Science Jokes

[danmand]

Schrodingers cat walks into a bar, and doesn't.

 

[danmand]

One atom says: "I think I lost an electron". The other atom says: "Are you positive?"

 

[danmand]

if doctors can't He or CM, they Ba!

 

[danmand]

Potassium is racist. If 3 atoms get together you have a KKK meeting.

 

[dirkd101]

I've kept my ion this, but chemistry is such a bohr. Physics is where it's at.

 

[Celticman]

I've kept my ion this, but chemistry is such a bohr. Physics is where it's at.

dirk Neils to come up with bohr

 

[SchlongConery]

I remember back when I was a kid, in chemistry class at school the teacher asked us for a 1000 word essay on Acid.

I didn't do too well as my pen turned into a gorilla and the floor melted.

 

[SchlongConery]

I possess a device, in my pocket, that is capable of accessing the entirety of information known to man.

I use it to look at pictures of cats and get in arguments with strangers.

-sent from my iPhone

 

[SchlongConery]

My brother-in-law insists that he should name his son 'Kelvin'.
But I think the chance of that is Absolute Zero.

 

[SchlongConery]

Spent so long today trying to think of a good electricity joke my head hertz!

 

[great bear]

Spent so long today trying to think of a good electricity joke my head hertz!

Most electricity humour has a lengthy opening line. "Say did you hear the one about the electrifying Pole? He was really strung out"

 

[Nate1]

My brother-in-law insists that he should name his son 'Kelvin'.
But I think the chance of that is Absolute Zero.

Have you suggested Darwin, it's a Natural.

 

[Why Not?]

How aout a funny poem?

Jonny was a very bright boy
but Jonny is no more
Jonny added H2O
to H2SO4

 

[dirkd101]

This thread is too elemental for me.

 

[dirkd101]

I'm not going to compound the problem and try and keep it going either.

 

[Anynym]

... keep it going ether.

Small typo, fixed for you. Wouldn't want anyone to cast a hexane on you.

 

[Phil C. McNasty]

I'm not going to compound the problem and try and keep it going either

I cant help but periodically check this thread out though

 

[NHFL]

I'm not going to compound the problem and try and keep it going either.

If we are going to compound things, this thread needs mortar and less pestle.

 

[bobistheowl]

How many Staphylococcus bacteria can screw in a light bulb?

8.03779 times ten to the power of 13, assuming Volume equals 26.847 cm³, and Standard Temperature and Pressure¹, with a peak of 1.77057 * 10^14 at 39.58° Celsius and 137.09 kPa.²

¹ Meineke, U. West Va, (1973)
² ibid.

 

[rex_baner]

2 atoms are sitting in a bar. One says to the other, "I think I've lost an electron." The other asks "Are you sure?" To which the 1st repsponds, "I'm positive."