So i met a nymph...

[surferboy]

whats a troll really look like, anyways?

are we talking a troll that looks similar to the one that lives under the bridge and doesn't let anyone cross without paying a sixpence?

Blonde, blue eyed, 6'3, 205lb. Ex swimwear model, sunshine boy (I was coerced by a hot photographer), gym calendar model. And yourself ?

great sig line I read somewhere forgotten: "every guy wants a girl who likes a lot of sex, until he gets a girl who likes a lot of sex."

Never thought I would admit it, but I think I met a women that's too much for me. Be perfect for the Wills guy that can have 8 shots in a row!

You two seem pretty adventurous. Tell her you'll agree to parents bed and church if she'll do a "Spectator Sex" show with you at Oasis. http://oasisaqualounge.com/event/spectator-sex-2/?instance_id=45649



I'm with you on that.

How about something like this. http://xhamster.com/movies/494590/sex_in_the_stadium_l7.html

I'm not that adventurous anymore, i'd rather stay in on a Saturday nite watch a movie have a nice tryst on the couch or bed & fall asleep. She's like the fukkin energizer bunny & wants to go at it till 3 or 4 in the morning! Would have given my left one to meet her in my teens or 20's but I've already done most the stuff she wants to do & don't feel the need to do it again

 

[Kirby2006]

Good one big!!

You've solved your own dilemma surfboy: no parent's bed , no church basement , no nymph. Simple!!

 

[GPIDEAL]

LOL @ Schlong Connery's post.

Good suggestions Gameboy27.

@ Surferboy,

I took two prominent SPs (at separate times of course) to my big childhood home (when nobody was home), and fucked them in various rooms (but not my mother's) for that extra sizzle in my sex life. If you can't get your nymph back, I'd like to up the ante with her, and you can live vicariously through me. You can PM me her #.

 

[Vermeer27]

Actually I dated a nymphomaniac once and it was fun at first, until I realized it was just the tip of the iceberg in terms of her impulse control problems. You may be in for quite a roller coaster ride. I quit when I realized that someone completely controlled by their appetites isn't that sexy after all.

 

[Titalian]

Not like its a bad thing! She's a 23yr old speciality nurse & we hit it off right away. She could get laid 5x a day & still want more, never encountered a women like this. Problem is she wants to fuck everywhere in public & at her parents house(still lives at home). Now don't get me wrong I don't have much shame & had no problem getting a bj from her in a glass elevator of a very tall hotel, bending her over in a stall of a popular dt bar, numerous places where she works etc. But I had to draw the line when she said lets do it on my parents bed & in the downstairs of her church. Hate being called a chicken too!

Now the problem is she won't have sex with me until I give in & do it in one of the two places. I'll admit to finger bangin two girls in church when I was a teen & taggin my second girlfriend on her parents bed when they went away for the wknd. But fuk i'm a grown man now & having not even met the parents just out of respect I can't do it. Which brings me back to the church, how bad is it to tag a girl in church to get back in the sack with her? Oh the dilemma's of being tall blonde & single lol

Don't be overwhelmed, this is the typical story from this handle. Why he would expose this, says it all.

 

[Aardvark154]

Nymphs and Satyr - William-Adolphe Bouguereau

 

[Mr Bret]

I can't see what the problem is with the church basement, other than getting access when there isn't a crowd around, unless you're a very religious guy.
Judging by this and a number of your other posts, I can't for the life of me believe that you're overly religious. If you are, that's some kind of liberal religion you follow.

 

[|2 /-\ | /|/]

Nymphs and Satyr - William-Adolphe Bouguereau

Kind of looks like Dan Blizerian

 

[surferboy]

Well after a couple sext's from my little nymph Saturday nite I caved & picked her up this morning for church. She wore a long coat ,classy stockings & a cute pair of shoes. Looked like a respectable catholic girl heading to church... Pulled in about half hour early & not too many cars yet, was kinda having seconds thoughts & she said relax were not doing anything wrong. She walked in the side door & told me she'd text me where to go. Five mins later I got the text, walked in the side door & headed down stairs. Heart racing a little opened the third door on my left,closed my eyes as instructed & walked in. Let the door close & heard her say can you help me find my pencil I think it fell behind the desk. Opened my eyes & almost busted in my pants seeing her bent over the teachers desk in her school girl outfit with no panties! Can't say as I've ever been a big fan of role play but this was the best fucking surprise I've had all year. The effin door didn't have a lock so I jammed a chair under the handle to keep it from opening before we got busy & being she's a moaner had to turn on a cassette player with you guessed it church hymns. Other than that any hesitation I had left after seeing her bent over the desk! One thing struck me as a little strange, she called me Mr so & so a few times. Said it was her track & field coach & she always had a crush on him. But hey having a little hottie bent over the desk in the sunday school room she coulda called me anything she wanted lol. And fack I was about to tell her to take a hike Saturday after she texted my a dozen times when I was trying to get a report done!

For you guys that haven't dabbled in role play, try the schoolgirl outfit thing with a young girl & see if you can resist that. If you can your a better man than me! To the rest of the family that's deeply seeded in the church sorry i'm going to hell & there's no turning back!

 

[destillat]

 

[SplitSecond]

Ex swimwear model? Gym calendar model? Of course you are! LMAO!

 

[Frankfooter]

My favourite is the cassette player with church hymns on it.
Very 1980's penthouse forum.

 

[GameBoy27]

Ex swimwear model? Gym calendar model? Of course you are! LMAO!

And a surferboy. He's the one on the left.

 

[IM469]

Blonde, blue eyed, 6'3, 205lb. Ex swimwear model, sunshine boy (I was coerced by a hot photographer), gym calendar model. And yourself ?

Me, ??? Well, Blonde, hazel eyed, 6'6, 250 lb. body builder, professional athlete, gym promotional model, gym calendar model, (turned down swim suit modelling as predominately a gay gig), stunt double for the hulk in Marvel movies and there isn't a day when I don't have to empty girl's phone numbers that have been slipped into my personal belongings. Yeah, surferkid, I know how tough it is to be God's gift to women. Some days I wish I wasn't so damn handsome - it's a curse that many can't comprehend.

I was in an elevator in NYC dropping a few scripts back with my movie agent - I rejected the offers because they just want my image to draw the hot girls - not the deep roles I'm looking for. I guess there are a lot of agents in the building because the elevator opened - in came Emily Ratajkowski (Blurred Lines) and Ariana Grande. Both were wearing tight outfits and they looked hot. We had a little conversation when Emily popped the question about visiting her hotel room. Ariana yelled out 'I want him' and a wrestling match broke out. I hit the 'Stop' button so that we could cool the situation before we reached our floor. The wrestling slowed down and was replaced by embraces followed with full mouth kissing. They giggled and then in unison whispered 'we both want you'.

I would tell you what happened next but my alarm woke me up. Not to worry - I'm sure tomorrow I will conclude the adventure but in the interim, let's read a little more about surferkid's continuing saga ....

 

[GameBoy27]

Me, ??? Well, Blonde, hazel eyed, 6'6, 250 lb. body builder, professional athlete, gym promotional model, gym calendar model, (turned down swim suit modelling as predominately a gay gig), stunt double for the hulk in Marvel movies and there isn't a day when I don't have to empty girl's phone numbers that have been slipped into my personal belongings. Yeah, surferkid, I know how tough it is to be God's gift to women. Some days I wish I wasn't so damn handsome - it's a curse that many can't comprehend.

I was in an elevator in NYC dropping a few scripts back with my movie agent - I rejected the offers because they just want my image to draw the hot girls - not the deep roles I'm looking for. I guess there are a lot of agents in the building because the elevator opened - in came Emily Ratajkowski (Blurred Lines) and Ariana Grande. Both were wearing tight outfits and they looked hot. We had a little conversation when Emily popped the question about visiting her hotel room. Ariana yelled out 'I want him' and a wrestling match broke out. I hit the 'Stop' button so that we could cool the situation before we reached our floor. The wrestling slowed down and was replaced by embraces followed with full mouth kissing. They giggled and then in unison whispered 'we both want you'.

I would tell you what happened next but my alarm woke me up. Not to worry - I'm sure tomorrow I will conclude the adventure but in the interim, let's read a little more about surferkid's continuing saga ....

Awesome! ^^^

 

[gcostanza]

Me, ??? Well, Blonde, hazel eyed, 6'6, 250 lb. body builder, professional athlete, gym promotional model, gym calendar model, (turned down swim suit modelling as predominately a gay gig), stunt double for the hulk in Marvel movies and there isn't a day when I don't have to empty girl's phone numbers that have been slipped into my personal belongings. Yeah, surferkid, I know how tough it is to be God's gift to women. Some days I wish I wasn't so damn handsome - it's a curse that many can't comprehend.

I was in an elevator in NYC dropping a few scripts back with my movie agent - I rejected the offers because they just want my image to draw the hot girls - not the deep roles I'm looking for. I guess there are a lot of agents in the building because the elevator opened - in came Emily Ratajkowski (Blurred Lines) and Ariana Grande. Both were wearing tight outfits and they looked hot. We had a little conversation when Emily popped the question about visiting her hotel room. Ariana yelled out 'I want him' and a wrestling match broke out. I hit the 'Stop' button so that we could cool the situation before we reached our floor. The wrestling slowed down and was replaced by embraces followed with full mouth kissing. They giggled and then in unison whispered 'we both want you'.

I would tell you what happened next but my alarm woke me up. Not to worry - I'm sure tomorrow I will conclude the adventure but in the interim, let's read a little more about surferkid's continuing saga ....

 

[Kirby2006]

Cassette player...........because it's 1975

 

[surferboy]

And a surferboy. He's the one on the left.

Wow I only wish I was hung like him lol Scrolling for dick pics you gotta find a new hobby

Me, ??? Well, Blonde, hazel eyed, 6'6, 250 lb. body builder, professional athlete, gym promotional model, gym calendar model, (turned down swim suit modelling as predominately a gay gig)

Awh don't be jealous 4'6.9 i'm sure your a fit good looking ladies man hmm hmm. I did forget to mention semi pro athlete but mom always said women like a humble man. Love to see your gym photos I imagine their killer lol. Who would of thought at 35+ with almost 2000 members they'd still ask to be one of the six males in the calendar, fack it must just be a cruel joke... As for swim suit modelling getting to hang out with Booke Burke & a bevy of other hotties, tons of swag & get paid ya it was tough gig lol

I was in an elevator in NYC dropping a few scripts back with my movie agent - I rejected the offers because they just want my image to draw the hot girls - not the deep roles I'm looking for. I guess there are a lot of agents in the building because the elevator opened - in came Emily Ratajkowski (Blurred Lines) and Ariana Grande. Both were wearing tight outfits and they looked hot. We had a little conversation when Emily popped the question about visiting her hotel room. Ariana yelled out 'I want him' and a wrestling match broke out. I hit the 'Stop' button so that we could cool the situation before we reached our floor. The wrestling slowed down and was replaced by embraces followed with full mouth kissing. They giggled and then in unison whispered 'we both want you'.

I would tell you what happened next but my alarm woke me up. Not to worry - I'm sure tomorrow I will conclude the adventure but in the interim, let's read a little more about surferkid's continuing saga ....

And Ariana & Emily. Emily for sure, Ariana prolly not. Not my type & at 5'0 she's a little below my cut off. But hypothetically if myself, you, Emily & Ariana were in the elevator i'd be willing to bet they'd be paying more attention to me than you bud...

Cassette player...........because it's 1975

Hey if the church would let guys bend their hotties over the sunday school desk attendance & collection would sky rocket & they could buy some decent audio equipment. The shit in there looks like it hasn't been touched since 1982. I'd gladly drop a hun anytime for that experience!

 

[Butler1000]

Cripes looks like we got ourselves a Gorilla Joe wannabe here.

Dude if you seriously think we aren't going to mock you for being a delusion al braggart then you obviously don't understand humanity.

You are a silly man, somewhere in a room with a computer, a bookshelf filled with the Gor novels, and still harboring feelings of inadequacy from high school.

Being a geek is ok now. Respected in fact. You don't need to fake it on the Internet.

 

[james t kirk]

The greekster