Techie Rant

[i_am_good]

So I get a call from a client who cannot use my software. She's getting an access denied message on her workstation. Right away, I figure it's a permissions issue. The data files are being saved to a Server but the user does not have sufficient rights.

So, to prove it to her, I get her to go into Windows Explorer and try to create a folder on the Server. She gets an access denied error. I tell her to get her techie to provide the proper rights. She then tells me that she DOES have rights. I say no, we just proved it - you got an error message. She insists that she has rights. She says, "I can walk over to the Server and create a folder, so I have rights".

Ok!

Believe it or not, I've have better calls. Like the time a client's keyboard was unplugged and she did not know why the words she was typing were disappearing.

 

[benstt]

Believe it or not, I've have better calls. Like the time a client's keyboard was unplugged and she did not know why the words she was typing were disappearing.

Let's raise a glass for the poor techies with this thankless task. I've had to remotely diagnose problems for some ditzy people, and can't imagine doing it for a living.

Me: What do you you see on the screen?
Them: oooh, it changed.
Me: Do you see the little File button at the top left? It showed up on mine.
Them: nooooo, this is different. never seen this before.
Me: What do you see? Can you read it to me?
Them: the thingy went away. You should see this!
Me: arrrrrgh

Ad nauseum.

 

[Remo]

Doing any kind of tech support you quickly learn how poorly people speak English. So many people suffer a break down between their brain and their mouth when it comes to describing a problem. Oh, you also learn that people can't read the error messages that a computer displays.

I drove across town once to pop a floppy out of an A: because when I asked if there was a message that indicated there was disk in there displayed on screen, the person said "no" because the words of the message and what I said were not identical.

 

[You Bet!]

You should have to pass a basic test (like driving a car) before being allowed to purchase a computer of any kind.

 

[1HandInMyPocket]

Believe it or not, I've have better calls. Like the time a client's keyboard was unplugged and she did not know why the words she was typing were disappearing.

okay I am not the most computer literate person but I do understand the basics. However, I had a similar incident were I had a brain fart. I couldn't log onto the net one time, and I kept getting wrong password message. Turns out my Caps Lock was on and I didn't know it (the top of my keyboard is not always visible due it's position on my desk so I couldn't see the light on)

 

[tboy]

The very BEST one I heard of was during a computer training course the instructor told use about the time he told the class "to push any key to continue" (don't know if that ever comes up nowadays) and he got one lady saying "my keyboard doesn't have the any key"......

This is also a famous one:

Caller calls tech support on a saturday:
Dingbat:My computer won't turn on...
Techie: Did you push the on button
Digbat: yes
Techie: Where are you calling from? (since it's a saturday)
Digbat: My office
Techie: Look behind the computer and follow the power cord and see if it's plugged in
Digbat: I can't see anything under my desk, all the lights are off and I can't turn them on.....

 

[spatial_k]

Hehe, in these cases you tell them "It's a clear case of PEBCAK."

 

[ig-88]

So I get a call from a client who cannot use my software. She's getting an access denied message on her workstation. Right away, I figure it's a permissions issue. The data files are being saved to a Server but the user does not have sufficient rights.

So, to prove it to her, I get her to go into Windows Explorer and try to create a folder on the Server. She gets an access denied error. I tell her to get her techie to provide the proper rights. She then tells me that she DOES have rights. I say no, we just proved it - you got an error message. She insists that she has rights. She says, "I can walk over to the Server and create a folder, so I have rights".

Is she hot? If so, a lot can be forgiven.

 

[WhaWhaWha]

I provide tech sipportfor wireless devices including Blackberries.
I get calls from people who cant make calls or send or receive emails.
Me: Ok lets reset your wireless mode, first turn it off
Caller: It is off thats why I'm calling...


Even better, I get a call from a man living in the Mohave Desert. Just bought a Palm Treo and only had one question:
"What is the Internet?"