Voice memo guy second date

[chardacerjade]

Listen to this audio and Video and give me your thoughts. I was scrolling and found this and fell in a rabbit hole of the discourse. Check link for context

View attachment 1000000510.mp4
























In case video link is broken
https://x.com/i/status/2076003008140173773

The "Voice Memo Guy" went viral after sending a voice note declining a second date because the date set a boundary against having sex. This is a summary of both sides I found. More of the debate can be found on ticktok

Side 1: coercion
Critics argue he used manipulative "therapy speak" to pressure her. By acknowledging her boundary but refusing to come over unless they had sex, he treated the relationship as purely transactional and disregarded her comfort. And using coercion and manipulation to get sex.

Side 2: Radical Honesty
Defenders argue his bluntness was a green flag. Instead of playing games, leading her on, or lying to get into her apartment, he was transparent about his intentions and saved everyone time.

 

[Shaquille Oatmeal]

This would be a red flag to most women.
I don't know who thinks this would actually make the woman want to have sex with this guy.
He sounds resentful and low key angry, that women wont fuck him after a few dates, and seems impatient to get "his money's worth" as it were, and is laying down an ultimatum.
That would be a turn off to most women imo and they would just respond with a "goodbye".

 

[Ginomore]

Assuming he’s paying for the dates-how long is he expected to wait?
He’s just saving himself time and money.

 

[chardacerjade]

The discourse online is so indecisive. They are calling him a groomer, manipulator. And coercion. And not respecting the dates feeling and boundaries.

I agree it is but coercive but he did made his feelings heard and that's okay. He could have been more smooth about it. The date can easily say no to the date and not go. But the online discourse made it feel that he should not have messaged that and put the date in a impossible place

 

[xix]

This is why I am taking a class on tarot reading and Pendulum.

 

[Endurance2024]

Bad form to leave a voice mail like this, even in a text or email. Guess I'm old school. In person during the first dates is where conversations take place and it sounds like they had discussed that. So the ultimatum message is totally wrong. He had the answer already. She wasn't ready for that so give her space or move on if it's that important to him.

 

[Kay Cee]

I saw this a few days ago, guy wanted to leave the voice memo for explicit consent and let her know he was only looking for sex after the first date and she decided to go with him on a second date which lead to another voice memo. If you weren't looking for it why even agree to a second date at all? She's not even the one who leaked it online her friend was so it implies she wasn't even against it.

 

[Valcazar]

Without the context of what led up to this voice mail, it's hard to say.
How much previous discussion was had here?

Laying out expectations and boundaries are good, it can also be weaponized because any personal interaction can be weaponized.

 

[Valcazar]

I saw this a few days ago, guy wanted to leave the voice memo for explicit consent and let her know he was only looking for sex after the first date and she decided to go with him on a second date which lead to another voice memo. If you weren't looking for it why even agree to a second date at all? She's not even the one who leaked it online her friend was so it implies she wasn't even against it.

So did she sleep with him on the second date?
Do you have a link to the second voice memo?

 

[angrymime666]

I don't disagree with his rational. His approach was far from optimal which would be a boner killer for the chick. If he reframed his approach and not leave it on voice message this would have increased his chances. It's about the feelings that he could induce if he framed it correctly which would have improved his chances on it happening. It's all about ho you make her feel in the moment.

 

[Kay Cee]

So did she sleep with him on the second date?
Do you have a link to the second voice memo?

Apparently not and that is the second voice memo from what I read

 

[Valcazar]

Apparently not and that is the second voice memo from what I read

Is there a link somewhere?

I'm curious to hear how he reacted to that.