Woman friend zoned me. anyway to still be her lover?

[Sophia Sinclair]

If you can show her that other women are interested in you that can help to raise your value. As that can show you are in high demand and creates an element of challenge to you. So it helps when you are with her to look at your phone and be like "Sheila keeps on texting me...".

But also agree with a bit of a timeout to get your head in the right place where you are more detached from the outcome.

Personally I never understood this concept.

If I like a guy, I like him, if I don't, I don't. I don't need to see that other ladies are interested in him in order to be/become interested in him. I can only speak for myself, but if I tell a guy we're just friends, it means we're friends and nothing more. Then again, I don't play juvenile games, nor do I believe in messing around with other people's emotions. There are however people out there who will string someone along, etc.

The only advice I'm going to give is to simply be yourself. That way you'll know that if she likes you, she likes you for who you are and not because of all your strategizing to get her.

 

[SexB]

Personally I never understood this concept.

If I like a guy, I like him, if I don't, I don't. I don't need to see that other ladies are interested in him in order to be/become interested in him. I can only speak for myself, but if I tell a guy we're just friends, it means we're friends and nothing more. Then again, I don't play juvenile games, nor do I believe in messing around with other people's emotions. There are however people out there who will string someone along, etc.

The only advice I'm going to give is to simply be yourself. That way you'll know that if she likes you, she likes you for who you are and not because of all your strategizing to get her.

That's my feeling on "the friend zone".

As I mentioned in a couple different posts, I personally think it's incredibly childish and guys should realize how immature it is by the time they hit their mid-20's.

I also think that any woman who continues to string guys along with the possibility of friendship developing into something more so they can get something from them need to grow up and the guys they're doing it to need to open their eyes and realize they're being manipulated.

 

[fuji]

Thanks for everyone's reply but I like the advice from above. Anyway, went into work today and had a brief chat with her and the conversation went well. Later on at break times I felt a tension between us. I also caught her staring at me, not sure if it was a stare of interest or if she was wondering what I was going to do next though. We usually don't sit together as she usually spends it on the phone or outside smoking. Later on towards the end of work, she seemed to totally avoid me but she was busy. Felt sorta cold. She also didn't return my last text to her from the weekend, says she had a phone problem when I asked her about it, but she seemed genuine in her reply.

Anyway, anyone else has any suggestions? Any advice from the ladies on here? She seemed so into me when we first met, but not so much now. I miss the attention.

Here is what makes it hard:

1. You have to sexualize it WITHOUT being creepy, which means, without expectations, without pressure

2. You have to be willing to let the friendship go, at least, risk losing the friendship

You can't be passive aggressive, you can't hint, you can't read tea leaves. What you do has to be bold and confident but at the same time not pressure her. You aren't making a move, you are changing the dynamic. Making a move can only come later.

And a hard reality: if you are in friend zone because she isn't remotely attracted to you, there is no dynamic you can change to that will fix that. You can only get to a dating dynamic if she sees you as datable.

Getting out of friend zone is only possible I'd you got friend zoned because you somehow signaled (perhaps unintentionally) that you aren't interested in her, or she was unavailable when you met.

If you got friend zoned because she thinks you are completely not her type then the only other zone is no contact.

 

[AdamH]

Seriously.. When a woman tells you that she doesn't want to "ruin your friendship", it's just her fucked up way of telling you she's not attracted to you..

Can you think of an attractive female friend you WOULDN'T fuck if the opportunity arose?? I'm not talking about the women you wouldn't fuck because it'd destroy you at work, or your wife would find out, or she's married to your friend (or whatever).. I'm talking about single hot friends.. NO! Of course not.. If you find somebody attractive, then you'll fuck them if the opportunity arises.. Same thing is true for women.. Being "friends" isn't a good enough reason for either sex to NOT fuck somebody.. Them being ugly as shit is..

 

[Bud Plug]

I agree with the idea that you can manipulate a woman into wanting to have sex with you. I agree with some of the specific strategies that have been suggested (and disagree with some of the others).

However, the question no one seems to be asking is, why would you want to succeed this way? You, more than anyone, will know that she is only sleeping with you because of your manipulation. That will lower your estimation of her in your eyes. It will also preclude any satisfaction/happiness that comes from the idea that another person really is in to you/finds you sexy/loves you.

Seems like a lot of work to have sex on an artificial basis. If that's what you want, why not save yourself a lot of time and money and hire an SP, or 10? That is by far the easiest and cheapest way to have sex with attractive women.

If you're looking for a relationship, you can't build a solid structure on a foundation of sand.

People are so different from each other, yet they think they should find their perfect mate after hanging out for a few hours at a bar!

The best advice is to be patient, and take what life brings you in the meantime. If you are out doing what you like to do, chances are you will meet people who enjoy the same things and maybe have a similar outlook on a variety of issues.

All this advice about picking up women is like books on fad diets. Artificial means bring artificial ends. They don't last.

The only sensible advice that the OP should have been given is that if a woman only wants to be your friend you shouldn't invest any more of your time/assistance in her than you would any casual male friend. In other words, save your full commitment for someone who wants to be fully committed to you.

 

[Titalian]

You can't be passive aggressive, you can't hint, you can't read tea leaves. What you do has to be bold and confident but at the same time not pressure her. You aren't making a move, you are changing the dynamic. Making a move can only come later.

I like this statement, its the way men should be when trying to change the dynamics. And if that don't work move on and end the contact.

 

[destillat]

Who cares... if all you want to do it nail her, lie all you want to make it happen, then move on.
Women lie to us all the time.

 

[Titalian]

Who cares... if all you want to do it nail her, lie all you want to make it happen, then move on.
Women lie to us all the time.

On the contrary, I've met some pretty genuine women in my lifetime, and even a few in this business

 

[destillat]

On the contrary, I've met some pretty genuine women in my lifetime, and even a few in this business

And I couldn't be happier for you... well, I could, but you get the point.
Women lie to men, that isn't a new piece of information.

 

[crocket]

Again thanks for all the replies. Anyway today she worked in my dept. Not together but separate. Every time I looked at her, she was looking back at me. Happened a couple dozen times. We even made eye contact many times too. Guess she must think I am hot or something. No way she would always be looking at me if she didn't like how I look. Anyway, difficult to talk to her during break since she is always on the phone. She says she is talking to her ex. but when I ask her if she plans on getting back with him, she says absolutely not. So now why is she talking to him a lot if she has no plans on taking him back? You think she wants to cheat on her ex with me to get back at him?

 

[icespot]

Again thanks for all the replies. Anyway today she worked in my dept. Not together but separate. Every time I looked at her, she was looking back at me. Happened a couple dozen times. We even made eye contact many times too. Guess she must think I am hot or something. No way she would always be looking at me if she didn't like how I look. Anyway, difficult to talk to her during break since she is always on the phone. She says she is talking to her ex. but when I ask her if she plans on getting back with him, she says absolutely not. So now why is she talking to him a lot if she has no plans on taking him back? You think she wants to cheat on her ex with me to get back at him?

If she was interested in you my man she wouldn't be talking on her phone. Also she would never havd used the word we are friends. I have bed women I thought were only interested in being friends, and they were always up for anything. When you tell them their is something I wanted to asm you. You can see them start to blush and move closer to you.

The lady in question is not intrested and if by chance something does happen you are going to get hurt.

Move a long and go after other women. Remember that practice makes perfect.

 

[fuji]

Making eye contact is something you do for twenty minutes, max. After that it's shy.

Try complimenting her looks and tell her that her ex must be an idiot, any guy would love to be with her. Say it while you are walking out the door at the end of your shift so it doesn't come across as a pick up line, since you are leaving.

Do something like that max two times and throw in some stories about interesting stuff you are doing outside work.

Then take a chance and ask her out, not on a traditional date, come up with something you are doing anyway and ask her to come along.

She will give you a very clear signal at this point, it will either be yes, a maybe ( I would love to but not today) or a no. If you get the maybe try one more time, if you get the no, or two maybes in a row, she isn't interested. Try someone else and leave her be.

 

[thirdcup]

I feel your pain. I've had my hopes dashed as well.
For instance, I was never breast fed. My mother said she only liked me as a friend.

- Dangerfield.

.... Cue the rimshot.

 

[Frosty]

Crocket, you sound like a rapist.

 

[SplitSecond]

In all seriousness... there are so many beautiful women in Toronto. Just move onto the next one or pay for play!

I agree with this. You'll eventually get over being rejected and there are other women out there that will be perfect for you.
I've been in the same situation as you, don't waste time trying to have sex with her, be her friend and move on.

 

[Cobra Enorme]

so easy. start banging her friends and she'll be begging for your cobra in no time

 

[waynward]

so easy. start banging her friends and she'll be begging for your cobra in no time

WE HAVE A WINNER!

 

[MissCroft]

This may not work well because you work together. Otherwise, just grab her and kiss her. If she kisses back, great. If she slaps you, not so great. But then you have your answer.



Why do men make things so difficult?

 

[MissCroft]

Yeah because losing your job over a sexual harassment charge is just "not so great'

Sorry, my post was meant to be a little in jest but I guess it didn't work well. Maybe I'm just one of those women who doesn't overreact about stuff like that.

 

[Stoo]

Tell her true friends swallow. That should bring it to a head, one way or the other.