Signs you may be pooning too much

[Mr Bret]

The auto-corrector on your phone keeps popping acronyms it shouldn't know...! cim, cimsw, dfk...

When typing Happy Birthday to friends and family on FB or elsewhere, your fingers automatically type daty.

 

[GameBoy27]

When talking about the housing market at a party, you accidentally mention TERB instead of TREB.

 

[Mishman527]

• You've seen a few of your favourites disappear/retire and wish they would return
• When you're on a casual drive with the family, passing the locations you've been to before and remembering the SPs you've seen there

• You see attractive girls in public and realize you've seen a few SPs like her and don't feel a strong need to wonder what it's like since you kinda already know.

• You have your go-to ATM locations
• You keep minty fresh gum in your car to use on the way

• You think about post-session restaurant options

• You know where the elevator is at several 'locations'
• You forgot to throw out that parking ticket from that one appointment

 

[Kracker]

You schedule your work meetings and appointments around your favourite MPA's schedule.

Fucking do that all the time! Hate that it's true.

 

[John Wick]

You have shitty sex with your SO and the moment she's asleep, you're on TERB drafting a negative review.

 

[IM469]

You are thinking that if John has closed the CA & Loco, maybe you will go to Kennedy's.

 

[ezpzezpz]

After having some wonderful young tight pussy you sadly realize your wife's loose one doesn't cut it anymore.

You're saving Birthday money, Christmas money, Father's Day money, spare change for pooning.

You're buying super thin condoms in boxes of 12 or 24!

You see a hot girl in public and think to yourself yeah I've fucked someone as hot or hotter than you many times. And it feels gooood!

 

[John Wick]

You re-label your wife's Xmas gift to give to your regular because you simply can't show up for the last session of the year without a 'token of appreciation'.

 

[goalie000]

You head out to the grocery store and end up at your favourites incall place!!

 

[jsanchez]

You check into a hotel room while on vacation and wouldn''t sleep before inspecting the bed sheet and pillows for cum stains.

 

[fedor77]

Your dick is SORE!

 

[John Wick]

You have a massive toothache that needs attention, but instead of reading the dentist's website for office hours or calling direct, you send them a text message at midnight that says 'you available, baby?'

When they don't answer right away, you send a stream of follow on text messages telling them 'it's your loss 'cause I'm a young guy with great teeth and lots of cash to spend, you stuck up cunt.'

Note: PLEASE...don't ever do this!

 

[massman]

You text your SO “hey bb” and your phone autocompletes it to “bbbj”

 

[Robert Mugabe]

For you, ATM doesn't mean a bank machine.

 

[itd131]

You get a second job. Then a third job.

 

[jalimon]

Your dick is SORE!

Yeah... Or if your dick looks like a marinated jalapeno... time to take a little break