The ten solitudes of Toronto dating

[fuji]

I would think your typical female would see a single person who sees prostitutes not as a moral slime but as a looser, as in, look at that looser, he has to pay for sex.

So when a woman turns down a guy who when single visits prostitutes, it is not a moral judgement and thus your point is wrong.

I think there is a vanishingly small difference between "look at that loser" and "moral judgement".

That you would assume it is, and based on what you have said above, you seem to have some real negative thoughts on the whole prostitution game ethically speaking

No, I don't. I am commenting on the view society at large takes. My own view is radically different.

Even if your typical female thought prostitution was morally objectionable, that does not make it so.

Absolutely, but we were discussing what was more acceptable in the mainstream of society. What is philosophically right or wrong can be quite different from that. Specifically this whole line of argument is in response to this: It is certainly debatable that Adultery is "more mainstream" than engaging an SP, which was just one sub-point on whether prostitution was more or less morally acceptable. Being more mainstream is one way to look at it, you are right there are others.

Cheating on a wife is breaking your vows.

Get over it.

Using deception to get laid in the manner in which you do makes a mockery of informed consent.

According to you anyone who commits adultery and then goes home and has sex with their spouse is committing rape. That is an absurd and irrational view you are taking there.

And are you really defending hypocrisy. Seriously.

Yes. Seriously. In the realm of sexual behavior we are all inherently hypocritical. Some of us accept that as human nature, and embrace being human. Others are presumably inferior and still grappling--unsuccessfully perhaps--with their humanity, in a sort of self-denial.

 

[Nubby]

Is prostitution morally bad. No. End of story, my conscious is clear, let the judging begin.

That's intellectually dishonest. Let's face it, there is no clear answer to that question. I don't think it's wrong, but is it exploitive, dangerous? Sure it is. I don't believe it to be immoral but I can at least understand why some feel that way.

 

[Nubby]

According to you anyone who commits adultery and then goes home and has sex with their spouse is committing rape. That is an absurd and irrational view you are taking there.

It's not rape, but condoms are not 100% effective (especially when it comes to infections which are transmitted skin-to-skin like herpes and HPV) and every time you cheat you risk bringing that home to your wife. It's one thing for you to know the risks and it's something else entirely to inflict that upon your wife without her consenting to it. And you have no right to do that, morally or a legally. I agree with you on some fronts, but being dismissive about this doesn't mean you aren't completely wrong.

 

[blackrock13]

Good for you. Want a candy?

What, is this a sticks and stones thing? I haven't projected a single thing. You tell everyone what an accomplished liar and cheat you are, and you continually inform the board how central to your life are your superbly organized and orchestrated deception practices, indeed you brag about them and wear them as a badge of honor. Psychology 101 is all one needs to see you are a narcissist and most likely a psychopath. You fit perfectly, by your own characterizations. The only thing going unaccepted here is that you ultimately don't like someone calling a spade a spade. You don't mind copping to sexual hypocrisy because you pride yourself on it (psychopaths and sociopaths alike exhibit that kind of dissociative disorder), and ditto for lying and other deceptions, but you can't handle someone else bundling it all into a different character package than you think it bundles into. So you imply I'm 'limited', which is your way of being a cry baby that I don't accede to your own overall self-characterization.

Get over it.

Well, well, well, I'm not sure it's ever been said better.

 

[fuji]

Now you don't really believe that, because like a psychopath

Plainly you're losing it.

On most measures of social acceptability, being a pathological liar counts against you

Except that I'm not a "pathological liar", and you have no basis for saying that I am. You think that because I mislead over sexual issues, that I would mislead generally. You're wrong.

we evaluate psychopaths a bit differently.

More evidence that you've lost it. You've descended into nasty insult, leaving rational debate behind.

I haven't projected a single thing.

Sure you have. You've made the unwarranted assumption that because I cheated that I'm somehow dishonest in all of my dealings. So you have decided that someone who cheats must be a "psychopath" and a "pathological liar" and who knows what else--but you have no justification for those claims.

I have been straight forward about what I do, you really have no cause to spin off into the nasty insults and speculations about what else I do. You're flat out incapable of accepting the sexual cheating for reasons of your own limitations, and it's causing you to misrepresent and misperceive, to speculate wildly, and make all sorts of inane and unwarranted assumptions. It's just your own limited knee-jerk response.

You are a limited individual.

 

[fuji]

In other words, sw1tch, you cannot identify a single case where I've been dishonest outside of the realm of sexual cheating. Yet you assert that I'm a "pathological liar". You've lost it, and you are frothing at the mouth.

I note that you have no reasons for the things that you think.

 

[fuji]

Right, so I'm supposed to prove that I never lie outside of sexual cheating, by what? Giving you a complete account of my life all day long every day?

Wipe your chin, your froth is dripping.

 

[fuji]

That won't save you from being a definite narcissist and most likely a psychopath. But nice try attempting to shift the point of focus.

Wipe your mouth.

Meanwhile I'm still waiting for your evidence that I am a "pathological liar". That's quite the assertion for someone who is completely ignorant. Yes, I'm proud of my sexual cheating. But for you to assert that I am a "pathological liar", implying that I am fundamentally dishonest in all my dealings all the time with all people--well that's something you simply can't support. It's just froth and spittle coming from your mouth.

The reality is that I view you as an inferior in that you are unable to come to grips with human sexuality. It bugs you that I see things that way, so you've launched into an irrational tirade populated by unsubstantiated insults and ridiculous accusations, "narcissist", "psychopath", "pathological liar".

Really, wipe your mouth.

 

[fuji]

If a particular ethnicity is your thing, for fucks sake, just peruse lavalife or expand your social horizons. This ain't complicated.

Great, finally back on topic!

I think you missed up thread that I have noted these women for the most part don't turn up on lavalife/POF. I did say that in post #1. If they were on those sites there wouldn't be "10 solitudes". They're mostly mixing with others in their own immigrant community and unaware really of how to break out of that--but wanting to. From my personal experience I'd even say aching to.

 

[LancsLad]

Wipe your mouth.

Meanwhile I'm still waiting for your evidence that I am a "pathological liar". That's quite the assertion for someone who is completely ignorant. Yes, I'm proud of my sexual cheating. But for you to assert that I am a "pathological liar", implying that I am fundamentally dishonest in all my dealings all the time with all people--well that's something you simply can't support. It's just froth and spittle coming from your mouth.

The reality is that I view you as an inferior in that you are unable to come to grips with human sexuality. It bugs you that I see things that way, so you've launched into an irrational tirade populated by unsubstantiated insults and ridiculous accusations, "narcissist", "psychopath", "pathological liar".

Really, wipe your mouth.

I Love this thread.


I'm now convinced that Fuji is just the TERB handle for the one and only superior being that uses the earth name " The ALGORE"

When you read Fuji's postings that self righteous sense of infalible superiority just wells up to the surface. He can barely contain his magnificence, even if he does say so himself.

We are lucky to gave such a luminary grace us with his views, so lets all pause and thank the envirogods that their great leader has chosen us to bless with his wisdom.

We are not worthy..........


As you were.

.

 

[fuji]

We are lucky to gave such a luminary grace us with his views

You're welcome.

By the way, just an update -- the girl mentioned in post #1 who bought my dinner last Friday wants to cook for me this coming Saturday. Guess she is going all out. She also has fantastic tits and a slim athletic body.

I do need to find more of these women, they're great!

 

[larry]

i, for one, do think the ladies treated well, dined and orgasmed are happy and grateful. their own community isn't taking good care of them. the majority come from places where women are second class. to be put on a pedestal for a night or two isn't so bad. why do some deny an unknown woman a night of pleasure?

 

[fuji]

You are a narcissist and most likely a psychopath.

No, I am not, and I direct you to the terb posting guidelines with respect to your ongoing, childish, idiotic, baseless and unsubstantiated personal attacks. Go back to the school yard and play with the kiddies, or grow up and demonstrate a little more maturity.

As for evidence of your serial lying, which is rightfully deemed pathological, one need look no further than your 20,000 odd posts.

No, what you will find in my posts is lots of evidence that I cheat. What you will not find anywhere is any evidence that I ever lie for any other purpose. You need to retract your wrong and unsubstantiated claim.

Again, I put it out there:

You can't stand that I cheat, and that I am openly hypocritical in the area of sexual cheating. You wrongly conclude from that that I must therefore do other things you dislike. You make that claim without any basis, just because of your own limitations in your ability to conceive of the issue.

We are all inherently hypocritical when it comes to sex. I'm simply more honest about it than you are. I live a fuller, better life than you do as a result of my greater appreciation for human nature.

 

[GPIDEAL]

You're welcome.

By the way, just an update -- the girl mentioned in post #1 who bought my dinner last Friday wants to cook for me this coming Saturday. Guess she is going all out. She also has fantastic tits and a slim athletic body.

I do need to find more of these women, they're great!

Fuji, she sounds like a keeper. Why do you need more?

 

[fuji]

Sw1tch, you fail at maturity. There was nothing rational or substantial in your post worth responding to. It was another frothing-at-the-mouth spew of childish insults.

 

[GPIDEAL]

No. I haven't had much luck on CL for this. Chance meeting in a public place, with an element that put me into the "trusted" category as I was able to be of some help that day.

Good for making your move when the time was ripe.

 

[fuji]

Fuji, she sounds like a keeper. Why do you need more?

I like to fill my whole week!

 

[fuji]

You're right, fuji, there's not that much substantial about you.

The childishness continues... your posts say more about you than about me at this point.

Q.E.D.

 

[fuji]

Good for making your move when the time was ripe.

Yeah. Both of the ones I've met that fit into this immigrant-desperately-seeking-local were chance. I did not find them in the usual places you go to find women, but rather chance encounters. Actually three... the third wasn't pretty enough so I moved on. In all three cases I became very aware that they were really, really looking for a local boyfriend and essentially latched onto me as the first "good guy" that came along that wasn't from their own immigrant community.

I figure there are a lot more of them out there. They seem to be isolated into their own community, surrounded with friends from their own background, often living in houses or apartments with several other people from their country. They want to meet local guys, but their social world only extends to include others from their own background.

Sure they could randomly walk into a bar full of strangers and pick up any guy, but we all know most women just don't do that. They want to date a guy who has been somehow "screened" by their friends, or some dating process, or whatever.

 

[rld]

That's touching fuji. But I doubt you reflect deeply on anything.

I take it a big bowl of lies is being served for appetizer?

And it occurs to me why you're such a cyber bully. Because unlike face-to-face, where you have to look into someone'e eye and see that you're bullshit aint being bought, in cyberspace the narcissist can tell themselves they won by the force of the better argument. Retreat into adjectives with which to describe your opponents argument, and call that winning. Sound familiar?

What's interesting about Terb is that many guys on here don't grant themselves the fuji free pass. They might lie and cheat but they don't conclude from this that the only way to rationalize such behavior is to completely excuse it, even build it into a social philosophy to live by. The fuji free pass is like getting to work and finding your pants have a giant hole in the ass, and then running around telling everyone how only the most superior and enlightened beings have holes in the ass of their pants and you are fortunately one of them. The rest of us just say that every now and then a hole in the ass will happen, no need to build a life philosophy around it.

That was outstanding. Standing "O" material.