Do you give the ring back ?

[Malibook]

the temptation was to just keep wearing it cause its absolutely stunning and i do have a history with him

It's good to know that we are not talking about two strangers.

I can understand a woman who gets dumped not wanting to return the ring, and I could agree with this, but a woman who does the dumping and doesn't offer to return the ring seems totally outrageous to me.

 

[Malibook]

the whole tax issue came up from regarding to Diverdown's comments about contract law in US and Canada.
everything comes down to $$ and taxes!!
whats the point in keeping something if you find out later you have to pay tax on it that you cant afford to pay?
I think of all angles.

The issue of taxes is totally irrelevant here, except maybe to you.

 

[Kya_Jean]

Engagement ring is the only ring you give back when you break off the relationship. You are ending it, you give it back.

Any other rings, or jewelery you keep.

 

[Spanglerdoo]

When i put myself in his shoes ...i do have compassion and sympathic feelings that he really wants this to go through it .

I was just being honest with you guys that its very tempting to still want to wear it since ive been with him 3 years thats all

 

[Malibook]

Woman breaks the engagement....... give it back.
Man breaks the engagement............you keep it.

This makes sense to me.
This is like she gets to keep the down payment for him breaking the contract.

Judge Judy says that it doesn't matter who pulls the plug.
The ring is always returned.

 

[patton]

malibook - i said give the ring back based on the circumstances.
i did not bring up the law etc...
But if somebody is going to give me something ( land , house , jewellery etc)and I find out later that I may have to pay tax on it or have to pay in some other way I will think twice in accepting the " gift"
i have refused " gifts" of all sorts.
take care

 

[happy the man]

i don't need the "cashman" or cash for it ..i find things of very little monetary value sentimental ..this just happens to be very expensive thats all

the temptation was to just keep wearing it cause its absolutely stunning and i do have a history with him

Keep rationaling Spanky. Soon you'll be convinced that he owes you alot more than his expensive ring...just for the priviledge of knowing you! If you have 'fond' memories of him, frame a picture! He sure won't have fond memories if you don't give him that option taking it back! I'm outta this thread. It makes me sick!

Such a simple, moral (and probably legally clear) answer gone awire...

 

[Rockload6]

When i put myself in his shoes ...i do have compassion and sympathic feelings that he really wants this to go through it .

I was just being honest with you guys that its very tempting to still want to wear it since ive been with him 3 years thats all

So you would prefer the look of a diamond on your finger over the feelings of a human.

Materialism has really fucked up our society seriously.

Your basing your decision because it looks so good. Apparently diamonds are the way to a girls heart.

Fuck my life.

 

[gramage]

When i put myself in his shoes ...i do have compassion and sympathic feelings that he really wants this to go through it .

I was just being honest with you guys that its very tempting to still want to wear it since ive been with him 3 years thats all

Your not a bad person for considering it, it's natural to WANT to keep something nice, I think we all (or at least most of us) get that. I'm just saying that it wouldn't be a fair thing to actually DO

 

[Don]

Woman breaks the engagement....... give it back.
Man breaks the engagement............you keep it.

Exactly

 

[diverdown]

the temptation was to just keep wearing it cause its absolutely stunning and i do have a history with him

Any new man in your life might be a little anxious even worried knowing you still choose to wear the engagement ring of your former fiancé.

FYI....Googled engagement ring law and got this from a Canadian legal advice site:

"About Marriage in Canada
Some of the information below may be taken from common law and would therefore not necessarily be applicable to the province of Quebec although, in many aspects, the Civil Code and Quebec jurisprudence mirrors common law principles in this subject matter.

Marriage is the state-recognized, voluntary and exclusive contract for the lifelong union of two persons.

On engagements
You can't sue for breach of promise of marriage anymore in B.C., Manitoba or Ontario. Alberta still allows these types of court actions.

When engagement rings are given before the engagement is broken off, the rule is whoever broke off the engagement forfeits the ring. So if your boyfriend decides that he doesn't want to get married after giving you an engagement ring, you can keep the ring. But if the woman decides to break off the engagement after accepting the ring, she has to return it to her suitor."

http://www.duhaime.org/LegalResources/FamilyLaw/LawArticle-34/Marriage-in-Canada.aspx

BOL, both decisions you are making must be very tough.

 

[BallzDeep]

You seem crazy, you'll be doing him a favour by ending it, please do it as soon as possible, and turn gay, please.

Have the imaginary person that is following you return it for you, if you can't do it yourself.

 

[Thousand]

Keep the precious!!!!

 

[Hurricane Hank]

Any woman who breaks off an engagement and doesn't INSIST on returning the ring, is a person with no respect for anyone.
Not to be too dramatic, but thats the same as telling the guy you don't respect him, or love him. Don't be a scumbag. Insist on returning it, don't just offer.

So many people have no morals, or values. Don't be one of them.

 

[skypilot]

Be like a normal woman, fuck the guy over good. Keep the ring, tell him you will give him blow jobs to make up for the price of the ring. On the first one scrape the head of the guys dick with your teeth until it is raw. He will be glad to let you keep the ring.

If you had to even ask the question I know where you are coming from.

 

[rafterman]

You sound like a douchebag to me and ring back or not this guy would be well rid of you.

It doesn't matter who breaks off the engagement. The ring is in contemplation of a marriage if the marriage does not occur then the ring is returned end of story.

Did I tell you I think your a douchebag yet.

 

[diverdown]

You sound like a douchebag to me and ring back or not this guy would be well rid of you.

It doesn't matter who breaks off the engagement. The ring is in contemplation of a marriage if the marriage does not occur then the ring is returned end of story.

Did I tell I think your a douchebag yet.

Don't sugarcoat it rafter tell her what you really think!

 

[lawyerman]

Spanglerdoo... have a sit down chat with the guy, tell him how you feel and offer him the ring back. Depending on his situation, he may not want it back... but at least let him make that choice.

Just my nickles worth.

I agree completely.

Don't prolong the situation and deal with it. This guy needs to get on with his life and if you do care for him as a friend, then do this immediately.

Not sure if he will be your friend after this though.

 

[train]

Obviously i want to do the right thing cause i do still care for him i'm not sure if we are soulmates though

.

If you want to do the right thing why are you even asking the question. If you don't know that the right thing is to give it back I have to question whether you can actually tell right from wrong.

 

[tboy]

I'm not surprised the the women you asked said keep it and the men you asked said return it.

Women generally just don't get integrity and honor the way men do.

Exactly.

Offer to return the ring, if he says no, sell it and give the money to charity.

The ring is a symbol of his committment to you and you accepting it is a symbol of your committment to him.

Soulmates? LOL FFS. soulmates is a concept invented by the credit card companies.

A female friend of mine was toiling over a proposal by a male friend and she said "but he isn't my soulmate, I love him as a friend". I said to her: Well, would you rather be passionately in love and marry someone to have it last 5 yrs or would you rather love a someone deeply as a friend and be happy with him for 50 yrs"?

What's that saying? A flame that burns twice as hot burns half as long?

offer to give the ring back!