Retirement

[Zippythepinhead]

You're looking for "the reason to get out of bed everyday". I'm not retired, but was off for 18 months. Not feeling "needed". Not feeling like I was accomplishing anything. Luckily I landed something that gives me all that back. But it opened my eyes to what MY retirement might look like and I wasn't ready.

Sounds like you're "not ready".

So as others have mentioned, do things that give you back that reason to get out of bed: be it volunteering or taking a part-time gig. (I've contemplated going back to a "service job" like I did in college in retirement with no-stress.) Mentor. Build something you always wanted to, that requires planning. That requires collaboration with others. That requires interaction. Even if it's only on forums with like-minded people. Find the thing that gets you out of bed and looking forward to it.

Thanks for the reply. Sounds like you took that 18 month hiatus and found not only a way to address the non-financial challenges of being out of work, but also a framework for planning for retirement. Sounds like a “silver lining” that you made happen out of a tough situation. Congratulations…I hope to do the same

 

[Zippythepinhead]

My father who passed a decade back told me you need 4 things in retirement:

1) Something to keep your mind active and sharpe.
2) Something to keep you social
3) Something to do that is creative and fun
4) Something to keep you active.

The four can be met with one thing or separate things but each person will need a balance of the four suitable to themselves.

My father was an active angler - ocean, streams, mountain lakes etc... He participated in both hunting and fishing clubs as well as volunteering at hatcheries. He also helped organize neighborhood events - fundraising BBQs, potluck dinners etc. And, them during the winter he spent his time building R/C planes, some kit based, others his own crazy designs. As for being active: he hiked, chopped wood, helped clean up beaches etc....

An interesting list! I have numbers 2-4 covered. Number 1? Nope. And that feels like the tough one

 

[The Options Menu]

An interesting list! I have numbers 2-4 covered. Number 1? Nope. And that feels like the tough one

Given your background maybe try volunteering at your local community center, or with a community group? (Though given your experience you'd probably have to resist actively, or accidentally, taking charge.) In my experience they can always use a physical hand, and people to collaboratively and constructively help plan and brainstorm things.

 

[Shaquille Oatmeal]

Since you have community/public service experience, see if you can do some work on a consulting basis or on a voluntary basis.
That way you'd dictate your own hours.
You could reach out to past contacts and your network to make that happen.
Its important to keep that mind active.
Also if you have the money and means, you could travel, do some hobbies etc.,

 

[Zippythepinhead]

Given your background maybe try volunteering at your local community center, or with a community group? (Though given your experience you'd probably have to resist actively, or accidentally, taking charge.) In my experience they can always use a physical hand, and people to collaboratively and constructively help plan and brainstorm things.

Your post mentions a point that makes many of my former colleagues chuckle...me working for and taking orders from others. They think it beyond my abilities and personality Truthfully, one of the things my job taught me was the value that a strong employee, no matter his or her title, brings to an organization. There is honor in being a good employee...being reliable, showing up on time, thinking about getting results rather than just following thru on tasks, strong work ethic, etc. Those are the things I demanded of my staff, and things that i would hope to bring to a job...without having to be in charge. Thanks for the post!

 

[Jenesis]

Volunteer somewhere that is emotionally fulfilling. A shelter, hospital, etc.

 

[Mr Deeds]

I retired 2 years ago did some traveling went down to equidor to live for about 3 months. Got bored to tears. My brain was turning to mush. I Came back. Now. I work short-term contracts. I realize that I cannot retire.

 

[Zippythepinhead]

I retired 2 years ago did some traveling went down to equidor to live for about 3 months. Got bored to tears. My brain was turning to muso. I. Came back now. I work short-term contracts. I realize that I cannot retire.

sounds like you found a good compromise and are attending to Point #1 about keeping your mind active and sharp. Now I know how Mr. Deeds keeps his wits sharp to call out newbies who want veteran Terbies to do all their research and work for them!

 

[teddy2222]

One of the most helpful things I heard from someone further into retirement than me was that it takes time to learn how to do it well, to develop the new, skills, abilities, and knowledge to make it a satisfying experience. It’s a years-long process, not an overnight switch. Focusing on cultivating relationships is key - relationships with real emotional intimacy, not the pretend kind we pursue in this hobby. When we’re working, we have a built-in social network that largely goes away when we transition to retirement. But, the opportunity to develop relationships that are centered on the things we deeply value rather than on what we need to accomplish in our careers is gold. Paying attention to our physical health is also a really good idea, not to look good for our ATF of the moment, but to ensure that we can continue to do things that make our lives fun and interesting. When I was in my 50’s, I thought that was the best, so much better than being 20, or 30, or 40. Now, in my late 60’s and a few years into retirement, life is better than it’s ever been. I look at job postings from time to time, but always quickly remember what going to work would mean. And, the people I know who’ve gone back to work after retiring for a couple years have reversed course as quickly as they can. Treat yourself like someone you love - be kind and patient.

 

[jeff2]

One of the most helpful things I heard from someone further into retirement than me was that it takes time to learn how to do it well, to develop the new, skills, abilities, and knowledge to make it a satisfying experience. It’s a years-long process, not an overnight switch. Focusing on cultivating relationships is key - relationships with real emotional intimacy, not the pretend kind we pursue in this hobby. When we’re working, we have a built-in social network that largely goes away when we transition to retirement. But, the opportunity to develop relationships that are centered on the things we deeply value rather than on what we need to accomplish in our careers is gold. Paying attention to our physical health is also a really good idea, not to look good for our ATF of the moment, but to ensure that we can continue to do things that make our lives fun and interesting. When I was in my 50’s, I thought that was the best, so much better than being 20, or 30, or 40. Now, in my late 60’s and a few years into retirement, life is better than it’s ever been. I look at job postings from time to time, but always quickly remember what going to work would mean. And, the people I know who’ve gone back to work after retiring for a couple years have reversed course as quickly as they can. Treat yourself like someone you love - be kind and patient.

There is always financial pornography. No sure if you like to follow that investing stuff and I guess maybe it could be called fiction to some degree.

 

[Zippythepinhead]

One of the most helpful things I heard from someone further into retirement than me was that it takes time to learn how to do it well, to develop the new, skills, abilities, and knowledge to make it a satisfying experience. It’s a years-long process, not an overnight switch. Focusing on cultivating relationships is key - relationships with real emotional intimacy, not the pretend kind we pursue in this hobby. When we’re working, we have a built-in social network that largely goes away when we transition to retirement. But, the opportunity to develop relationships that are centered on the things we deeply value rather than on what we need to accomplish in our careers is gold. Paying attention to our physical health is also a really good idea, not to look good for our ATF of the moment, but to ensure that we can continue to do things that make our lives fun and interesting. When I was in my 50’s, I thought that was the best, so much better than being 20, or 30, or 40. Now, in my late 60’s and a few years into retirement, life is better than it’s ever been. I look at job postings from time to time, but always quickly remember what going to work would mean. And, the people I know who’ve gone back to work after retiring for a couple years have reversed course as quickly as they can. Treat yourself like someone you love - be kind and patient.

One of the most helpful things I heard from someone further into retirement than me was that it takes time to learn how to do it well, to develop the new, skills, abilities, and knowledge to make it a satisfying experience. It’s a years-long process, not an overnight switch. Focusing on cultivating relationships is key - relationships with real emotional intimacy, not the pretend kind we pursue in this hobby. When we’re working, we have a built-in social network that largely goes away when we transition to retirement. But, the opportunity to develop relationships that are centered on the things we deeply value rather than on what we need to accomplish in our careers is gold. Paying attention to our physical health is also a really good idea, not to look good for our ATF of the moment, but to ensure that we can continue to do things that make our lives fun and interesting. When I was in my 50’s, I thought that was the best, so much better than being 20, or 30, or 40. Now, in my late 60’s and a few years into retirement, life is better than it’s ever been. I look at job postings from time to time, but always quickly remember what going to work would mean. And, the people I know who’ve gone back to work after retiring for a couple years have reversed course as quickly as they can. Treat yourself like someone you love - be kind and patient.

Tons of good advice there…whoever got you thinking that way really started you and your retirement off in the right direction. Got to the end of your post and realized that being kind and patient to and with ourselves is not always the easiest thing. Not a bad thing to work on

 

[LTO_3]

Ahhhh, retirement, I love it now. But I have to admit the first few months were a challenge because there were days when I would wake up, jump out of bed swearing at myself that I was late for work before I realized I was retired. I'd laugh at myself as I'd pour myself a cup of coffee and relaxed in a chair while drinking my coffee. Mind you that passed fairly quickly. Yes I missed the people and the work I did but did not miss the deadlines and/or the politics involved.
Having said that, I knew I was financially secure but you need a plan to stay busy and relevant FOR YOURSELF! That you're not in charge takes a while to de-escalate but replace that with projects around your home or as previously mentioned volunteer for a group or groups. DON'T take a position of being in charge but take a position to just do a job. Take my word that's tough to do but what's great is you do the job and when you leave you feel great about what you did without the extra baggage of "crossing all the T's and dotting the i's".
In time you'll find you and you mind set while "gear down" and you'll enjoy the downtime that comes with retirement. And throw in some travel time or going to restaurants, movies, etc you always wanted to go to but had no time.

LTO_3

 

[countd]

You can spend a good part of the day just reading posts on this site if your so inclined. I've become an avid reader since retirement. I also enjoy travel. I find just planning a trip is very enjoyable! Good luck to all retitrees!

 

[Adamxx]

Language and it’s play on our mind, may be the biggest challenge.

Never really liked the common perception of the word ‘Retried’.

Here are 3 interesting links.

Etymology corner: Retirement – Why all retirees should be jubilant! – Nobleword

The Reason I Hate The Word 'Retirement'

https://schulzwealth.com/blog/i-hate-the-term-retirement

 

[Fun For All]

My father who passed a decade back told me you need 4 things in retirement:

1) Something to keep your mind active and sharpe.
2) Something to keep you social
3) Something to do that is creative and fun
4) Something to keep you active.

The four can be met with one thing or separate things but each person will need a balance of the four suitable to themselves.

My father was an active angler - ocean, streams, mountain lakes etc... He participated in both hunting and fishing clubs as well as volunteering at hatcheries. He also helped organize neighborhood events - fundraising BBQs, potluck dinners etc. And, them during the winter he spent his time building R/C planes, some kit based, others his own crazy designs. As for being active: he hiked, chopped wood, helped clean up beaches etc....

I do achieve those four things you mentioned and in retirement I work harder now than I did when I was working

 

[Mr Deeds]

sounds like you found a good compromise and are attending to Point #1 about keeping your mind active and sharp. Now I know how Mr. Deeds keeps his wits sharp to call out newbies who want veteran Terbies to do all their research and work for them!

Who me?

 

[Zippythepinhead]

I retired on my investments in my early-mid 40s, some time ago. It was one of the best decisions I ever made and I have zero regrets. I've kept busy, occasionally kept touch with work collogues but not really. Work friendships aren't really friendships right?

It obviously sounds like you've made your job, you. Remember, we are not our job or career. You're missing the challenges, the stresses, the mountain to overcome.

This has nothing to do with external forces and everything to do with you. It's not my intent to insult but it sounds like, due to your personality, you're unable to create goals and challenges on your own. This is what it comes down to.

Since your personality depends on external goals, as other have said, you need to join or apply to something. School or volunteering. Buy and old house, learn how to renovate. Electrical, plumbing, structural work, concrete. Flip the house. If you break even, wonderful. If you lose $ on it, who cares since that's the price of entertainment.

Alternatively, if you're able to, set internal goals and CREATE A SENSE OF URGENCY that you need to push yourself to accomplish....

• Get a gym membership. Go to a gym where your able to track yourself compared to others. Since you have LOTS of time, you should be able to kick ass since most track activity. The longer you're working out equals more 'activity'. You're not doing anything else so wake up at 4am, work out for 3+ hours and set either weight loss, heart rate goals or strength goals. Get pissed off that some 20-something chickee who does aerobics is kicking your ass on points.

• Get a Reddit account or even better use TERB since it's not as heavily moderated. Argue with every dickhead there. In order to effectively argue, you really need to understand the subject. This will create stress but additionally, you will completely learn new subjects. Argue the opposite of what you believe. This will stretch your thinking and will take a LOT of time. Warning though, you'll quickly end up really, really looking for someone to tell you something new...and get bored. Most people aren't that smart & just argue the same old stupid dumb shit (see the political section in TERB). But, it will take a few years if you're lucky.

Good luck.

Interesting take. I can honestly say that I am FAR better at achieving set goals than I am at setting them in the first place. With regard to your comment/suggestion regarding the political section... i dont know whether i should be intrigued or afraid

 

[Butler1000]

When I go in the next few years I am already planning for travel. You will now have the time. Visit odd cities, maybe to see sports? For me it will also be about art galleries, and other museums. Every city has them.

After that day to day? I personally plan to start running on line D&D games again. Lots of time to plan them. Continue experiments with cooking. Maybe work seasonal or part time just for cash and a change.

Now is the time, if you have a secure income steam from a govt pension, CPP etc and private investments, to get out if your comfort zone a bit. Try a small part time business, you can afford to fail. Volunteer. Mentor. Consult. Set your schedule.

Go live somewhere for a month or so. Use an Airbnb. Whole world out there. Go look around.

 

[AlinaDD]

Drop in centres and group homes, senior homes could always use volunteers. Many of these people are isolated and don't have visitors. It would mean the world to them if you gave them your time.

 

[angrymime666]

It's tough since I can partially relate. The lack of purpose is indeed something I struggle with.

Retired at 51 continue to plan for the future with no purpose. I guess you could call it making lists of things I want to do and doing them. Finding long term purpose still alludes me. Start a family, become a multimillionaire, build a death house, I don't know.

I run around doing things but it's not really a purpose.

I have never had satisfaction from job or the praise of others. Achieving goals was my greatest purpose but I have basically completed them all.

It's like my life has no meaning and is hedonistic.