FRO...Family Responsibility services of Ontario

Vixens

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Here is a real world example. Nothing exaggerated, unlike other people on here. I was in court and saw this. It wasn't my case.

Mom and dad had separated and had a written custody arrangement. Mom books a two week trip to see her parents in another country with the child during the father's two week period with the child. (The dates for those two weeks were set out in the custody agreement as being the father's time.) She said she assumed he would take his two weeks some other time. He said he couldn't take his two weeks some other time because he had already booked those two weeks off with his employer and his employer was refusing to allow him to switch them. The woman said she had bought non-refundable tickets.

The issue for the court, as always, is how does it rule in favour of the woman. It was a bit difficult because the woman clearly violated the custody agreement but it was nothing that the court couldn't handle:


Judge (screaming at the man as always): Don't you realize it is in the best interests of the child to have a relationship with her grandparents? Of course, the child can go on the trip.

You could see how appalled the judge was that a man would dare not do whatever the mother wanted.

Does this affect child support? Of course not. And when that man becomes completely numb to all this, he will be called a deadbeat dad.

A man who doesn't pay support = deadbeat dad.
A woman who doesn't pay support = mom.

For those thinking of having kids (or dating single mothers): Don't think it won't happen to you.
You had me sympathetic right up until the bold section. Moms being an asshole but the judge is not incorrect that the kids deserve a relationship with their grandparents. Why would it affect child support? We're talking about 2 weeks here, there are still 50 left in the year...
Look. I get that some parents are assholes. Both moms and dads. Your problem is that you're resentful that you have to give mom money and that it appears that the system is biased. If you would look at it from a less self serving point of view, it would make more sense. If you truly believe it's unfair, petition the court for a shared access agreement. Have your kids 40, 50, 60% of the time and then your support obligations will change.

Steph
 

grooverider

Always with my Member
Aug 23, 2001
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Always in the Groove...
Here is Dave Foley's experience with the FRO. At the time of the interview, he still couldn't come back to Canada. He would get put in jail to make payments based on what he was making when he was on News Radio, even though that show has been cancelled.

He says the if he comes back, he would be put in jail for 30 days, then go in front of a judge, asked if he could pay the money and if not, put in jail for another 30 days, rinse and repeat.

The kicker is that if he was still with his wife, the kids wouldn't be have the money that he was making while on News Radio. :frusty:

The problem I see is that, the FRO won't adjust payments based on loss of income.

Full disclosure: I haven't been married and have only seen divorce though other people (friends, coworkers, etc), but as a guy it seems like a massive financial loss.

This link is from his interview on the Rogan podcast about his divorce.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SaC-2lj6HNg
 
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rgkv

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Nov 14, 2005
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All these people pissed off they have to pay support.... try liking it when you have NO KIDS...:confused:
 

mandrill

Well-known member
Aug 23, 2001
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Here is a real world example. Nothing exaggerated, unlike other people on here. I was in court and saw this. It wasn't my case.

Mom and dad had separated and had a written custody arrangement. Mom books a two week trip to see her parents in another country with the child during the father's two week period with the child. (The dates for those two weeks were set out in the custody agreement as being the father's time.) She said she assumed he would take his two weeks some other time. He said he couldn't take his two weeks some other time because he had already booked those two weeks off with his employer and his employer was refusing to allow him to switch them. The woman said she had bought non-refundable tickets.

The issue for the court, as always, is how does it rule in favour of the woman. It was a bit difficult because the woman clearly violated the custody agreement but it was nothing that the court couldn't handle:

Judge (screaming at the man as always): Don't you realize it is in the best interests of the child to have a relationship with her grandparents? Of course, the child can go on the trip.

You could see how appalled the judge was that a man would dare not do whatever the mother wanted.

Does this affect child support? Of course not. And when that man becomes completely numb to all this, he will be called a deadbeat dad.

A man who doesn't pay support = deadbeat dad.
A woman who doesn't pay support = mom.

For those thinking of having kids (or dating single mothers): Don't think it won't happen to you.
Listen: When I gave you my example several posts ago, you misinterpreted the fact situation almost entirely and twisted the results to fit in with your own pre existing hate agenda.

Family court cases can become very complicated and the dynamic very difficult to sort out. I am going to take a wild guess and suggest that the experienced and capable Family Court judge (who was appointed due to his reputation and qualifications for the job) got the call right and you misunderstood what was happening.
 

grooverider

Always with my Member
Aug 23, 2001
627
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Always in the Groove...
You had me sympathetic right up until the bold section. Moms being an asshole but the judge is not incorrect that the kids deserve a relationship with their grandparents. Why would it affect child support? We're talking about 2 weeks here, there are still 50 left in the year...
Look. I get that some parents are assholes. Both moms and dads. Your problem is that you're resentful that you have to give mom money and that it appears that the system is biased. If you would look at it from a less self serving point of view, it would make more sense. If you truly believe it's unfair, petition the court for a shared access agreement. Have your kids 40, 50, 60% of the time and then your support obligations will change.

Steph
Are you saying that the relationship with the grandparents overrides the relationship with the father? No chance, ever.
 
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mandrill

Well-known member
Aug 23, 2001
75,898
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Here is Dave Foley's experience with the FRO. At the time of the interview, he still couldn't come back to Canada. He would get put in jail to make payments based on what he was making when he was on News Radio, even though that show has been cancelled.

He says the if he comes back, he would be put in jail for 30 days, then go in front of a judge, asked if he could pay the money and if not, put in jail for another 30 days, rinse and repeat.

The kicker is that if he was still with his wife, the kids wouldn't be have the money that he was making while on News Radio.

The problem I see is that, the FRO won't adjust payments based on loss of income, but may adjust if the income increases.

Full disclosure: I haven't been married and have only seen divorce though other people (friends, coworkers, etc), but as a guy it seems like a massive financial loss.

This link is from his interview on the Rogan podcast about his divorce.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SaC-2lj6HNg
First of all, FRO does not adjust. FRO merely enforces what the judge decides.

The judge will adjust up and / or down depending on whether the payor's income increased or decreased. Judges do it all the time. It's Family Court 101, 1st day of class level stuff.

As a matter of fact, I spent yesterday in - you guessed it - Family Court and we adjusted a guy's child support for the last 4 years, year by year and calculated the net balance. In two of those 4 years, he earned a lot MORE than the original order. In two of the 4 years, he earned a little LESS. So..... in two of the 4 years, he was retroactively calculated for a lot MORE child support. And in 2 of the 4 years, he was recalculated for a little LESS child support.

In the end, he owed about $1,500 net and the judge let him pay it off in little bits over the next year.

This is simple stuff. It happens 100 times a day in Family Court. And the judges are not biased against guys. I know this. It's what I do 5 days a week.

Now, I don't what the issue is with Rogan. Normally, judges get the calls correct. Occasionally, they screw up. Then, you can appeal the case. Occasionally, the Court of Appeal also gets the call wrong. But it happens rarely. The judges are appointed because they are competent and respected, not because there is a secret vendetta against men. I mean, why would there be??!!

Family Court cases can be VERY complicated. For instance, if a judge thinks a dude DELIBERATELY fucked up at work to lose his job and deprive his kids of child support, he doesn't get a break for reduced income. There are other instances where a payor disqualifies himself from getting a break as well.
 

mandrill

Well-known member
Aug 23, 2001
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Are you saying that the relationship with the grandparents overrides the relationship with the father? No chance, ever.
Freedom likely misunderstood and misinterpreted what the judge said and did. The cases can be very difficult to follow unless you do this type of work day and day out and know what the dialogue is about. And Freedom likes to read and twist stuff to make it fit in with his agenda. I don't think it's worth getting into a debate about this, because you are likely not getting an accurate account.
 

grooverider

Always with my Member
Aug 23, 2001
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Always in the Groove...
Thanks for the clarification, admittedly, the source I used was biased.

Since you said that the judge is the only one who can decide a payment, you are implying that Foley was misinformed or lying about his wife not being willing take a difference settlement.

Good to know.
 

Vixens

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Are you saying that the relationship with the grandparents overrides the relationship with the father? No chance, ever.
Of course not! I said that mom was being an asshole and that the judge approached it from the perspective of the kids.

Steph
 

freedom3

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Mar 7, 2004
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To clarify, I do not have kids and have never been divorced or separated. And I had a perfect understanding of what was happening that day to that poor guy in court. It wasn't my case, but everyone in the courtroom understood how his two weeks with his daughter were being so casually taken from him. And if he had tried to take the mother's two weeks from her? Do you think the judge would have condoned that?
 

Vixens

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To clarify, I do not have kids and have never been divorced or separated. And I had a perfect understanding of what was happening that day to that poor guy in court. It wasn't my case, but everyone in the courtroom understood how his two weeks with his daughter were being so casually taken from him. And if he had tried to take the mother's two weeks from her? Do you think the judge would have condoned that?

If the situation was reversed I do. Maybe I'm just being idealistic but I believe that the system is child focused as it should be. It may come across as biased and mom focused but the reality is that kids reside with mom more often. It's not a conspiracy against men, it just is what it is.

Steph
 

mandrill

Well-known member
Aug 23, 2001
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Thanks for the clarification, admittedly, the source I used was biased.

Since you said that the judge is the only one who can decide a payment, you are implying that Foley was misinformed or lying about his wife not being willing take a difference settlement.

Good to know.
I listened to 4 minutes of his audio - essentially "the boys" talking about crazy bitch women. And another 16 minutes is well beyond my patience.

If you tell me exactly what Foley said and about when in the video, I can give you a response.
 

Gentlescorp

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Oct 23, 2012
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There must be a "catch" somewhere. If his situation was that straightforward and sympathetic, neither FRO nor the judge would be out to get him.

Have him show you the judge's "endorsements". These are photocopies of the judge's notes, comments and orders on his case. This will illustrate the judge's reactions to his presentation.
I was with my friend till midnight and I have to drive him to court tomorrow with his car. He said they might take him straight to jail from the court and he wants me to take his car to his brother's house after dropping him off. The endorsement he showed me read " There is a final default order dated April 2nd, 2013. There is no need to repeat that precise(may be process. hard to read), and the Director is at liberty to fashion a motion for a warrant of committal. Matter to return Sept 24th, 2015."

On his court documents, FRO was asking for 60 days jail term. Are they really going to lock him up for 60 days or he might come out early as other criminal cases? I feel really bad for the guy but there is nothing much I can do.
 
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mandrill

Well-known member
Aug 23, 2001
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I was with my friend till midnight and I have to drive him to court tomorrow with his car. He said they might take him straight to jail from the court and he wants me to take his car to his brother's house after dropping him off. The endorsement he showed me read " There is a final default order dated April 2nd, 2013. There is no need to repeat that precise, and the Director is at liberty to fashion a motion for a warrant of committal. Matter to return Sept 24th, 2015."

On his court documents, FRO was asking for 60 days jail term. Are they really going to lock him up for 60 days or he might come out early as other criminal cases? I feel really bad for the guy but there is nothing much I can do.
Sounds like he's going for 60. Unlike criminal proceedings, there is no time off for good behavior and he does every day. Who is the judge?
 

Gentlescorp

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Oct 23, 2012
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Sounds like he's going for 60. Unlike criminal proceedings, there is no time off for good behavior and he does every day. Who is the judge?
Aw..that sucks. He said he has different judges every time he goes. Most time lady judges. Its a sad case. He will lose his job and his wife and his daughter will get 1000 less a month. Nobody wins here. I called his wife and tried to talk to her to help him out of the situation. Oh Boy..she yelled back and hung up the phone. Her mom has full sympathy for him and she got into big trouble siding with him. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.
 

mandrill

Well-known member
Aug 23, 2001
75,898
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Aw..that sucks. He said he has different judges every time he goes. Most time lady judges. Its a sad case. He will lose his job and his wife and his daughter will get 1000 less a month. Nobody wins here. I called his wife and tried to talk to her to help him out of the situation. Oh Boy..she yelled back and hung up the phone. Her mom has full sympathy for him and she got into big trouble siding with him. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.
What I said (and also the FRO guy) above.... You don't really know everything that might have happened in the case. You weren't there for those court appearances.

It is pretty common that a litigant will lie like a mother fucker to get sympathy from his / her friends. Few people are entirely honest, especially about something as personal and ego-related as going to court.

The helpful friend who shows up to advocate for a litigant is despised by lawyers as the lowest form of life in the system. We call them "cheerleaders". Nice people, but they never know what's really gone on. Their expectations are crazy optimistic because they have no idea about the case and the litigant has misled them. And they generally harass and badger the lawyer and interfere with his / her conduct of the case because they have the impression that the lawyer is greedy, cowardly, corrupt, ineffective and incompetent from the litigant.

Please try not to be that guy. You will not help anyone, including your buddy. And everyone is going to really hate you.
 

mandrill

Well-known member
Aug 23, 2001
75,898
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Aw..that sucks. He said he has different judges every time he goes. Most time lady judges. Its a sad case. He will lose his job and his wife and his daughter will get 1000 less a month. Nobody wins here. I called his wife and tried to talk to her to help him out of the situation. Oh Boy..she yelled back and hung up the phone. Her mom has full sympathy for him and she got into big trouble siding with him. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.
You gotta stop the gender politics. It's not about lady judges or guy judges. It's the law. If your friend has broken it, ALL judges will jug his ass. It's their job.

There is absolutely NO difference between how a guy judge and a lady judge will react to your friend.
 

Gentlescorp

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Oct 23, 2012
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You gotta stop the gender politics. It's not about lady judges or guy judges. It's the law. If your friend has broken it, ALL judges will jug his ass. It's their job.

There is absolutely NO difference between how a guy judge and a lady judge will react to your friend.
Thanks oagre for all the info. It was very educational. I gave my buddy a big hug b4 he walks towards the court. I see clearly now how the system works here. B4 this thread I see FRO as a collection agency and mean hearted people. Now I see them differently. Same with the judges. Donno about some lawyers tho..I mean some.. lol

Btw..My sister just opened up a hotel in Singapore and asking me to spend the winter there working for her a few months. Can I get into trouble if I spend my winter in Singapore working for my sister where they cannot garnish me. Do I have to inform them what I will be doing there and what my income is or it is better to pay them in advance ?
 
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