Sex bloopers

[genintoronto]

My most recent sex blooper:

In the heat of the action, we take a few seconds break to add some lubrification to our engines, and resume the action.

Half a second later, as John goes back to pumping away, I'm overwhelmed by an intense burning sensation in my pussy and have to stop everything to run to the bathtub and sit in warm water for a little while.

For those who have always wondered, Purell is NOT a good lubricant.


What's your blooper?

 

[Ladyraven]

LMAO.. oh thats just horrible .. but to funny.. hope everything is good down there now..

 

[genintoronto]

LMAO.. oh thats just horrible .. but to funny.. hope everything is good down there now..

All is good. Made for a good laugh after the burning subsided. And I guess my pussy is sanitized now.

 

[Deviant]

And I guess my pussy is sanitized now.)

From the Purell or the Heat?

 

[calloway]

For those who have always wondered, Purell is NOT a good lubricant.

 

[winstar]

Yikes!

 

[scarlet6969]

ive queefed a few times a few good loud ones that made me giggle

 

[calloway]

ive queefed a few times a few good loud ones that made me giggle

While the guy was performing DATY?

 

[scarlet6969]

no but it was done when the guy was pounding away in doggy position

 

[genintoronto]

ive queefed a few times a few good loud ones that made me giggle

Hehe. I always thought that queefs are so funny (and the term for them even more so). But then again, I find farts hilarious too.

 

[Ladyraven]

Hehe. I always thought that queefs are so funny (and the term for them even more so). But then again, I find farts hilarious too.

ok speaking of farts.. a few years back I had my bf at the time eating me out and he kept lifting my ass and well he starting rimming and I farted full in his face ..

 

[winstar]

I actually find queefing to be a turn on, I don't know why exactly, but it's like the pussy is saying to my cock "yeaaaah" in pussy lingo.

I might be totally wrong. Of course, I don't think a fart is the body's way of saying hello to my cock, more like "run!"

 

[calloway]

 

[winstar]

ok speaking of farts.. a few years back I had my bf at the time eating me out and he kept lifting my ass and well he starting rimming and I farted full in his face ..

Brutal! But still funny Did that change anything?

 

[blank_dave]

Now I don't have the experience that others have here, but I do have an amusing moment from my first time.

I had just finishing off some daty on Britney (had taken a skull squeeze for it too), and she was cooling down. I said something about trying something different, and she made a noncommital sound...But the second I started to move, she planted a big right foot on my left shoulder blade. So I found myself pinned to the bed with my face in her crotch, and unable to move.

 

[Ladyraven]

Brutal! But still funny Did that change anything?

yeah he always asked if I had to get rid of anything when he would go down after that.. so now I have a fear of farting during daty..

 

[smylee52]

.
I was getting an excellent porn star blowjob from this now retired SP . We were both right into it and as I got close she asked me if I'd like to jerk off into her mouth , like a real porn star , Of course I said sure that would be hot . She then made it very clear that there would be no COF or COB just strictly in the mouth and no where else . I told her , keep sucking and don't worry . When time came I took my cock out of her mouth and took myself in hand . All of a sudden my allergy flared up and I had an uncontrollable urge to sneeze .
Well my sneezes start somewhere around my toes and when they come out their is enough wind and spray to power a sail boat so I instinctively put my hands up to my face to block the spray from raining on the SP . Sure enough I was sneezing and cumming almost simultaneously and my dick was no longer being guided into her mouth . Next thing I hear is " Jesus what the hell did I just finish telling you " as I looked at her glazed face and the most unamused expression you could imagine .
I tried to explain but she really, really didn't like COF . Telling her it wasn't that bad because most actually got on her tits didn't help my cause .
Never made that mistake again .

 

[TPO]

I guess my pussy is sanitized now.

No H1N1 for Gen.

 

[Moraff]

All is good. Made for a good laugh after the burning subsided. And I guess my pussy is sanitized now.

Did you put a little paper strip acoss it like they used to do in the hotel rooms? "Sanitized for your Protection."

 

[LadyTY2Uall]

Hehe. I always thought that queefs are so funny (and the term for them even more so). But then again, I find farts hilarious too.

I am SO glad I am not the only one......uncontrollable giggles for either.