hired an escort, now i need help!!
- Thread starter turtlelover
- Start date
Oh boy.... Your optimism and confidence are worthy of envy.
Maybe you will hit it off with her in such a way that she develops feelings for you. Just remember that countless others have tried and failed before you. Just remember that at least several were strung along for months, burning their cash, for a fantasy they could see just beyond their fingertips, but that never existed in the first place. Can you tell the difference between the real thing and a ploy? What happens if she doesn't genuinely return your feelings except in the business environment? Will you continue to throw cash at her so long as you can get your fix?
Just remember this business is a drug. It's highly likely you'll get addicted, and much of the fallout is similar to other drug habits. And just as expensive (if not more so).
It sounds like you're going to do it anyway and I wish you all the luck in the world.
I use to love going out with the boys to bars and clubs all the time... didnt even care about hitting on girls. Some girls would think I'm hitting on them but I was just talking like I would to anyone. When I'm during the summer and winter break I hit up the madison bar, swan and firkin, clubs like guvernment all the time and I can't stand talking to most of the girls there. I just talk to girl friends that come with us because I find the ones that get drunk and high as fuck are the stupidest fucking people ever. Plus my game is horrible so when I do talk to girls I feel like I'm always fucking up lol.
Plus theres nothing worse than a girl asking you to buy her a drink, I just bring them water when they ask that shit. If I want to buy you a drink I'll buy you one. Just seems that this escort I was with was more intelligent and mature than all the rest. Plus shes the first one I had sex with sober, every other girl I've been with I was drunk.
Well your horrible game won't be an issue here; you pay her and she falls in love with you lol. Sounds like you're just tired of "the game" in general and want to dispense with the bullshit. In other words, you're too old for your age, if you know what I mean. I still don't think you asking this paragon of an escort out on a date is a good idea. It's a trap that's just begging you to fall into it. And anything you currently feel towards her will be biased, because her main goal during your time together was to give you a good time and earn repeat business.
I was lucky enough to learn a few hard lessons about this industry from a different angle, without actually being party to it. I dated a stripper during my university days, one who I didn't meet at the club. It didn't turn out well anyway. But I saw a lot of behind-the-scenes stuff and I've heard a lot of horror stories about guys chasing girls that are leading them around in circles.
I guess you have to ask yourself, is the reward worth the uber-high risk?
I
Intrigued
A guy can get better with women if he approaches them a lot. You have such a sick and jaded sense of the world... Your way of thinking is to negative for me . welcome to ignore list.
With all due respect mrsCALoki or the Mr CALoki, I usually don't get involved in any of this, but I had to butt in here...
Why does it always has to be around the 100hrs ?? Don't you think escorts are human beings too, assuming as you said you were one...
Whatever you are trying to say is, you fell the rich lonely guy who happened to be Mr LOKI???? You make it seems like escort/SP doesn't have a heart but can only fall after the 100hrs or $25K, assuming its $250 hr... I honestly genuinely don't get what you write, NOTHING MAKES SENSE!.. You think you know everything.. I know now you will lecture me how I don't know anything about life, blah blah blah blah! You are NOT MRS KNOW EVERYTHING.
FYI, I'm done with this thread and if you wish to reply to me, please don't as I'm not interested in any sort derogatory comments. And I'm sure I just made myself a place in the long ignore list!
We?
WE?!
WE?!?!?!
As a rocket scientist, I resent the use of this phrase by someone who obviously has no idea what they're talking about! Our internet connection is slow but me and most of the other astronauts up here on the ISS are laughing our asses off at these delusional and contradictory stories.
The worst aspect of this poster is that every thread "she" posts in ends up deliberately derailed into being about "her", instead of the original topic of discussion.
You don't need to use an envelope, that isn't fooling anyone and is a sure sign of a noob.
And turtlelover, you really should get over the artificial 'feelings' and find a girlfriend. Almost every time I leave an escort after an hour I think I'm love and have found THE ONE and don't have to see any other SPs, but all I need to do is keep going back to see this one again and again.
But after a few more visits I remember that yes, I am "john #3 for the day" and as wonderful as she can make me feel, the relationship we have will never be more than pay-for-play.
TL time for some positive reinforcment. You have done right to at least ask yourself this question. And also you have done a good thing asking this question on this board. This shows a level of maturity that many at your stage in adulthood may not share. Even people later in their lives often fail to question themselves and their actions.
Whatever you do and however it resolves itself you will be OK as long as you keep an open, inquiring and accepting mind. Good luck, I know you must feel great about meeting an intelligent and beautiful woman who recognized some of the positive things you bring to the world.
The good news is this type of girl exists for you. It may be this one, it may be another later in life. Keep your positive self aware spirit alive and enjoy your journey.
Don't worry about "having game" the girl you want doesn't want to see "your game", she wants to see the happy and successful you. Increase your self confidence where you can, feel good about yourself and if a girl is making you feel bad about yourself understand that says more about her than you.
There are lots of great positive ladies throughout all aspects of society and some do want to meet you.
Whatever you do and however it resolves itself you will be OK as long as you keep an open, inquiring and accepting mind. Good luck, I know you must feel great about meeting an intelligent and beautiful woman who recognized some of the positive things you bring to the world.
The good news is this type of girl exists for you. It may be this one, it may be another later in life. Keep your positive self aware spirit alive and enjoy your journey.
Don't worry about "having game" the girl you want doesn't want to see "your game", she wants to see the happy and successful you. Increase your self confidence where you can, feel good about yourself and if a girl is making you feel bad about yourself understand that says more about her than you.
There are lots of great positive ladies throughout all aspects of society and some do want to meet you.
The hundred hours is not about SPs, it is about people.
The number stuck in my head from a paper that compared divorce / break up rates against several factors.
Based on a whack of data a half dozen factors were used to determine how likely a relationship was going to last.
I had intuitively believed that people who knew each other longer (as in how many months) when they became committed / moved in together / got married be a very strong indicator of sucess. Turns out I was wrong. Hours spent one on one was by far the best indicator. 100 hours was the minimum that was needed to give a relationship even a small chance of working.
How long is 100 hours really? Well you can pretty much guess a civilian date is 4 hours. So say 10 typical dates, (40 hrs), maybe one full day with breakfast in bed (12 hrs) and one weekend away (48 hrs) is hitting the 100 hrs. Before I went the SP thing, if a guy started to talk about 'love' or tried to get too close before about that much time I would have been nervous about him. You need about 100 hrs to get to know someone. And of course those have to be in different types of activities, or you only know one aspect of them.
So how the heck can you let a client get emotionally close with out knowing him? How can you know him without spending at least as much time with them as a civilian should with a guy before getting involved.
Of course you could argue that she is only agreeing to the first date. I believe that there is a huge gap between the business deal and making it personal. So I use the paper's 100 hours as the standard time needed to know someone.
simple.Oh god another Eng Sci grad !
the option of at least pretending it is not just
Actually it is critical in the US for a legal defense. Here in Canada, I guess it depends on the girl. I used to get mine in an envelope with a thank you card. It made me feel less like a whore and more like a courtesan. I guess we need a survey to see how it makes the other women here.
Gee you are telling us that it takes you 3 hrs to decide it is not a real feeling. And you think a woman does not need to spend a lot more time with a client to discover he is special and wants to spend civilian time with him?
When I decided to get out of debt being an SP (2009/2010) and started collecting advice I was warned dozens of times that clients in general would get bored quickly. And if I blurred the line between business and friendship without being certain I knew the guy I would get hurt.
Seems you are supporting my advice
.It would be if he showed the signs of being mature. Let's keep in mind his post was a 20 year old who decided to pay for sex and fell hard after one visit. In the 21st century having sex on a campus is about as hard as finding the cafeteria. I do not know what it was like when you were there, but I do know what it was like recently. If he is not getting all the sex he wants, either he does not want it or is ...... well... or he is not mature and self aware.
I just see no reason to build up egos
.He needs to follow nate1's advise and find someone that fits with him.
I feel like one of the most self conscious people on the planet. I when I'm at home or in school I'm in sweatpants and comfortable clothes but before I go out somewhere I obsess about how I look. I workout 5 or 6 times a week to take out my sexual frustrations and to keep up the muscle tone. I also constantly post pics to get rated on bodybuilding.com. I am self aware and I think my maturity level is normal, but my self confidence is horrible and needs work.It would be if he showed the signs of being mature. Let's keep in mind his post was a 20 year old who decided to pay for sex and fell hard after one visit. In the 21st century having sex on a campus is about as hard as finding the cafeteria. I do not know what it was like when you were there, but I do know what it was like recently. If he is not getting all the sex he wants, either he does not want it or is ...... well... or he is not mature and self aware.
I just see no reason to build up egos
He needs to follow nate1's advise and find someone that fits with him.
So in other words you are a fairly typical 20 year old. Don't fool yourself in thinking everyone else has got their shit together--lot's don't.
Self confidence comes from self love. Embrace yourself, what is good about you (and that is not your body type) and spend less time comparing yourself with others. There will allways be people who are bigger and better than you.
Commit to yourself to talk to strangers--even just a hello. Start saying hi to older people or girls that you have no interest in. Less pressure. Show a genuine interest in them if they want to talk back. Move on if they don't. Get experience in social interactions, they are not as painful as they may seem.
Be a giving person and celebrate your victories. You had the nerve to visit a SP, many here lurk for years scared of their first encounter.
Build on the experience you had with the SP, it was an example of what can be. Take the attitude you took with this girl into your real life.
So this is the girl you`re talking about?
https://terb.cc/vbulletin/showthread.php?421751-How-much-do-I-tip
I`m more curious about your dad`s friend. I`m guessing it`s not one of the agencies advertising on TERB, right?
Does your dad knows about your hobbying?
https://terb.cc/vbulletin/showthread.php?421751-How-much-do-I-tip
I`m more curious about your dad`s friend. I`m guessing it`s not one of the agencies advertising on TERB, right?
Does your dad knows about your hobbying?
Everything makes a little more sense with a proper explanation.The hundred hours is not about SPs, it is about people.
The number stuck in my head from a paper that compared divorce / break up rates against several factors.
Based on a whack of data a half dozen factors were used to determine how likely a relationship was going to last.
I had intuitively believed that people who knew each other longer (as in how many months) when they became committed / moved in together / got married be a very strong indicator of sucess. Turns out I was wrong. Hours spent one on one was by far the best indicator. 100 hours was the minimum that was needed to give a relationship even a small chance of working.
How long is 100 hours really? Well you can pretty much guess a civilian date is 4 hours. So say 10 typical dates, (40 hrs), maybe one full day with breakfast in bed (12 hrs) and one weekend away (48 hrs) is hitting the 100 hrs. Before I went the SP thing, if a guy started to talk about 'love' or tried to get too close before about that much time I would have been nervous about him. You need about 100 hrs to get to know someone. And of course those have to be in different types of activities, or you only know one aspect of them.
So how the heck can you let a client get emotionally close with out knowing him? How can you know him without spending at least as much time with them as a civilian should with a guy before getting involved.
Of course you could argue that she is only agreeing to the first date. I believe that there is a huge gap between the business deal and making it personal. So I use the paper's 100 hours as the standard time needed to know someone.
:thumb: Simple!
Ok this is me trying to nice........ and I stole most of this from a dirty old man.......
In a relationship both people involved are sort of shopping for the best possible partner they can afford.
Imagine a huge beam balance. At one end you pile up all the things you think are good about you, things that add value. At the other end you pile all the things the other person has to offer.
So the beam swings a bit and either she has more to offer or you have more to offer or it is balanced. If you think you have more to offer you will eventually move on. If you think she is a LOT better than you, you will have a terrible time ever learning to relax. If you think she is about equal value or a little better it will be perfect.
She is doing the same thing.
But the complication is women and men have different point scores for different things.
So what?
Well for me, and a fair number of women a man "comfortable in his skin" is very very desirable. Some people call it self confidence, but I dislike that term because is more about how you feel about others. "I am great compared to others" but comfortable in their own skin is more about how they see themselves. I think for a lot of us that is way way more important than "bodybuilder.com".
You need to stop comparing yourself to others. It is deadly when you start to do that. I may get flack on this but for me a man who cares to much about his looks is a huge turn of.
Does that make sense?
With SPs (including me when I had an hour meter on my ass) the $ $ $ $ tilts the beam. As long as both the man and the girl keep that in the back of their head it works out well. If you forget that you are setting yourself up for pain.
So with a 'civilian' you have to do at least 1/2 the work to make it fun.
The point: be realistic and find a girl that fits. Stop thinking and worrying so much about how others see your physical self. In a few decades it will be gone anyway
So there you go, my best advice.
You said that you got a free session for doing some lawn work. So the girl that you fell in love with is your second escort?
And yeah, I read that it's your dad's friend's escort agency but they're friends so you don't think he mentioned anything to your dad?
