Sleeping for free vs for pay are very, very different. If you can't tell the difference, well, I don't know what else I can say.
What to do when your feelings for a SW seem to be crossing the line ...
- Thread starter anonhobby
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Exactly. It’s one thing to enter into a relationship with a woman who has had numerous sex partners because she found them desirable and enjoyed sex, it’s another to enter into a relationship with a woman who has sex for money and wouldn’t otherwise be intimate with those men. Again, not judging or looking down on SPs, but I don’t believe you can make that comparison as if it’s the same thing.
Guys, you have both missed my point. Sex is sex and money is money. Of course there is a difference between paying for sex and free sex, but there are degrees just like in everything else. You simply can't generalize that all SP's are somehow jaded because of what they do. Agree, some girls enter this profession already with some major emotional issues and this job makes them even more messed up. But there are some escorts that are super smart and in control of their emotions. They know perfectly well what they are doing and are good business women. They are the ones that can make $5000 a night instead of a $100 for a BJ. They get to see the world, get pampered and make more money than 90% of people on this board.
I would rather spend an hour or two with a great escort than fuck all night with some drunk bimbo I met at a bar somewhere. And do not think that that just because this bimbo decided to be intimate with you and fuck for free she is not going to turn out to be bat shit crazy. And god forbid you ever have to experience the nightmare of divorce rape . Then you will realize how expensive free sex can be.
So again, we are all different and we do things for different reasons. You can't generalize and put people in neat boxes. Some escorts are smart and save their hard earned money, some spend it on drugs.
Tell her how you feel. That way she'll know how emotionally attached you are, and it makes you extremely vulnerable to her. This will allow her to drain your bank account 10x faster and leave you for dead when the money runs out.
It's called "learning the hard way" and it's your destiny.
It's called "learning the hard way" and it's your destiny.
I've actually left the business twice for clients I met through the business, and once I left the business for one gent I met outside of it.
The first guy was wonderful, although we had a major age gap, we shared a lot in common and he was a wonderful boyfriend, although he had his issues with insecurity, we have many happy memories between us.
He broke it off after 2 years, he said I deserved someone closer to my age. He has remarried a woman closer to his age and last we spoke, he's happy. (We weren't married, he had been married prior to meeting me)
The second guy promised the world and definitely fell short. He had a serious sex addiction to escorts and severe drug addiction, and it really took a toll on me mentally and emotionally. That lasted around a year.
The third guy I met on fetlife, a fetish community, and I quit the business for him, we got engaged, but his personal issues with sex addiction and seeing escorts led to my termination of our engagement.
I feel like it's a huge gamble to expect a hobbyist to remain loyal and supportive whilst trying to maintain a relationship with a SP who is either still working or who has left the business to pursue love and monogamy.
A lot of you guys don't realize you have sex addictions, and most SP's will not be willing to quit the business or put up with your shit unless you bring financial stability to the table.
The first guy was wonderful, although we had a major age gap, we shared a lot in common and he was a wonderful boyfriend, although he had his issues with insecurity, we have many happy memories between us.
He broke it off after 2 years, he said I deserved someone closer to my age. He has remarried a woman closer to his age and last we spoke, he's happy. (We weren't married, he had been married prior to meeting me)
The second guy promised the world and definitely fell short. He had a serious sex addiction to escorts and severe drug addiction, and it really took a toll on me mentally and emotionally. That lasted around a year.
The third guy I met on fetlife, a fetish community, and I quit the business for him, we got engaged, but his personal issues with sex addiction and seeing escorts led to my termination of our engagement.
I feel like it's a huge gamble to expect a hobbyist to remain loyal and supportive whilst trying to maintain a relationship with a SP who is either still working or who has left the business to pursue love and monogamy.
A lot of you guys don't realize you have sex addictions, and most SP's will not be willing to quit the business or put up with your shit unless you bring financial stability to the table.
Thanks everyone and especially the ladies for the feedback
Naturally I want to address some of the personal attacks first. If the only thing you know about me is this, people are correct in that I am lame. But I do not think I am delusional (if I truly was though I wouldn't know haha ).
I have been doing this hobby for 5-6 years and have seen a SPs once a week. So I have experience, and I know the feelings I have and the things she does are not normal. I have had other girls give me their numbers I know several girls personally and have met outside the hobby on numerous occasions some even without pay. All those times things were clear on my side, this is just a for fun thing. Now I am conflicted. I have not given this girl a chance to give me her number or her real name, she did try, as I am scared of what would happen if she does.
Lovelynns point is valid. I personally dont think I have sex addiction but I haven't gone without seeing SPs for an extended period but I think that is because I haven't tried.
I honestly have not had this much fun with anyone and the last thing I want is to loose that, I want to keep things the way they are. If I open up and start a relationship for reasons people have pointed out here there is a chance the relationship is bound to fail. If my feelings are getting too strong I will take a break from seeing her (I see her 3-5 hours a week now ). If I do take a break I will let her know via a note after our date why I am doing so, I feel she deserves to know in that situation.
Naturally I want to address some of the personal attacks first. If the only thing you know about me is this, people are correct in that I am lame. But I do not think I am delusional (if I truly was though I wouldn't know haha ).
I have been doing this hobby for 5-6 years and have seen a SPs once a week. So I have experience, and I know the feelings I have and the things she does are not normal. I have had other girls give me their numbers I know several girls personally and have met outside the hobby on numerous occasions some even without pay. All those times things were clear on my side, this is just a for fun thing. Now I am conflicted. I have not given this girl a chance to give me her number or her real name, she did try, as I am scared of what would happen if she does.
Lovelynns point is valid. I personally dont think I have sex addiction but I haven't gone without seeing SPs for an extended period but I think that is because I haven't tried.
I honestly have not had this much fun with anyone and the last thing I want is to loose that, I want to keep things the way they are. If I open up and start a relationship for reasons people have pointed out here there is a chance the relationship is bound to fail. If my feelings are getting too strong I will take a break from seeing her (I see her 3-5 hours a week now ). If I do take a break I will let her know via a note after our date why I am doing so, I feel she deserves to know in that situation.
So it's all about business in the end anyway. That's what OP is worried about.
Said it before, I'm going to say it again, I have ladies I enjoy spending time with and who I like to think enjoy my company but at the end of the day, I'm realistic about our relationship.
It's never once been an issue for me. I was "fired" as a client by a couple ladies but outside of feeling disappointed, I didn't really dwell on it.
It's never once been an issue for me. I was "fired" as a client by a couple ladies but outside of feeling disappointed, I didn't really dwell on it.
"Browsing ads"- looking and booking other ladies. "Feelings" toward professional ladies is a game for fools.
