and then a couple minutes later she said "I said I would never do it, but you're one of the few people I would do without a cover" in a way that sounded a bit like an excuse.

My little head was taking over and I tried to finish ASAP, but in my mind I felt she suggested us to go bare and I was really really concerned.

after i finished, I left and voiced my concerns with the agent, she talked to her and she said SP said that I brought up not using a condom (really?!, this really annoyed me because it was the SP that asked if I was clean), and that she was just going through with the dirty talk. I understand that there are conflicting stories here, and that an agent can't rely on he said/she said, but the lack of resolution still bothered me. In this profession, I don't think bare should ever be talked about outside of a "no bare allowed" context.

out of respect for the agency/sp, I've left them unnamed, but I'm looking for some feedback. Is this really reasonable to be chalked up to a misunderstanding, or should I still be super concerned and be warning fellow TERB members?

I don't see the issue here.... In my view, this is a business transaction; so no matter what the SP said or inferred, you can make up your own mind whether or not to take her up on her offer or politely decline. I'm not clear on what your concern is...? Sincerely, Jon .

 

[HotelCali]

I think the OP did the right thing and it bodes well on his character that he voiced his concern. This girl needs to learn that bareback full service is a dangerous thing and is an enormous risk both for herself and her clients. I think when you're talking about something so alarming then it's in everyone's best interest to intervene. Some of the girls in this industry are young and don't have an established notion of possible consequences of their actions. It depends on if it was an earnest request for bareback or if fucked up things were just spilling out in the heat of sex. I've said some pretty weird shit in the act but it's understood that it's just to get us both pumped up.

 

[Toronto`s Finest]

Mybe BUT really hard for agency to tell what exactly girl is doing with clients.

 

[bobistheowl]

I'll bet somebody's PM box is full right now.

 

[explorerzip]

Something's definitely missing here especially the SP claiming that she didn't know how to put the cover on; it's not that difficult to figure out. It be a bit of a pain in the ass especially in the dark (more like absolute total darkness) and if you roll it down the wrong way, but not difficult. Throwing it back at you is strange too unless there's some strange fetish I'm not aware of.

If what she said is true, it tells me that there are stupid guys out there making the request. The only way to protect yourself is to put a cover on regardless of what she says or does.

If she was trying to push you inside her while uncovered, that's a whole different ball game.

 

[TeasePlease]

If she wanted uncovered, I doubt she would have asked.

Beware

 

[explorerzip]

exactly. You will never know the entire sexual history of your partner, SP or client, the only thing you can do is make very sure you're protected.

At least you should be able to have a conversation with your SO about his or her sexual history. Difficult conversation, but still possible.

 

[explorerzip]

If she wanted uncovered, I doubt she would have asked.

Beware

Could be asking the op.

 

[Thousand]

I remembered asking a girl to dirty talk. She said that she wanted me to shoot my load deep inside her. Of course, I was wearing protection, so I couldn't have done what she wanted. However, I wasn't concern because whatever she said was just dirty talk.

Did you not ask for dirty talk? Some women could get really nasty when it comes to talking. So, you might want to be prepared.

 

[great bear]

Every woman thats with me does the Bear thing.

 

[cuttysark]

Every woman thats with me does the Bear thing.

Digs a hole and falls asleep for four months? Den what happens?

 

[explorerzip]

I remembered asking a girl to dirty talk. She said that she wanted me to shoot my load deep inside her. Of course, I was wearing protection, so I couldn't have done what she wanted. However, I wasn't concern because whatever she said was just dirty talk.

Did you not ask for dirty talk? Some women could get really nasty when it comes to talking. So, you might want to be prepared.

Except I don't think a SP saying that she doesn't know how to use a condom or asking the OP to do bareback qualifies as dirty talk. That's just crazy talk.

 

[yolosohobby]

OP, how would you like this situation to be resolved?

 

[shoefreak]

I'll bet somebody's PM box is full right now.

you'd be surprised.

Except I don't think a SP saying that she doesn't know how to use a condom or asking the OP to do bareback qualifies as dirty talk. That's just crazy talk.

Exactly. This was my issue. it's complete crazy talk

OP, how would you like this situation to be resolved?

Let's be realistic here, I know there's no real resolution to this aside from always using protection on my end. the only thing I can do is to ensure I'm protected. I was more curious if I'm somehow conservative in my expectations for dirty talk (within an SP context).

 

[Cobra Enorme]

if you're using a condom, why does it matter that she fucks people without a condom. Or do you think she never does? Do you? Im sure you have people you go bareback with. Your gf, your wife, her bf, her husband...

 

[Naughty Nuru]

The sp is a danger to herself and others, hopefully being called out on it will help her to think about what she's doing.