Poorboy, in the future keep your mouth shut and your ears open until you've figured out the dynamics of your environment. If you had done that you would likely have narrowed down Ms. Secretary as an overly sensitive malcontent and have figured out to avoid her.
Got a complaint at work
- Thread starter poorboy
- Start date
Thanks for your concern, but I'm not too concerned about losing my job as I work for the state. The manager chuckled, so I think he thinks it's pretty trivial, but I'll definately start noting these things. I talked to another co worker, and he said he's not surprised how she's behaving and to just blow it off.
What right does Poorboy have to obtain copies of other complaints? Those outside matters should be confidential HR files. Also, getting statements from management and co-workers when there's no formal investigation or legal proceeding involved might not be met with enthusiasm or full cooperation. What he can do is make personal notes of conversations he has without putting co-workers on the spot.
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I was never accused of any inappropriate behaviour with a female co-worker, but a women I worked with once complained to management that because I "slammed" down the phone in a conversation with her, I made her deaf in one ear.
Now...I will admit I did hang up on her...where I worked, I dealt with internal (other departments) and external customers of the company, and she had been nagging me about on an issue (delivery by an outside courier company) I really didn't have any control over. She had called me for the 4th time that morning, and I had enough, so I ended the conversation while she was still talking.
Well...that got her knickers in a knot, and she made her complaint to HR that I damaged her hearing. I got called into HR, and was asked for my version of the incident. They knew she was just causing trouble, but had to go through the motions. They wanted me to sign a document apologizing to her for my behaviour, and I refused until my lawyer looked at it. I called a lawyer buddy of mine, who said no way should I sign it, and to tell them I was retaining legal counsel and filling a counter-complaint of my own against this women, and the company, of harassment, and creating a toxic workplace because of this frivilous complaint.
Well...HR didn't know what hit them....I left their office, and it wasn't 15 minutes till the District Manager was at my desk, asking to speak with me in private. He let me know that nothing was going forward, as far as he was concerned, it was all going to go away and nothing would be put in my file. Further to that, he told me if she still continued to complain about hearing damage, they were going to demand evidence that she had perfect hearing before the incident, and ask for her to be tested (at her own expense) for hearing loss after.
After that, whenever I had occasion to walk by her desk, I would mouth a greeting, and grin....
Now...I will admit I did hang up on her...where I worked, I dealt with internal (other departments) and external customers of the company, and she had been nagging me about on an issue (delivery by an outside courier company) I really didn't have any control over. She had called me for the 4th time that morning, and I had enough, so I ended the conversation while she was still talking.
Well...that got her knickers in a knot, and she made her complaint to HR that I damaged her hearing. I got called into HR, and was asked for my version of the incident. They knew she was just causing trouble, but had to go through the motions. They wanted me to sign a document apologizing to her for my behaviour, and I refused until my lawyer looked at it. I called a lawyer buddy of mine, who said no way should I sign it, and to tell them I was retaining legal counsel and filling a counter-complaint of my own against this women, and the company, of harassment, and creating a toxic workplace because of this frivilous complaint.
Well...HR didn't know what hit them....I left their office, and it wasn't 15 minutes till the District Manager was at my desk, asking to speak with me in private. He let me know that nothing was going forward, as far as he was concerned, it was all going to go away and nothing would be put in my file. Further to that, he told me if she still continued to complain about hearing damage, they were going to demand evidence that she had perfect hearing before the incident, and ask for her to be tested (at her own expense) for hearing loss after.
After that, whenever I had occasion to walk by her desk, I would mouth a greeting, and grin....
Let everyone think it's all cool, but definitely keep your own records from now on. Sounds like you'll be all right.
Listen to madboy.
I'm trying to read between the lines. Sounds like you and she don't really interact professionally, and you were using this as a gambit to chat and get acquainted. She probably tried to shut you down the first time and you either missed it or ignored it. If she went to the boss before you even got to strike #3, she must really hate you and want you to stay away from her. Maybe it's personal, but maybe somebody's put the word out on you.
I do not see the downside of documenting every event that is common knowledge. I am not saying to go and get confidential files. Just know what you are up against, get disclosure on his own matter and take statements from other people this woman is accusing. I think that working for the state does not give you immunity from sexual harrasment. Like I said, you do not want to be out on you ass in the middle of a recession.
I would only document interactions privately with her for future reference. Full details of what occurred, who was present, time and date, etc. No need to drag management into it. Nobody likes someone who is high maintenance. In addition, such an extreme reaction made public for what most would consider a benign threat will discredit you.
A few years back, some girl at work liked me. She was cute but full on crazy. I didn't want to have anything to do with it. She didn't take the hint, started giving me back massages, sitting in my lap, telling co-workers were dating and she was going to have my kid, sending stalkish text messages when girls would post to me on FB.
I took my own advice. Asked her politely to knock it off. She kept it up. Whenever she did something like sitting on my lap or unwanted touching, I documented it. After a short time, I went to my manager, stated I have an issue, showed all my documentation and HR was on her like white on rice.
pretty sure she keeps complaining about you and you are doing nothing, your boss will quickly figure that out and just start ignoring her when she opens her mouth.
last place i worked had a few guys that couldn't keep their mouth shut and even had 1 cunt that kept a note pad and took heavily edited notes of everything that was said or done around him. after a 2 week period of watching him go to the bosses office every 15 mins with his notepad, we got "unofficially" informed the boss didn't care what happened to the guy or if he got hurt and couldn't come back. at the 3 month mark of daily meetings to complain about how he was being treated and going to the hr department without informing the union and complaining about all 89 guys in the transport division, the boss finally at a town hall meeting stood up in front of everyone, including the guys that took the notes and said "it has been brought to my attention daily for the last 3 months that 88 out of 89 drivers are being rude and mean to 1 person, so i ask all of you never to speak to, look at or acknowledge that 1 driver ever again". he quit shortly after that.
You mentioned "get statements from management or co-workers". That's where I got the idea about going public. Word travels fast.
The OP said that the woman made accusations.
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She complains to the boss about it, and I got sat down and was given an informal talk about the appropriateness of my conversation.
The disclosure of the accusations in writing, and statements from co-workers are for his own protections. In these matters, things that are said in the office today can be twisted and contorted into something ugly tommorow. With the disclosure of charges in writing you only need to defend what is put on paper. Personally if I was accused in an office and later found innocent, I would no longer want to work in the same office with that woman. I might want to have her fired.
Sounds like someone got into a sticky situation at the office. If I were you I would have minimal interaction with that woman from now on. She sounds like bad news.
