Also look at what her mother looks like because she will likely look like that in 20 years.
What is your best piece of advice for a young man about to get married or live together?
- Thread starter barnacler
- Start date
Each needs to have their own money. Share expenses obviously but a separate bank account and CC are key.
The opportunity for a separate vacation also works. I go away without her at least once a year, she can as well.
Teasing should always be allowed and encouraged. During the Pandemic as we were basically stuck together we perfected it and enjoyed it. Especially good ones recieved high fives. We had lots of fun with it.
Separate the chores evenly and get them done!
Bug killing is always the guys job. When the call comes for it(and I recognize that tone anywhere) I don't delay. Kill dispose, get heroic kiss and back to whatever you were doing.
The opportunity for a separate vacation also works. I go away without her at least once a year, she can as well.
Teasing should always be allowed and encouraged. During the Pandemic as we were basically stuck together we perfected it and enjoyed it. Especially good ones recieved high fives. We had lots of fun with it.
Separate the chores evenly and get them done!
Bug killing is always the guys job. When the call comes for it(and I recognize that tone anywhere) I don't delay. Kill dispose, get heroic kiss and back to whatever you were doing.
Marriage and hobbying don’t mix. Going to a safe strip club might be the most guilt free of all hobbying activities. Otherwise youll be living your life with lies and constantly hiding/sneaking. That can be tiresome. It can be done. But one false move and good luck.
Don’t let her quit her job. In fact, if you can work out a pay cut on the books so she makes more than him, do it. That way when the divorce comes she will be the seem as the breadwinner in the family and hopefully the courts will award you spousal support.
if she mentions something she likes or wants in passing, make a note of it. then once every week or so, surprise her with that thing. it could be a physical object, an action, or a place she wants to go to. it'll make her feel like you're listening and like you still care. truly do half the chores, and do them well. check in every few months and ask her if she feels like you're pulling your weight when it comes to house chores and house stuff. listen, and act accordingly. go to therapy and work on your emotional intelligence to become a better communicator to deepen your partnership. <3
Remember, she isn't always right , she is just never wrong.
Insist on at least 1 night a month to go out with the boys, then don't waste it on the boys.
If and when you split remember that her idea of splitting everything in 1/2 means she gets her 1/2 and 1/2 of your 1/2
Good luck
Insist on at least 1 night a month to go out with the boys, then don't waste it on the boys.
If and when you split remember that her idea of splitting everything in 1/2 means she gets her 1/2 and 1/2 of your 1/2
Good luck
Find someone who you feel good around. Someone who makes you laugh, makes you think, someone that engages you so much it becomes a turn on. Marry your best friend. Don't compromise on your fundamentals, but learn to recognize what those are and roll with everything else.
I am scared of mice and rats. It is the house cat's job to kill them.
And the moment I see a flying cockroach my response is to run away
for cover in a nanosecond. No scream for help from her could make me
smash it.
What about scrubbing the toilet bowel?
I do dust and vacuum. We split outdoor work. She does bathroom and kitchen. I cook most days. We have it figured out. Split off odd jobs, work together on others. I handle maintenance.
Fortunately no vermin. Just occasional spiders and house centipedes.
Make sure your love languages are compatible.
The five love languages are five different ways of expressing and receiving love: words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch.
If you're off on that it can be agonizing.
The five love languages are five different ways of expressing and receiving love: words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch.
If you're off on that it can be agonizing.
So did I. At first. But not everyone does all these. Not everyone needs all these things. Couldn't give 2 shits about receiving gifts.I always thought this was kinda ridiculous. We all need all of these things
But when you have a person who needs touch, but doesn't get it, he or she feels lonely and disconnects. I've seen it happen multiple times. Each divorce amongst any friend had that element, and what each partner felt was most important was not the same. Going at it like rabbits gets you through the first few years of a relationship, but after that...
For example, the boyfriend never said said too often he loves his gf Yet, he dropped everything and flew cross country to fix her bike because she needed it to get to uni during graduate school.
Here she needs affirmation, he's doing acts of service, and both feel unappreciated and their partner may not truly love them.
For me it's only acts of service and physical touch. Words of affirmation, quality time and receiving gifts I don't really care for.I always thought this was kinda ridiculous. We all need all of these things
Same goes for desser at a restaurant. You don't always have to share...its ok to each get a dessert. Otherwise you always just get what one of you likes.
