Using your real name or going incognito when visiting SP/MA?

[Herbie]

Hi guys,

I was wondering whether the majority of clients prefer to use their "incognito" or real name when visiting an SP/MP.
Since I am relatively new to this type of hobby, I am curious what the more experienced members think about this topic including the pros and cons of going either way.

Just to set the tone for the discussion,.. the underling assumption here is that a normal guy would use fake name ONLY to protect his privacy, and not for any other purposes.

I assume that the majority of SPs would not leak their client identities voluntarily but there is still a chance that someone can get a hold of their contact list or a phone.
On the other hand, it would be kind of weird if an SP that you established a healthy, professional, "relationship" calls you by your fake name in front of your friends, in case you bump into each other. These are just some of scenarios that could justify going either way, incognito or not.

And then, there is a question of how can an SP check your background if your name doesn't match the one listed on your phone number, from which you are calling. Nowadays, almost all SP require that you call from a non-private number, so I assume the ladies have their way of checking your background when you call, or maybe not? I admit, don't know much about the screening process. Anybody knows how that works?


Thanks,
Herbie (not my real name )

 

[Cardinal Fang]

I just tell them my name is Goober McFly.

 

[Jiffy Pop]

I also use my real name. My real name is also quite common.

 

[Damondean]

I tell them I am FredZ from TERB. But they don't blieve me! )

 

[ottawageorge35]

I used to use a fake name and sometimes still do but its gets tiring because I forget the fake name I used. Sometimes I use my real name too which makes it even more confusing.

 

[Mod100]

I use Mod 99s handle to try and impress them. :thumb:

I used Sweet Petite Jessica's handle once but didn't seem to work somehow.

 

[Herbie]

I used Sweet Petite Jessica's handle once but didn't seem to work somehow.

LoL! Which one the ladies didn't buy "Sweet" or "Petite"? ..hopefully the latter

 

[Herbie]

I used to use a fake name and sometimes still do but its gets tiring because I forget the fake name I used. Sometimes I use my real name too which makes it even more confusing.

I have a similar issue with using different usernames on different forums. Sometimes I sign using a wrong username, even putting my real name.
Thank God for "edit" feature.

 

[mmad]

I always use the same name (id) on all the forums. As for MAs I use my real first name (not common) but I feel good when the MA calls me by my first name. I've booked lots through the forums so mmad and my first name are likely connected by many of my regular MAs. If my first name gives my identity away, I've got bigger problems!

 

[Catherine St.Claire]

From a SPs point of view, anyone appearing to use a fake name is treated warily which is unfortunate for all of the real John Smiths (I have had 57 on my roster). I do not keep contact information on file unless something went wrong. Waste of times, no call/no shows, bad hygiene or difficult guests get put on a detailed list. The guests that arrive on time, are clean, polite and don't bite, twist, pinch or slap will not have a detailed file.

If you stick to using reputable providers and follow their screening procedures, you won't have a problem. I would rot in a cell before giving up guests. As soon as a man says "I don't want to give you any real information" then my spidey sense kicks in. My reply is always the same. "If someone you loved did what I do, what information would you want them to have before they let someone thru the door". The bottom line is that we are daughters, mothers, sisters, wives and girlfriends, we have people who we love; love us back and it's our responsibility to keep ourselves safe.

Keep it simple, keep it real...

cat

 

[Jabba]

From a SPs point of view, anyone appearing to use a fake name is treated warily which is unfortunate for all of the real John Smiths (I have had 57 on my roster). I do not keep contact information on file unless something went wrong. Waste of times, no call/no shows, bad hygiene or difficult guests get put on a detailed list. The guests that arrive on time, are clean, polite and don't bite, twist, pinch or slap will not have a detailed file.

If you stick to using reputable providers and follow their screening procedures, you won't have a problem. I would rot in a cell before giving up guests. As soon as a man says "I don't want to give you any real information" then my spidey sense kicks in. My reply is always the same. "If someone you loved did what I do, what information would you want them to have before they let someone thru the door". The bottom line is that we are daughters, mothers, sisters, wives and girlfriends, we have people who we love; love us back and it's our responsibility to keep ourselves safe.

Keep it simple, keep it real...

cat

I respect Catherine's opinions. On this point however, I have a different perspective.
I don't believe you can equate a client using an alias to malicious, unsavoury or unhygienic intent.

Now, admittedly, I'm speaking strictly from my own experience as a 20 yr hobbyist. I'm not twisted, and hopefully haven't made it into anyone's bad books. I can still function as a trusted entity with a fake 1st name. Being a member in good standing on forums helps too. The SP only has to look at my history and postings to get an idea of what I am. On only two occasions have I revealed my true identity.

My question in response to Catherine's posting is:
How much information is required to guarantee the SP a safe encounter?
How much information does a client require from an SP to guarantee their own safety?

 

[ladez1st]

My real name is uncommon, so I feel more discreet and secure using a nickname (also an uncommon one) for the hobby. Since I use the same hobby name all the time, I have in effect, branded myself with a unique and recognizable identity. This is not unlike what the ladies do to brand and protect themselves. Moreover, I have done it this way for so long now that when I'm with one of my lovely companions, it feels perfectly natural and familiar to hear her purr my hobby name. :wink:

 

[Diver Down]

I end up using my real name as I am mostly an MP guy and I don't think on my feet fast enough when scheduling over the phone, guess I should plan it out better. Having said that, I worry about getting called out in public or worse some unscrupulous SP/MA blackmailing their client list, especially considering the Chez-what-her-name saga. Sticking to MPs means I at least have plausible reason for being there "They do what here?! I just come for a massage!"

 

[GlavaMan]

Almost all providers use discretion when out in public, they are unlikely to acknowledge a client as they know better.

 

[Catherine St.Claire]

I respect Catherine's opinions. On this point however, I have a different perspective.
I don't believe you can equate a client using an alias to malicious, unsavoury or unhygienic intent.

Now, admittedly, I'm speaking strictly from my own experience as a 20 yr hobbyist. I'm not twisted, and hopefully haven't made it into anyone's bad books. I can still function as a trusted entity with a fake 1st name. Being a member in good standing on forums helps too. The SP only has to look at my history and postings to get an idea of what I am. On only two occasions have I revealed my true identity.

My question in response to Catherine's posting is:
How much information is required to guarantee the SP a safe encounter?
How much information does a client require from an SP to guarantee their own safety?

I understand and empathize with the concerns that hobbyists have about sharing personal information. For me, I need to have a verifiable single piece of information so in the event I'm harmed, the police have somewhere to start looking. As a mother, I owe this to my daughters. In my 25 years of working in the sex trade, problems only arose with clients that I slacked on my verification with and those days are long gone. Only 2 verified clients have ever caused me physical harm in my early years, with one being a long time regular who just snapped under the influence and put me in the hospital; I was out of commission for a couple of months while my internal organs healed. Verification doesn't guarantee safety but it goes a long way to keeping those with prior intent away.

Yes, I do equate a client using an alias to malicious, unsavoury or unhygienic intent because that is what my entire lifes work experience has taught me to be true. If you need to hide your identity from me then I need to proceed with extreme caution as my well being is my responsibility alone. Trust is a two way street, if you don't trust me then I have reason to suspect you may be up to something. My verification is not difficult nor is it as extensive as many other SPs and I still get the occasional "secret agent" types who think they are far too important to give their information to a lowly hooker because she must be morally and ethically compromised. The guests with the most to lose are always the easiest to verify and never hesitate because they understand professionalism and the need for it. I would question a guest as to why they would go see a provider who doesn't verify because to me that shows a lack of professionalism and those girls are always the first to roll when the sky falls in, aren't organized enough to secure their clients information that they aquire during the visit and will be more likely to have common association with criminal elements which is where the real trouble comes in. Stick with reputable providers who veryify and you're far safer off on all fronts.

Keeping yourself safe means you deal with providers who take their business seriously. They value their clients because they understand the dynamics of building a business that will provide for themselves and their loved ones. Girls with nothing to lose are dangerous to the entire industry imo, if they don't care about themselves enough to protect themselves they sure as hell don't give a shit about guys that they see as "tricks" or "johns". In my experience these are the girls that often laugh at clients after the man leaves or mentions to their man what great electronics you have and protecting their client isn't in something they do...ever. Another reason some don't verify is that they have their own old school "security" and a perceived slight to them can carry ramifications that are completely unexpected down the road. Professional providers don't play in this mud puddle.

I don't keep "good" guest files, experience has taught me to hone my memory and keep nothing that could endanger someone who has trusted me with their information...

cat

 

[LikeRedHeads]

Catherine St Claire sounds like a real name. Is it?

 

[Catherine St.Claire]

Catherine St.Claire is a real name, just google it. Working with ones government name would simply assure that a woman who has worked as a prostitute would never be able to rent, let alone buy a home, have employment outside of this industry or maintain care and contact with her children in a separation. I have been outed and last fall I was declined employment at Tim Horton’s. I simply wanted something part time that got me out of the house but technically I am unemployable, considered unfit to pour coffee. I made it thru many levels of interviews with temp agencies, turned down as soon as they looked at my background. A work history, regardless of skill level, that involves the sex trade makes us undesirable, even to answer phones. We have a genuine need to protect our identities as best we can, and it's not limited to safety; many of us have families to support. Society shuns us on all levels.

I understand the question and the insinuation of the ask. In Canada it isn't illegal to use a pseudonym as long as there is no intent to defraud, which a reputable SP is not doing. She is simply trying to protect herself and her loved ones from a prejudice that our society isn’t ready to address. If an SP takes her business seriously then she realizes the need for total discretion when it comes to client confidentiality and will keep that trust at all costs. I've earned my stripes and proven myself on this front as anyone who knows me and my story can attest to. I realize here on TERB, SPs are expected to stay out of the fray and it wasn't my intention to challenge belief systems of the members. I'm not trying to pick an online fight here, simply trying to shed some light on an age old question and explain why it's important to be able to see both sides of the coin...

cat

 

[ladez1st]

Almost all providers use discretion when out in public, they are unlikely to acknowledge a client as they know better.

I agree, but it's the "almost" part that worries me. A nickname also helps if you were to encounter a less-than-discreet provider. If she accidentally or even intentionally "outs" you in public, she'll be using a name that you can more easily use to claim is a case of mistaken identity (unless of course, you give her enough time to describe that birthmark on your ass!). I admit the probability of needing such a contingency is extremely low, but hey, it's one less thing to worry about if you're skulking in this hobby (which most of us are).

 

[too2shy]

wandering around giving out your real name while committing a crime.. smart.

 

[bobobots5]

Almost all providers use discretion when out in public, they are unlikely to acknowledge a client as they know better.

Further, they're more likely worried that the client is the one who will make an unwise decision mistakenly.