So, do you all remember that "Everybody Loves Raymond" episode when Ray and Debra fall out of bed during sex and Ray hurts his wrist? He brags to his friends about his "sex injury" and, of course, hilarity ensues.
Well, it happened to me. And it's cramping my style today.
On Monday I saw a girl at the friendly, neighbourhood massage parlour. It was a little rougher than I'm used to, she's a very athletic and strong girl, and she handled my delicate parts a little more aggressively than she should have I guess. Now, I had no complaint at the time, and a little rougher worked just fine for me. I was very happy with the session.
Monday night as I was peeing before going to bed I noticed a little purple mark at the base of my penis. Hmm. I went to bed and slept without worrying about it. Then, when I woke up in the morning and looked down I was horrified at what I saw.
A red, purple and blue penis. Just at the base, but it's still horrible! Shit! A terrible bruise kind of in the shape of the MPA's thumb. Talk about an unwanted souvenir...
I knew there was no hiding this from my wife unless it clears up before she sees me naked. Fortunately we had had sex on Sunday night--yes, I would not have normally gone to the massage parlour the next day, but Monday was my birthday and I wanted my free door fee. So, although it wasn't rough with my wife when we had sex I told her well, I guess I bent it funny or something, because look at this! She was suitably shocked, and I don't think suspects that it wasn't her that did it.
Today, I would probably go and see my regular SP. Except my penis looks like a grape lollipop. Sigh. She knows me, and knows that it doesn't normally look like that, but still... I guess the smart thing to do would be to just keep it in my pants and let it heal. Maybe Friday? Jeez...
Well, it happened to me. And it's cramping my style today.
On Monday I saw a girl at the friendly, neighbourhood massage parlour. It was a little rougher than I'm used to, she's a very athletic and strong girl, and she handled my delicate parts a little more aggressively than she should have I guess. Now, I had no complaint at the time, and a little rougher worked just fine for me. I was very happy with the session.
Monday night as I was peeing before going to bed I noticed a little purple mark at the base of my penis. Hmm. I went to bed and slept without worrying about it. Then, when I woke up in the morning and looked down I was horrified at what I saw.
A red, purple and blue penis. Just at the base, but it's still horrible! Shit! A terrible bruise kind of in the shape of the MPA's thumb. Talk about an unwanted souvenir...
I knew there was no hiding this from my wife unless it clears up before she sees me naked. Fortunately we had had sex on Sunday night--yes, I would not have normally gone to the massage parlour the next day, but Monday was my birthday and I wanted my free door fee. So, although it wasn't rough with my wife when we had sex I told her well, I guess I bent it funny or something, because look at this! She was suitably shocked, and I don't think suspects that it wasn't her that did it.
Today, I would probably go and see my regular SP. Except my penis looks like a grape lollipop. Sigh. She knows me, and knows that it doesn't normally look like that, but still... I guess the smart thing to do would be to just keep it in my pants and let it heal. Maybe Friday? Jeez...