I'm a nice guy!!!

[SamSmith]

Pretty simple eh?

Your post simply repeated what I said only with alot more words. Yawn!


And by what you mean about "treating women like shit" I see it as not always calling them when you say you're going to, or being too busy to hang out with them because you're a busy man. When a women asks "What are you up to?" or "Where are you going?" Give her a vague answer. (Ie: "I made some previous plans with the boys. I'll call you later.") That way she'll have a reason to think about you when you're not around.

Nice guys always make the mistake of leaving the lady with no reason to wonder about them whenh they're not around. Which gives another guy a chance to swoop in ahead of him. Back in the day I was nice and shy with chicks and got burned, but now I tell them straight up in a vague way what I want. For example..

There was this younger hot looking thing I met at work some time ago.. I talked to her the usual getting to know her bullshit and after a few days I just said to her.. "Look at me. You know why I talk to you right? Don't you? While looking deep into her eyes and giving her the "I just want to fuck your brains out look". It was basically an indirect way of telling her "Look I talk to you because I want to fuck you... You understand?"

Guess what she did?..

She looked shyly down at herself for a sec and then looked at me and said

"Yes".

My reply to that:. "You know I WANT you right?!" Again from her.. "Yes." Deal sealed! None of that old nice guy bullshit of "Can we go out sometime?" Or "Would you like to hang out?"


No!

Say instead: "You're coming with me because I want you to. Get ready!" or You're coming with me to (insert name of club here) or (insert name of activity or other club here) take your pick!" (The 2nd statement gives her a choice so she can't just say no.)

I'm just evil like that. edit.. Women MADE me evil like that.

 

[SamSmith]

The author also goes to great pains to use the term "mystery."

While an element of mystery may appeal to 20-something girls, it's not even remotely appealing to more mature women. Mature women - and they can be of any age, chronology doesn't always enter into it - see it for what it is: a game. If you're lucky, they'll call you on it without hesitation. If not, they'll discard you from their short list and move on to someone else.

I seen too many mature women that "like those games" and the "mystery" by the way. And they usually move on quickly to play the same BS games with someone else because they don't have fucking time to waste.


So you and the SP that posted "bingo" are wrong IMHO.

 

[bing]

In doing some research about the 'Bad Boy' concept that has been constantly brought up, I found what might be some useful information.

http://moneypowerandseduction.com/seduction/seductive-traits-of-the-bad-boy/

Here are some of the seductive qualities of a Bad Boy:

Confidence
Bad Boys always assume women want them – they have no idea what the word insecure means. Your attitude should be that you’re the one in demand, not women you are talking to.

Hidden Emotions
Remain a mystery and don’t let women know what you’re thinking. Keep them guessing. She won’t be able to figure you out, which makes you more appealing.

Furthermore, make sure everything you say has a purpose. Don’t volunteer information. Simply answer a question if asked.

Low tolerance
Do not tolerate any BS from a female. When she tries to test you, tell her to act her age. Do not be afraid to say no, stand your ground, or walk away from a situation.

Independence
Never change who you are to impress a woman or in the hope that you’ll get her into bed with you. Occupy your time with your own life and your own interests. Make plenty of time for your buddies as well. Your mind-set should be: “I am who I am — if you like me, fine; if you don’t, so what?”

Aura
Bad Boys are all about seductive confidence and women appreciate confident lovers. So don’t be afraid to let your natural masculine sexuality shine. This doesn’t mean you ogle at females all day, but you should be comfortable in letting a woman know you’re attracted to her without being a jerk. And when it comes time, make sure you know what you’re doing in the bedroom.

Scarcity/Mystery
For women, guys who are too available are not attractive. Bad Boys are coldly independent — they aren’t desperately hovering around women, hoping to get some attention.

People want what they can’t have, and women are no different. So make yourself busy and scarce. Be an unpredictable, mystery man. Be a challenge — let her do some of the chasing.

Being too nice will ultimately hurt you in the end. Putting women on pedestals, agreeing with every word they utter, and paying for female company are things Bad Boys don’t do — because women see this as “weak”.

Be decisive in your words and actions; never second-guess yourself. voice your opinion and don’t worry about offending others.

Pretty simple eh? Funny how it does not mention treating women like shit. To sum it up in one word I would say confidence. Be confident in who you are, and again don't be a doormat. I guess after reading that I am a 'bad boy', just a nice one.

Great post again A1. I did some research many years ago and came up with the same qualities that women look for in a man. Once you have those qualities women start chasing you, which for a lot of guys here would find hard to believe. It's not the "bad" women like, but the confidence, which many confuse.


Another point which should be added is, it's more important how interested a women is in a man than how the man feels about the women. The "nice guys" get their label when they start chasing women who are not really interested in them and they try to win their approval by doing them favours and being overly nice. In the end they become doormats and the women loose all respect for them. If a women likes you, she will be doing you the favours!

It is very simple, but most guys just don't get it.

 

[elassowipo1]

People are making this way too complicated.

Bottom line:

- Be yourself and nothing but yourself. Do what YOU feel is right. Doesn't matter if people think you're "nice" or "bad" or whatever.
- If people don't like you for who you really are then that's their problem, fuck em!
- There is no need at all to "act" a certain way when dealing with a woman. You're better off with women who appreciate the real you anyways, forget the rest. There are plenty of fish in the sea.

 

[Rockslinger]

There is no need at all to "act" a certain way when dealing with a woman. You're better off with women who appreciate the real you anyways,

Yes, but what is the fun in that? We are human beings we have to play head games.

 

[tboy]

People are making this way too complicated.

Bottom line:

- Be yourself and nothing but yourself. Do what YOU feel is right. Doesn't matter if people think you're "nice" or "bad" or whatever.
- If people don't like you for who you really are then that's their problem, fuck em!
- There is no need at all to "act" a certain way when dealing with a woman. You're better off with women who appreciate the real you anyways, forget the rest. There are plenty of fish in the sea.

Exactly right. I hate when "playas" say someone should learn how to play the game. If you have to play a game or act a certain way, then fuck that shit. IMO if you have to act anyway but what comes naturally, then who is not being true to themselves?

Frankly I'd rather have one woman who accepts me for the person I am, NOT what I had to do to get her. If there isn't that one woman for me? Then I can live with that.

Maybe that is the reason so many couples end in divorce? Guys are "getting" women by playing them instead of simply being themselves, with all their insecurities, their faults and being true to themselves. They are not falling for him, they're falling for the idea of him.

For eg: a buddy said to me recently about my place (I live in a work shop) "what are you going to do if you ever bring a woman back here"? My answer? Nothing (maybe clean the dust off the jacuzzi lol) What if she doesn't like it? "that's her problem, not mine".

A very wise woman said to me on this very subject (about her not accepting my living situation): Go to her place. BRILLIANT!!!

 

[drrogers]

Good Thread - actually hits close to home - especially the - "you're my very best friend" means I'm either one of the girls or her gay buddy. And rest assured I am neither.

 

[a 1 player]

People are making this way too complicated.

Bottom line:

- Be yourself and nothing but yourself. Do what YOU feel is right. Doesn't matter if people think you're "nice" or "bad" or whatever.
- If people don't like you for who you really are then that's their problem, fuck em!
- There is no need at all to "act" a certain way when dealing with a woman. You're better off with women who appreciate the real you anyways, forget the rest. There are plenty of fish in the sea.

I agree completely.

 

[Corey]

People are making this way too complicated.

Bottom line:

- Be yourself and nothing but yourself. Do what YOU feel is right. Doesn't matter if people think you're "nice" or "bad" or whatever.
- If people don't like you for who you really are then that's their problem, fuck em!
- There is no need at all to "act" a certain way when dealing with a woman. You're better off with women who appreciate the real you anyways, forget the rest. There are plenty of fish in the sea.

This is a great philosophy when it comes to family members, guy friends and women you are not attracted to.

 

[JEFF247]

Looks like I may be on the right track. I will update my progress.

 

[tboy]

This is a great philosophy when it comes to family members, guy friends and women you are not attracted to.

I'd really like to see a poll of the guys who "play the game" and have a list as long as their arm of women they've bedded and to see just how many honest relationships they've actually had. I'm talking 5 or 10 yrs long not 4 weeks long.

 

[Rockslinger]

(I live in a work shop)

Hey tboy, is it true that men in toolbelts are babe magnets?

 

[Rockslinger]

I'd really like to see a poll of the guys who "play the game" and to see just how many honest relationships they've actually had. I'm talking 5 or 10 yrs long not 4 weeks long.

Bad boys are not interested in honest 5-10 year relationships. That is why they are bad boys and why women find them attractive.

 

[tboy]

Bad boys are not interested in honest 5-10 year relationships. That is why they are bad boys and why women find them attractive.

Which is why women are constantly bitching that men don't want commitments.....

As for the tool belt post: Funny you say that. I was onsite yesterday and was riding in an elevator with 8 other workers. An older couple got on and the woman said "my look at all the men, I have a friend who asked where to go to meet men, I guess I should send her HERE" lol.....

 

[genintoronto]

Again, I'm calling horse crap on the Nice Guy™ Myth and its corollary mysogynist assumptions

A real nice guy is a guy who is respectful and a decent human being, not because he's trying to get laid, but because it's the right thing to do. A real nice guy doesn't bitch and whine about not getting the pussy he feels entitled to after doing some woman a favor. Because he didn't do it to get pussy, but because he is genuily nice and caring.

The Nice Guys™ who claim that they never get laid because women want assholes seem to forget that being 'nice' doesn't make up for lack of other things, such as being interesting, charming, funny, relatively attractive, witty, smart, confident, etc. They also seem to expect that women owe them pussy for being 'nice'. As such, they tend to be more manipulative than 'nice': doing favors and always being there when needed, hoping that at some point, the women they desire will see the light and fall on their laps because of all the 'nice' things they've done for them. Instead of say, being upfront about their interest and asking them out. So when the women in question don't reciprocate by giving them the attention and affection they expect in exchange of being 'nice', the Nice Guys™ find it easier to blame women -- "they all want assholes" -- rather than their own failures.

Being too 'nice' to be loved/get laid is a lame excuse: I don't know anyone (men or women) who doesn't appreciate nice and caring people. But most women and men I know don't like manipulative people who lack the confidence to go for what they want and who blame others for not getting what they feel entitled to.

In summary, real nice guys don't finish last. But Nice Guys™ who are boring and fawn excessively, and believe this entitles them to get laid, finish last.

 

[a 1 player]

Again, I'm calling horse crap on the Nice Guy™ Myth and its corollary mysogynist assumptions

A real nice guy is a guy who is respectful and a decent human being, not because he's trying to get laid, but because it's the right thing to do. A real nice guy doesn't bitch and whine about not getting the pussy he feels entitled to after doing some woman a favor. Because he didn't do it to get pussy, but because he is genuily nice and caring.

The Nice Guys™ who claim that they never get laid because women want assholes seem to forget that being 'nice' doesn't make up for lack of other things, such as being interesting, charming, funny, relatively attractive, witty, smart, confident, etc. They also seem to expect that women owe them pussy for being 'nice'. As such, they tend to be more manipulative than 'nice': doing favors and always being there when needed, hoping that at some point, the women they desire will see the light and fall on their laps because of all the 'nice' things they've done for them. Instead of say, being upfront about their interest and asking them out. So when the women in question don't reciprocate by giving them the attention and affection they expect in exchange of being 'nice', the Nice Guys™ find it easier to blame women -- "they all want assholes" -- rather than their own failures.

Being too 'nice' to be loved/get laid is a lame excuse: I don't know anyone (men or women) who doesn't appreciate nice and caring people. But most women and men I know don't like manipulative people who lack the confidence to go for what they want and who blame others for not getting what they feel entitled to.

In summary, real nice guys don't finish last. But Nice Guys™ who are boring and fawn excessively, and believe this entitles them to get laid, finish last.

You said it far better than I ever could. Well done!

**a 1 applaudes**

 

[tboy]

Actually genie, you make some good points BUT for one:

A nice guy will do things above and beyond the call of duty as it were not to get pussy as you say it, but to get much much more. Like love perhaps? Funny thing is, that nice guys tend to do things for people in general, and then do x times as much for someone they are interested in or truly care about and hope for something more. They do it because they care, NOT to get pussy as you so aptyly put it.

To boil it down: They do it because of THEIR feelings, not because of what they want to get out of her.

For eg: I have a customer of mine. She's everything I ever dreamed of having in a woman. Looks, brains, talent, personality, demeanor, and I can tell she's a great person because when I go over to do things for her, she always has a supply of coke for me, makes me lunch or buys it for me if she's out. I'd basically give my right (and left) testicles for a chance with this woman but I know it will never happen. Even still, I go out of my way to do things for her. For eg: recently I completed a project for her and it screamed for one more small shelving base cabinet yet she really couldn't afford it. But I made it for her anyways and told her when I delivered it: Pay me if you want, and if you do decide to, pay me what you think it's worth. But I am NOT expecting payment for this. Did I do it hoping she'd fuck me? It did NOT even enter into my mind. I did it because I care about her and she's a great person. EOS.

Furthermore, if anything WERE to happen physically, I would NOT want it because I did something nice for her. I would want her to do it because she cared about me too. I'd rather pay some hot SP than have someone fuck me because of what I did.

Capice?

 

[genintoronto]

Tboy: you're basically repeating what I just said. You are being nice and doing favors for this woman not being you expect or want to get laid in exchange, but because you really care about her and like to do things for her to make her life easier. That qualifies you as a nice guy, not a Nice Guy™.

Also, of course people will be more incline to do favors and be there for people they like/love/desire. We all do it. But the real nice ones among us don't bitch and whine when those nice things alone don't get us laid, and we don't feel entitled to people's affection and attention because we're being nice.

But nice guy/person or not, any relationship (romantic or otherwise) where one person is far more adoring and caring than the other -- ie, there's a significant imbalance in the give and take -- is bound to be problematic and not have a fairy tale ending. From the person who is taking, it doesn't necessarily occur to them that they 'owe' you something, and they don't necessarily see all the work involved in the giving that you do. But more importantly, you can't blame others or be bitter when you're asking to be trodden over. Any decent relationship (friendship, romantic, or others) demand that you know how to take as intelligently as you give.

 

[tboy]

LOL I mised the TM part, that's fricken funny!

 

[JEFF247]

One of the reasons bad boys get laid more is because most will hump anything with a pulse. I do consider myself a nice guy and turned down a piece of ass from a very attractive female because I had no feelings for the girl. She did for me but I didn't want to string her along. I was critisized by friends (mostly married) for not taking advantage of the fair maiden. I just didn't think it was right.