when a client gets obbessive

[foxxxy lady]

I have become very friendly and loving with a couple of sps, however I don't believe I've ever been "weird". That's possibly because I don't feel I "own" people or their sexual behaviours.

I've even made clear to my wife of 45 yrs marriage that sex is play, and one should be able to love more than one person at a time, of either sex. When asked what I'd do if she had relations with another man my reply has been consistently the same. I'd ask her 2 questions. 1) Did you have a good time ? (hopefully YES, fantastic!), and 2) Do you still love me ? (hopefully YES).

We agreed at the time of our marriage we'd only stay married as long as we were friends .. so far its been great !

Friends are accepting, they don't make demands and try to control each other !!

I agree 100 percent,. Friends want you too be safe healthy and happy. They don't play mind games o abuse u spiritually, mentally or physically. That goes for any kind of relationship period and sometimes I have learned some things over the last few months and hope to have learned from my mistakes. I do not want to walk on eggshells it's more fun to fuck then fight

xo

xo

 

[IM469]

It's certainly possible to cultivate a friendship. It's just not something that happens after having an hour or 2 in the sack and you decide you are friends. I think that's where the issue that some guys have is they think a few hundred dollars gives them that kind of access. No reason that any 2 given people can't become friends over time, regardless of the circumstances in which they met. And let's be honest, some ladies like to play the "friends" card, so they can call on you to come see them when they are slow, or make you feel special so you do shit for them.

You can have a friendly professional relationship but friends don't pay to spend time with friends. Clients pay to spend time with service providers. It's a tough concept for many here to fathom but there are a lot of 50+ guys who have no idea how to meet girls so SP, MPA & dancers are now dating opportunities. The fantasy they pay for is a desperate new reality and they will be the more vocal defenders of possible relationships on this thread because their fantasy is being challenged.

The majority of service providers are honest people making a living and do care -not love - their clients. This kind of discussion must be a little tough on the service providers because they don't want to sound cold and drive away business.

I see the lonely desperate clients looking for relationships as a double edge sword. If the service provider (actually any person who is paid for their time - SP, MPA or dancer) in an effort to keep a customer accommodates this sticky syrupy love dance of the lonely - the inevitable break to avoid the onslaught of misguided attention will be messy and possibly very traumatic. On the flip side - unscrupulous service providers recognise these 'never say never' love desperate clients as marks and can fleece them for everything they have. When I was dating a dancer I saw houses, cars and jewelry given to girls by clients who actually thought they had a relationship.

There could be rare exceptions but I really think it's safer for SP & clients to keep it professional. IE: Beware of clients bearing gifts.

 

[GPIDEAL]

How little you know, In fact with some of them I know their real names Lol But maybe in your case what your saying might be true.

Agreed. There are some where you know more about their true identities (and they will know mine), but this only happens over time and with trust.

One more thing. If you have longer sessions, or do dinner/show dates, or overnights, you tend to get to know each other better. In such circumstances, not every minute is spent in a sexual moment, so you must socialize or converse. If you only do half hours or hours, once the deed is done, there's only time for small talk if any.

 

[GPIDEAL]

You can have a friendly professional relationship but friends don't pay to spend time with friends. Clients pay to spend time with service providers. It's a tough concept for many here to fathom but there are a lot of 50+ guys who have no idea how to meet girls so SP, MPA & dancers are now dating opportunities. The fantasy they pay for is a desperate new reality and they will be the more vocal defenders of possible relationships on this thread because their fantasy is being challenged.

The majority of service providers are honest people making a living and do care -not love - their clients. This kind of discussion must be a little tough on the service providers because they don't want to sound cold and drive away business.

I see the lonely desperate clients looking for relationships as a double edge sword. If the service provider (actually any person who is paid for their time - SP, MPA or dancer) in an effort to keep a customer accommodates this sticky syrupy love dance of the lonely - the inevitable break to avoid the onslaught of misguided attention will be messy and possibly very traumatic. On the flip side - unscrupulous service providers recognise these 'never say never' love desperate clients as marks and can fleece them for everything they have. When I was dating a dancer I saw houses, cars and jewelry given to girls by clients who actually thought they had a relationship.

There could be rare exceptions but I really think it's safer for SP & clients to keep it professional. IE: Beware of clients bearing gifts.

I agree with most of what you say here, however, I don't think there needs to be much caution for clients bearing gifts. Many indies advertise things that they'd like as gifts. Perhaps someone bringing a dozen roses or a heart-shaped pendant would be of concern or embarrassing. But if you surprise a regular with a nice perfume or whatever, that might brighten her day for a change and she'll appreciate it and hopefully show it he he

 

[GPIDEAL]

Ahhh. I would say that depends. I have "friends" who get pissed off if I have a differing opinion. I have friends who respect that don't agree and value my counsel when I'm being brutally honest. In the context of the biz, it's quite interesting how it plays out. Some girls just get used to being on a pedestal all day. They want sycophants. Others find candor, especially from someone who they believe actually cares, to be refreshing.

Different opinions are one thing, but I meant imposing on them, or not respecting their personal space or privacy.

 

[chongqing]

Does all this psycho babble apply to MPA's as well as escorts?.

Who needs Dr Phil when you have terb lol

 

[TeasePlease]

Does all this psycho babble apply to MPA's as well as escorts?.

Who needs Dr Phil when you have terb lol

Nope. MPAs fart rainbows.

 

[|2 /-\ | /|/]

Nope. MPAs fart rainbows.

 

[GPIDEAL]

Does all this psycho babble apply to MPA's as well as escorts?.

Who needs Dr Phil when you have terb lol

Dr. Phil would shame you on national TV and it would make for great ratings too.

We are simply sharing our experiences from our POV.

 

[Titalian]

We all have different opinions, when it comes to the subject of friendship and providers. I for one see no issue in being friends with an escort or Mpa for that matter.
But a word to the wise, if you don't keep your expectations in check, your probably going to be disappointed. Maturity and respect is ultimately important here.

 

[Eddie401]

We all have different opinions, when it comes to the subject of friendship and providers. I for one see no issue in being friends with an escort or Mpa for that matter.
But a word to the wise, if you don't keep your expectations in check, your probably going to be disappointed. Maturity and respect is ultimately important here.

You say "maturity" a lot and have changed the subject from being about the SP and her difficulties to being about the client (basically...it's now about you).

Are you the girl from Fast Times at Ridgemont High? How are you holding up? I heard you got fat.

Back to the OP: It is in fact all about you. You will get the occassional clinger. All you can do is decide the distance between you and your clients that gives you a mix of intimacy and safety that you can live with.

Good luck.

 

[GPIDEAL]

You say "maturity" a lot and have changed the subject from being about the SP and her difficulties to being about the client (basically...it's now about you).

Are you the girl from Fast Times at Ridgemont High? How are you holding up? I heard you got fat.

Back to the OP: It is in fact all about you. You will get the occassional clinger. All you can do is decide the distance between you and your clients that gives you a mix of intimacy and safety that you can live with.

Good luck.

You just chimed in and didn't see how this thread discussion has evolved.

 

[DanJ]

You can have a friendly professional relationship but friends don't pay to spend time with friends. Clients pay to spend time with service providers. It's a tough concept for many here to fathom but there are a lot of 50+ guys who have no idea how to meet girls so SP, MPA & dancers are now dating opportunities. The fantasy they pay for is a desperate new reality and they will be the more vocal defenders of possible relationships on this thread because their fantasy is being challenged.

The majority of service providers are honest people making a living and do care -not love - their clients. This kind of discussion must be a little tough on the service providers because they don't want to sound cold and drive away business.

I see the lonely desperate clients looking for relationships as a double edge sword. If the service provider (actually any person who is paid for their time - SP, MPA or dancer) in an effort to keep a customer accommodates this sticky syrupy love dance of the lonely - the inevitable break to avoid the onslaught of misguided attention will be messy and possibly very traumatic. On the flip side - unscrupulous service providers recognise these 'never say never' love desperate clients as marks and can fleece them for everything they have. When I was dating a dancer I saw houses, cars and jewelry given to girls by clients who actually thought they had a relationship.

There could be rare exceptions but I really think it's safer for SP & clients to keep it professional. IE: Beware of clients bearing gifts.

I agree, however, I was talking about being friends, not fuck buddies, or dating each other. I agree that trying to have a relationship like that is pretty risky in this business and while they do happen, they don't seem to last very long. Friendships can happen, and as I said, it takes time if it's going to happen. I can count on one finger the number of SP friends I have, and considering she has let me meet her 12 year old daughter, after knowing her for 3 years, I would say she considers me a friend too. I'm not interested in dating her nor have I tried to get free sex from her. I totally love having sex with her and I am very careful, almost to being paranoid, to not blow the chance to still have paid sessions.

I've had a number of ladies I have fallen for the "acting as friends for their gain" trap, especially when I was a newbie (although I'm still a newbie compared to many on here lol). Almost any of the ladies I saw could text me to take them to the mall, bring them food, hell, I've helped move a few of them into new incall locations. I'm done with that side of it, Dan isn't as nearly impressed with the so-called attention he used to be lol.

 

[sweetasians]

Wow, after reading all these comments I all of a sudden that I've done something wrong. I saw my sp for eight months straight without seeing anyone else. She was the one that said to me that I was going to make her fall in love me. I didn't ask to fall in love with me nor was I looking to fall in love with her. However I did anyways long story short its been over for a bit . Now to read that I am sad and pathetic makes me want to give up the hobby altogether. I am not a weirdo by any stretch of the imagination or at least I would like to think I am not. Im sure there are men that become weird its in my opinion is a very hard business to be in. Amber Im sorry to here this has happened to you However there are a lot of good men out there that respect all of the SP s out there

 

[Titalian]

You just chimed in and didn't see how this thread discussion has evolved.

Thanks GB? I didn't notice he had just chimed in Lol.

 

[maniac1911]

I think it's easy to get drawn into the illusion given that you are getting pretty intimate with someone. Just realize you are client out of hundreds clients out there. I think it's an ego thing with most guys. We tend to assume attraction from most women even when there is nothing there. From an evolutionary standpoint it makes sense if were not confident then we would not be able to procreate. Some take it too far and that's where obsession kicks in.

 

[Titalian]

I think it's easy to get drawn into the illusion given that you are getting pretty intimate with someone. Just realize you are client out of hundreds clients out there. I think it's an ego thing with most guys. We tend to assume attraction from most women even when there is nothing there. From an evolutionary standpoint it makes sense if were not confident then we would not be able to procreate. Some take it too far and that's where obsession kicks in.

So you figure, their running the show ! Lol ok.

 

[pipefitter]

I can see this happen as it has happened to me , and it happens with no intention for it to happen ,but if a client see the same girl for years, his fantasy becomes so real ,because of the connection you have developed ,the comfort ,you develop a sex bond and your emotions start playing tricks, and we confuse amazing sex as love ,because some of you girls give us such amazing sessions ,we feel in are foolish minds hey she must like me

 

[Titalian]

I can see this happen as it has happened to me , and it happens with no intention for it to happen ,but if a client see the same girl for years, his fantasy becomes so real ,because of the connection you have developed ,the comfort ,you develop a sex bond and your emotions start playing tricks, and we confuse amazing sex as love ,because some of you girls give us such amazing sessions ,we feel in are foolish minds hey she must like me

What ever you do, never confuse love or affection, with sex. What has to be understood is that sex is a primal need, where as love or affection is a human need. Example being a Friendship for another human being
or the love for a child, don't fall into the primal need. That being said its not the sex that keeps a couple alive but the affection and love. In other words caring. Jmt

 

[pipefitter]

What ever you do, never confuse love or affection, with sex. What has to be understood is that sex is a primal need, where as love or affection is a human need. Example being a Friendship for another human being
or the love for a child, don't fall into the primal need. That being said its not the sex that keeps a couple alive but the affection and love. In other words caring. Jmt

Thanks Titaian for trying to help me make sense of it .