27 Year Old Virgin - My Sad Story

[yolosohobby]

OP, for what it's worth, I agree that an SP is not the answer. Your virginity isn't the issue. It's being able to form a connection with a woman that you want and escalating that to a sexual relationship. Losing your virginty to a pro isn't going to address whatever issues you have with self-esteem, assertiveness, etc. In fact, the danger is you sexually imprint on play-for-pay and don't learn any other avenue of sexual gratification. Prostitution is for guys in mid-life that are either unsatisfied with what they have, or are past the age of being able to attract a 24 year old hottie.

Ever notice how the perpetually single guys are the ones with the highest standards? As if only the hottest girl in the room is worthy of their time and effort? That's a reflection of low self-esteem.

The ability to hook up is a skill like anything else, and the key is that you get better with practice. In general, the hotter the girl, the more game you need to get her. My recommendation to anyone in your shoes is to start with the girl that you can get, and trade up from there. Sounds heartless, but that's how it works. Thing is, you may meet someone worth keeping fairly early on.

I disagree. The conventional timing for first sexual encounters for the OP has passed him by. He needs shock treatment and he needs it now. 10 SPs in a month will put some swagger in his step and the civilian ladies will "smell it" on him. Then he can take your approach ....

 

[DigitallyYours]

I ended up exchanging numbers with an attractive blonde. ... I'm just not totally into her, ...

This just about sums everything up.

 

[slydevil]

Visit an mp so you can get used to the touch of a woman without all the baggage of it being your 'first'. Your problem is not fucking or your lack thereof, it's your inexperience with intimacy.

 

[dinkiez]

I feel you bro, though I'm not a virgin I was in a relationship for few years and she was saving it for marriage. I can see how you feel but you have start opening your eyes to how great this world can be, and sex was great the last time I remember.

It's been so long though I feel my penis has fallen off or something.

Anyway, I gotten shy since my ex, I guess because I was so used to her and how she was I totally forgot what the real world was about, it's strange if you are with a controlling person you tend to think that is the norm and it makes you into a different person then you once were.

Well, you can start by talking to random girls asking for time and smiling, start small talk about where you are going and where she is going.
It works pretty well on the ttc, bus or street car, if you feel awkward you ring the bell and just say oh it's my stop if the vibe isn' going well.
I can tell you this works well for my shyness and help me build a little confidence.

I know that when you see someone you're interested in, you get all frazzled up because you fear that you might say the wrong thing but you shouldn't be thinking that ,if I don't find out who this girl is, I will never see her again. Not all the time a girl who you think is pretty will be attracted to you, remember that, that's life, you lose sometimes.
Hopefully you get over your fear, it's hard but everyday you move closer to being the person you want to be.

 

[Mr. Lucky]

Take a trip to Cuba :eyebrows:

 

[red]

I've come back to this thread out of curiosity and I'm amazed that it's still getting some responses, even though I sort of ended it a while ago. To clarify some things, my original post might have been a bit over dramatic and made me sound more sad than I am, but it probably was my somber mood that day. I don't regret posting this, it's given me some outsider opinions.

I've had the chance to date girls and sleep with them in the past, but I was either not attracted to them or I liked them but got butterflies in the stomach and I tend to freeze up. There were nights I would walk home hitting myself in the head thinking why didn't I just say that.

I wouldn't say I'm shy, but introverted and quiet by nature. And I'm not like this in other parts of my life, just with approaching women I really, really like.

I got a private message from a member here and he's right in saying that sleeping with a SP (even though I'm somewhat frustrated) is the easy way out and isn't going to solve the bigger problem. I need to get laid the hard way. That's by getting out of my shell, shedding the fear of rejection and actually connecting with someone.

This thread and some of the responses made me think. I started going out with a friend who I finished school with. He's known for bedding a new girl ever week and I've asked him to teach me the ropes. We went out last night and he helped me strike up some conversations. Given some of them were awkward at first and I wasn't vibing off some of the girls and vice versa, but heck I had fun and it helped me break out of my shell a bit.

I ended up exchanging numbers with an attractive blonde. Assistant, likes doing ballet on her spare time and she's a foody. We went out the next day for burgers for lunch. I'm not sure if it's going to led to anything long term or serious. I'm just not totally into her, but it was fun and I'm just going with the flow and opening myself up more.

"not totally into her"- so what? just get laid already- civilian or sp- stop building it up to be this extraordinary experience- its about having fun.