Date an escort or stripper?

[RTRD]

First...

I'm sorry if you felt I was "hating" on you. That certainly wasn't my intention, rather I responded to a question you posed to me. A few actually. If you feel exposed because your words have proven to be biased and/or sexest, I cannot help that, only hope you see it.

Lastly, while you may think it prudent to presuppose a person/profession/situation, I'm afraid that puts everyone and everything into a neat little box. I don't need to tell you that before 2 months ago, I had never considered escorting, and had only been in one long-term, loving, healthy relationship (7 yrs ). I also don't need to tell you I'm a full-time student, child's rights advocate, and social worker. Or that the term "you're an escort" is just as mindless as seeing one's skin colour or race or religion rather than everything which makes up that person. which makes them beautiful and unique. But I also suppose you didn't know I was a bilingual insurace claimes specialist and mortgage rep and amoung many other things, love to cook, and crotchet. that I'm a sister and daughter and friend to many. that I hate social injustice almost as much hypocricy (shown above). and finally, while you would love to relegate me to the "escorts for life" box, I only work when I am able, after all of my other priorities and aspirations and relationships have been fullfilled and I chose to do so. not because I need drugs or am of low self-esteem or need a false sense of love, or companionship. perhaps those are the driving forces in your life...? (no insult intended, I am speaking as openly and frankly as I can in the cyber world that has only you words to go by) but because I want to. I am able to earn money doing something that I enjoy.

...I get to be biased. I said as much. I don't have to be open minded in regards to who I enter into a relationship with.

Second...all that you list still has nothing to do with the fact that you are apparently comfortable escorting...while the vast majority of women would not be. THAT difference...the ability to reduce sex to a transactional act that can be performed with a stranger without emotional connection...is not something I'd want in an SO.

BTW....you are REALLY getting defensive...you are rejecting things I never said...or even implied, when really...for me, it comes down to this:

"because I want to."

I would not want to be in a serious relationship with someone who would want to. I get to make that choice. Why it bothers you so much that you have to go on a rant explaining what a great person you are seems to speak to a bit of insecurity about the choice you made.

 

[TigerJane]

Please don't take me the wrong way, but how are you trustworthy when you are cheating on your husband and in a serious affair with OM for 8 years?

I was not cheating on my husband, as we have/had an open marriage - we did lifestyle. For me not being with my husband is a completely different story and is not part of this discussion.

What I do find to be part of this disscussion, is the fact that even when former trade workers deside to be devoted to just one and have proven many times of their faithfulness, they are still doughted. Why should we be given more dought than a "civilian"?

Everyone pays for sex, one way or another. Whether it be cash, trinkets, house or a lifetime together. And there are "civilain" relationships that are way more dangerous than this business will ever be.

 

[hickorysticks]

MLAM this will be my last response to you on this topic for I belive we are having quite the miscommunication.

1) Of course you can chose who you want to be in a relationship with! I never said otherwise. whether stripper, sp, "civilian" as you say, or a man, that is completely your perogative. this neither makes me feel less than or defensive towards you. if you are not comfortable dating an sp, I can certainly empathize and you must alwasy stay true to yourself.

2) The entire basis of my responses have been in direct correlation to things you stated. or asked. It was clear by your implication upon me, when you said I think differently because I'm an "escort", that you feel escorts are different than "civilian woman. I chose to share *facts* about my life (not verbs accenting my "great person") simply to respond to that in itself. I do view myself as a civilian woman. with thoughts and views that perhaps contradict the sp livestyle, but so do many "civilian's" actions contradict their vocation. some are just more honest about it.

I do hope we can still be terb friends!

 

[RTRD]

That depends...

I do hope we can still be terb friends!

..are you hot? Do you have a nice round juicy booty?

 

[TigerJane]

Yes doubt is the correct spelling - hey no one is perfect, but we can strive for honesty.

 

[a 1 player]

Yes doubt is the correct spelling - hey no one is perfect, but we can strive for honesty.

Believe me when I say that it is sometimes better to keep ones mouth closed than to be honest.

 

[TigerJane]

Believe me when I say that it is sometimes better to keep ones mouth closed than to be honest.

True as I have been finding out - as I am doubted because I was a dancer.
When most people find out I was a dancer, they always question my judgement, intelligence, and education. It is like all of a sudden I am stupid.
So maybe it is better to never tell your signifigant other that you were or are in the trade.

 

[svtcobra]

Very few men can deal with it. I'm one of those very few.

It boils down to the ground rules established at the beginning of the relationship. As long as those rules are not broken, there is no lost trust. Once you lose the trust, then the relationship is over.

That being said, get over it.

Sheik has pretty much hit it on the nail head, and being straight forward. It does take a "special" type of man to deal with it.

Learn from you're mistakes and move on, if and when you meet someone who is in/out of the industry again, hopefully you will know what you have to deal with from you're past experience, and move the relationship forward or not to to pursue it.

 

[skypilot]

Even though the date an escort, stripper, mpa threads get very repetitive, there is always enough new interesting stuff in them that keeps them fresh.
I have dated an mpa (longer term) and a dancer (shorter term) and they ended disasterously. However so have my relationships with two nurses, postal worker, cop, bartender, customs officer, and school teacher, so I guess for me it doesn't matter what they do.

 

[JD75]

I find you wont find someone to be happy and in love with someone if your can't understand or get mad at all the small faults.

Forgive, forget, and forgive again.

Uhm, your significant other being an escort and not letting you know before you get into a serious relationship with them is not what I'd consider a small fault.

 

[TigerJane]

Sheik has pretty much hit it on the nail head, and being straight forward. It does take a "special" type of man to deal with it.

Learn from you're mistakes and move on, if and when you meet someone who is in/out of the industry again, hopefully you will know what you have to deal with from you're past experience, and move the relationship forward or not to to pursue it.

Yes it does take a special man.
I have had two in my life and I thought I had a third.
My first was when I was 17. He was 20 yrs my senior and taught me how to please a man and supported my decision to become a dancer. This relationship lasted 10 yrs.
The second man I married. He was totally delighted that I was a dancer. This relationship is unfortunately coming to a close after 20+ yrs.
Now my third has been for 8 yrs. I am hoping it will continue.

So with stats like that, yes dating or having a longtime great relationship with an industry worker does work.

 

[TigerJane]

Agreed....

Neither of my first 2 relationship failed due to a lack of trust.
Actually neither of those relationships failed, other dynamics caused changed in the relationships. I am still in constant contact with my first, he is still my best friend and lives in another country. I also still see my husband, we just do not have sex any more.

 

[amber-jade]

amber made a few posts on this thread.
so i think i will take a swing at it too.if thats ok?

hi everyone it's justin

ok, i'll be the 1st to admit maybe our situation is a little bit different then others who attempt a full and proper relationship in this lifestyle,
for a few reasons

1st being,
we do many of the appts as a couple, and started in the sp world doing so, aj's 1on1 activity started much afterwards.- & i trully think it's hot -

2nd
we do come from the ''swingers'' lifestyle, maybe you can call it a ''cuckold'' lifestyle.

3rd
aj and i have been a couple for over 3 years ''live together''
with knowing each other for the 10 years prior to that as best friends, we have -ZERO- secrets, an enjoy the open lifestyle we both have always wanted / craved for many years.

jealousy IS NOT part of our life, or thoughts.
simply put , there is no place for that in a true -open - honest-loving-relationship.and this lifestyle.

yes i do admit, it was part of our lives, and have both experienced that SICK feeling of emotions .
( not as a couple, i mean in previous lives )
let me let say this,
when you break past that '' jealousy'' the sky's the limit.and possibilites are enless, in building a relationship that will indeed pass the test of time
IMO

we have both been married in the past
HELL MY EX AND I WENT TO AJ'S WEDDING.

so maybe due to our past and open knowledge of each other are we able to life this lifestyle, fair enough.

i have met many terb members during our stay here,
those of you who i have had the pleasure of meeting have been incredibily nice when doing so.
and we both look forward to seeing many more at the
terb christmas party on the 4th

stay safe, and be yourself,
if you don't ,who the hell will?


justin

 

[Serpent]

Yes it does take a special man.
I have had two in my life and I thought I had a third.
My first was when I was 17. He was 20 yrs my senior and taught me how to please a man and supported my decision to become a dancer. This relationship lasted 10 yrs.
The second man I married. He was totally delighted that I was a dancer. This relationship is unfortunately coming to a close after 20+ yrs.
Now my third has been for 8 yrs. I am hoping it will continue.

So with stats like that, yes dating or having a longtime great relationship with an industry worker does work.

Can I ask what was the socio-economic background of these men?

 

[TigerJane]

Can I ask what was the socio-economic background of these men?

1st is British Upper Middle class and 2nd is Canadian Upper Middle class, both white.

 

[The Bandit]

Tiger Jane Jones?

 

[TigerJane]

Thank you Justin for your response.

Some how I have made a misunderstanding of my jealousy and how I ended up here.
I am jealous that I was not allow nor invited to come along and play with him and the ladies.
I am not angry at him for venturing out.
Hell I am the mistress, and I have a large appetite too.
I know he is unable to share me with other men and that is ok, because there toys for assisstance. But there are no toys that add another women or two,or three to the menu.
I would so enjoy giving him this pleasurable feast!

Is that such a bad thing to give to someone you love?

 

[Angela@Mirage]

I believe once a girl starts to escort and then gives it up it is so easy too return when the money is not there on your regular job.
I had met a girl through a local agency ; and then one day she was walking down street. She waved me down and we chatted a bit and
She invited me too her house and we had sex. Then I find out >>
She gave up the agency and is going too school ::??? but has regulars coming too her house . Her boyfriend goes into another room and she does her thing. She says he is OK with it ::??
She gave me her number and Maybe someday I will call ..
But it does seem a bit different that her boyfriend that she has a child with lets her ESCORT in the next room .
When I asked her she said sometimes that money is the difference between food for the kid or not .
Not sure what he does for a living but I thought I wanted too think about it before going back LOL

That is an unfortunate situation. Her boyfreind was probably her pimp.

 

[TigerJane]

Tiger Jane Jones?

Sorry to bust your happy thought, but I am not her.

 

[dreamblade]

That is an unfortunate situation. Her boyfreind was probably her pimp.

Possibly, or were stable enough in their relationship to accept her chosen profession? Like Amber-Jade and Justin here.

Eh! I like to think the best about people, keeps me from sinking too much into cynicism.