Top five regrets of the dying

[jazzpig]

Laugh with your friends; Laugh at your enemies.

Sounds like your laughing all the time.

 

[GPIDEAL]

^^^ yes, it's great for lunch.

I was just laughing because I WISH I could be a little more miserly sometimes.

Me too :embarassed:

 

[great bear]

Sounds like your laughing all the time.

Yep. Life is good!! GB

 

[afterhours]

My top 6 are:

1. I wish I hadn't worried so much about so many things throughout my life.
2. I wish I had of understood earlier in life that the choices I make determine my happiness more than anything else.
3. I wish I had of understood earlier in life that it is not good to live in the past.
4. I wish I had of completed the things I said I would complete throughout life - keep my promises to others and accomplish my goals/tasks
5. I wish I had of been more patient
6. I wish I had of been more honest to others throughout my life

7. I wish I went to school and found out what 'had of' means.

 

[GPIDEAL]

7. I wish I went to school and found out what 'had of' means.

Confucius isn't worrying about correct spelling.

 

[Deviant]

 

[shakenbake]

It's the other way around, the system contemplates that the majority of people should live the life of regret.
If all the hamsters run away, the wheel will stop turning.

Actually, hamsters love to run in their wheels. That is why they do it.

 

[OddSox]

No regrets. A lot of mistakes that I would probably do differently in hindsight, but I learned from them and they made me the person I am. (Oh and I did go skydiving +1!).

 

[Berlin]

... but I think there is a balance- one needs to work hard but also you need to take some time with family and friends. sometimes you need to grind it out for years but eventually you can make time. (not that you can stop working hard, but eventually a balance is doable)

Indeed.

Balance.

From her web site, Inspiration and Chai
http://www.inspirationandchai.com/Regrets-of-the-Dying.html

For many years I worked in palliative care. My patients were those who had gone home to die. Some incredibly special times were shared. I was with them for the last three to twelve weeks of their lives.

People grow a lot when they are faced with their own mortality. I learnt never to underestimate someone's capacity for growth. Some changes were phenomenal. Each experienced a variety of emotions, as expected, denial, fear, anger, remorse, more denial and eventually acceptance.

Every single patient found their peace before they departed though, every one of them.

...

When you are on your deathbed, what others think of you is a long way from your mind. How wonderful to be able to let go and smile again, long before you are dying.


Life is a choice.

It is YOUR life.

Choose consciously, choose wisely, choose honestly.

Choose happiness.

 

[username999]

I first came across this article after my dad died a little over a year ago at St. Joseph's. Dying in a hospital is something I will definitely try to avoid if at all possible. His death lead me on a journey of soul searching on which I expect to continue for the rest of my life.

There are a number of good ideas in the article that are worth contemplating.

One of the philosophies that I have found most compelling is Buddhism.

Buddhism recognizes Four Noble Truths

1- Life entails dissatisfaction.
2- Dissatisfaction is a result of clinging, craving.
3- There is an end to all dissatisfaction (nirvana).
4- The way to the end of dissatisfaction is the path.

The Path

1) Right view 2) Right thought 3) Right speech 4) Right actions 5) Right livelihood 6) Right effort 7) Right mindfulness 8) Right concentration

Cardinal precepts

No killing, No stealing, No lying, No intoxicants, No sexual abuse

The Three Poisons

1) Greed 2) Hate 3) Delusion

The Four Sblime states

1) Lovingkindness
2) Compassion
3) Sympathetic joy
4) Equanimity

 

[fuji]

Plus, it is so much fun burning fake money at grave sites.

 

[freedom3]

2. I wish I hadn't worked so hard.

"This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children's youth and their partner's companionship. Women also spoke of this regret, but as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence."

For men, try getting married and not being the breadwinner. You won't get very far.