Ive met her at an afterhours club( shes russian). By the time ive found out she was a working girl--we were a couple already. Sadly to say, we ended our relationship after 1 year. Guys , you wouldnt believed the BS that she went thru. Btw i became a member at TERB because of her job. When i found out her menu thats when i ended our relationship.She checked her reviews and took them very seriously. Just wanna know if any TERBITES gone out with an escort?
Date an escort or stripper?
- Thread starter goldfish71
- Start date
Not to rain on your parade here, but this has been discussed ad nauseum. The search function is your friend.
For the record, yes I dated and escort and a dancer (different women at different times) each for a short time. I would not do it again.
For the record, yes I dated and escort and a dancer (different women at different times) each for a short time. I would not do it again.
tommy2bit said:
roflmao...at good man...&...serious relationship
true thou...most men could never handle it..thats a given..
it takes a special/caring man with an open mind.....
also someone non-judgemental....
someone who cares and loves you for who you are...
NOT what you do...
trust is huge as well...knowing that she would never leave you for someone she may meet.
not unlike being in a loving relationship, and actively involved in the swinger lifestyle
( no i'm not comparing the two..just the mindset )
.
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Wait a sec, hold the phone.amber-jade said:
This seems to imply that if a man chooses not to get involved with someone in the industry, or that a relationship with someone on the industry falls apart, the man is not caring, does not have an open mind, is judgemental and all the rest.
That's just as bad as saying that all the women in the industry are (insert prejudgements here).
Neither is true as a blanket, catch-all statement.
Razon said:
How arrogant and condescending of you. There are lots of people who will simply not accept their SO being an SP and it does not mean they have anything to learn. It is just not for them.
It's the exceptional person who doesn't care that their GF spends her time fucking other guys.
Always good advice, but sometimes you have to move on before you can do that.
Wait a damned minute!
Sheik said:Very few men can deal with it. I'm one of those very few. QUOTE]
Male escorts/strippers don't count!!
Sheik said:
I'm with you 100%. I've dated strippers in the past (met them as a client and we went on from there). I haven't dated an SP yet, but I'm open to the idea. Face it, we meet people every day, and it's up to us to decide to sleep with them or not, based on your ethics and the agreement you've made with your SO.
I will amend one thing you said, Sheik: rules in the relationship cannot be set in stone. If something doesn't feel right to you or your partner later on, don't just say to yourself "well, we agreed on it, so I have to abide by that". Re-negotiate.
We evolve as people, so do our needs, so must our relationships.
As long as people are honest about their needs, ethics, and feelings, your occupation doesn't matter.
tommy2bit said:
That may be your personal view, but you're wrong, dead wrong. I know of at least 2 SP's who have a wonderful relationship with caring attentive partners, and I don't know that many SP's. You may not understand this, but sex and love are two separate things. An SP may get lots of sex on the job, but still may need tenderness, intimacy, and companionship when her day is done. That's where the SO comes in.
Furthermore, your assumption that a woman must be high maintenance just because she's in the sex trade is completely baseless. Just scour the lounge, if you need proof, some have posted how they live in threads past. Sweeping generalisations are always wrong. Stop seeing the world in black and white.
Love and relationships are a funny thing
I find it funny how both sp's and johns can judge people so quickly here considering it is a symbiotic relationship that we share. We both need each other to exist. That being said, relationships are funny in general. we have things we want from them, yet we never want to truly give it to the other.
As for the guy who started this thread, I have a feeling there was a connection and the sex was amazing and that has been on his mind ever since. I don't blame him, all of us guys have met a hot girl in our lives and remember what it felt like. So much so, we forget that there was a good bunch of pain to what we went through (Come on guys, and ladies, the sp didn't tell him she was an sp, kind of a big thing - it's like an sp falling in love with a client only to find out he is married when he said he wasn't)
Honestly, Sheik was right, both parties have to lay down grounds of trust and ideas of what they want and it has to be followed. If the rules are followed and people are getting what they want, then everything usually works out. however, if those lines of trust are broken, it is best that both of you walk away as the relationship can never be repaired. Most Johns and sp's have fragile ego's and when those ego's are broken it takes forever to fix.
I know myself, I would never be able to handle it because I like to say what is mine IS mine. Just like you ladies out there like to lay claim to what is yours IS yours.
Nice to see this topic still brings out the passion in people. Now lets see if we can bring back some romance into this world. that would rock.
I find it funny how both sp's and johns can judge people so quickly here considering it is a symbiotic relationship that we share. We both need each other to exist. That being said, relationships are funny in general. we have things we want from them, yet we never want to truly give it to the other.
As for the guy who started this thread, I have a feeling there was a connection and the sex was amazing and that has been on his mind ever since. I don't blame him, all of us guys have met a hot girl in our lives and remember what it felt like. So much so, we forget that there was a good bunch of pain to what we went through (Come on guys, and ladies, the sp didn't tell him she was an sp, kind of a big thing - it's like an sp falling in love with a client only to find out he is married when he said he wasn't)
Honestly, Sheik was right, both parties have to lay down grounds of trust and ideas of what they want and it has to be followed. If the rules are followed and people are getting what they want, then everything usually works out. however, if those lines of trust are broken, it is best that both of you walk away as the relationship can never be repaired. Most Johns and sp's have fragile ego's and when those ego's are broken it takes forever to fix.
I know myself, I would never be able to handle it because I like to say what is mine IS mine. Just like you ladies out there like to lay claim to what is yours IS yours.
Nice to see this topic still brings out the passion in people. Now lets see if we can bring back some romance into this world. that would rock.
Razon said:
Wrong. There are lines which, once cross, end relationships, and people who know where their lines are, and end relationships when the line is crossed, are acting appropriately and have nothing whatever to learn from you.
He tried to accept her as an SP but when he saw her menu he realized he simply couldn't do it, and as a mature adult did the right thing and cut it off before too many people got hurt. Congratulations for him for freeing both of them to move on to other people--now she can go look for someone who does accept her.
Sounds to me like he's sad the line got crossed, but he knows where the line is. His grip on relationships seems, to me, sounder than yours.
Maybe you are the one who should learn from him.
I'm not saying there is anything wrong with dating an SP, just that it's not for some people. It's a sign of maturity when you know that it's not for you, and you put a stop to it. Not to do that would result in a bad, stressful, and unhappy situation for both of them.
What you are urging him to do sounds like co-dependence.
capncrunch said:
Seems like that has already been said in spades. Seems like a normal action from a woman to make the same blanket statement in return.
I find it funny that most are about "what is mine is mine" and yet they are a bunch of liars and cheats. LOL
I don't think I would be able to do it. A retired SP, absolutely, but I would not be able to if she were still working.
Slightly off topic but here's an example of how Terb helps me out in real world civilian dating:
I'm at a dance event last week with a civi date and I'm fading fast...one disadvantage of dating girls 18-23 is that they have much more energy than I do at my age haha. Anyway, I'm trying to nudge us back to our table and off the dance floor but she wants to keep dancing. Then this guy comes over in between dances and asks politely if he could cut in. She says nervously "You'll have to ask him (me)" and so he bows slightly to me and asks if he could please have one dance with her and he'd bring her back to my table right afterward. He's in my age range. So since Terbites believe in sharing the ladies - the Terb brotherhood is all about share and share alike - I agree and head blissfully for my chair to rest these bones. When in need of rest, another Terbite will take up the slack. Don't know if he was a Terbite - but I'm just saying pass the love around.
After the dance she returns to my/our table and says how impressed she is at how cool I am to allow that, as her previous b/f would have punched the guy just for asking, and it shows how sophiticated I am and that is why she likes older men like me - our worldliness. So that worked out well. Seriously, if they like you they'll come back to your table eventually. Share the love I say.
I'm at a dance event last week with a civi date and I'm fading fast...one disadvantage of dating girls 18-23 is that they have much more energy than I do at my age haha. Anyway, I'm trying to nudge us back to our table and off the dance floor but she wants to keep dancing. Then this guy comes over in between dances and asks politely if he could cut in. She says nervously "You'll have to ask him (me)" and so he bows slightly to me and asks if he could please have one dance with her and he'd bring her back to my table right afterward. He's in my age range. So since Terbites believe in sharing the ladies - the Terb brotherhood is all about share and share alike - I agree and head blissfully for my chair to rest these bones. When in need of rest, another Terbite will take up the slack. Don't know if he was a Terbite - but I'm just saying pass the love around.
After the dance she returns to my/our table and says how impressed she is at how cool I am to allow that, as her previous b/f would have punched the guy just for asking, and it shows how sophiticated I am and that is why she likes older men like me - our worldliness. So that worked out well. Seriously, if they like you they'll come back to your table eventually. Share the love I say.
alexmst said:
I would have done the same.. its just a dance.
but on a side note I never understood why a stranger would want to cut in to dance with another stranger thats clearly with someone? whats the point? I'd rather just get another drink at the bar
.
bob_sapp said:
An sp, does not make $300 on "her back". Especially if she is employed by an agency. Usually it equals to about 80/hr not including travel time, which takes just as long as the call. I'm sorry, but it amounts to approx. $40/h, which if indie, is the same as she has the book the room and or continually buy the clothes/toys that will please men, as well as updating her website. So that being said, an sp making $40/hr which also has to act as a counsellor, friend, lover, porn-star, nurse and various other roles she must enact to earn this living does come at a high cost. How many others do you know that do all this while trying to fullfill a person's need and are incredibly aware of their scruples?
I'm sorry if you think that the escort's job is easy, but it isin't. I've had severe back pain for days due to being bent over for hours on end. Or a sore throat by a client whom was sick and still wanted his rockers off. Or a sore cookie because the man thought I was a piece of meat, not a woman. Of course the money is more than I would make ordinarily starting out as a teacher or nurse, but it does come with it's hazards and pains. Please remember that.
*I've worked as both a nanny and a secretary and neither could have prepared for what I encountered as an sp*
