WOW, I just learned the 'multiquote' function. *brain explosion emoji*
Serious question which will require some honesty. When you are browsing through websites, Twitter, or Terb are there certain women you pass by because you feel intimidated /nervous for some reason? If so, what’s the reason? I’m curious. xxoo
Congrats Brandy - this is such an insightful thread!!
absolutely.....
there has been 1 lady I've been dying to see for atleast 5 years
She's gorgeous
Her pics are spectacular
and she has this air of confidence which I love...
but I am soooo.... outta her league I cant pull the trigger on requesting some time with her
I feel like when I knocked on her door and it opened she'd come up with some excuse to cancel and close the door in my face.
I know she's classy enough to go thru with the appointment but I would probably feel like she'd be thinking ....just hurry up and pop
Perhaps focus on qualifying the sp and whether she suits your tastes rather than worrying about whether she will be impressed by you.. sometimes if you're so caught up worrying about the impression you're making, you'll miss out on her growing interest in you. Have in your mind 'gee, I hope I won't shut the door on HER face because she will be such a disappointment' attitude!
I recently met a man who was such a brilliant person but just kept talking about how no woman as hot as me would ever look twice at him for like 50% of the whole session.. (on our FIRST meeting.. he didn't even know me!) and though I was trying to be compassionate and fill up his ego, he was oblivious to any genuine interest I had and it detracted from the session for me because this was someone who just didn't respect himself. I just couldn't find a way to connect to him and I was more worried about his self-depricating feelings rather than if I was having a good time with him or not. He had already predetermined the outcome of the session without giving it a chance. You must learn to love yourself! Maybe you can be open to the idea that you are genuinely a sexy and attractive human being with many things to offer a good woman? Find someone who makes you feel like a million bucks to speed things along.
Serious question here: why is this so important to you (or anyone else) in a pay for play scenario? I'm not saying you should disregard the lady entirely, but also don't think this should be at the center of your universe either. Wife or SO? Absolutely. The side chick, SB, or random escort? Not so much.
The importance of a singular session to be successful is probably correlated to the level of someone's insecurities. The more insecure I am about something, the more important it is to me that it be a success.
I see it as a game of sorts. If I were to compare to getting service at a restaurant or a bank or retail store.. how receptive a customer service person is to me is often a result of how presentable I appear to the establishment combined with my demeanor and my level of confidence in myself and sometimes as a secondary factor, the level of kindness I show towards them. In my younger years, I would often observe service people treating older people, caucasian people, people with more expensive purses, men, taller people, etc. differently than myself.. and it made me somewhat insecure to be short, appear younger than I am, female, asian, or poor. I would wonder why people think it's okay to bud me in line, to crowd my personal space on the subway, to make me wait longer for my reservation compared to another customer who showed up later than me.
Until I learned how to play the same game. Being eloquent, firm, being able to articulate your needs and placing value on yourself first and foremost is a big lesson we should all teach ourselves. I still look young, am short, am female, ethnic.. so the way I carry myself and present myself are really important and directly correlated with the level of service I get, basically everywhere. The customer service people perk up when I walk in lol. But it does matter to me if they are happy to serve me or not - it shouldn't, but everyone wants validation and I'm not immune.. I think what is really an ego-boost is how easily and quickly one can attain such validation from regular interactions.. and if it's not so easy to get that in regular life, that would translate when hiring an escort as well. In the service industry (whether you are a server, customer service rep or an escort), we are dealing with people's egos most of the time and it has less to do with the actual food served or the sexual act delivered. Maybe many clients have wives or SO's to validate them consistently, but people without that will seek it elsewhere.
The good news is that self-confidence can be learned and cultivated.. and practice makes perfect!
The bigger laugh is those high flying, hugely educated SP's that are suddenly hit with a 'significant, unexpected life event' and somehow haven't got a pot to piss in, financially speaking, as a safety net. Then it's off to GoFundMe and Twitter to solicit money from everyone else to keep them from living on the street.
Then the rest of the highly paid SP community chimes in with how important it is to donate to the cause, yet when you look at the money actually collected, it never amounts to shit. Where is all that disposable income that the insta and twitter stars are showing off through travel pics, dinner pics, spa day pics, car pics, shopping pics, concert/show pics, etc.? Somehow, these same SP's just can't seem to part with any of their own money.
I've seen at least 10 of these situations occur in the last year alone, always the same story. It even trickles down to their pets. One well known and supposedly very busy provider charging north of $300/hr was even out there looking for funds to get her dog a 'much needed operation'. Another supposedly broke and destitute provider was begging for rent money one week to stave off eviction, and two weeks later was posting pics on twitter of her extended trip to the UK!
This is why I would never be intimidated by the illusion of an SP. None of the supposed success is real, and most never even come close to the achieving the success of the guys that hire them for sex.
Lifestyle inflation. Very common amongst sps, and drug dealers, or any quick cash industry actually. Combine that with poor business skills/money management.. which I guess is most people in general who live paycheck to paycheck. This is why I dont keep sp friends anymore nor do I use Twitter.. the ones with good head on their shoulders are busy being awesome on their own O.O To be fair, this is why I don't hang around a lot of people in general anymore lol.
I think it's important to have integrity in any work you do. I think as sps, we see others posting about their lavish lifestyles and buy into it ourselves too - furthering the fantasy of get rich quick or the 'ideal client' types. I cringe when I hear a fellow sp talk about how they are planning to scam a client or get the most out of a session.. there will always be people with bad intentions out there. The irony is that the person with this mindset will never get far in life. I remember one time in a duo, the other sp rolled their eyes at me while she was turned away from the client and while riding him reverse cowgirl - I couldn't believe it!! It completely turned me off the session with her (and I like women) and I never did business with her again.