Dysfunctional father issues.

[mrsCALoki]

mhmmm thank you for response

a few more questions if you dont mind

may i ask how much he gave you "the safety net amount" .. and how well are you doing now... how much money did you make off from the safety amount again if you dont mind me asking..

and another question... if he passes away.. do you get all of his assets? his whole 30 million ?

how long have you been married?

Yes of course he gives me advice. He did it in what I thought was a very romantic way, but apparently men here think was silly.

you mean after fuck sessions you had with him.. and he would give you stock tips? lol.. yes i think i remember reading that somewhere when you posted it a few months ago lol

About 10% of his assets. I made enough to have to pay well in the six figures to the government of Canada last year.

Well there is an appendix on both our wills that gives keepsakes to people. But the surviving spouse and children get the assets. We do have pre-nups.

Loki decided to give me my weight in gold instead of a check. I thought it was romantic. He had the gold, Just transferred more or less my weight in gold to me. I think it was romantic and sweet and wonderful. Apparently some guys here found it unacceptable.

It is no harder to fall in love with a rich man than it is to fall in love with a pauper; and the side benefits are great.

 

[Closer68]

Voting for a person who cheats is about voting for someone I could never trust. If a person will deliberately ignore their wedding vows and risk hurting someone he claims to love and cherish, it is very likely he would do the same with any promise or commitment he makes to anyone.

A large number of people simply assume if a politician will betray their spouse they will be prone to betray the voters. Simple. Cheaters cheat.

It might not always be true, but it is a strong indicator of how much the politician cares about hurting others and how serious they are about keeping their word.

And Closer just does not see that and decides it is a plot on the part of women to exclude unfaithful men. I dislike fanatics. I dislike shallow thinking. I must admit to be fair that it is possible he just said it to poke all the women on terb 'for fun". I dislike that juvenile behaviour even more so either way, Closer to me is just not a great example of a man.

You have essentially illustrated my point for me, perfectly.

Like I said before, I have very serious concerns about American women voting on the basis of marital fidelity. "Cheaters cheat"???? Is that how we go about choosing accountants, physicians, bankers, lawyers? I believe private lives should remain private and that private behavior has no bearing on the public interest. You disagree, and I can respect that, but you'll have to come to terms with the fact that reasonable people may see this as a cause for concern. No, I do not believe it's a female plot. Were it a plot, I would actually be less concerned, because that would signal some sort of rational self-interest at play, whereas my concern is based on how irrational American women, such as yourself, tend to be on this subject.

 

[mrsCALoki]

You have essentially illustrated my point for me, perfectly.

Like I said before, I have very serious concerns about American women voting on the basis of marital fidelity. "Cheaters cheat"???? Is that how we go about choosing accountants, physicians, bankers, lawyers? I believe private lives should remain private and that private behavior has no bearing on the public interest. You disagree, and I can respect that, but you'll have to come to terms with the fact that reasonable people may see this as a cause for concern. No, I do not believe it's a female plot. Were it a plot, I would actually be less concerned, because that would signal some sort of rational self-interest at play, whereas my concern is based on how irrational American women, such as yourself, tend to be on this subject.

Well I would never knowingly choose an accountant, physician, banker or lawyer who has deceived, lied, misappropriated funds, or taken actions which could harm or hurt someone he has set up a partnership with. I do not think many women or men would. Would you? Cheating is cheating. If they are willing to do it to one person they will do it to others. Simple. Only a man could somehow separate one form of lying, cheating, and breaking ones word from another.

By the way, I am not american. Please stop making foolish and inaccurate assumptions about me. And I can assure you that if one of our prime ministers was exposed as having robbed or cheated or violated his oaths he would soon be replaced on Downing Street.

 

[mur11]

Well I would never knowingly choose an accountant, physician, banker or lawyer who has deceived, lied, misappropriated funds, or taken actions which could harm or hurt someone he has set up a partnership with. I do not think many women or men would. Would you? Cheating is cheating. If they are willing to do it to one person they will do it to others. Simple. Only a man could somehow separate one form of lying, cheating, and breaking ones word from another.

By the way, I am not american. Please stop making foolish and inaccurate assumptions about me. And I can assure you that if one of our prime ministers was exposed as having robbed or cheated or violated his oaths he would soon be replaced on Downing Street.

I really really don't want to get dragged into this asinine shit-slinging debate, but the hypocrisy of what you said begs a response
Let's assume your story as you tell it is true

So you decided to become a SP for whatever reason. If you're as smart as you say you are, you had to have known that a decent number of your clients would most likely be married or in a relationship. Therefore, by servicing their needs, you would be complicit in their cheating on their wives or partners. Not the same as cheating yourself, but pretty close. You mentioned (and I hate myself for even remembering this) that your father cheated many times on your mother. While no doubt, most of the blame falls on him (if you hold that cheating is wrong, which personally I do), as a daughter knowing this, you had to have resented the women that your father cheated on your mother with. And yet, you decided to become a SP anyway, again knowing that you had a very good chance of seeing a married man at some point. Which again, is fine to me, as a SP if you grilled every client on their martial status, you would have very few customers, but to judge others for cheating is pretty hypocritical. And I know what you're going to say, that you wouldn't have known that these guys would be married so it wouldn't be cheating on your end. But, first of all, if you hadn't found your meal ticket right away, I have a hard time believing you would turn down a regular appointment from a married client even if you found out after the fact that he was married.

Secondly, the whole 'oh I didn't know' policy is pretty weak. Now according to your tidy little narrative, you never had to deal with any of this because you married your first client. Which, fine, whatever, that's your story and you're sticking to it. The point I'm making, is that you had to be comfortable with the concept that you might see a married man (or a guy in any kind of monogamous relationship) and morally you equivocated this action with your previously-held beliefs. Which is fine,everyone's moral code is subject to change pending unusual circumstances, but now to take some morally holier-than-thou attitude is false.

Also, are you sure, beyond any reasonable doubt, that Loki never cheated on his ex-wife with anyone?

 

[mrsCALoki]

I really really don't want to get dragged into this asinine shit-slinging debate, but the hypocrisy of what you said begs a response
Let's assume your story as you tell it is true

So you decided to become a SP for whatever reason. If you're as smart as you say you are, you had to have known that a decent number of your clients would most likely be married or in a relationship. Therefore, by servicing their needs, you would be complicit in their cheating on their wives or partners. Not the same as cheating yourself, but pretty close. You mentioned (and I hate myself for even remembering this) that your father cheated many times on your mother. While no doubt, most of the blame falls on him (if you hold that cheating is wrong, which personally I do), as a daughter knowing this, you had to have resented the women that your father cheated on your mother with. And yet, you decided to become a SP anyway, again knowing that you had a very good chance of seeing a married man at some point. Which again, is fine to me, as a SP if you grilled every client on their martial status, you would have very few customers, but to judge others for cheating is pretty hypocritical. And I know what you're going to say, that you wouldn't have known that these guys would be married so it wouldn't be cheating on your end. But, first of all, if you hadn't found your meal ticket right away, I have a hard time believing you would turn down a regular appointment from a married client even if you found out after the fact that he was married.

Secondly, the whole 'oh I didn't know' policy is pretty weak. Now according to your tidy little narrative, you never had to deal with any of this because you married your first client. Which, fine, whatever, that's your story and you're sticking to it. The point I'm making, is that you had to be comfortable with the concept that you might see a married man (or a guy in any kind of monogamous relationship) and morally you equivocated this action with your previously-held beliefs. Which is fine,everyone's moral code is subject to change pending unusual circumstances, but now to take some morally holier-than-thou attitude is false.

Also, are you sure, beyond any reasonable doubt, that Loki never cheated on his ex-wife with anyone?

1) I booked a week full of men for my first trip to Toronto. I did not book any married men. Did some lie to me? I have no idea. I cannot control liars.

2) Best I could do was ask and refuse married men.

3) I am certain. I even set him up a few times to see if he would cheat with attractive women when we were together.

 

[FatOne]

1) I booked a week full of men for my first trip to Toronto. I did not book any married men. Did some lie to me? I have no idea. I cannot control liars.

Ah shit, anyone know a good Ophthalmologist, I think I hurt myself with vigorous eye rolling.

 

[mrsCALoki]

ah shit, anyone know a good ophthalmologist, i think i hurt myself with vigorous eye rolling.

I cannot believe you cannot resist the urge to read threads I start

You might consider going back to fisting yourself "in playgrounds wearing nothing but fur boots and a gas mask"

 

[mrsCALoki]

Does anyone have experience with mothers moving in? Popular culture has so many jokes about it, but has anyone ever had personal experience?

 

[train]

I still say it's fuji

 

[Possum Trot]

I still say it's fuji

Well she's just as argumentative and full of her/him self. Same ego issues and propensity for just being flat out wrong.

 

[mrsCALoki]

Well she's just as argumentative and full of her/him self. Same ego issues and propensity for just being flat out wrong.

Well he may have 2 times the heads I do, but somehow not so in brains, perhaps. Wrong? about what?

 

[simon482]

Does anyone have experience with mothers moving in? Popular culture has so many jokes about it, but has anyone ever had personal experience?

it wasn't good.

 

[smiley1437]

Does anyone have experience with mothers moving in? Popular culture has so many jokes about it, but has anyone ever had personal experience?

Let's cut to the chase

1. Does your mother adore Loki?
2. Does Loki adore your mother?

I've seen the results firsthand and it's quite a strain even if they're good with each other...and that was in a BIG house, where they were rarely in each other's faces except at meal time.

On a boat, I suspect the stress would be even higher.

 

[mrsCALoki]

Let's cut to the chase

1. Does your mother adore Loki?
2. Does Loki adore your mother?

I've seen the results firsthand and it's quite a strain even if they're good with each other...and that was in a BIG house, where they were rarely in each other's faces except at meal time.

On a boat, I suspect the stress would be even higher.

She adores him and spoils him like crazy.
He says he likes her and seems to enjoy her when we see her.

We talked about it and he is tentatively in agreement. He also said "I told you we needed a bigger boat". Till it arrives it may be a little crowded. But we get a built in baby sitter and a great cook .

 

[mrsCALoki]

it wasn't good.

Can you share a little more?

 

[simon482]

Can you share a little more?

i have a few times. my former mother in law was just not a good person. that's why it didn't work at all. at one point i was supporting 7 people.

 

[mrsCALoki]

i have a few times. my former mother in law was just not a good person. that's why it didn't work at all. at one point i was supporting 7 people.

Oh that would be terrible. I think mom is wonderful and a pretty and a sub by nature. I feel so bad for her, but once she moves in we pretty well have to assume it will be for ever. So it is a huge step. I do not want to endanger my marriage but she really deserves help. I know that the extended family life style is more Asian that western but I am so tempted to ask her to come live with us.

 

[simon482]

Oh that would be terrible. I think mom is wonderful and a pretty and a sub by nature. I feel so bad for her, but once she moves in we pretty well have to assume it will be for ever. So it is a huge step. I do not want to endanger my marriage but she really deserves help. I know that the extended family life style is more Asian that western but I am so tempted to ask her to come live with us.

i had to take my kid and stay with her after a small conflict in apartments. we were told one day and it ended up being nearly 2 months. so we had to stay with her, me my e and my kid. she told us to get out at 9pm on a sunday 3 weeks before the apt. was ready cuz she was annoyed we were sitting in the kitchen laughing and i was eating a bagel. this was after i had paid her rent and a few other bills and got hydro turned back on. then 2 months after we got our apartment she begged us to move in as she had been evicted from subisidized housing. i said fine and went and rented a bigger place, a house actually. that was when he moved in and brought 3 kids with her. they contributed nothing, never paid a dime, got pissed if i didn't bring money and food home and they would each wash the clothes they wanted to wear the next day separately from each other (3 loads of laundry a day consisting of 1 shirt, 1pants, socks and underwear) then when we told them to baby sit instead of paying she said no.

i said i wanted to throw her out and but got convinced other wise. horrible situation.

 

[mrsCALoki]

i had to take my kid and stay with her after a small conflict in apartments. we were told one day and it ended up being nearly 2 months. so we had to stay with her, me my e and my kid. she told us to get out at 9pm on a sunday 3 weeks before the apt. was ready cuz she was annoyed we were sitting in the kitchen laughing and i was eating a bagel. this was after i had paid her rent and a few other bills and got hydro turned back on. then 2 months after we got our apartment she begged us to move in as she had been evicted from subisidized housing. i said fine and went and rented a bigger place, a house actually. that was when he moved in and brought 3 kids with her. they contributed nothing, never paid a dime, got pissed if i didn't bring money and food home and they would each wash the clothes they wanted to wear the next day separately from each other (3 loads of laundry a day consisting of 1 shirt, 1pants, socks and underwear) then when we told them to baby sit instead of paying she said no.

i said i wanted to throw her out and but got convinced other wise. horrible situation.

Oh my that sounds terrible. Oh you poor man.

I suspect mom will ban me from the kitchen and I will never need a baby sitter. She is 45 and a great cook and cleans like her life depended on it. Ironic, her grandmother lived on a boat. Maybe it is a genetic thing.

 

[frankcastle]

Wow is this thread still going on? She asks people here on advice/experience on moving her mom in? The same people unqualified in her mind to give dating advice but okay to share experiences on mom in laws.

Here's a thought talk to your husband on how he feels. Maybe with your money you could get your mom an apartment nearby so that she can visit but both you and her have your own space.

Get a guest house whatever.