As most of you who know me are aware, my day job is working at an adult store. As I was slaving away this weekend a few interesting things occured, so I thought I would share a few of them with you.
1> A "gentleman" (I use that term in the loosest possible sense) comes into the store Saturday afternoon, and, since I bring my dog to work with me, he crouches down and pets her for a while. She was of course loving this up, cause she is as much of an attention.....err....lover.....as her owner. After he browses around for a while and picks out a couple movies, he comes up to the counter to check out his rentals, gives me this sly sort of sideways look and whispers:
Him: "Do you have any movies with animals, you know, bestiality?"
Me: "That is illegal, we are not allowed to carry things of that nature!"
(At this point I grab my dog and take her to the back room and shut the door)
Him (following me): "I am sure you must have *something*, under the counter perhaps?"
Me: "NO! It is illegal, though if that is what excites you do an internet search I am sure you can find something!"
Him: "Can you get any in for me?"
Me (getting angry): "NO! Absolutely not! We cannot, will not and never will by any stretch of the imagination carry such videos!"
Him: "Okay, okay, no need to get defensive!"
At this point he leaves with his two videos under his arm, and I am trying to stop myself from grabbing the baseball bat behind the counter and knocking his head off.
Now maybe I would not have been so upset if he hadn't been loving it up with my dog, but umm...yeah....it was interesting *chuckles*
2> Today I am at the store again, and I decided that I wanted to peruse one of the popular movies that we sell so much of. The movies are called "Barely Legal" so I am sure I don't have to draw a map to let you know what they are about. First and foremost, the movie combines both the young girl "fetish" with the whole peeing "fetish", which led to many comments by me (a la Mystery Science Theatre 3000). I will admit that porn is not well known for its ability to have a compelling plot and I try not to hold it against them.
One scene in particular got my juices going (creative juices guys, minds out of the gutter now!). This 18 year old goes to visit her father at the fire station where he works. Instead she finds this young, handsome firefighter, who tells her that her dad is not there. (The title of this section is "Fireman's Knob") She offers to help clean the fire truck, because she thinks she "would like polishing knobs". Of course you can all guess what this leads to.
But this is not the part where I got creative. It was further in the scene, as the young buff fireman is having his way with this young innocent girl, and he asks rather forcefully: "Where is your daddy now, kid?"
I pipe in with a plot twist:
(The sound of a zipper is heard in the background and suddenly the fireman feels something poking him)
Dad: Right here! (in a low growl)
Now what guy in their right mind, fully aware that a girl's father could be appearing at any second would, one, be able to perform and two, do it??!! If I were a guy my first thought would be. "Hmmm...it might be awkward if her dad walks in!"
Anyways, enough musing for one night, perhaps I will post more in the future, as more things happen in my interesting day life as the illustrious porn store clerk!
*insert eerie and interesting-sounding music here*
*kisses*
Kassie
1> A "gentleman" (I use that term in the loosest possible sense) comes into the store Saturday afternoon, and, since I bring my dog to work with me, he crouches down and pets her for a while. She was of course loving this up, cause she is as much of an attention.....err....lover.....as her owner. After he browses around for a while and picks out a couple movies, he comes up to the counter to check out his rentals, gives me this sly sort of sideways look and whispers:
Him: "Do you have any movies with animals, you know, bestiality?"
Me: "That is illegal, we are not allowed to carry things of that nature!"
(At this point I grab my dog and take her to the back room and shut the door)
Him (following me): "I am sure you must have *something*, under the counter perhaps?"
Me: "NO! It is illegal, though if that is what excites you do an internet search I am sure you can find something!"
Him: "Can you get any in for me?"
Me (getting angry): "NO! Absolutely not! We cannot, will not and never will by any stretch of the imagination carry such videos!"
Him: "Okay, okay, no need to get defensive!"
At this point he leaves with his two videos under his arm, and I am trying to stop myself from grabbing the baseball bat behind the counter and knocking his head off.
Now maybe I would not have been so upset if he hadn't been loving it up with my dog, but umm...yeah....it was interesting *chuckles*
2> Today I am at the store again, and I decided that I wanted to peruse one of the popular movies that we sell so much of. The movies are called "Barely Legal" so I am sure I don't have to draw a map to let you know what they are about. First and foremost, the movie combines both the young girl "fetish" with the whole peeing "fetish", which led to many comments by me (a la Mystery Science Theatre 3000). I will admit that porn is not well known for its ability to have a compelling plot and I try not to hold it against them.
One scene in particular got my juices going (creative juices guys, minds out of the gutter now!). This 18 year old goes to visit her father at the fire station where he works. Instead she finds this young, handsome firefighter, who tells her that her dad is not there. (The title of this section is "Fireman's Knob") She offers to help clean the fire truck, because she thinks she "would like polishing knobs". Of course you can all guess what this leads to.
But this is not the part where I got creative. It was further in the scene, as the young buff fireman is having his way with this young innocent girl, and he asks rather forcefully: "Where is your daddy now, kid?"
I pipe in with a plot twist:
(The sound of a zipper is heard in the background and suddenly the fireman feels something poking him)
Dad: Right here! (in a low growl)
Now what guy in their right mind, fully aware that a girl's father could be appearing at any second would, one, be able to perform and two, do it??!! If I were a guy my first thought would be. "Hmmm...it might be awkward if her dad walks in!"
Anyways, enough musing for one night, perhaps I will post more in the future, as more things happen in my interesting day life as the illustrious porn store clerk!
*insert eerie and interesting-sounding music here*
*kisses*
Kassie
