Old fling won't be my facebook friend just because she's married

alexmst

New member
Dec 27, 2004
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Yes, I was facebook friends with an ex-gf, then a couple of years later she got married and messaged me that we couldn't be facebook friends any longer as her husband didn't like single guys being on her friends list. She removed all the other single guys from her list too, so nothing personal.
 

Hangman

The Ideal Terbite
Aug 6, 2003
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We have various different theories here. I did ask her directly why, and all she said was that she feels guilty.
Well, there's your answer. "It's not you, it's her" LOL

How tall is she? Is her husband taller than you? Is he taller than her? What's their wingspan? Does his height make you mad?

Did you tell her you got leg-lengthened? Or that you agonzied over, practically stalked, then struck out with a lesbian at work? Because I can't believe she would reject you after knowing all that.

Clearly her marriage is to blame, not your being creepy on the Internet.
 

Powershot

Active member
May 18, 2003
2,059
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38
I think she's just using marriage as an excuse because she realized after all these years she would still have to deal with your adolescent questions and awkwardness and didn't want them on her FB page.
 

esoterica

Member
Nov 9, 2004
739
1
18
Under the bed
I think she wants you and is playing hard to get. You should insist she add you, even if you have to phone and text her every 30 min until she does. Also, ask her out a lot.

Or not
 

massman

Well-known member
Sep 8, 2001
4,858
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We have various different theories here. I did ask her directly why, and all she said was that she feels guilty.
Well she feels guilty likely because she still feels a tiny sense of "what if?..." about the two of you as a couple, and maybe still has some warm feelings, but doesnt want to take a chance at screwing up her nice married life.

Just take it as a compliment, respect her wishes and move on.
 

hyperdog

Banned
Aug 13, 2007
1,055
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Yes, I was facebook friends with an ex-gf, then a couple of years later she got married and messaged me that we couldn't be facebook friends any longer as her husband didn't like single guys being on her friends list. She removed all the other single guys from her list too, so nothing personal.
This right here is the point I'm trying to make. It's not about how can I persuade her let me fuck her. It's about the fact the some women just act so fucked up just because they are married. All I'm doing is venting over that.
 

james t kirk

Well-known member
Aug 17, 2001
24,072
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Yes, I was facebook friends with an ex-gf, then a couple of years later she got married and messaged me that we couldn't be facebook friends any longer as her husband didn't like single guys being on her friends list. She removed all the other single guys from her list too, so nothing personal.
Lame.

However, she made the decision (albeit coerced to do so) so you have to live with it.

I always laugh at guys who are so insecure.
 

blackrock13

Banned
Jun 6, 2009
40,084
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This right here is the point I'm trying to make. It's not about how can I persuade her let me fuck her. It's about the fact the some women just act so fucked up just because they are married. All I'm doing is venting over that.
As I said earlier about you being such a expert on marriage, it's not just women who get fucked up by marriage and it would appear you're well on the way from the other side of the room. Marriage didn't fuck her up. She just has different priorities now and apparently they don't involve you. Many people after they marry loose contact with the single friends, especially of the opposite sex. Since you haven't part of her life for some time now it's even more likely. Enjoy the time you spent and got updated on her life and let it go.

If your recent post and some your past one are any example maybe she's matured faster than you have.
 

NoFatties

New member
Aug 2, 2011
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Marriage didn't fuck her up. She just has different priorities now and apparently they don't involve you.
Just the fact that you started this threat and are pissed off proves her reasoning was justified. I'm guessing that when she met you and saw your reaction that an alarm went off that you could become a nuisance. Remember she dated you so I'm sure she can read your intentions.
 

blackrock13

Banned
Jun 6, 2009
40,084
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Just the fact that you started this threat and are pissed off proves her reasoning was justified. I'm guessing that when she met you and saw your reaction that an alarm went off that you could become a nuisance. Remember she dated you so I'm sure she can read your intentions.
Just hint, I didn't start this thread and she didn't date me, Careful who you quote.
 

HG Hunter

Active member
Jun 27, 2005
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I think that some women, probably more than men, tend to carry a torch for exes long after things are over. These women may think that guys are like that too. I'm sure some are, but most I know are able to remain friends after and not be bothered by the past.
I have one friend who had a first serious gf in his late teens-early 20s. Long after they broke up, he married and his wife never wanted to even acknowledge that this former gf even existed.
The ex gf sadly passed away in her mid 30s and my buddy's wife didn't even want him to go to the funeral. The ex gf's whole family was there, including her then husband and kids, and obviously her parents and siblings.
My buddy went to the funeral, but it was a bone of contention for quite some time.
Some people are simply more possessive than others.
If my wife knew about my hobbying, she might also question some of my facebook friends.
 

hornydavid

Banned
Jul 29, 2011
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Maybe the reference to "guilty" was a soft-pedal version of that?


Three observations:
I recently met an acquaintance from high school and the surprise and spontaneous nature of the meeting made me happy and we had an enthusiastic visit. A few days later I realised why I had not kept in touch and why I had to keep far far away from them.

Most women seem to like to use nice ways to say “ I do not want you in my life because you are not the kind of person I want in my life” Guilty sounds like a nice way of saying it.

One of my work buddies often says “I would love to, but my wife would object”. I heard him turn down a fishing trip using that excuse. I know he hates fishing. Seems a lot use their spouse as an excuse to avoid things they do not like.
 

red

you must be fk'n kid'g me
Nov 13, 2001
17,569
8
38
grow up and use your big brain instead of the little one
It is inappropriate for you to pursue her. Any bullshit you spew about just being friends is exactly that.... bullshit. You want to fuck her. You both know it. She is protecting her marriage and family which is clearly much more important to her than some old almost-a-fling.
i agree.
 

Big Sleazy

Active member
Sep 13, 2004
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She's married. End of story. Put the shoe on the other foot. If you were married would you want your wife trolling on Facebook ???

BS
 

WoodPeckr

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May 29, 2002
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... But suddenly she decides that we should not communicate anymore, and that she felt too guilty. I told her numerously that I had no intentions with her and respected her marriage completely. But she could not be pursuaded to continue communicating and shut the door on me....
Perhaps she did this after hearing of your Terbie handle and then reading your posts here....:eyebrows:
 

blackrock13

Banned
Jun 6, 2009
40,084
1
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She's married. End of story. Put the shoe on the other foot. If you were married would you want your wife trolling on Facebook ???

BS
'Trolling' no, but if she has friends that she stays in touch with via Facebook , why the hell not. Is your girlfriend supposed to give up all her male friends because you can't handle other guys talking to her when you're not around. Are you that insecure?

The husband may be a jerk, but knowing HD as we do on here. would you be comfortable with his being a friend of your wife/GF? it's more like she doesn't feel it's good/proper/worth it.
 
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