Looks like the SO is REALLY PO'd at me
- Thread starter ang
- Start date
Not wanting to bust your balls more for this, but just want to throw in my 2 cents....
You say you have trouble controlling your mouth when you are angry on numerous occasions. If so... you have a problem.
Have you considered getting some professional help?
Not intended to be derogatory, just offering a suggestion.
You say you have trouble controlling your mouth when you are angry on numerous occasions. If so... you have a problem.
Have you considered getting some professional help?
Not intended to be derogatory, just offering a suggestion.
Well the house is clean..the kids have showered and she will be home soon. I plan to take mu family out to dinner, then drop the kids off at my parents and take her out for a few drinks to unwind....wish me luck
NOPE! No slack!
Mrs Ang. should never be spoken to inappropriately (unless during sex of course). She is your partner and the mother of your children! Now, wash your mouth out with soap!
Did you clean the house yet? Did you do the yardwork? Did you entertain the children? Better get it done!
Words hurt deeper than anything!
That's a good start! Ang remember that you need to have date night weekly or bi-weekly.
http://www.couplesresort.ca/acc_Boutique_chateaus.html I've been here really nice!
http://www.vintage-hotels.com/pillarandpost/default.htm I've been here too, really nice and you can spend time in NOTL and wine touring.
http://www.algonquin-accommodation.com/accommodations.html Take the family!
Gee, I'm surprised that ANG survived last night and his manhood is still intact. Here is a true story.
Last August, I saw my neighbour across the street just waking up from his couch on his porch. I asked him if he spent the night on the porch. He said "yes". I asked "man, why?". He said " I am Italian and I called my wife a very bad name last night".
Last August, I saw my neighbour across the street just waking up from his couch on his porch. I asked him if he spent the night on the porch. He said "yes". I asked "man, why?". He said " I am Italian and I called my wife a very bad name last night".
Excellent advice! Mrs. CG and I try to do that as well... it was more difficult when the kids were younger, but now is much easier.
Dinner and dancing, or dinner and "X club", or dinner and the strip club, or sometimes just chillin on a patio bar for a few drinks and maybe some apps... sometimes we just do a nice dinner and come home and screw each others brains out...
But we rarely do the movie thing... the point is to have real interaction with each other and you can't do that at a movie.
or location.Maybe you arent going to the right movie
''northyork'' drive in, straight up the 404 to sharon...i used to love going there on long weekend all nighters...4 movies
So we had a long talk and she forgave me.....and I promised her I would NEVER say anything like that again....and I plan to keep that promise
BTW...thanks for everyone's advise
BTW...thanks for everyone's advise
Ok, going to wade in here. As a married man, for a very long time, I'll say this to you Ang and anyone else who cares to read this. Marriages are long-term cumulative relationships. Your wife, who sounds like to me, loves you. She's not reacting to a bad week and being stressed out, that's just the trigger. You're not in charge of her nor are you in charge of her emotions and how she reacts. You're only responsible for yourself and what you contribute to the relationship, positive and negative. As a general rule, this is what I suggest to you, everyone else, and what I try to do in this situation.
Give her the mea culpa she deserves. No excuses, no pointing fingers, no retorts, no keeping score on last battles, no bs. She's upset and she wants to tell you something. I suggest after your mea culpa, you listen. You may not like everything you hear, but still listen. Don't defend yourself, because then you're not listening. You don't have to agree with everything she says, but these are her feelings she's expressing, not your's. Ask her to explain what she means, nicely. Phrase it like "When you said I do xxxxxxxxx, I understand it makes you feel xxxxxxxxxxxxx?" She needs to be heard and understood. In fact, all of us need to be heard and understood when we have something important to impart. This will help her dissipate her anger and resentment and let her move forward
You also have to do work to. You need to acknowledge what did you do over time to contribute to this situation. Oh yeah brother, it's over time. These are not just isolated incidences. Figure out for yourself, are you supportive of her? Do you make an effort to show her your affection everyday? When she comes home after you do you get up from whatever you're doing and greet her? Do you both talk? I mean everyday. You have a temper, well so does everyone else. Do you really want to use it on the woman you married? Then deal with it. It's a choice.
Your wife probably loves you, otherwise she wouldn't be this upset. Whatever is offside in your relationship, like in allrelationships, needs to be addressed. A one night bandaid is useless. Commit to doing more, being a better husband and partner every f-in day. You'll both enjoy it better together.
One more thing dude, get rid of your signature pic. (that's just my opinion)
Give her the mea culpa she deserves. No excuses, no pointing fingers, no retorts, no keeping score on last battles, no bs. She's upset and she wants to tell you something. I suggest after your mea culpa, you listen. You may not like everything you hear, but still listen. Don't defend yourself, because then you're not listening. You don't have to agree with everything she says, but these are her feelings she's expressing, not your's. Ask her to explain what she means, nicely. Phrase it like "When you said I do xxxxxxxxx, I understand it makes you feel xxxxxxxxxxxxx?" She needs to be heard and understood. In fact, all of us need to be heard and understood when we have something important to impart. This will help her dissipate her anger and resentment and let her move forward
You also have to do work to. You need to acknowledge what did you do over time to contribute to this situation. Oh yeah brother, it's over time. These are not just isolated incidences. Figure out for yourself, are you supportive of her? Do you make an effort to show her your affection everyday? When she comes home after you do you get up from whatever you're doing and greet her? Do you both talk? I mean everyday. You have a temper, well so does everyone else. Do you really want to use it on the woman you married? Then deal with it. It's a choice.
Your wife probably loves you, otherwise she wouldn't be this upset. Whatever is offside in your relationship, like in allrelationships, needs to be addressed. A one night bandaid is useless. Commit to doing more, being a better husband and partner every f-in day. You'll both enjoy it better together.
One more thing dude, get rid of your signature pic. (that's just my opinion)
Just read your post, but that doesn't change my advice. Sure, she forgave you, bc she loves you. However, unless you want to continue going through this cycle, I suggest you see the big picture, look at what you bring to the relationship, where you can improve. Over time, this really makes a difference and it will make things easier. Oh, and it took me years to figure this stuff out in my own marriage, but it worked.
Good news! But that may just be short term if you don't solve the real problem.
Iconic one pretty much nailed it I think. There might be some underlying issue that is causing friction... friction that escalates and takes on a life of its own if you don't solve it now when its small. You said you had anger issues... maybe a stress relieving activity will help.... Just my nickels worth.
